Italics are internal thought
Bold is Elven

Thank you to silentsum for editing this after I wanted to throw it out the window. And thank you to all my reviewers! Its so encouraging to hear that people are interested in how this all goes! It makes me so happy. (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

"We need to talk, Shae."

I froze at those words. Those were never good words to hear. I turned slowly to face Sean, apprehension making me tense. What was this about? Did he learn something about me?

I had been hiding along the battlements above the garden, occasionally watching the Dalish move about their makeshift camp below. They had been interesting to watch, sitting around a brazier like it was a campfire, working on various projects throughout the day. I remained out of view so they wouldn't know I watched them. I had to admit to some curiosity. I wish that I could talk with them about their culture, without having to return the favor.

I had spent the last several days avoiding them around Skyhold, and limiting myself to areas I knew they would not frequent. Today though, I had wandered up on the battlements to walk and had been drawn in watching them go about their day. The guards had been patrolling the wall behind me, so I hadn't paid any attention to the footsteps until Sean spoke.

"What do we need to talk about, Sean?" I kept my expression indifferent, against the flare of panic I felt at his words.

He studied me for a moment, tilting his head like a huge puppy. He glanced over the wall to see what I was looking at. At seeing the Dalish, he raised an eyebrow at me in silent question.

I shrugged, not willing to go into the complicated answer. After a moment of watching me, he shrugged as well, and sighed.

"The rift. What happened there. All of it."

I felt panic well up in my throat, but I shoved it back down. How did I not expect this? Stupid! You are going to need to do better than that if you are going to survive this Shae.

I cleared my throat slightly, and looked away. What could I tell him?

"Come on. Solas wanted to discuss this as well. He is the Fade expert after all. Probably understand more of this craziness than I ever would."

Sean rolled his eyes and turned, expecting me to follow. At his words I had gone a little pale. Solas. Shit! Think Shae! Come up with something.

I followed Sean slowly, not really paying much attention as I scoured my thoughts for a believable lie. What could I tell them? Say I don't remember? That feels like a lame excuse, plus I have used it too often. Besides, with my reaction after I woke up again? I was acting terrorized. No, I have to tell them something. I had a nightmare? Maybe I can tell them the truth, but spin it as my own memories? Like I'm actually Lethanavir. Should I tell them that? That's getting a little too specific.

I contemplated all my options as we walked, keeping my head down. Ok. Think. Worst case scenarios. They figure out the truth about me and kill me. Admittedly, that's not likely to happen. Second. They decide it's too dangerous to take me to rifts anymore, and I'm trapped here in Skyhold unable to help. That would be awful, but also manageable. Third would be that they decide that they will be careful in the future but keep sending me out, and Solas will probably want to keep me away from rifts. I suppose that would be the optimal situation here. But how can I make that happen?

I hadn't been paying attention to where we were, so I almost walked into Sean's back when we reached the rotunda. I peeked around his shoulders and saw Solas sitting at his desk, pouring over his papers and books, like usual. Sean cleared his throat, and Solas looked up from his desk.

"Ah, Inquisitor, I see you found her."

Sean nodded as he walked over to Solas' couch and dropped heavily on it. He reached his arms up and stretched languidly, joints popping as he groaned. Then he sighed and relaxed, draping his long limbs all over the couch. I couldn't help but smirk at him. I walked over and perched on the arm of the couch opposite him, so I wouldn't get in his way.

Solas watched us for a moment, his fingers steepled together as he waited. No one spoke for a moment. And then Sean broke the silence. He pulled his head off the back of the couch, and leaned forward. He looked tense, as though he didn't look forward to this conversation. He turned and faced me.

"We wanted to give you some time. You looked…"

There was an awkward pause as he struggled for words.

"What the Inquisitor is trying to say, is that we meant to give you some distance after what was obviously a trying experience, but we do need to know what happened in Crestwood, Shae."

I sighed and crossed my arms. What do I tell them?

After a few awkward moments of silence, I saw Sean give Solas a pleading look out of the corner of my eye.

"Well, I suppose I'll start from the beginning." I decided to preempt any more appeals from them. I could at least fill Sean in on the parts I had already told Solas, and hopefully by the time I got to the rift I would have thought of a plan.

