Kara315: Thanks for the review! I can't give anything away, but the next two chapters are full of drama, angst and so much more ;)
karrie .conner .1: Thanks for the review :):)
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This is a long one peeps! Also... some explicit language comin' your way :P
Bamby
NPOV
I wanted her. You have no fucking idea how much I wanted her. Victoria was nothing like my wives. She was strong and she was smart, but I knew she was also gentle and caring- seeing her with her daughter the other day told me that. She was drop dead gorgeous as well. When I saw her jump out of the truck, her hair pulled out of her face and up on top of her head, dressed in a tight grey shirt with a red flannel wrapped around her waist and a pair of tight faded black jeans... I was hard in an instant.
Then when I watched her fight Dwight and take him down... Fuck. Me. It was when she'd straddled him on the ground, that's when I couldn't keep my thoughts from running wild as I imagined myself between those juicy legs of hers.
When I'd pulled her up, I'd tugged harder than necessary on purpose. Feeling her hand press against my chest. I was sure she hadn't noticed her fingers spread against my shirt curiously. Her cheeks had flushed as my hand rested on her side. I knew it. She liked me. Sure, she hated me. I didn't blame her for that. I also knew she hated the fact that she liked me. But she still liked me.
Seeing her rest a hand on the railing and look down at my people had me grinning again. I knew she was a leader for her own people, but I also knew Rick held the most power. She was more of a second in charge kind of person. In the end, it was Rick's choice. Thinking about her standing there as I ruled over these people... none of my other wives were power hungry. I never chose women who wanted control because I did not share very well. But I thought I could make an exception when it came to Victoria. That's how badly I wanted her.
We stepped through the double doors that led to the parlour my wives spent most of their time in. All six were there, sitting around as they read books, talked to each other, listened to music, or did whatever it is they did. They were all dressed in gorgeous black dresses, with heels on and their hair done. They were stunning.
"Ladies," I spoke, catching their attention. "Don't mind the kid or Victoria here," I told them before they all went back to what they'd been doing.
Glancing over, I could see both Carl and Vickie looking around the room. It was a pretty fancy room- especially considering it was the end of the world- everything looked like it came out of some millionaire magazine. Golds, whites and greys. A chandelier, velvet lounges, cabinets stocked with crystal glass bottles filled with only the finest of alcohol beverages. It was a pretty fancy room indeed.
Grinning, I turned my focus on Carl- who was on the other side of Vickie. "I know. Every woman where you're from dresses like they do the books at an auto shop. You're gonna want to look at their titties. It's cool. I won't mind. They won't mind. Knock yourself out."
Victoria turned to glare at me.
I couldn't help but chuckle lightly as I brought a hand up to brush some of her stray hair behind her ear. "He's almost a man, Sweetheart, it's gonna happen sooner or later."
She pushed my hand away as she continued to glare. "For starters, I'd really like to know when you're gonna stop calling me that. Secondly, you're not his father so back off. And thirdly, we don't dress like we work at an auto shop, we dress like we're ready for action. Heels and dresses are impractical."
My grin simply widened. I loved how she wasn't afraid to speak her mind to me. "You're under my roof, so I'll do what I want, Sweetheart. And don't worry." I leaned in closer to whisper in her ear, "It doesn't matter what you wear, you'll always be super-hot."
When my breath brushed against her ear, she shuddered and tugged on my arm slightly. She didn't mean to pull me to her, I think she'd just flinched, but either way, I was suddenly a little closer to her, breathing in the smell of her. She smelt amazing, by the way. Like the woods, and sweat, and pure woman.
Pulling back, I continued to grin at her, giving a wink before I turned my attention to my wives.
Sherry was looking in our direction. She was sitting with Amber, comforting her fellow wife, but she was also watching Victoria and me. There was a look of worry in her gaze. She never liked it when another woman joined my side. Not that she was jealous, I knew that. She'd just prefer it if she could warn the women away.
