Title: The Boy Who Survived

Writer: Azure K Mello

Part:12/?

Pairing: Draco/Harry

Overall plot: what does it take to make Harry trust his stalker?

Segment plot: Draco talks to Severus.

Disclaimer: please don't sue me. I have no money and I don't pretend to own these things.

Warning: angst.

I leave you inside my room and hope that you'll calm down. Maybe you can sleep a bit because even though you slept earlier it wasn't very restive. Downstairs I see Severus staring out the window. "You aren't allowed to be upset."

"What?" He turns from the window and looks genuinely disturbed.

"You aren't allowed to be upset. You're not allowed to say anything. You aren't allowed to tell anyone. You aren't allowed to do anything. There is nothing you are allowed to do."

"Dragon, I-"

"No, you don't get to speak right now. You're still playing at espionage, sneaking into rooms? I understand that it's ingrained in you but if you wanted to know what happened this morning you should have asked. I would have lied, told you we went shopping but that is hardly the point. I asked you to be our alibi, you knew we were doing something and you didn't ask beforehand. So it wasn't that you were uncomfortable with our actions or protecting us: Kingsley was leaving. You were just being nosy. So now you know and now that you've found out you can go fuck yourself and keep your mouth shut."

"Draco!"

"No. You also aren't allowed to be offended or to tell me to be quiet. Right now I'm too disgusted to care about anything you want to say except, 'Yes, Dragon, I won't say anything to anyone. I won't even speak to your father.'"

"I won't say anything to anyone not even your father."

"Good. I'm sorry to say this but I can't even look at you. I'm going upstairs." I start to head back up the stairs.

"You knew; you saw."

"Anyone without their heads up their arses could have seen it if they were looking. It's not my fault that you can't see anything but his father when you look at him… I have never seen you as either a spy or as a professor but today I can't see you as being anything but those things because you sure as hell aren't my uncle Rus."

"I'm sorry."

"You should be and not because of how I feel but because of what you've done." I head back upstairs and open my door to see you with Maphaltha on your chest and instantly change my demeanor. "Ah, you've met Maphaltha."

"I didn't know you had a cat."

"You can only have an owl or a cat or a frog. Mercury seemed more useful. Besides, cats make you look softer. But it was a bit of a wrench to leave her when I came. She was only a year old when we came to school." I sit down next to you but you don't look away from her.

"Poor… Mathaltha?"

"Maphaltha," I correct gently and then after a pause ask, "Are you okay?"

"She's fine," You give a dry laugh.

"He's not going to say anything to anyone." You turn and look at me and I know it's not good enough. "Blaise is really good with memory charms; he can wipe anything without even knowing what it is he just needs a time frame."

You look up at the ceiling, "That's unthinkable."

"Not at all, I'm thinking it right now." You laugh again and it almost sounds like you're throat is lined with paper. "It's a little questionable, sure, but-"

"We can't fuck with his memory just because he found out about me."

"He was spying."

"Draco, you've heard the expression 'two wrongs don't make a right' right?"

"Yes."

"And that 'an eye for an eye leaves everyone blind'?"

"I'm pretty sure that in this case we'd be left with sight."

"Just lie here with me. Okay?" You reach for my hand and drag me down.

"Are we talking or is this silent lying?"

"Lying by omission?" You joke and then sober, "You can talk; I don't mind. I might not be the best conversationalist today."

"Then just listen, interrupt if you like. The Evening Prophet will have you all over the front page, you're in a fight with Ron and Hermione, we will be at separate tables in the dining hall, and Severus will be there."

"Are you trying to make me feel worse? I was thinking how hungry I was." Your voice is jovial but your grip is too tight.

"Or we get out for the weekend. Get McGonagall and Severus to sign a leave sheet for each of us, get a hamper from the kitchen house elves, and we go and stay with Remus until Monday morning… maybe longer, we're done with class until after Christmas… when was the full moon?"

"Nine days ago."

"It won't solve anything it's just a reprieve."

"A stay of execution?"

"What's that?" I wonder if you dislike that I don't understand your references, if you see it as a lacking on my part.

"Some countries have the death penalty for crimes. The court sentences you to death. But sometimes they'll find new information and they'll put off the execution for a while."

Well that's… disturbing. It doesn't make much sense. Even the Death Eaters were imprisoned, not killed. "Does England? I mean, the Muggles, do they have that?"

"I don't think it'd any worse than a dementor's kiss. But, no, England doesn't have it. I've seen it in American police shows."

"Plays?"

"No, shows on telly."

"Telly?" Sometimes it feels like a different language.