They listened closely as I told them about arriving in Crestwood, and the pain starting almost imperceptibly and then growing as we got closer. I told them my assumptions about it just being a headache, and how Solas had later suggested it might be connected to the rift. I walked them quickly through the rest, since they knew about my headache after Caer Bronach. And then I reached the rift.

I paused. I don't know what to tell them.

I felt myself pale, and I clenched my fists. All these lies and now I'm drawing a blank?

Sean shifted uncomfortably beside me, and Solas just watched, studying my face too closely for comfort. They were waiting for me. Shit! I…

"You should tell them."

Cole. It's the one time I don't jump at his sudden appearance. Sean does. Violently. He is practically off the couch before he realizes it's just Cole and settles back down.

"Truth terrifies, trembles. It can't be. It wants to be truth. Nellas. Ma'Vhenan."

"Stop!" I don't know when I started trembling, but my hands are clenched and shaking. My knuckles white. The memory started flashing in my mind as he spoke and I had to stop him.

"That didn't help. That was wrong. Let me try again?"

I stared at my clenched fists. No one else in the room moved or spoke, but I could feel both Solas and Sean watching all of this closely. I felt nauseous. This was too much, but I didn't say no. Cole seemed to take encouragement from that. He moved towards me and leaned forward, almost whispering in my ear.

"You are still you. The vision speaks of a different truth. It wants to be known. They will not be afraid. Telling them will help."

He leaned back slightly, smiled from under his floppy hat, and then he vanished. I really need to clarify what 'in private' means. Of course, it's probably a part of his nature or something. I sighed.

Glancing up again, I saw both Sean and Solas still watching me closely. They heard the whole exchange and probably had theories floating around in their heads. Especially Solas who was too smart for his own good. Now I have to tell them the truth. Damn it, Cole.

"I… well… when you closed the rift Sean, I had a… memory. I remembered." I decided to try and pass them off as my own memories. Solidifies my story, right? This can't, in any way, go horribly wrong.

Solas stood and walked around his desk to stand closer, his hands together behind his back.

"And you are sure it was a memory? Could it have been a manifestation of the Fade?"

I considered it, but the memory was too real. It didn't have the fuzzy edges or the fluid movement that I had come to know in the Fade.

"Yes, I'm sure. It was vivid. Sharp. And it lacked adaptability."

Sean shifted, leaning forward with his chin cupped in his hands and elbow on his knees.

"What did you see?" He was obviously interested. A glance at Solas showed that he was curious as well.

I sighed again and rubbed at my forehead. How do I explain this?

"I saw…" I looked over Solas shoulder at the opposite wall, and my eyes lost their focus as they turned back to her. Lethanavir.

"Lethanavir? What's that mean?" Sean asked.

I bit my lip and looked at the floor. I hadn't realized I had spoken aloud. This whole thing is just going so well. Wonderful.

I hesitated, not making any eye contact with either of them.

"It's a name." I sighed heavily and pinched the bridge of my nose. "I remembered… the battle where I... died."

I swallowed heavily as it seemed like the words stuck in my throat. My gaze drifted to the wall behind Solas again, and I let the memory come to the forefront again. And yet I still lied.

"I was part of a company led by Lethanavir. We were on a field before Arlathan, preparing for battle. And then it started. I could see the fighting, thousands of people throwing themselves into the bloody conflict. Magic lit up the sky. I was shot."

My hand went up to touch the spots on my shirt that hid my scars.

"They were poisoned arrows, and we did not have an antidote, nor were the healers among us able to heal it without significant time. Time that we didn't have. I told them to leave me."

Sean leaned closer towards me, interested in the story.

"What happened?"

"Nel… One of my companions left the battle, carrying me out through an eluvian. That is where it ended."

I stared down at my hands. Why didn't I say his name?

"Wow." I glanced at Sean. He was shaking his head, his eyes unfocused as he considered my story. "That's fascinating. What's an eluvian? And what battle was this? Why were you fighting?"

"I believe I can answer a few of your questions here, Inquisitor."

I threw Solas a relieved glance, and resumed my staring contest with the floor.

I listened as Solas vaguely explained eluvians, and answered a few other questions. Some he waved off as lost knowledge.