I never hurt my wives. I told the truth the other day when I said I hated to kill women. Violence towards the better sex was something I did not condone. Yet Sherry felt the women I took under my wing would be a lot safer if they weren't married to me. I wasn't exactly sure why, but I never questioned it. I didn't really care. It's not like she could actually do anything.
Keeping my eyes on Sherry, I spoke. "Can I talk to you for a minute, dear wife? Make yourself comfortable," I told Victoria and Carl before moving over to the bar, meeting Sherry there. I sighed, reaching for a crystal bottle of scotch. "What happened with Amber and Mark?" I asked, pouring her a drink.
She just looked at me, uncaring. "What we talk about when you're not here is none of your business."
I chuckled lightly, turned on by her sass. "Fair play." I grinned, grabbing myself a beer. "You wanna know what I heard? I heard that Mark skipped out on redirect duty to be with Amber," I noted as I opened the beer bottle. "I need to know if it's true."
She didn't say anything, but she didn't have to. The way she looked away, averting her eyes. I knew in an instant that it was true. But I wasn't going to push for an answer until she admitted the truth.
I took a drink before speaking again, "There are rules for a reason. Nothing matters if you're dead. You, my dear, are here because you get that."
Shaking her head, she looked down at the ground. "She made a mistake." Her eyes then met mine. "Go easy on her."
That right there, pissed me off. "Calm the fuck down," I snapped. "I ever hit one of you?"
"No," she answered right away, still as confident as ever. "But I know you. There's worse."
Standing there, looking at each other for a moment or two, neither of us spoke as we let her words fall between us. Yes, she was right, there was worse. But I was still easy on these ladies. I could be a mean son of a bitch if I wanted. I could do whatever I wanted. But I didn't. I wouldn't. We both knew that.
Letting a grin fall on my lips, I leaned back from her. "Well, look at you!" I chuckled. "To be continued," was all I said before I turned away.
My eyes caught Vickie's in an instant. Carl was looking at me as well, but it was Victoria that held my attention. If any of my wives came close to being like her, it would be Sherry. I had a feeling those two would actually be friends if it weren't for the circumstances... that and the fact that Sherry left Daryl for dead.
Yeah, I knew about that. Dwight had told me everything that had happened after he'd run off with Tina and Sherry. I knew all about Daryl and how he'd helped them. How he saved them from my guys looking for Dwight and the ladies. It's one of the reasons why I know he'll be a good soldier once I break him.
Which brings me back to Vickie. As much as I wanted her, there was no way in hell I'd get Daryl to be loyal to me if I kept her to myself. That right there did not sit right with me. I wanted everything. I wanted all of her. But chances were, I'd never get it.
Moving towards her and her brother, grin still on my lips, I took a drink of the beer before offering it to Vickie. "Here. Loosen up a little."
She looked from me, to the bottle, and then back to me. "No thanks."
Tilting my head, I gave her a warning look. "Sweetheart, remember what I said last time I offered you a drink? You take it when its offered."
Yet she still refused. "I don't drink alcohol," she countered, standing there with her head held high in defiance.
Shaking my head, I let out an amused sigh. "You are going to be the death of me."
"Here's hoping." She glared.
Chuckling, I didn't respond to her words as I stepped over to Carl. She tensed, watching my every move. I knew how protective she was over him. She'd proven time and time again that she'd do anything to keep her brother and all her loved one's safe. Which is exactly why I grabbed Carl's arm and placed the beer in his hand. To piss her off.
She hated every moment of it, but she couldn't do shit. We both knew that in the end, she had to do what I said. We still had that deal, and I was determined to take full advantage of it.
Turning away from the siblings, I set my eyes on one of my wives. She was younger than the others, smaller as well. The baby of the group as my men had said on occasion- of course, they didn't realise I'd heard them say it because they'd never say something like that to my face. She was tiny, with long blonde hair that fell down her back and nearly reached her ass. She had big blue eyes, that were set in fear right now because she knew she'd screwed up.
