A/N: Well here we are.. daily postings.. are you ready? Gather blankies and your teddy bears and hold onto them tightly.. things are gonna get ugly! For those who asked for hand holding... gather round!
Thanks to mauigirl60 who whipped these suckers out! To Mandi and Missy..your love and support are the bread to my butter!
Disclaimer: I don't own Twiligut.. but we know this! ***WARNING! Abuse triggers ahead!*****
Ch 11
That night started a vicious cycle that boxed me in with no visible way out. You yelled that night and gripped my arm tightly as you expressed your fear that I would leave with him. When I reminded you that he was married with kids, it did nothing to sway you or your fear, so I backed down to placate your anger. In the morning when the dark bruises were displayed on my fair skin, you kissed them with reverence and tears in your eyes. You promised you would never hurt me again.
A few days later, when I forgot to pick up your dry cleaning, you called me a worthless bitch. I fell asleep on the couch as I was too scared to come to bed. I felt horrible for my forgetfulness. In the middle of the night, you woke me with kisses and carried me to bed where you spent the next hour worshipping my body. Your last words as you fell asleep were to ask for my forgiveness. I gave it in the dead of night.
A week later when I came home late from a study group, you accused me of abandoning you. There was an important work function that I forgot about and you had to go solo. I trembled as you told me about all the excuses you made for my absence. Your hands dug into my upper arm and when you shook me, I lost my balance and fell painfully into the end table. The next morning, you brought me breakfast in bed so I didn't have to walk.
Over and over the cycle repeated; peace, anger, lashing out, pain, and forgiveness. Your eyes told me you hated it, that you loved me and wanted things to be perfect between us. When we had peace, you showered me with your love and affection. I lived for those times. We laughed and made plans for the future. It was during those times you admitted I made you want to be a better man.
Then I began to notice the tension that leaked into the hours or days before you would lash out. It would poison the air, leaving me feeling sick to my stomach. I would try and stay out of your way, hopeful the tension would dissipate, but I always seemed to be in your way when you blew up. The tenderness and guilt you would display when you hurt me would wash away the bad memories. I was left with the warmth of your kisses on my skin and nothing else would matter.
A/N; And so the cycle of abuse has started! Do you hate 'HIM' yet? By the end of the week you will loathe him! This is the mildest of all the chapters this week! Leave me your love.. please! See ya tomorrow!