"What did Cole say earlier? Nellas? Mavanan? Mavenen? What does that mean?"

Solas hesitated a moment, and then opened his mouth to speak, but I interrupted his comment.

"Nellas is the name of the companion who carried me away from the battle. And 'ma'vhenan' is an endearment. It means my heart."

My voice sounded detached and stiff. I tried to relax, shaking my head slightly to clear my thoughts.

"Oh." What an underwhelming response, Sean.

"Well, I would theorize that the memory came back to you through your direct interaction with the Fade. I believe that you may regain more of these memories if you continue to approach the rifts."

Solas spoke with his normal academic consideration. He moved back to his desk and sat down, once again steepling his fingers.

"If I continue?" I was hoping they wouldn't consider this option, but who am I kidding? I would consider this option if I was in their place.

Sean nodded, looking at me with his brow scrunched up in worry.

"You're a valuable asset in a fight, Shae. But you collapsed and were unconscious for several hours. It may not be safe to take you near rifts if this is going to be a regular thing. And since that's our primary goal when we go anywhere…" He let that thought speak for itself, and shrugged.

I couldn't help the scowl on my face. I understood that passing out would make me a huge liability, but I wasn't going to be happy about being left behind. Surprisingly, Solas was the one who jumped to suggest a compromise.

"What if we were to test this further? It could be that she only fell unconscious because she was unprepared for the memory to return. If she could be mentally prepared before facing a rift, it might lessen the effects."

I felt a glimmer of hope at those words. I never expected Solas to be the one to fight for me. And I was confident that he could convince Sean to let me continue, if that's what he thought was best.

"How would we test that, exactly?" Sean asked.

"Simple. We would travel to other rifts and see how she is affected. If it is something where she is able to remain conscious, I see no reason to prevent her from accompanying you on your excursions."

Sean looked a little flabbergasted. If I had to guess, I would say Solas is the one who pushed for this little intervention. And now Sean can't figure out why he suddenly switched to my side.

"But why? If it obviously causes her pain?"

Solas had the look of a disappointed teacher when a student doesn't understand the lesson. I nearly rolled my eyes as well.

"If she has an opportunity to regain some of her memories, I believe she should have the chance to do so. Unless you don't want to recover them?" Solas looked at me, his eyes looking for something in my expression, but I couldn't tell what.

I hesitated. Yes, I want to continue to help the Inquisition. But do I want to get more of these visions? I don't even know what they mean. I guess they are valuable. And this probably helps solidify my whole ancient elf story. I have things I can tell people if I really need to. I would rather not, but in worst case scenarios.

"I would like to try." I nodded to Solas, who smiled and we both turned to Sean. He looked back and forth between us for a moment, before meeting my eyes.

"You're sure about this? I don't want you to get hurt."

I smirked, and slid off the arm of the couch to sit next to him and put my hand on his arm.

"I appreciate the concern Sean. But I would always rather know the truth, than be left in the dark."

His lips quirked in an unsure smile, but he nodded.

"Alright. Well," He turned back to Solas. "What do you suggest then? I am going to the Western Approach in a few days to find the Grey Wardens. I wasn't going to bring you two this time. Besides I don't know that I would recommend it for that area. From the reports I have been receiving, it's pretty overrun with Venatori, and even darkspawn in areas." He rubbed the stubble on his chin as he considered.

"What of that elven temple we were discussing? The scroll you procured gave us some information on the area and we need to get some scouts out there. Let Shae and I go with them. We will help them map the area, and we will experiment with any rifts we encounter."

"Won't that be dangerous? I won't be there to close the rifts."

"I doubt we need to close them to trigger a memory. But if that is the case then we can just wait for you to join us later. The area indicated on the map is not too far from the Western Approach."

Sean groaned, as though he hated the idea.

"Those shards? I hate those things. Glowing through skulls and ringing in my ears. There is probably nothing out there you know."

Solas smirked at him.

"It is always worth investigating. Besides, there isn't much else for us to do while you are off galavanting through the Western Approach."

Sean eyed Solas speculatively.

"That's a lie, and you know it." He sighed. "Fine. But I want you to take…" He stared up into the tower for a moment, thinking about his options. "Iron Bull and Varric with you. I want you to have more support in case of any danger."