Walking over, I sat on the chestnut coffee table in front of her. "Amber, baby. You know I don't want anyone here that doesn't want to be here, right?
Refusing to look me in the eye, she nodded. "Mm-hmm."
Leaning closer, I gave her a short nod. "So if you want to leave and go back to Mark you can. But what can't you do?"
She whimpered, finally meeting my gaze. "Cheat on you."
"That is exactly right," I spoke before she could take her next breath. "You can't cheat on me." I shrugged. "There's plenty of other gals who would love to take your place, and there's a few job openings that I can think of. You want to go back to Mark and your mom? Hell, I'll put you all on the same job."
"No." She shook her head, voice wavering. "I- I'll stay. I'm... I'm sorry."
"You know what that means, right?" I grabbed her chin, keeping her eyes locked on mine as I repeated myself, "You know what that means, right?"
"Ye- Yes. I love you, Negan," she answered, on the verge of crying.
"Oh, of course you do, darlin'." I offered her a kind smile. "I don't know why you're crying. It's all gonna work out aces for you." Chuckling lightly I looked over at Victoria, seeing her glaring at me.
If looks could kill...
Turning back to Amber, I leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her forehead before getting to my feet and walking away.
I meant what I said. All of these women had a choice to go- Sherry not so much, it was a little more complicated seeing as Dwight fit into our deal as well. But the rest could leave whenever they wanted. I wouldn't stop them. I would simply give them a job. Which is exactly why none of them wanted to go. They couldn't work. They didn't want to work. So, they chose to stay with me instead.
Coming to stand by Sherry at the bar again, I leaned against the counter I opened my mouth to speak but stopped as she spoke first.
"Who's the girl, Negan?"
I was taken aback, causing my grin to widen. "Well now, I don't think that's any of your business."
She shook her head. "It is if you decide to drag her into this with the rest of us."
My grin fell slightly as I sighed. "Don't worry, I don't think she'll be willing to give up her own husband anytime soon," I assured her, hating that fact more than you could possible understand. "Doesn't mean I won't try," I quickly added as my grin returned. Before she could say anything else, I changed the subject, "Will you get Carson for me?"
Knowing I wasn't going to say anything else about Victoria, she simply sighed and gave a short nod. "Yeah." Turning she went to walk away.
I followed, stopping her after a few steps. "Did you see that? Wasn't hard on her, even though I am very hard in general."
"You're an asshole."
"I know," I admitted with a shrug. "But the messed-up thing is, you like me anyway. You know the truth, just like me." Chuckling, I moved closer to her.
Leaning in, I didn't stop until her lips pressed against mine in a soft yet tender kiss. She responded instantly, her hand coming up to cup my cheek as the kiss continued. It wasn't anything special, but it sure as hell was nice.
I got some satisfaction knowing Vickie was watching as well. I knew she saw me as a monster. I also knew she liked me. Those two conflicting emotions were enough to piss her off. But seeing me with Sherry, well... I just hoped that riled her up even more.
The sound of footsteps caught my attention. But I didn't pull back from Sherry. I wasn't finished. So instead I simple raised my hand and gestured for whoever it was to stop and wait as I continued to kiss one of my many wives.
I was perfectly content kissing Sherry, until I heard Vickie's sharp intake of breath.
DPOV
Walking into Negan's wives' parlour I ignored everything in the room. I'd been here before. I'd been tasked to deliver Negan stuff here once, but I knew he'd make me do it just so he could show off everything he had.
None of it affected me. I couldn't care less about how many women he had. Just as long as Vic wasn't one of them. She was all I wanted and all I cared about. Even seeing Negan and Sherry kissing didn't bother me, because the moment I'd walked through the double doors with Dwight pulling me along, I'd set my eyes on the two people that actually matter. Carl and Vic. Then, as if it was instinct, my eyes locked on to Vic's.
