Have you ever seen somebody's eyes dim? I thought I had whenever Ran was sad. Once, I had contacted Ran over the phone as Shinichi with Professor Agasa's obento fax machine in the bathroom. When I came out, Ran had looked so crestfallen.

"Cases, cases!" Was what she angrily repeated after my call. As Conan, the only thing I could do was meekly ask if my older alter ego had upset her once again. She'd calm down and give me that horridly sullen look in her eyes. I always felt so guilty.

It was almost unbearable.

But today…today when I lied to Haibara—as soon as I turned around, I wanted to seize my tongue and cut it off on the spot. She didn't know that, of course. Apparently, some of mother's magnificent acting skills rubbed off on me.

When I walked out the door, I didn't head towards the creamery like I had told Haibara. Instead, I took a walk in the park to bury myself in my guilt. The date with Ran was a lie. I never told Ran. Never. Every time I tried, I pulled out at the last second like the coward I was. Haibara was right. I am an idiot.

Damn it. I'm just a lying coward. How could someone like me possibly take down the Black Organization? She was right to call me a fool.

Just when I thought my confidence had hit rock bottom, I returned home only to find a mess of photos surrounding a crying girl. Like the cowardly boy I was, I just stood near the door. I didn't make a move to comfort her.

When she calmed down, she stared at me. I can't even begin to describe the blank feeling her eyes gave me. Somehow I found my voice and asked her what was wrong.

She told me everything was. When I asked her to elaborate further, I found out one of my most trusted friends was part of the Black Organization.

At first, I refused to believe it. In fact, I went as far as accusing her of lying. Haibara snapped to attention as if I had slapped her. She looked like she wanted to slap me.

I couldn't blame her.

Through a tightly strained jaw, she asked me to look through the photos and see for myself.

Did I mention that I was also a proud coward? I didn't take back my words after looking through the photographs. Not even after she explained Project Theriac to me. What I did was yell at her, asking how she could lie about something like this. I refused to acknowledge Professor Agasa's connection to Project Theriac.

I was acting irrational. It was unacceptable.

I would bet my detective career that Haibara had never been more hurt than now. Her shoulders trembled as she glared at me silently. Like the idiot I was, I yelled even louder, demanding an explanation, not wanting to realize for even a second that she may be right and all I had to do was ask nicely for her to explain.

She shook her head, telling me to forget it and grabbed a few of the items in the suitcase.

I made a horrible mistake and told her not to steal any of Professor Agasa's belongings. I wish I had cut off my tongue a few seconds sooner. Realizing I had gone too far, I opened my mouth to apologize, but Haibara was already climbing down the steps. I ran after her, grabbing her hand, and I was about to tell her I was sorry.

In a shameful moment of silence, I hesitated.

In one smooth movement, she turned and slapped me across the face then went skating the rest of the way out the door.

I couldn't believe it. I never thought she would do something like this. I always thought she would be by my side, helping me as I took down the Black Organization. Naïve as I was, I didn't think words—even ones as cruel as mine—would hurt Haibara.

Didn't I once promise to protect Haibara as long as I lived? Who am I kidding? I did the exact opposite of that. I sunk down against the wall. I buried my head in my hands, wishing I could turn back the hands of time for my grave miscalculations.

My throbbing cheek quickly reminded me what I had to do. There was no time for my dramatics. I grabbed my skateboard and was out the door, running on turbo. That stuff was faster than NOX. I never actually tested its maximum speed, but I figured now was as good a time as any. I had been depending on an ex-member of the organization all along.

Of course, Haibara was an ex-member as well, but it was different with Professor Agasa. He never told us. And I never found out.

Weaving amongst traffic, I activated the radar on my glasses and found Haibara. I placed the tracker on her when I grabbed her hand. For that, guilt stabbed me, but I quickly shoved it away into my very own Pandora's Box. It's not like I could've tracked her down using the Detective Boys' badges. She was never given one.

