Moment
Part 12: Envy – Faramir

A/N: Argh, school. Hope you enjoy this! Big thank you to my reviewers :)

I used to be jealous of them.

Please don't judge me for it.

You see, I had just lost my brother, and the aching grief was still nearly unbearable. He haunted my dreams every night, and often I would wake to find silent tears falling onto my bedcovers. Éowyn worried, but even she could not comfort me.

The first time I saw them together was at Elessar's coronation. They were closer than friends, that much was clear. They could have been born brothers.

I was in Minas Tirith when I received word that King Thranduil, Legolas' father, had declared war on Gondor. Elessar wept bitterly when Legolas delivered the news, and not even Queen Evenstar could comfort him. His gaze rested on me for only a brief second, but I turned away, tears starting in my eyes. For the grief in his eyes was the same as mine.

Elessar led the soldiers into battle against the Elves, but I knew how every second on the battlefield stabbed him like a jagged dagger. I saw his anguish when Legolas was cut down by Andúril, and I called for retreat.

I do not know how Legolas survived. But the people of the city whispered that the Valar themselves had come to bear him to the Halls, but were turned back by the love between the two brothers. It was unheard of, that love could go so far as to bring back the dead.

I wept when I heard them speak of it. For I remembered the dream I had had, the day my brother was killed. He was falling, and I was the only thing holding him to this earth. I remember begging him, Don't let go. Don't you dare! He simply looked at me, his forest-green eyes sad. I'm sorry, brother, he whispered, and let go.

Three days later, I saw his body in the Elven boat at the river, and knew the dream had been real.

Legolas came to me some days later, his midnight blue eyes looking almost silver in the moonlight. "Faramir, what troubles you?"

I shook my head, trying to wipe the grief from my mind. "There is nothing, hir nîn."

He frowned at me. "I can see your grief in your eyes. It has been so since I first laid eyes on you. And it grows stronger in Elessar's presence, and mine."

I sighed, looking out over the city walls to the Pelennor. "You and the King remind me of my brother and me, only that you are whole."

Understanding settled in his features. "Your brother is not truly gone. Not as long as there are those who still remember him, and love him. He is always with you, in your heart."

Elessar called for him then, and Legolas clasped my shoulder briefly in comfort before turning and running lightly to where the King rested in the gardens. I pondered Legolas' words as I watched the glittering band of River Anduin snake across the land.

I see the truth in Legolas' words now. The grief will never fade, but I will see my brother again someday.

It is odd to think about, but Legolas will outlive Elessar. Elven hearts are not meant to endure grief, but Legolas will have to, someday.