Conversations with My Killer
Chapter 12 - Hobbled by His Heart

"Stop squirming around, and go to bed."

"With you?"

He stumbled over his next words. "Without me. I'm not sleeping with you ever. Like never fucking ever."

"But you do want to kiss me."

"Stop playing the tease. It isn't funny."

No more teasing. This was as serious as I got. "Jasper, I won't stay for Edward, but I will stay for you."

Jasper pushed me off his lap and onto the floor. I landed with a hard thump.

"You will not stay for me. I don't want you."

There were gentler ways of rejecting me. Shit. I rubbed my tail end. "Could you be easy on my butt? I'm breakable."

"You're fine. Now get up and get out."

"This is my room. You get out."

He moved to leave. I grabbed his foot. As proof of just how flustered he was, Jasper fell down. Seeing him hit the floor had me rolling. It served him right.

"You sure lose your footing a lot around me. I think I'm your kryptonite, Superman."

My capeless hero rolled onto his back and stared up at the ceiling. It was cracked and not that fun to look at. I, on the other hand, was very fun to look at. Not bragging or nothing, but damn, I was young, firm, and fun.

I crawled over to him and touched an index finger to the tip of his nose. "I knew you'd fall for me, Jasper."

"Shut up before I bite you."

Hot and cold. Off and on. Heads and tails. He flipped between his emotions like an amateur grilled meat. Flip. Flip. Poke. Flip.

"There is nothing between us. Accept it."

Actually, there were three inches of physical space and a mile of his internal angst. Neither was insurmountable. "I accept that you don't want to care about anyone. I also know it'll take you some time to adjust, but if you could hurry up and move beyond that stage, I'd really appreciate it."

The statue returned. "Stop thinking like an overemotional child. Any feelings we share are amplified by the events of the day."

Not so much. "To be honest, I like you less today than I did last week. You should really work on that before the affection is gone and the disinterest sets in."

Jasper was dead set on flipping and poking his meat. "I will not allow either of us to misinterpret our feelings for one another. It would be irresponsible to do otherwise."

"And I'm food, right?"

"Yes. By virtue of my nature, you are nothing more to me than a snack."

Basically, he got spooked, which caused him to speak like a mechanical based coward. "I'm changing your name to Radio Shack. They should sell you on a shelf."

He sat up and proceeded to cut me with his eyes. "I'm changing your name to Titanic. You throw yourself at men like we're the last lifeboat on a sinking ship."

Introducing Radio Shack and Titanic. He'll eat you. She'll watch. Afterwards, they'll entertain each other with mud prophesying and stray dogs.

There were times when the strangeness of our relationship caught up to me. This was one of them. I needed a normal man. Someone without sharp teeth and throat issues.

"I should have fallen for Mike Newton. He's a good enough guy. Smart. Funny. He isn't dead. He's the type that would try really hard to please a girl."

"And never get it right," Jasper snapped.

"Hey now. Don't discount effort. It can take you far."

"In his case, not far enough."

I kicked at him. "What do you care? You just rejected me."

He held up the index finger of truth. "Corrected. Not rejected."

What did that even mean? "Talk in squares. Your circles make me dizzy."

"You're dizzy. I'm doopy. We're a shit pairing."

"You are so negative. Can't you see the good in anything?"

Jasper might not have told me to piss off, but his expression sure did. "You aren't going to give up, are you?"

"Phsst. I got better ways of spending my time than mooning over you. I may want to be with you, but it's not critical to my survival."

"You're over it that fast? I knew you were a flake."

"Oh, I'm sorry. Am I supposed to beg you to love me? Because that's not gonna happen ever. Like never fucking ever."

Tossing his words back at him made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. Sort of bee like. Buzz.

There was plenty of time to change his mind about us later. Tonight, I was tired of the back and forth. "Thank you for telling me the truth about the family. I know you didn't have to, but I appreciate it. Now I'd really like to go to bed."

