Just over a week later, Madge was sitting in her room, going through her clothes. She had received over ten new gowns from the king in less than ten days. She had too many necklaces to count, and she had even received a new riding habit from the King, which he had insisted she wear the next morning, when they were to go riding.
She hadn't seen William since their incident in the hall. He had become a professional at avoiding her and she found herself often missing his company, his touch, and his voice. She thought of him many times a day, mostly when she was with the King and she missed him most. When she would return to her room in the mornings, she wished that he was there to take her into his arms and comfort her, but he wasn't and he may never be again.
She sighed and continued to examine her new gowns, taking in all the fine detailing. The dresses were worthy of a princess or even a queen, not of her. She had to admit she felt complimented by the gifts and did like them a lot, but she would have been happy with or without gifts if she were with William because he made her happy on his own.
Out of nowhere, her door creaked open a tad and Madge looked curiously to it from her bed. Was someone spying on her? She would have bet it was Nan, spying for Anne to see if she was in her room, or in the king's. She stood up and walked quietly over to the door opening it wide and looking straight into the face of the perpetrator.
"Will?" She said once she realized she was most definitely not looking at Nan. "What on earth are you doing?"
Will stood just in front of her, staring past her into the room. He then looked down at her. "Can we talk?"
Madge looked down the hall both ways and then sighed. "Yes, but you should come in, quickly." She stepped back to allow him to pass her and then she followed, closing the door tightly behind her.
Will stood in the middle of Madge's room looking around. Madge took a few more steps into the room and looked at him, an eyebrow raised.
"Well if you want to talk, let's talk then." She said. Her voice still sounded angry but she couldn't help it. She was feeling alone, as she was sure he was too. Part of her wanted to yell at him and the other part wanted to apologize over and over and then kiss him and hug him till he could not hold back any longer.
Will looked at the ground for a few more seconds before looking up to her with eyes so sad she could see the hurt in them. Again, she felt the urge to apologize, but she resisted. She wanted to hear what he would say first. "You know, you hurt me a lot."
She looked up to his eyes. "I know, but it wasn't my fault… you know I don't have any choice over what I do. My family, or more so, my uncle, controls my life. If I had objected to his offer that day I would have been shipped off to a nunnery and we would have never seen each other again! Personally, I thought this was the better option, but you can correct me if I'm wrong."
Will averted his eyes to the ground. Part of him was angry with her, but most of him knew she was right. She was not like him; she didn't have the gift of free will at her fingertips. Instead, she was merely a pawn in the game of chess that her parents and uncle played. They controlled her every moves and if she objected, she would be vanquished from the game in its entirety, taken right off the board. If she had objected like she had wished to do with all her heart, she would have been sent to a nunnery and gone suddenly missing from Will's life without explanation. He looked back up to her and took a few steps towards her. "You're not wrong." He said, weakly. He was still fighting a bit with the other side of his mind. He heaved a deep sigh and then again, took a few steps closer to her. They were now about an arms length apart. "I was being an idiot."
Madge opened her mouth a bit and then shook her head. "No, you weren't. I did hurt you; you were acting the way you should have. I wish I could have said no to my uncle, Will, but I couldn't have. This was my only reasonable option."
Will frowned a bit. He didn't find the plan of action very reasonable but he did not argue. "Well, then if I wasn't being an idiot, I at least over reacted… a lot and I'm sorry for that. I realize now that I shouldn't have run away from you when you told me. I should've stayed and helped you, helped both of us, get through it and that's why I'm here now. To apologize for my prior behavior and to fix things with us, so we can get back on track, where we left off." He smiled a little and took her hands in his. His warm hands immediately put a smile on Madge's face and she looked down at the ground, blushing a little.
"I forgive you for before, as long as you forgive me," she said, still looking at the ground.
"Are you kidding?" He asked, his smile growing. "Of course I forgive you and from now on, I'm going to help you too." He stroked her hair, looking at her longingly. It had been so long since the last time they had touched, truly touched. Madge returned his look of longing, smiling at him too. "Are you okay?" he asked, still stroking her head and hair.
The question he asked her was so simple, yet so deep, and confusing. Was she okay? Over the past little while she hadn't taken much time to really sit down and ask herself that question. Her thoughts had distracted mainly by the king. She hadn't had time to think of much else, and when she had, she had thought of William and her longing for him. "I don't know…" she answered honestly. "I haven't really thought about it."
William looked at her with concern. "You haven't had a moment to think about your own well-being?"
She shook her head, her lips pursed as she thought. "Not really."
He didn't even reply. He pulled her in, closer to him, and wrapped his arms around her body as tightly as he could, as he continued to stroke her hair. "Oh, my Margaret…" he said. The fact that he said her whole name took Madge by surprise, but she enjoyed it. No one had called her Margaret since she left home. "I should never have left you to do this on your own. Now you've lost yourself…"
Madge embraced Will back, but did not say a word. What does he mean you've lost yourself? I am still myself, certainly? Aren't I? Not even her conscience could answer that question. She buried her head in Will's shoulder. "Oh William… I need to put an end to this."