Haibara was moving fast. Almost as fast as I was, in fact. No doubt if it was an Agasa invention, the skates were a modified version of my skateboard. How the skates worked I had no idea, but I intended to ask Haibara herself.

At last, she stopped somewhere. Instead of slowing down, I sped up to her location. As I rounded the corner, I entered a maze of alleyways. I slowed my board to a low hum when I reached the area deep inside. According to my radar, she had to either be right under me or…above?

I glanced up, and sure enough Haibara was standing on a rusted fire escape above me. I would've been relieved to see her, except for the fact that she was aiming a gun at me.

Shit.

When did she have time to get something like that? The chances of picking up something like that on the ground were very low. She couldn't have had more than a few seconds to search for it before I arrived. In any case, my first priority was to avoid getting shot. My second was to haul her ass back home.

Heh, back home together. What an appealing thought. But this was hardly the time for daydreaming.

I barely made a move before she cocked the gun. She smiled at my frozen expression and told me in her usual soft voice that she would not hesitate to shoot me on one condition.

She wanted me to forget she ever existed and leave her alone.

Forget Haibara? As if that would ever happen. I rejected her offer without missing a beat.

The bullet ricocheted off the wall beside me. In that moment, the needle from my watch hit her neck, and her unconscious form slumped over the railing. Unfortunately, she was dangling too far over and fell. I lunged from the cloud of dust that surrounded me, possibly from the bullet, but tripped. Thankfully, I broke her fall anyway when she landed on my back.

But, damn, did that hurt. I am definitely not making it a hobby to catch falling girls. Contrary to popular belief, they are not as light as we males imagine them to be.

Later, I would realize that the bullet Haibara shot at me was actually a hardened capsule that would shatter on impact after it was fired. I would also discover that the cloud of dust was not dust but a powdered version of my needles contained inside the capsule.

Right now, I would fall asleep on the ground with an equally drowsy Haibara using me as her pillow.

My last thought as I drifted off to sleep was that Sherlock Holmes would have handled this situation much better than I had. I was nothing compared to him. I was just…

…Just an incompetent tool.

It's a funny thing to wake up next to a girl in an alleyway. Well, maybe not quite so funny as it is heart-wrenching. How did it come to this? I felt so drained and defeated. There was something terribly wrong happening underfoot, and I swore to find out what.

With my scrawny pubescent arms, I lifted Haibara from where she lay and set positioned her safely on my skateboard. I sat behind her. If I had been a few years older, my hormones would be raging. Any of Haibara's miniscule movements had me highly aware of the fact she was sleeping in between my legs. Goddamn it, she was se—stunning.

My cheeks were probably glowing in the dark like neon rave sticks.

I could barely recall which turns I took in this alleyway labyrinth. Then again, I wasn't in a hurry either. Night was settling in, and it was difficult to see. Right, like that was supposed to be my excuse. With one arm wrapped securely around Haibara's sleeping form, I used my foot to gently push down the acceleration button on my skateboard. It's a good thing there turns here weren't sharp. I could lean into them without tipping us over.

If Haibara woke up, I knew I would have Hell to pay for this compromising position. Oh, well.

Que Sera, Sera.

My mind involuntarily drifted to today's events. Everything happened so quickly, I could only react. There was barely time to think. Did I mention that guilt and I were now joined to the hip? I recalled the harsh words as I snapped at her. It hollowed out my chest cavity faster than watermelon set in front of a hungry kid.

Did I deserve to bring her back?

Narrowing my eyes into slits, I left that question unanswered.

A/N: So…yeah. Hi. It's been a long time, hasn't it? Incidentally, I had to read my work over again just to recall the plot. It was a long and painful read, let me tell you that. Reevaluating past works has never been my strong point. I suppose I'm too critical of myself, but that's how it is. This story seemed so immature. The voice in my writing completely slaughtered me. Haha, forgive me for what I've put you readers through. I'll try to remedy that from now on.

But most importantly, thank you. Thank you so much for your support.