Jasper's mood switched up again. He smiled and reached for a lock of my hair. He twisted around a finger. "It's about time. You won't miss anything. I swear."

Wrong again. I'd miss him.

The new information Jasper gifted me with last night left me with almost as many questions as it did answers. I put a few loose connections together and came up with some new theories about what was going on with him. Since he was so forthcoming last night, I hoped he might feel inclined to answer a few more questions today.

I had just finished my Jasper provided breakfast when I spoke up. "Do you work for the Volturi?"

He lowered the newspaper he was reading. "Where did you come up with that idea?"

"I think it's the reason the Cullens fear you. Plus, it explains something Edward told me one time. He said the rules don't always apply to you when it comes to killing vampires."

"Edward is a moron. The rules apply to all of us. The trick is not getting caught by a Volturi scout."

"They have scouts?"

"How else do you think they stay in power? Three vampires can't control the world on their own. They divide the continents into regions and depend on a network of trusted members to maintain order."

Jasper still hadn't said if he worked for them. "You're part of the network, right?"

"I haven't even met Aro, Caius, or Marcus, and I will never report to them. If I did, you'd be sitting pretty in a cage in Italy."

There went that theory. "Do they know about you? You said Aro collects people like you."

I could tell he was less than happy with the topic, but he didn't sidestep it. He met it head on.

"Aro would love to get his hands on me, but I've managed to elude him so far. I think he's figured out that my skill set makes me too much of a risk. If you ask me, it's all for the best. I wouldn't last a day in his collection of sycophants."

On to theory two. "Are you hiding out from them? You said you've eluded Aro's clutches. Do the Cullens provide you sanctuary?"

Jasper went back to reading his newspaper. "Having curiosity doesn't entitle you to answers, Bella. My life. My business."

Boo. I threw a piece of cereal at him. "Come on. Tell me something. What about the boyfriend Emmett claims you have? What's his name?"

He let out a heavy sigh as he turned the page. "Don T. Exits."

That was a terrible name. "Who adds in their middle initial? It's a little too George W. for me."

He laughed. "You are one in a million, sunshine."

"Thank you."

Jasper set the paper down, and I took my turn reading it. There was a huge fire in Astoria after we left yesterday. Two houses burned down and another sustained heavy smoke damage.

"Fires are so sad. People lose everything."

"Fire is a gift from the gods. Without it, you'd be someone's cave keeper instead of the lovely flibbertigibbet that you are. Oh wait, you're both."

He knew better than to say stuff like that. "Fancying up the word silly doesn't make it any better. I still find it offensive."

"And yet, cave keeper goes unnoticed. Interesting."

Why shouldn't it? "I like a clean house. It's not a crime."

"In six months, you'll be draining our deer into buckets since you can't cook us meals. Esme will love having someone else to play housekeeper with her."

Esme was a natural caretaker. She did it because she enjoyed it.

And just what the hell was his problem today? "Was the coffin a tight fit last night? Or did you get up on the wrong side of the moat?"

"As usual, you turn to silly quips. Try something new for a change."

"I guess I'll settle for telling you how ridiculous and predictable it is for you to push me away with insults. Jasper Whitlock, he sure is typical today. How disappointing."

More predictable behavior. Jasper left.

Panama and I had the whole day to ourselves. It was good to have some quiet. I hadn't spent this much time alone since – I couldn't remember when. I doubt I had been truly alone since I came to Washington. It wouldn't surprise me if the Cullens had me under constant surveillance for the last year and a half. When I wasn't physically within sight of them, I was still floating in and out of Alice's visions.

What did it say that the one I trusted the most was the biggest killer in the bunch? Probably nothing good. The evidence of Jasper's kills was displayed prominently on the walls as tally marks. Each had a story and only he knew what it was.

– … the dead people are in the basement.

I had to know if he was serious. I opened doors until I found the right one. My reckless puppy pushed by me and ran down the stairs. It wasn't that I was nosy. I was fetching my dog. And sniffing the air for dead people. My nose provided little help. I only smelled basement.