"A television it's this thing that has sort of plays on it… you'd like it. It's bad if you watch too much, I mean lots of people don't read they just watch TV."

"TV?" I repeat, unsure if we've moved to another subject.

"Television, TV, telly, idiot-box, the box, there are a lot of names. It's like a screen with moving pictures and sound. You'd like it."

"So does it make the stories? Do you programme it?"

"No, people make the shows, it's a whole business. And then it gets beamed… or sent… or something to your TV and you can choose between channels all of which have different shows."

"But how does it work? How does it beam?"

"I don't know."

"But you had one?" I ask and you sort of scrunch your face and I wonder if I've said something wrong.

"No, Dudley had a couple… it's a bit like Fizzing Whizbees. You don't really question how they make you float, it just makes sense that they do. You take it for granted."

"Is it weird for you that you can walk between two worlds?"

You remain silent for a while and you look back at the ceiling, as though my stars will answer for you. Finally you say, "I don't feel like I fit in either."

"I'm sorry," I say and I don't know if you'll believe it.

But you give me a tight smile and say, "I'm going to buy you a TV for Christmas."

"We could go actual Christmas shopping."

"I don't want to go to Diagon Alley this weekend not after everyone gets their copy of the Prophet."

"We can explore the Muggle London… it could be fun or at least distracting."

"Draco, you don't like Muggles and you must have stuff to do."

"I don't care about 'stuff' do you want to get out of here?"

"Yes please, but I mean, Draco-"

"Look, at some point we all need someone to help us and cover for us. And someday I'm going to need you to put me first. So this weekend we go to stay at Remus' and you show me London."

"We have to get off the bed if we want to do this."

"That is a drawback." I nod unsure of whether or not you're saying no.

"Okay, okay." You take a deep breath and then call out, "Dobby!"

The house elf suddenly appears at the end of the bed. "Harry Potter and Master Draco! Hello, Dobby is pleased to see you both together. What can Dobby do to be of help?" Dobby has always been so kind to me although he was terrified of my mother and frightened of my father's anger when he got careless with his affections. If Dobby was overly familiar with me in front of anyone my father punished him to remind him that if my mother saw it would be worse.

"I need your help getting two leave permission slips and my invisibility cloak. We're going to stay with Remus. Would you do that for me, please?"

"Of course, Harry Potter. And, Harry Potter, Dobby would like to say how sorry he is to hear about your family. Though they were horrible people."

"Thank you, Dobby."

"Dobby will be back soon." He disappeared.

"Good old Dobby. He was always kind." I realize that I'm repeating my internal monologue out loud and it's such a relief to have you next to me, to be able to say all these things. "He always had good bedtime stories. And he could darn anything so well my mother never saw the hole which really saved my arse several times." You lie next to me not laughing and I ask, "You okay?"

"Maphaltha is fine."

"That was funnier the first time."

"I'm not okay… Do you have floo powder?"

"Yeah it's on the mantle… you could floo into your common room but you don't know who'll be there."

"No, I just need to call Remus, ask if it would be alright if we came." You don't move to get off the bed, you just run your free hand through your hair repetitively and after a few more minutes you say, "When I've called Remus, and Dobby brings back the cloak and the forms, can we have sex? Or is this a no sex zone? Last night was amazing, and you made me feel so good, and I want to feel good like that again."

I don't know exactly what to say but Dobby saves me by reappearing. He brings the forms, already signed, a few changes of clothes, the cloak, and a plate with cake on it. "Harry Potter is there anything else Dobby can do?"

You look lost and look around, again like my room will answer you. "We need a hamper. Right?" You turn to me.

"Right, three days worth of food for three people, we don't want to impose of Remus."

"Yes, Master Draco, Dobby will be back in a few minutes."

"Thank you, Dobby, very much." He disappeared and I said, "We should maybe call Kingsley as well. Let him know that we're leaving."

"Good idea." You finally let go of my hand and move Maphaltha off of you. "I'll do it." You say before taking a large bit of fruit cake and moving to the fire. You take the tin off the mantel place and throw a pinch into the flames.

I don't listen to your conversations; I don't feel comfortable listening in on it. I pick up a book on my bed that you must have been reading. Good book, the maid did it you know. Everyone thought she was a squib but it turns out she's actually very powerful and is secretly his cousin and the next in line to inherit the family fortune. Dobby comes back with food and says, "Master Draco, I hope all is well."

"It will be fine. But it's not right now." And Dobby climbs on the bed and puts an arm around my shoulder. "Thank you." I lean into him slightly. I can't lean into you right now, it wouldn't be fair.