She gasped, shocked at the sight of me. We were so close, barely a few feet between us. If it wasn't for the tray in my hands, Dwight holding me back and Negan being in the room, I would have grabbed her and held her to me.
Negan cleared his throat, causing both Vic and I to look at him. But it was Vic who held his attention as he grinned at her. He didn't say anything, but he didn't have to. It was clear he was telling her not to think about doing anything.
My grip on the tray tightened as my need to hit Negan over the head with it increased.
Grin still firmly in place, he stepped up to me, grabbed a toothpick and stabbing a piece of cheese before eating the snack and turning to Carl. "Carl, will you grab this tray for me?"
Part of me was glad he hadn't asked Vic to do it and part of me wasn't. I knew, if she'd grabbed the tray, she would have found some way to touch me, even if it was just a brush of the fingers. If that had happened... I don't think I could control myself.
Doing as he was told, Carl placed the beer bottle in his hand on the floor and then straightened up to take the tray from me. All of this was done without a single word being said.
The moment he had the tray, I turned to Negan. "Why you got 'em here?"
"Whoa!" Negan shook his head, seeming surprised I'd said something. "What we talk about when you're not here is none of your business." He turned to Sherry and grinned at her for a moment before turning back to me. "Do not make me put this toothpick through the only eye the kid has."
Vic stepped forward in an instant, putting herself in front of Negan as she glared at him. My whole body tensed, but Dwight held me back, keeping me in line.
Negan looked down at Vic, his eyes softening but grin staying in place. "Don't worry, Sweetheart. I haven't forgotten."
I had no idea what he was talking about, but his words seemed to ease Vic- though not by much. She still stood in front of him, ridged and tense. I could tell she was ready for action. She was always ready.
Reaching down, Negan grabbed Vic's left hand, bringing it up into view as he played with the ring around her finger. "I don't think I mentioned this before, but this is a very fine piece." His eyes looked to me as he stepped even closer to her.
I growled in warning but did not move.
Chuckling, Negan shook his head. "I think someone's a little jealous."
"I think you're lucky you took all my weapons," Vic told him, her voice so calm and smooth. It was actually pretty scary...
Looking down at her again, Negan used his other hand to tuck some hair behind her ear. "Oh, I know, Sweetheart. I've seen what you can do, and fuck it's impressive."
"You haven't seen anything yet." She meant it warningly, but he turned her words into something else.
"Promise?" he asked, his voice now dark and husky.
I was ready to rip him to shreds. The way he was looking down at her like there was nothing else in that moment. I knew that look. That's how I looked at her. No one else could. She was mine and I was hers. That's how it works.
Clearing his throat, Negan let go of Vic and took a step away from her as he turned to me. "You go with Dwight. He'll get you a mop." he nodded before turning to Dwight. "Dwighty boy fire up that furnace. I'll be down in a few. Time for a little Deja vu." He grinned as he looked to Vic and Carl. "Come on." Nodding for them to follow him, he then walked out of the room.
With Negan's back turned, and Dwight on the other side of me- unable to see- Vic reached over and let her hand slide into mine as she walked past.
My heart both sunk and swelled at the brief touch.
I wanted to grab her and pull her to me. I wanted to hold her and never let her go. I wanted to tell her how much I loved and missed her. I wanted to fight our way out of this place and take her home. I wanted to keep her safe and protected. I wanted to stay by her side for the rest of our lived. I just wanted her.
But I was smart enough not to do anything. So I gave her hand a little squeeze and then let it go, feeling part of me shatter as I did so.
When I looked back up my eyes met Sherry's as she looked up from where my hand had been holding Vic's. I knew in an instant that she knew. She knew who Vic was to me and what she meant, and she pitied me.
With a hard tug from Dwight, I turned and walked out of the room, leaving Sherry and the rest of Negan's wives as I moved to get back to work...