It wasn't a house of horrors. It was nothing. Boxes and furniture. A chair that resembled one I had in my room. A couple gallons of paint. Some rolled up rugs.

"What are you doing down here?"

Jasper. He scared me. "I was curious about the bodies."

"No dead people. Just boxes."

I saw my reflection in a mirror leaned up against the south wall. There was something familiar about it. The mirror, not my face.

I pointed it out to Jasper. "Where did you get that?"

"This isn't my house, remember?" He stirred me back around to the stairs. "We need to talk."

Goody. "Have you figured out we make a great pair?"

"Are you daft? We clash. No one wants to watch a Tarantino movie starring Snow White."

I begged to differ. I would pay good money to see what that sick bastard would do with the seven dwarfs. His cinematic brilliance brought me Mr. Blonde. I was forever grateful.

"Bella, there is no us. You are still under the influence of emotions I am unable to control. Allowing them to dictate our choices is foolish."

The statement sounded like VCR instructions being read out of an old manual. Any minute now he'd tell me which button to push to get my clock working. Slide a finger over this one nice and easy. Gentle pressure will get the ball rolling. Repeat until you reach the proper hour. Beware of minutes. Repetitive rubbing could lead to stuttering and muscle tightening. Use additional fingers to set the alarm.

Hmm. Clocks could be fun. Oh, Mr. Whitlock. Come play with me.

He would never. And really, why couldn't I go play with him? I could. I should. I would.

No, I would not. Did I have no shame? He was right. I did throw myself at him. It was embarrassing how desperate I sounded even to my own ears.

Please love me. Please. Pretty please. I'll be a good girl.

Yuck.

I would never get anywhere hugging his heels. I needed to gain some independence back. Jasper could take a lifetime to come around to my way of thinking. I wasn't going to waste that time waiting on him.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"Edward."

Did we have to? "What about him?"

"Has he ever mentioned anything to you about Borneo?"

"The island?"

"Yes, the island. What else is there? More specifically, did he ever say anything about Miri?"

Jasper could have been speaking Greek for all I knew. "I have no idea what you're talking about. What is a Miri?"

"It's the name of a city. Edward hasn't turned back to go home. He's in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. We know where he's going, but we don't know why."

"I can't help you. He's never mentioned going there."

Was it tacky that a small part of me wanted to high five Edward? "You've had secrets from him for a long time. I think he's entitled to a few of his own."

Jasper wasn't so pleased with my opinion. "You need to pick a side, Bella."

Last night, I offered to be on his side, and he didn't want me. "I'm picking my side. Deal with it."

We returned to Forks and went our separate ways. With Edward on the other side of the world, I had no concerns for the time being. I was actually pretty damn good for a change.

Helping my new found happiness along was a chat I had with the Cullens. I confronted them about their motives. They sat down with me and explained their side of the story. I came away without even a shred of anger or disappointment in them. Their crime was serious, but their motives were something I could understand. They wanted to protect their family. If I were in their shoes, I would do the same.

They understood when I told them I needed to take a step back from the family and figure out my own future. They hoped it would be with them, but they would support me if it wasn't.

New information came out of my meeting with them that Jasper had failed to tell me. They were not the first ones to point out my potential. He was, and it occurred months after I was already with Edward. Rather than believe one side over the other, I figured the truth was somewhere in the middle. It usually was.

It took three days for Jasper to come around again. I had given myself strict rules to avoid him. The time must have gotten to him because he sought me out. He even showed up at the front door like a normal person.

"Selling Girl Scout cookies?" I teased.

"No, but we can braid each other's hair and gossip about boys if you want."

Tempting but no. "I'm in the middle of something. Sorry."

Jasper stepped up and volunteered to help. "I know you're cleaning the house. Let me help."

"Cave keeping is for us barefoot and pregnant types. You should run along and go gather up some meat for the fire."

