Katie's POV

I couldn't stop seeing it, the whole scene at the cave; God! Why was I so stupid? Cook is a charmer none of us understand why, but he has a way of getting a girl to shag him. I felt bad for leaving Emily when I was like this. It's not fair to leave her worried and Naomi, god knows her and I have had our differences, but she is fucking strong I couldn't do that for anyone. I run that's what I do, just run away from my problems that's why I'm currently outside of Keith's pub and almost empty bottle of vodka in my hands. Just waiting for someone to stumble upon me and sadly I get my wish.

"Katie? For the love of god sweetie, what the fuck have you done?"

Of course it was my fucking mum before I knew it she was trying to walk me to the car my arm draped over her shoulder. When she realized she wasn't getting me to move anywhere she called my Dad

"Rob!, Rob!" she shouted and then turned back to me "you have a lot of explaining to do missy."

I didn't see how I could do any explaining in my current state. My head was pounding and I kept thinking about how I could screw up even more if she found out anything else that went on last night. I pushed her off me and knelt on the ground I puked out some of the vodka my throat burned.

My Dad came round with the car.

"Jesus, child! What have you gotten up to?" he exclaimed

"And where is your sister?" my mom said after him.

I could barely focus on their words I kept seeing Effy in the hospital bed, I wanted to go back to see her and I wanted to remember what I said to Freddie , what I did after I left last night.

"I dunno" was all I could manage to say to them.

My father helped me in the car and when we arrived at home my mum ran a bath and cleaned me up. Then she left me alone I guess to get sobered up. I lay back in my bed and looked at the clock 4am, where was Emily? I couldn't remember everything that happened last night, but I remember what I said to Freddie

"You aren't the only one in love with her."

I rolled over burying my head in my pillow, nice one Katie real nice. I fell asleep letting the darkness take me away from everything for a few hours.

I awoke to yelling downstairs

"It's not my problem!" The sound of Emily's voice rang clear throughout the house

"Emily she's your sister shouldn't you be helping her when she needs you instead of letting her wander off."

"I offered to help her and she didn't want it. Can't you ever just leave me alone and stop to think that maybe I have some of my own problems to deal with."

They always fought lately my mum had this grand vision of the perfect family. It was sort of where I always got my vision from. That Emily and I would be happy twins and go off hanging around responsible friends and date the posh boys. None of that was going to happen, I crawled out of bed and made my way down stairs slightly hung-over still.

"What problems Emily? Hanging around to many friends, going to too many parties? You are a bad influence on Katie I would think she would be the one to influence you positively, but no I bet it was because she saw Freddie again no boy has hurt you Emily you could help your sister heal –"

Emily's face was full of rage I know she wanted to let everything out that she had bottled up she wanted to prove my mother wrong, but she couldn't.

"Don't talk about me like I don't live here too." I said as I entered the living room

My mom looked at me embarrassed by everything she had just said.

"I'm sorry sweetie I was just trying to help."

"Well stop trying to help me if you're just going to make Emily feel like shit, she actually is the only one around here that is helping me."

"Whatever you say Katiekins, are you going to school today with Emily?"

Once again she avoided the subjects that needed to be discussed, but I wasn't in the mood to argue with her and Emily looked so run down I knew she wasn't either. Emily walked over to me her hair was disheveled, her eyes still held a hint of worry.

"come on Katie we both need to get ready and go to school."

I nodded and followed her upstairs.

"should I have looked after you Katie? Because I feel so wrong now I shouldn't have stayed there with Naomi because I wanted to be with her I should have looked after you right?"

She had just come back from the bathroom her hair was now tidy and her clothes clean and free of dirt.

"No! oh my gosh Emily stop ok." A look of confusion crossed her face.

"You have your own problems to worry about stop trying to sort mine. I'm glad I came to you with my problem, but It's my problem not yours don't listen to Mum."

She sighed "I'll try but I can't promise."

"I know." We both laughed and went to school and it was an eerie feeling.

The lockers next to me were free of joking insults from Cook, there was an empty seat next to Freddie in English where Effy normally sat, and I felt different. I didn't know yet whether it was a good different or a bad one.