Solas nodded once to acknowledge his words. Sean leaned heavily back into the couch, relaxing for a moment as he yawned.

"Now I have to go talk to Dorian, Leliana, Bull, Varric, and Cullen." He seemed to be making a mental checklist for himself.

"How did your trip to the Hinterlands go?" I asked.

Sean glanced at me, and then his eyes darted up to where Dorian would be in the library. He glanced back at me and then looked away. I watched as a faint blush spread on his cheeks.

"Alright. Just got some things taken care of for Dorian. Not much happened."

I smirked. So he hadn't talked to Dorian yet about it? They did just get back last night. So I suppose it's now. The first kiss.

I wanted to sneak up into the library to spy on them. But that would be a little voyeuristic for my tastes. Maybe I could sit here and listen. Still kinda creepy, Shae.

Sean stood up from the couch and headed for the stairs, waving as he left. I leaned back on the couch, and threw an arm over my eyes. Telling that story had been surprisingly trying on my emotions.

I heard the soft rustle of fabric and approaching footsteps, and then the couch sinking slightly as his weight settled beside me.

"Shae, is there anything else?"

I moved my arm and turned my head to him. He was looking at me intently, his eyes filled with something I didn't understand. Solas was so hard to get a read on sometimes. Now was no different.

Should I tell him that I was Lethanavir in the memory? I stared back at him for a moment. No, I don't want to be associated with some leader from that time. Besides, I only saw it through her eyes. It's not like I have any insight into who she was.

I brushed aside my small doubts that lingered in my mind. The placement of the scars, her voice, her fighting. I shook my head.

"No, Solas. I will tell you if there is anything else."

He watched me for a moment longer, before nodding and standing up, wandering back to his desk.

"We should prepare for our trip soon. I know Scout Harding was planning on leaving for that area within a few days. Before the Inquisitor left for the Western Approach. You should prepare for travel. It will be a long journey."

I was packed and ready before I went to bed. We would be leaving in the morning. Harding and four other scouts, plus Iron Bull, Varric, Solas, and myself. It should be an interesting trip. Sean had designated Solas the leader of this little expedition, since it was mostly his idea anyway. And Solas had conferred with Harding, deciding they would leave two days after our little conversation in the rotunda. It was two more days of skirting the Dalish and hiding around Skyhold. I was ready to leave as soon as possible.

I was reading in bed, waiting to be tired enough to sleep, when I heard a knock at the door. I dropped my book on my chest, and felt great annoyance at whoever was knocking at this late hour. I got out of bed, grumbling all the while, and threw open the door. The scout on the other side was surprised and his eyes blew wide at my sudden appearance.

"What?"

He just stood there, staring. I crossed my arms, and stuck out a hip, remembering that I was just wearing that large sleeping shirt again. I sighed.

"Unless you are here for more pleasurable pursuits, which I would have to respectfully decline, I recommend you deliver your message and go."

The man sputtered for a moment, going very red in the face. He bowed shortly before me.

"Lady Montilyet asks that you meet with her tonight before you retire. She has important information to discuss with you before you leave in the morning."

And with that, the red faced man turned on his heel and walked stiffly down the hall away from me. I watched him go for a moment, before closing my door.

What does Josephine need so late? I suppose it wouldn't really work to meet her in the morning. We will be leaving first thing.

I groaned in irritation and gathered my clothes again. I pulled on my pants and traded the loose shirt for one more appropriate. Once presentable, I stepped out and found my way to Josephine's office. I pushed open the door and stepped inside to find three very tired looking advisors, and one exhausted and annoyed Sean.

I was surprised and immediately tense. What are they all doing in here so late? What does this have to do with me?

"This is stupid. We should just wait until they get back to go over all this political bullshit." Sean muttered. He ran a hand over his face. Cullen looked like he couldn't agree more, but Leliana's eyes flashed, and Josephine pursed her lips.

"Gentlemen, this is very important. And it gives us more time to prepare."

"Right, like she'll even agree to go." Sean turned his gaze to me.

"Is someone going to fill me in? Or are we just going to talk circles around me?"

Sean put his head in his hands, looking utterly defeated.