To say I was still pissed at him was putting it mildly. He could take his happy self down the road and charm the neighbors for all I cared.

I attempted to close the door. He stuck his foot in the way. "I'm sorry. Genuinely sorry. There's nothing wrong with being a caretaker. Esme is actually one of the few people I respect. If you model yourself after her, you'll get no complaints from me."

I wasn't modeling myself after anyone. I cleaned and cooked because my dad worked fourteen hour days. I was an unemployed student. Why shouldn't I do my part to contribute? Plus, it wasn't like he didn't help. He did his own work around the house. I wasn't responsible for his laundry or any of the outdoor chores. We worked together to keep the house in good shape.

"Bella, I miss you and Panama. Let me spend the day with you. I'll be good. I swear."

I missed him, too, but our poor dog was suffering the most. He stuck his nose through the crack in the door and nudged Jasper's leg. The little whine he let out was heartbreaking.

I gave in. "Fine, but I'll kick you out the second you start acting like a jerk."

After a ten minute session of Panama playtime, Jasper jumped right in and helped with my chores. This would have been great if he had a clue how to actually do anything. I had to show him how to use the vacuum cleaner. Dusting led to a broken beer stein and a hole in the wall after he became frustrated. The best – or worst – part was the kitchen.

I was finishing up the downstairs bathroom when he hollered out my name for the fifth time. I found him sitting on the floor playing with foam that was pouring out of the bottom of the dishwasher.

He patted a mound of it onto Panama's head. "You look like a foamy angel dog."

I wasn't so happy. "What did you do?"

"I broke it," he stated evenly.

"Don't just sit there. Get some towels."

Jasper moved like a snail. He was bored and very disgruntled. He was also going to be buying new cabinets if he didn't get a move on it.

My patience wore out. "Now."

While he worked, I googled a solution. Fabric softener was the easiest fix, not that it made any sense to me. I did as instructed. After the kitchen was clean, I was free to interrogate the offender.

"What soap did you use?"

"The bottle next to the sink. It says it's for dishwashing, but I beg to differ."

"That's for dishes you wash in the sink. You have to use a different soap in the machine."

"Ridiculous," he complained. "There should be one universal soap. How can anyone keep up with all this?"

"They ask questions if they don't know something."

Jasper pouted like a child who had been denied candy. "I can speak fourteen languages and juggle six items at once. Why is cleaning so hard?"

Because Esme did all the work at his house. Wait a minute. That didn't make any sense either.

"How can you not know these things? You watch television, and I know you've seen Esme clean. Not to mention, it would have made more sense for you to wash the dishes by hand. You would have been done much quicker."

A sneaky smile revealed the truth. He was messing with me. It was probably his way of breaking the ice that had built up between us. When he saw that I had caught on to his little scheme, he threw a wet towel at me and ran off.

I went chasing him through the house. "Jasper Whitlock, you get back here right now."

I could hear him laughing but couldn't see him. One second it sounded like he was in the study. The next I heard him upstairs.

"Stay in one place, you cheater," I shouted.

The laughter stopped, and the hunt began. "Pan, where's Jasper?"

Our mutt helped me check all the downstairs rooms before moving upstairs. No stone was left unturned. Closets. Beds. Bathrooms. Behind doors. He was nowhere to be found.

The answer came to me when I returned to my room and saw the window was up. He was outside. It figured. I turned around intending to go after him and ended up running right into him.

"You suck at this game, Bella."

Forget the game. Why was he wet? And did he know his shirt was molded to him? Probably not because I was, too, which was way more important. We were sort of stuck together. He wasn't moving, and I wasn't either. Not that I really could with one of his hands on my waist holding me in place.

His fingers worked their way under my shirt. It made me think of way too many things. My own hands hung loosely at my sides. They were as confused about what to do as I was.

A prudish voice in my head was informing me of just how wrong this was but only because it felt right, which meant it couldn't be wrong. And none of that made a damn bit of sense.