VPOV
I was a step behind Carl who was a step behind Negan. But when we walked through the next door we came to, I stopped myself as I took in the space.
It was Negan's bedroom, that was clear. But it was nothing like I'd expected. I thought it would have been big, more bold and bright, with a heap of fancy furniture in it. But instead, it was actually quite nice.
A huge dark wood bed with black sheets and pillows. A black leather three-seater couch, glass coffee table and two single black and white stripes single seaters across for that. Long black curtains pulled back from each of the three windows. Light grey paint on the walls. A shelf, some dressers, two doors- that probably lead to a wardrobe and bathroom.
I was in awe of the beauty of the room. Even all the little bits and pieces. Everything seemed to fit. It was perfect.
"Like what you see?" Negan asked.
He'd been holding the door open, watching me. I hadn't paid any attention to him seeing as I was so drawn to the beauty of the room before me. But now, as he leaned closer and whispered in my ear, I felt myself flush as my skin tingled where his breath touched me.
"If my suspicions about why you're here are correct, then I can promise you this... today won't be the only time you'll see my bedroom. So there's no need to take it all in at once. You'll have plenty of opportunities," he told me, his voice low and suggestive.
I hated him. I hated him so much and I hated myself. I hated how I wanted to lean against him as his voice, which sounded like sex- yes, I just said that- made me feel light headed and confused. His words were like a spell which clouded my mind.
Not just that, but every other part of me reacted to him as well. My heart raced, my skin warmed and tingled, my stomach twisted and welcomed the many dancing butterflies that made me feel strange. Only one person ever made me feel this way. Well, two, but one of them had never been this intense.
Shane and Daryl. Shane had only shown me what I could feel. Daryl intensified it all. He made me feel like the only person in the world. He made me feel loved, wanted, needed, desired. He made me feel perfect, because he perfected me. So feeling all these things for Negan, was not okay. Sure, I didn't feel loved, or perfect, or any of the gushy stuff I got when with Daryl. But I felt the heat. Oh boy, was there heat.
Shaking my head, I glared at Negan before moving over to stand with my brother.
Negan closed his door, and moved to sit on the leather couch.
Watching him, Carl spoke as we stood in the middle of the room awkwardly. "Are all of those women actually your-"
Negan cut him off, "Wives?" He grinned at my brother, nodding. "Yeah. Always wanted to screw a whole bunch of different women. I mean, why settle for just one? Why follow the same old rules? Why not make life better?"
He knew perfectly well that his words were pissing me off. I could tell by the way his eyes would flick towards me ever so slightly as if waiting to see how I would react. But I wasn't going to react. No. I wasn't going to give him the satisfaction of seeing me squirm any more.
"Speaking of. Sit." He gestured to the single seats. "Let's get started."
Carl moved first, taking the first seat as he rested the tray of food on the coffee table. "Started on what?"
I moved around the back of the chairs, making my way over to the second. There was no way I was walking past my brother and giving Negan a chance to either stare at my ass or lock eyes with him. I think I'd had enough of him already, and I hadn't even been here for an hour yet- at least it didn't feel like an hour had passed yet.
Negan chuckled, his eyes following me. "I want to get to know you a little better, Carl."
"Why?" Carl asked.
If he could tell something was up between Negan and I, he hadn't said anything yet. I think he could tell though, obviously. He just wasn't saying anything because he didn't want to embarrass me. At least, that's what I was getting from him vibe.
"Work it out." Negan shrugged. "You're smart. In fact, I'm gonna tell you just how smart you are, in case you don't already know. See, I'd expect a kid your age to be moping around, not doing a damn thing, except crying about missing the prom. But you? You go on a mission. You find me, you kill two of my men, and you're smart enough to know that I'm not gonna let this slide."
I shifted on my seat, glaring at him. In the room with his wives, he'd clearly stated that he remembered our deal, but I wasn't leaving anything to chance. If he hurt my brother, I'd hurt him right back. My health and safety be damned.