"You are going to hate it." He almost whined.

Josephine gave an exasperated sigh.

"You have heard about the circumstances with the peace talks between Empress Celene and Grand Duke Gaspard, yes? From the Inquisitors experience in Redcliff, we found out that Corypheus plans to assassinate Empress Celene and throw Orlais into chaos. We planned to attend the ball and stop that from happening, of course. We have already obtained invitations to accompany the Grand Duke." I was already shaking my head.

"You don't need me. Send someone more familiar with the politics and grandstanding. There are plenty of others who will do. I will not be a part of it."

All of them shifted uncomfortably, except Leliana, whose eyes were sparkling darkly in the shadows cast by her hood and the dancing fire.

"You may not have a choice." Leliana spoke sharply. "We received an invitation today, specifically requesting your presence as a guest of the Empress."

What?

What?

"What? Why?" I looked around at each of them in horror and saw varying degrees of pity.

Josephine sighed and shuffled some papers around on her desk.

"Empress Celene has always had a… strange relationship with the elves." I almost bristled at that. I remembered her relationships and what that meant. "She apparently heard that you were here, an elf from the time of Arlathan, and she is... interested in meeting you. And it would be very beneficial for the Inquisition to gain favor with the court."

I stared in shock at her. This whole thing was the worst idea ever. I should have told them I was a city elf, a mercenary, an isolationist who grew up speaking only elven. Anything else. This was becoming too tangled.

"No." Anger toned my voice, and I clenched my jaw so hard it hurt. I saw both Josephine and Leliana open their mouths to speak, but my hand slashed through the air to cut them off.

"No. I won't dance to your shemlen politics just because an Empress wants to meet the fascinating new elf." I turned to storm out, but then I whipped back, furious at the situation. "My story is not some commodity for you to sell for power and affluence! I am not a political pawn in your schemes. Leave me out of this!"

And with that, I quickly left the room.

Shit! This is a nightmare! They want me in that stupid ball? That's the worst idea they have ever had.

I moved through the hall and onto the steps leading outside before a hand caught my shoulder and pulled me to a stop. I turned to glare at Sean. He was looking a little sheepish, but he gestured me to the table where Varric usually sat, and I settled reluctantly across from him. Though I was still glaring fiercely.

"I'm sorry, Shae. We weren't trying to use you. Well, some of us weren't." He scowled a little at that. "I actually was trying to talk them out of it. Honestly, I don't think you would do well at court. Possibly even be detrimental to our cause. No offense."

I couldn't help the laugh that burst from me then. His saying that actually made me feel a little better about it all. But I still wasn't going.

"Josephine and Leliana seem convinced that refusing to attend would be a great insult. Which I am aware of. Growing up, I think the first lesson they taught us was that turning down an Empress was a huge blunder. But still. She invited you as an individual, not as part of the Inquisition. So you could turn her down, and it may not reflect poorly on the Inquisition. But it might. Those two," He jerked his thumb in the direction of Josephine's office, "are convinced that it would be the gravest insult and injure our chances of even getting into the ball, not to mention crippling us politically."

Sean was rambling at this point, so I held up a hand to stop him.

"Sean. I do not want to do this."

He sighed heavily.

"I know. Me either, honestly. You know the Orlesians are going to be fawning all over me, while insulting me behind my back where I can hear them. I hate parties." He glowered at the table, running his fingers over a knot in the grain.

I was silent for a while, just watching him. He was surprisingly patient while I thought about it.

There is nothing that makes me want to go to Halamshiral. Even in the games, that place was awful. Elves murdered in droves, Celene looking on as her palace is coated in blood, Gaspard getting drunk while his men fumble about to try and make a move, and Briala thinking she is above it all while she betrays her own people. Not to mention the insult of Halamshiral itself, taken from the elves along with the Dales. The Orlesians and their clever worded insults that were disguised as compliments. The whole thing was dripping corruption.

"Who were you planning on taking with you?"

Sean looked surprised at the sudden question. But then he got a sly smile on his face.

"Why? Do you have a specific request?"

I rolled my eyes, and then just glared at him pointedly. He groaned.