You turn back from the fire and see us in the half embrace and your eyes widen slightly. "Remus said we can go anytime we like… I didn't think you two were very close."

"Dobby raised me."

"But you're mean to each other."

"The Mistress did not like that Dobby and Master Draco were friends." Dobby strokes my shoulder a few times. "Dobby should be going, sirs. It was very nice to see you both."

"Thanks for everything, Dobby," I say and he nods, bows deeply, and disappears. "Dear Dobby." You start to strip and I say, "Harry, there's Postman Pat sheets on my bed." It's all the explanation I need and you nod understandingly.

"Right, but can we just get naked and get into bed. No sex, just sleeping skin to skin? I'm exhausted and stressed out."

I pull my robes open and say, "That sounds really good."

As you strip you look me over you say, "Do you have muggle clothes? Jeans or anything?"

"No, but I'm good at transfiguration. You can help me make it look right." You come to me naked and unashamed, almost unaware of yourself. The puppy and dragon are actually already asleep on your abdomen in a pile. I pull off my shoes, trousers, and pants as you pull the duvet back. I climb in next to you and pull the covers over us and you move nearer. Your stomach vibrates steadily. "Is your tattoo snoring?"

"The dog does. The dragon kicks it a lot. Will the puppy grow up?"

"Only if you will it too, otherwise it's just a puppy." I stroke your shoulder and feel you flaccid against my thigh and I ask, "Does it hurt?"

"No, it feels good, feels comforting… are you mad at me for lying to Kingsley?"

"He wouldn't have believed anything else. Get some sleep."

"Draco?"

"Yes?"

"I love you."

"I love you, too."

"I like being here with you. I like having you against me like this. I like being like this with you." You go quiet and I think that you expect a response but then you say, "It's been a hard time, and I'm sorry that I'm dragging you into this. And it's been a horrific twenty-four hours. But I'm glad you're with me here."

"Harry, you've had a hard time since you were a year old. And as for dragging me into it… I was stalking you for a long time so you didn't drag me into anything because I was a pretty observant stalker."

"You were a good stalker."

"Meaning I was efficient or meaning-"

You laugh gently and interrupt me, "I resented the hell out of you… but I needed you."

"You still need me?"

"Not that way. I don't need to you to watch me to remind me that I'm still living. I don't need you to shadow me or know my every movement. But I want you here with me. I still need you to see me as me."

It is warm and quiet and a man and woman are laughing close by. The woman breaks off with a snort and says, "James, we'll wake him." Her voice is happy and confidential.

The man moves into my eye line and smiles, "He's already awake." He scoops me up, I'm tiny in his arms, and he says, "Who did Mummy and Daddy wake? Who was good and quiet? You were, Harry."

I realize that this is a dream, your dream, and that these are your parents. Your father holds me close and says, "Let's see about a bottle."

"Oh, one for us too!" says your mother, with laughter in her voice.

"Red or white?" asks your father.

"Red, it will go with the stakes I should already be cooking."

"Forget stakes, we'll warm up those sausages and have crisps." He sets about warming a bottle, pours two glasses wine, and opens the larder all one handed. A noise came from outside and your father tenses. "What was that?"

I wake up suddenly and you say softly, "Sorry about that."

"You get two wizards who are both skilled in Occlumens and Legilimens sleeping skin to skin and there is going to be some slips. It was a nice dream."

You shake your head. "Not a dream." You take a deep breath and say, "The dementors they take all that's good… I always hear the end when they're near."

"The end?"

"The noise in the yard… it's Voldemort. When the dementors are near I hear that but I sort of pushed at it and fell into the rest of it… I don't know if it's real or if I made it up. I like to think it's real. I like to think they were talking about what to have for tea and laughing before... well, just before, I guess."

"They were nice and happy."

"Yeah, yeah, I like to think so."

"Do you have anything of theirs?"

"My dad's cloak, a map of the school that he made with his friends, and a photo album."

"No other memories?"

"No… I saw something in a Pensieve once that I shouldn't have; wished I hadn't."

"What do you mean?"

"I wasn't meant to see it and I found out that my dad was a bully when he was a kid. He was a mean bully… every bit the arrogant prick Snape claims he was."

"I'm sorry."

"Teenage boys can be prats, we mostly grow out of it. I'm sure he did… or would have, you know? He was only twenty so maybe he hadn't yet… but I don't think Mum would have married him if he was like that."

"Have I grown out of it?"

"Nope, you're a dick that's why I'm naked in your bed and talking openly about my parents." You laugh and the noise is actually relaxed and it's amazing but I feel like tons of pressure have been removed from us both.

"We should get up and go to Remus'; we'll have tea."