Negan's eyes flicked to mine as he chuckled lightly. He was enjoying this too much and it was pissing me off even more. "Ah, I can't..." Shaking his head, he turned his attention back to Carl. "I can't do it. It's like talking to a birthday present. You got to take that crap off your face." I flinched as he went on as if it were a big joke. "I want to see what Grandma got me."
"No." Carl glared at him.
Negan's grin fell in an instant as he snapped. "Two men!"
I was on my feet in an instant.
"Sit down, Victoria," he warned, his voice only slightly calmer. "I can't hurt him, but I can hurt Daryl."
His words made me drop back to the chair as my heart sunk. He was right. I could do jack shit. If I tried anything, he'd just take it out on the people I loved. He wouldn't hurt me. That would be too easy. No, he'd hurt Daryl, or dad or anyone from back home. Just to teach me a lesson.
Seeing as I'd listened, he turned back to Carl. "Two men. Punishment. Do you really want to piss me off?"
Carl looked from the brute to me, our eyes locking. There was question there. He hadn't missed what Negan had said. But there was also fear. He'd never had the bandage off.
I'd seen the wound. Of course I'd seen it.
To be honest, it made me feel sad because it brought memories back. Memories of that day and everything that had happened, all the people we'd lost. But the would itself didn't freak me out or anything. It had at first, but after all the times I'd gone with him to get the bandage changed, I guess I was just used to it by now.
Offering him an encouraging nod, I held my breath as he began. With a heavy sigh, he brought has hands up he took his hat off and handed it over to me before he got started on the bandages.
Negan chuckled. "Almost there."
I looked over at him, seeing excitement in his eyes as he watched my brother.
Carl kept unwrapped the bandaged from around his head, going around and around the few times it had been wrapped. With Denise gone, I usually handled his bandaging now, but the day I'd let home was the day it had to be changed again, so someone else must have done it- I knew I hadn't.
With the bandage now off, Carl kept looking down at the ground as his hair covered his eye. He was ashamed. I could feel it.
"Get that hair out of your face," Negan told him, no longer chuckling. "Let me see."
Once again, Carl did as he was told as he lifted his hand and pulled his hair back and away from his face, revealing the wound. He looked up, meeting Negan's eyes, even though I knew he didn't want to.
"Christ! That is disgusting. No wonder you cover that up." Negan leaned forward to get a better look. "Have you seen it? I mean, have you looked in the mirror?"
My attention was focused on my brother. Negan's words were pissing me off, but they were upsetting Carl more, which was more important to me.
"That is gross as hell. I can see your socket," Negan chuckled. "I want to touch it. Oh, come on. Can I touch it?"
He'd just crossed a line.
Getting to my feet, I moved to kneel in front of Carl. "Ignore him, okay. Just look at me." I smiled kindly at my brother, bringing my hand up to cup his cheek. When his eye met mine, I gave a gentle nod. "See, it's fine. You're fine."
His eye stayed locked on to mine as I refused to look away from him.
I needed him to see someone look at him no differently than they always had. Carl was my baby brother. He may be bigger, and badder, but he was still my baby brother and I would always love and protect him. His eye didn't change that, just like my scars didn't change his thoughts on me.
Negan sighed. "Damn. Holy hell, kid. Look... I just- It's easy to forget that you're just a kid."
Carl sniffled as he kept looking down at me.
I smiled up at him still. "I'm here. I'm here," I reassured him.
"I didn't mean to hurt your feelings or anything."
I looked over my shoulder at Negan. "Well, you did."
He just sighed again, "I... I was just screwing around."
I was about to say something else, to tell Negan off for being such an asshole. But before I could, Carl spoke first.
"Just forget it."
I thought he'd been talking to me, but when I looked to him again, I could see he'd actually been talking to Negan. Pulling himself together, he nodded to me, letting me know he was okay.