"Alright! I had really only decided on Dorian." He flushed a little and glanced away. "I was thinking Varric, because he would be popular with his books. Maybe Vivienne, but she might outmaneuver me and make herself Empress or something. Bull is too Qunari, Cole is too spirit, Sera would probably murder or prank every noble she sees, and Blackwall already told me that if I bring him we are no longer friends. Cassandra has potential, but would hate it. And I didn't think Solas would want to come, because… well, he would be assumed a servant."

He almost deflated after that long explanation.

"I might recommend Solas. He is better at politics and observation than you would think. But honestly any of them would do just fine and I don't think anyone would enjoy it. Except maybe Vivienne"

He watched me as I spoke, honestly considering what I said. I folded my hands and stared down at them. I could help.

Stupid, traitorous, guilt ridden emotions!

"Ugh." I buried my face in my hands. "I will only go on one condition."

I peeked through my fingers to see Sean perk up, looking surprised.

"Anything." He nodded, already agreeing, just to get me to go. I smirked and shook my head. Bad idea to agree before you know what you are getting into Sean.

"I will go on my terms only. I will dress how I want. I will not dance. I will not be given etiquette lessons, or other such nonsense. The Empress invited me. She will get me. I will not be an embarrassment to the Inquisition. But neither will I allow your advisors to try to train me how to act. I know enough about Orlais to be able to manage. And I will find a suitable outfit. But I will not," I pointed a finger in his face to emphasise my point, "let them try to turn me into an 'acceptable elf' for their party. Understood?"

Sean stared, then looked a little nervous.

"Ah… I don't know if Josephine or Leliana will approve of that. You see the Game is a matter of life…"

"I don't care, Sean. I am older than all of you put together. I will not be taught how to behave in court like some child. I have been in places you could never dream of." Technically true. "I will go on my terms, or you can have Josephine write a rejection letter to the Empress. I certainly won't write it. So I suppose it's up to you."

With that I stood up from the table and left the hall. Sean would let me know what they decided.

I wandered back to my room, changed back into my comfortable sleeping shirt, and collapsed in my bed, suddenly exhausted enough to fall right asleep.

Fire. Smoke. Blood on my hands. No! NO!

I jerked up in the bed, and my eyes darted around the dark room, looking for whatever threat my brain had perceived. When I saw none, I moaned and flopped back down on the bed willing my racing heart to slow. That nightmare just wouldn't leave me alone. At least this time there was no demon.

But the dream was different. This time I had watched the usual scene, the house burning before me, but then I had looked down and my hands were dripping with blood. It was running in rivulets down my arms. I was soaked. And in my hands were two black blades, the same blades I saw Lethanavir wield in the memory. I had felt an overwhelming sense of sorrow and rage at the sight of those blades. But I didn't know why.

I shuddered and rubbed my hands over my arms, trying to ease my sudden anxiety. I glanced at the window, noticing the early hour by the lack of light in the sky. I was wide awake though, I wouldn't be able to sleep after that.

I got up, and decided I would do some yoga in the open space on my floor. There wasn't much room, but I could make do. I spent about an hour going through the poses, working up from lighter stretches into more complex positions that made my muscles shake. Once there was a faint hint of light coming through my window, I stopped. I dressed quickly, and reached under my mattress to grab my journal. I would bring it with me. I had finished writing out every detail I could remember from the dream, except that I was watching from Lethanavir's eyes. That I would leave out, in case of others reading it.

I shoved the journal in my bag, and left the room. The chill still lingered outside, and the grass was frosted over beneath my bare feet. I stared down at them for a moment, wondering why that didn't bother me. I shrugged.

I walked over to the stables and saw the same very pale elf preparing Da'asha for travel. I smiled and walked over beside him.

"Good morning."

He jerked and whirled around, staring at me and turning bright red. I chuckled a little as Da'asha shoved past him to get to me, causing him to stumble as she snuffled at me, blowing air hotly in my face.

"Good morning to you too, Da'asha." I patted her neck.

The man continued to stare.

"I'm Shae."

He blinked and went even redder. I would have compared his color to a bright tomato. I was just about to speak again, maybe tell him it's ok or something, when he seemed to work through his daze.

"...I'm Telban."

His voice was quiet, and rough, like his throat was sore. I smiled at him.