When Jasper spoke, his voice came out in a deeper tone than usual. "We need to go to the store. You're low on milk."

"There's an unopened gallon in the fridge."

His fingertips moved lightly over the contours of my face. "Do you have to challenge everything I say?"

"Do you have to keep pushing me away when I know it's the last thing you want to do?"

"Yes."

It was my turn to shut down. The alternative would be a rerun of half our other conversations, and I wasn't watching TvLand. I was trying to live my life.

I stepped back from him. "You should go now."

"Answer something for me first. Why are you still wearing his ring?"

"Because I'm not the girl that breaks up with someone over the phone or while they're searching remote caves in Borneo. When Edward gets back, we'll talk. Until then, I still consider myself engaged to him."

Jasper took a hold of my shoulders. "Caves? Was there a note? Did he call you?"

"No. I did some research and came to my own conclusions. Shouldn't you know this already? He isn't with a wolf. Alice can see him now."

"Her visions come in pieces. They're not always easy to put together."

That was probably only half of the truth. "You're keeping something from me. What is it?"

"I'm entitled to my own secrets just like Edward. Deal with it."

He threw my own words back at me. It was a painful habit we both developed. This was what our friendship had turned into. There was no progress here. He was still angry over whatever pissed him off in the first place. I was still refusing to put up with his back and forth crap.

I danced my fingers like he did the night he dismissed me at the hotel. "Run along now. We don't need you here."

We did pissy better than we ever did nice. It was too bad. We could have been good together.

The next afternoon Jasper was back at my house. I was swimming in memories from our earlier conversations, and he seemed content to watch me drown. I knew that was exactly what I was doing. Nothing would ever come of any interest between the two of us. Thinking on it was an exercise in futility, but I couldn't seem to stop.

I wasn't even sure why I let him in the house. Seeing him made my skin burn and my head hurt. A simple brush of our fingers had me closing my eyes and imagining impossible dreams.

Stupid girl. He doesn't want you. Move on.

I needed something mundane and dull to help keep my head clear. This left us going through my closet and turning it from an organized Edward closet to a disaster zone. Jasper rifled through my shirts tossing ones we hated into a pile and hanging our favorites to the side. Our tastes were remarkably similar.

He flung one over to me. "I dare you to try this one on."

The one he picked was easily the worst of the bunch. Alice sent it to me few months ago. The girl had never even met me, but she sent me clothes every few weeks. I never wore any of it.

Jasper turned back to the closet, and I changed into the blouse.

"Tell me what you think. Is it a keeper?" I asked.

He laughed when he saw me. "I think my grandmother wore that, and she died in 1859."

The blouse was old fashioned and just plain ugly. I could see it inspiring a murder or ten. "I feel like Lizzie Borden."

Jasper's eyes lit up. "Lizzie Borden took an axe."

I grinned wide. "And gave her mother forty whacks."

"When she saw what she had done."

"She gave her father forty-one," I finished.

"I love that you knew that."

His smile. My heart. Not good.

Anyone but Jasper. Anyone.

I sat down on the floor and began folding the reject pile of clothes. Jasper joined me. A foot separated us. Even with the lack of contact, my skin still tingled. His smell tickled at my nose and made my head swim.

When we reached for a shirt at the same shirt, our hands brushed. We both dropped the shirt and then picked it back up again.

Jasper finally tugged it out of my hands. "I'm keeping this one for myself."

He wasn't satisfied with the shirt and pointed over at my bulletin board. "I'm also taking that paper with your name spelled out in purple crayon and the one with the turkey made from your hand print."

Why was I not surprised? This man loved souvenirs. I had yet to see him not wearing the ring he took from me. It was still right there on the middle finger of his left hand. I didn't even mind how he claimed my belongings, which was probably good since he never asked. I even let him keep all the stuff I found in his bag.

