Chapter 12: Lift

Hey! So here's the new chapter. Kensi and Deeks are partners but they're not in a relationship in this one. But that doesn't mean they don't love each other. Plus I'm really not a pro on panic attack so I made some research on internet to understand what it really is. I hope it's not too far away from the reality.

Anyway, I hope you'll love it. Let me know what you think because it's more enjoyable to read your opinions during the week than do my homework. :)

Love from France.

Kensi and Deeks were supposed to go Downtown and ask some questions to the director of the agency. They wanted to know where he had been the night before and with who. That's what they were supposed to do. But when the lift of the rich building stayed close they understood the day would be a little bit longer than what they had planned at the beginning of the working day.

Kensi started to freak out and pressed every buttons. Obviously Deeks told her that it would do nothing and they just had to wait for someone but she kept doing it. It wasn't that she didn't want to listen to him, she just couldn't hear him. She was breathing heavily, her chest moving faster than as usual. Even though she was pressing every buttons at the same time, Kensi couldn't see anything. It was like a blur took possession of her vision. She couldn't see anything and coudn't calm herself. She was shaking and felt like she was litteraly going to die if the doors stayed close. And obviously, The lift wasn't opening, Deeks was beside her, evaluating the situation while Kensi was clearly freaking out. He needed to find something to tell her before she would go nuts. If it wasn't the case already. They had been partners for more than two years and he didn't even know she had a thing with lift. Well, they never had been stuck in one so that explain a lot actually. But he understood at that moment that there were so much he didn't know about her. He promised himself he would change that during the following weeks. He cared about her and a few days before, he noticed he wanted to get closer to her. Eating some take-out on her couch while watching TV with beers wasn't enough anymore. He wanted more and he truly hoped she wanted it too.

You need to think.

Think FAST Deeks.

He looked at her intensely before taking her hand. He needed to clear her head real quick. At first, he remembered something he read in an article. It said that you could kiss the person who is having a panick attack because it would hold the person's breath for seconds. Frankly, he wanted to kiss her for so long. But not like that. She was terrified and if he did have kissed her, he was ready to bet everything he had that Kensi would have punch him as hard as she could. So yeah, he wanted to kiss her but it was so not the good time to do it. He felt so useless seeing her like that. He couldn't see a way to help her when she was in distress like that. What kind of friend that makes me ? That was all he could think about. If he wasn't able to help her when she needed the most then maybe, he wasn't the right person for her. He really wanted to help her but seeing her like that stopped him. He couldn't think clearly when she was miserable and that was the worse moment to stop thinking. It was just the both of them in there so he had to find a solution and help her. Kensi was the strongest person he ever met and now she was a true mess, pressing these buttons and punching the doors. He could see her breathing was faster than it was supposed to be. He attracted her to the floor in front of him and tightened his hand on hers. This way, she knew he was with her and he wasn't letting go. He wouldn't let her at any costs.

"Okay." Deeks tried to breathe as normal as possible because he didn't want her to be more terrified than she already was. "What's your full name?" He asked, looking at her deeply.

Kensi stared at him, without understanding where he wanted to go with that question. They had known each other for years of course he knew her name. What was the point to that ?

"Wha-what the fuck ?"

"I'm asking you a question. What's your full name ?" He kept her hand in his without moving. He just looked at her in hope that she would calm herself promptly. He nodded his head to encourage her to answer.

"Ken-Kensi Mary Blye, why ?"

"What's your favorite movie ?"

"You know what it is. Just make this stop Deeks !"

"You have to trust me on this Kens. So answer me. Tell me what's your favorite movie. Go ahead."

She started to tight his hand too. She held him so much it hurt him. She wasn't letting go either. Because, well, she needed him. He was her partner after all and knowing that she could rely on him felt great. It felt so great to finally be able to trust someone and be a 100% sure that she wouldn't end up all alone. It was actually the first time she felt like this.

"Titanic. It's Titanic." She said in a whisper, staring at him.

Talking calmed her down. Holding his hand calmed her down. Just his presence calmed her down.

"What was the last plant you killed ?" He tried to make her laugh to make her think of something else than the doors still closed. And apparently it worked pretty well. This discussion always had been a moment of laugh between them and the rest of the team. So he took advantage of it.

She saw his slight smile and tried to grin too. "A cactus. I killed a cactus, last week."

Deeks laughed because God, she was so bad with plants. That was so funny and in the meantime, adorable. Because even though she tried hard, she kept failing at it. That was probably the only subject where Kensi would fail. He still had his hand in hers and started to caress it with his thumb. It worked. She was thinking about something else and was slowly being her again. He couldn't stop there. First, because she would be totally peaceful after, no more panick attack for the day. But mostly because he would get to know more about her and that was all he wanted to do.

Kensi perfectly knew how to hide her feelings and her past. She didn't let anyone enter her personal space or her mind. So when Deeks had the opportunity to discover new things about her, even small ones, he would always take the chance. He couldn't stop looking at her. Even when she had tears in her eyes, sobbing and trying to find her breath, he thought she was beautiful. She was just so beautiful to him. He was about to ask another question, a personal one, to learn something new. But unfortunately, the fate decided something else. The doors of the lift opened all of a sudden and the two partners saw a security guard and the director in question. Deeks sighed discreetly because again, he had missed a shot. They both got up, still holding hands, and Kensi tried her best to act professional. At first, they didn't even stopped holding their hands because for the both of them, it felt so natural. As if it was normal to do so.

Thirty minutes later they went out of the building. They took the stairs just to be sure that they wouldn't get stuck all over again. They sat quietly in their car and stayed in this position for a minute or so. Kensi put her hand on his and opened her mouth to talk but no sound came out of it. She breathed in and turned her head to be able to gaze at him.

"Thank you Marty." She felt his hand wrapping hers and smiled softly. He could see her dimples and all over again, he thought how much she was pretty.

"I'm your partner. That's my job to protect you."

And for the second time of the day, Deeks wanted to kiss her and never let her go.