"Pleased to meet you, Telban. Anyone who is a friend of Da'asha is a friend of mine."

He smiled shyly back at me and continued gathering tack and saddle, working around Da'asha's new position.

"What is it that you call her?"

"Hmmm? Da'asha? It means 'Little woman.'" I stroked down her nose and she lifted her head over my shoulder and rested there, like a hug. Telban smiled at that.

"I like that. We don't name 'em, usually. But it fits." He patted her flank, while he watched me.

"So, Telban. How long have you been with the Inquisition?"

"Ah, about a year. I joined when Master Dennett did."

"And where are you from?"

He looked a little wary at my questions, but shrugged and answered anyway.

"I'm originally from Kirkwall. Was there during the Qunari attack. I left when the stuff with the mages and templars was gettin' bad. I was lucky I got out early."

I nodded. So a city elf from Kirkwall. Interesting.

We were silent for a moment as he worked.

"Are you really from Arlathan?" He spoke rushed, as though afraid to ask. His accent made his pronunciation a little off. I gave him a small smile.

"Yes. I am." I looked back to Da'asha, if only to avoid his staring.

"Wow. You must be really old." He said, and then immediately a look of horror dawned on his face as he realized what he said. I laughed aloud and he fidgeted.

"Yes, Telban. I am old." I was still smiling, but I sighed.

"I'm sorry, serah. I didn't mean it like that."

"I know. Don't worry about it. It's the truth." I shook my head, chuckling. He bowed awkwardly and mumbled something about preparing other horses, and trotted off into the stables.

I tied my pack to the saddle and led her over to the gate. I leaned against her side as I watched the sun rise over the mountain. Da'asha seemed content to graze on the light dusting of grass where we stood.

It wasn't too long before others started to join us. Bull turned up first, yawning and talking to Krem about instructions for while he was away. Varric trailed over shortly after, stuffing a stack of papers in his bag, and grumbling about authors traveling. Harding and her scouts were grouped together over a map, talking quietly amongst themselves as they pointed out paths and discussed travel. Solas wandered in a little later, looking tired. They were all preparing their mounts when Sean came trotting down the stairs and right up to me.

"I'm glad I caught you. I managed to talk Leliana and Josephine into letting you do this your way. They weren't pleased about it at all. But they'll live." He dropped a heavy coin purse in my hand.

"What's this for?" I eyed it, and him speculatively.

"Well, if you are going to dress yourself, Leliana said we should at least give you the funds to properly do it. This will pay for pretty much any tailor you can find."

"So she doesn't want me to be embarrassingly underdressed?"

Sean nodded and sighed.

"Also… I get the feeling you aren't going to like this part…" He glanced over his shoulder and I noticed two figures walking down the steps behind him. It was Tammen and Alamen. They were outfitted for a journey.

I glared at Sean.

"I know, I know. I didn't want to push this on you. But they were getting pushy too. And Josephine is pushing for an alliance with them. Everyone's pushy! It's just the two of them. They are most useful, and seem to be some of the nicer ones. And the Dalish are the best scouts. This was a compromise since you are avoiding them."

I scowled, as I glanced back at them. They were watching all of us as we prepared. At least they are nicer than that last one I met. I sighed heavily.

"I make no promises to talk to them, Sean."

He nodded.

"Of course."

He put a hand on my shoulder and squeezed, smiling. And then he turned and walked over to talk to Harding and Solas together, since they were leading this expedition.

I grimaced and looked back to the twins. They had gone into the stable and led out two beautiful grey harts, and mounted them bareback.

Maybe it wouldn't be so bad. Those two are nice. Or Alamen was nice, and Tammen wasn't rude. I can make this work. Of course, Solas is along too. And he hates the Dalish.

I looked at Solas and saw him looking at the Dalish twins with narrowed eyes. I sighed. This was going to be a much longer trip than Crestwood was. That was one long day of travel there and back. But it would take us seven days to get to the Forbidden Oasis. Not that any one else was calling it that yet.

I didn't notice I was still watching Solas as my thoughts sorted themselves, until he turned and noticed me watching him. He smiled. It was soft, and tired. But it had warmth fluttering in my chest. I smiled back at him, and turned, mounting Da'asha.

This is going to be a long trip.