I brought us back to poor Lizzie. "So Lizzie Borden. Did you – uh – follow her trial?"

"Everyone did."

"That was a long time ago."

"Yep."

Did I just imply he was old? Was he offended? Why was I even worried about this? He never cared if he hurt my feelings.

"What's it like watching the world change while you stay the same?" I asked.

"I'm not the same nor do I want to be. To remain unchanged is to never learn. Anyone who believes otherwise is a fool."

This was the Jasper I adored. I could listen to him for hours. "Tell me more."

"I remember a time when a man would open a door for a woman but not feel she was worthy of the right to vote. Women were supposed to be hobbled by their femininity. It took a while for me to see that men were hobbled by their egos."

"In other words, you were a sexist pig."

"I was a product of my environment. It wasn't just our views on women. You forget that I remember slavery. Heck, Bella, I advocated it."

This shocked me. "I can't believe that."

"I saw other races as less than human, which was very common back then. Once you're exposed to more vampires, you'll see that our kind lacks diversity. Why do you think that is?"

I had a pretty good idea. "When a person is turned, it is usually by an older vampire seeking companionship. They are naturally drawn to the familiar, someone similar to them in appearance or opinion."

"Exactly. We value our mirror images. Whether it comes from vanity or just plain racism, I don't know."

"And what about you?"

"I'm probably worse than others. They may discriminate, but they at least value other people. With few exceptions, I only value myself."

It was kind of strange. As an empath, he was able to connect on a personal level to everyone around him. I guess I always thought this meant he was sympathetic to whatever those feelings might be, but he wasn't.

"You think less of me now, don't you?" he asked.

Not even a little bit. In fact, it was just the opposite. "I'm starting to believe I couldn't think more of you than what I do."

Jasper's hopeful eyes met mine. "Really?"

I nodded my head slowly. "Yeah."

Gravity seemed to pull us closer. It was that half-smile of his. It drove me crazy. Those lips of his practically dared me to give him a reason for a real smile.

"Jasper, you should go downstairs."

Closer. "Should I?"

Definitely. "I can finish this."

"Can you?"

I could, but I would much rather have his help. With the way one of his hands gripped my thigh, I could safely say he wanted to offer any assistance I needed.

Our lips almost touched before he was gone.

Charlie's booming voice came out of nowhere. "What are you wearing, Bells?"

What just happened? I blinked as the room settled back around me. I even shook my head a little trying to clear it. I stole a look over at Jasper, who was now a respectable distance from me. He had moved just in time.

My dad spoke slowly. "What are you wearing?"

I had no idea. I looked down. It was the ugly shirt. "It's something Alice sent me."

"Oh."

Jasper stood up. "I think there's a game on. Are you planning on watching it, Chief Swan?"

My dad surprised me with his response. "You're welcome to join me. Oh and call me Charlie. All of Bella's friends do."

No, they did not, and he never tried to change that either. He also never invited them to watch baseball with him.

Charlie left the room, and Jasper's face turned from genial to furious. "I almost didn't hear him."

"We were talking, and you got distracted."

"It wasn't the talking."

He was starting to cave. It took him long enough.

"You know what it was," I challenged.

More of the dead guy. "It was nothing. You smell good is all."

This was getting old. "For someone who doesn't measure his goodness by what he denies himself, you sure keep your distance from me."

"Take off the ring, and I might reconsider."

The ring had nothing to do with us. "Don't use my ring as an excuse. You don't respect other people's relationships. If you decided you wanted me, a piece of metal wouldn't stand in your way."

"Bullshit. You're wearing it because a part of you still wants Edward."

No, I didn't. "I'm wearing it because I refuse to broadcast my breakup to the rest of the town before I even discuss it with Edward. He deserves that much from me. If you don't agree, that's your problem."

"Don't play the good girl with me. I know it's a lie."

"There is no good and bad, Jasper. There is only who you are and how you feel about yourself. You taught me that."