A knock had all three of us turn to the door.
"Come in," Negan called.
The door opened, the larger guy from by the truck earlier walked in, holding Lucille. "I'm sorry to interrupt, sir, but, uh you left Lucille out by the truck."
I stood and turned to look at Negan, seeing him as surprised as I was. The way he talked about Lucille and treated her, I was shocked to find out he'd simply left her somewhere...
"Seriously?" Negan shook his head. "I never do that. I guess a kid firing a machine gun and a chick beating the shit out of Dwight is a little bit of a distraction." He shrugged, turning to look at Carl. "All jokes aside, you look rad as hell. I wouldn't cover that shit up. It may not be a hit with the ladies, but I swear to you, no one is gonna screw with you looking like that. No, sir."
Suddenly I wasn't too sure how I was supposed to feel, which seemed to be a common occurrence when it came to Negan. Sure, he'd just upset my brother and almost made him cry. But he was making up for it now... It made me want to hate and like him. Most of the things he did- besides all the violence- made me want to like and hate him.
Looking to his man again, Negan spoke, "Fat Joseph, did you carry her all the way up here for me?"
Joseph smiled. "Yes, sir."
Negan nodded, reaching out his hand. Joseph act right away, handing Lucille over. Negan looked to her, before turning his attention to his man again. "Were you gentle? Were you kind?" Joseph looked a little lost for words at his boss's questions. "Did you treat her like a lady?"
"Mm... yes." Joseph nodded, though I could tell he'd only said yes because he was scared of what would happen if he said no. "Yes, sir."
Negan looked thoughtful before he asked his next question. "Did you pet her little pussy like a lady?"
"Oh, my God," I groaned, rolling my eyes as I moved to sit in my seat again, dropping onto the cushioned chair.
Negan chuckled, as he looked to me. "I'm just screwing around." He turned to Joseph again. "A baseball bat doesn't have a pussy."
Instant relief washed over Joseph's face as he began to laugh- which was not the most attractive laugh I'd heard or seen...
After a moment, Negan gestured to the door with Lucille. "Get the hell out."
Joseph was gone in a matter of seconds, without saying a single word as he left. He hadn't even glanced at Carl or myself the whole time he'd been in the room.
The moment the door closed, Negan's attention was back on my brother and I. "Now, you see? That's what I'm talking about. Men breaking each other's balls. This is the shit your dads supposed to be teaching you."
I guess that was true. It was like in movies, where the dad and son go fishing and camping or whatever. The dad's supposed to teach the son how to be a man. But with the end of the world and a bunch of people to lead and a baby to take care of, dad just didn't seem to have a lot of time for Carl- or myself, but I could deal.
Sighing, Negan leaned back against the lounge. "What do you like to do for fun, kid? You like music?" He nodded. "I want you to sing me a song."
Carl looked just as confused as I felt as he spoke. "What?"
"Yeah." Negan shrugged. "You mowed down two of my men with a machine gun. I want something in return for that. Sing me a song."
"I..." Carl looked to the ground. "I- I can't think of any."
"Bullshit! What'd your mum used to sing you? What'd your dad play in the car?" Negan got to his feet, pointing Lucille at Carl. "Start. Singing," he ordered, moving over to an open space of the room as he waited.
I glared at Negan as I got up from my seat again. He turned to me and watched as I knelt in front of Carl. There was no way I was making him do this on his own.
"Hey." I offered another kind smile. "You remember that song we used to sing with mum? It was her favourite. We used to sing it in the garden, in the car, all the time. You remember?" I asked, keeping my voice low so only he could hear.
Thinking about mum hurt, but actually mentioning her was torture. I'd lost a piece of me the day she'd died, and I would never get it back. But Carl? He'd lost more than a piece of himself. That was the day he'd lost his childhood and innocence. That was the day he'd killed his first person...
"I'm waiting," Negan noted impatiently.