A week went by and no Edward. I was unsure of just what was going on with Jasper and me. He was a locked safe. He kept his thoughts and opinions to himself unless I asked for them, which I refused to do.

Adding more to the bubbling emotions was Charlie. My father wasn't even bothering to hide just how happy he was about the changes between Edward and me. Edward disappeared off the planet. I stopped talking about him. Charlie couldn't stop smiling.

The one thing throwing him off was that Jasper had replaced Edward as my constant companion. Prior to our trip last week, Jasper and I spent an hour or so together every day. That changed. Now, neither of us could stay away from the other.

The second I woke up in the morning, my hand reached for the phone so I could call him. He would arrive at the exact moment I walked into the kitchen.

I put a bagel in the toaster; he smeared it with cream cheese after it popped up. I poured a bowl of cereal; he added the milk. I ate, and he talked to Charlie about baseball. This all started the second day he was here. We found a routine and stuck with it.

It wasn't until today that Charlie said anything. Jasper received a phone call and stepped outside to answer it. My dad took advantage of his absence, not knowing that Jasper could hear his every word.

"When is Edward coming back?"

"I'm not sure. He hasn't said."

Charlie moved on to a new and trickier topic. "What's going on with you and Jasper?"

I didn't have a clue. "He's my friend. We talk."

"Yeah, you talk. And smile. And make eyes at each other when the other isn't looking."

My stupid mouth smiled. It loved my time with Jasper as much as the rest of me. "It isn't like that."

Okay. It was exactly like that and getting worse.

Charlie's brow wrinkled when he looked at the front door. "You're different with him."

"What do you mean?"

"When you look at Edward, it's like you're hoping you meet with his approval. You turn cautious and uptight the second he walks in the door."

He wasn't telling me anything I didn't already know. What I really wanted was his thoughts on my new friend. "And how am I with Jasper?"

"Unafraid. Relaxed. You're free to be yourself, and it shows."

True, but I also walked on eggshells waiting for our next setback. The dance between us was wearing me out.

My dad wasn't done with me. "You need to figure out why you're happier with one than the other. And the one making you happy isn't the one you're marrying."

Jasper picked that exact moment to walk back in the house.

Charlie cleared his throat. "I'm heading out. You two have a good day."

He put his dishes in the sink and went for the front door. He turned back just for a second. "Take care of our girl, Jasper."

"Yes, sir."

Nice test, Dad. Could you be any more obvious?

I pushed my dishes away and pounded my head on the tabletop. Edward would have stopped me. Jasper sat in the chair next to me and let me do my thing.

When I finished my self-flagellation, I pointed out the discrepancy. "Edward always tells me I'm going to give myself a concussion. He stops me. You never do."

"Honestly, I keep hoping you'll knock yourself out."

I turned my head to the side and looked at him. "Why?"

He didn't answer right away. He took a second to push my hair back behind my ears and caress my cheek with his thumb. "It'll probably be the only time I'll get to watch you sleep."

"Stop. You can't keep throwing words like that at me and then pushing me away again. It hurts."

"This time is different."

For how long? I wasn't falling for it this time. It would crush me when he knocked me on my butt again. "It's never different, and I'm done putting up with it. Get out."

Jasper wasn't giving up. "I swear it's different. Let me stay with you tonight. I'll prove it."

Unbelievable. "No. Never. Ever. Remember those words? Fucking never."

He turned his pretty eyes on me and gave me a look of angelic innocence. "Technically, I will never sleep with you. Punishing me for delivering facts is hardly sporting of you."

The playful tone sent me over the edge. "Are we playing golf? If so, I'm shoving my putter straight down your fang hole."

"I'm sensing you're angry."

I sensed he suffered from dual personalities. "Get out."

Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed the update.

Thanks again for taking the time to read. Chapter 13 should post next Wednesday or Thursday.

- Cris

Here's a line from the next chapter:

"Let me stay, and I'll tell you why I didn't kill Maria."