"You can wait a little longer," I told him, not caring about my attitude.
He chuckled lightly but said nothing more.
"You remember it, right?" I asked Carl, my smile back in place.
He nodded. "Yeah... yeah I think so."
"Great. We'll sing it together," I told him, before I started and by the fourth word, he joined in.
"You are my sunshine"
"Go on," Negan called.
"My only sunshine
You make me happy
When skies are grey"
Negan grunted and Carl flinched. I could see Negan in the corner of my eye as he pretended to bash someone's skull in with Lucille. I chose to ignore it, but Carl's nerves and fears got the better of him as he stopped singing.
Negan shook his head. "Do not let me distract you, young man."
Tugging on Carl's hand, I grabbed his attention. "Sing with me." I smiled at him, trying to ease his mind.
"You'll never know dear"
Negan continued to grunt as he swung Lucille. But I simply cupped Carl's cheek and kept my eyes locked on to his as we sung together.
"How much I love you"
It was emotional. I could feel myself tearing up as I thought of all the times we'd sung the song with mum. It was the song she'd sing when we were sad, or sick, or simply needed a pick-me-up.
I could remember her holding me in her arms as we sat on the rocking chair out the back by the flower bed. She would sing the song in my ear and stroke my hair, rocking us gently. I'd lost my pet fish that day, but it felt like I'd lost my best friend. So mum stayed with me as I cried, soothing my pain. She always knew how to make us feel better…
"So please don't take my Sunshine away..."
I couldn't go on. Closing my eyes, I felt a tear slip and roll down my cheek as my heart ached at the memories.
CPOV
I looked down at Vickie as we finished singing. She'd always had a nice voice. I'd teased her back at the prison. I'd always told her she should sing with Beth. But she'd been too nervous. I never understood why though. Her voice was so pretty.
Looking down at her now, I suddenly felt bad. I'd put her in this situation. If I had just stayed home, she wouldn't be kneeling on Negan's bedroom floor as tears rolled down her cheeks.
Oblivious to my sister, Negan moved to sit on the coffee table. "That's pretty good. Lucille loves being sung to. It's about the only thing she loves more than bashing in brains. Weird, huh?" he chuckled.
I didn't look up at him. I didn't even care about him right now. All the anger I felt washed away as I looked down at Vickie.
I'd been waiting for her to shut down. I'd been waiting for her to fall apart ever since we'd lost Glenn and Abraham. I'd been waiting for her to go numb like she usually did. But it had never come. It was as if she'd been shutting everything and everyone out. Singing the song, I guess it let all her feelings back in.
Negan sighed as if he just realised something. "Did your mother sing that to you? Where is she now?"
Staying strong for Vickie, I looked to Negan. Without saying a word, I made it clear what had happened with a single look.
"Damn." He shook his head. "Dead, huh? You see it happen?"
I tensed at the memory of that day. "I shot her before it could..."
"Damn, no wonder you're a little serial killer in the making," he chuckled lightly.
That was the last straw, I guess, because at that moment Vickie was up on her feet. I went to follow, seeing her look to the door, but I stopped when Negan stood as well, grabbing her arm.
She froze. I froze. Neither one of us liked him touching her, but we also didn't know what to do. We weren't sure if there was anything we could do.
"Kid, why don't you go wait outside while your sister and I have a little chat?" Negan said without even giving me a glance.
I didn't move. I didn't want to leave Vickie alone with this monster. If I left, I could protect her. If I left, I wouldn't know what was happening. He could do anything to her. I'd rather die than-
Negan's spoke up, cutting off my train of thought. "It wasn't a question kid."
Taking a deep breath, keeping her eyes on the ground, Vickie nodded. "Go, Carl."
Getting to my feet, I moved to stand next to Vickie, resting a hand on her shoulder and squeezing ever so slightly to let her know I was there, before I turned for the door and left. It wasn't something I liked or wanted, but it was something I had to do.
Bamby