Most nights, Blaine didn't sleep. He tossed and turned, trying to keep his eyes closed just in case sleep would catch up with him, but it never did. Most nights, Blaine would just lie in bed, staring at the ceiling, trying to remember what his life was like before he decided that he was gay. Thinking about what it was like to live in a house where he felt loved. Thinking about how much different his life would be if he had just been born normal.

On the rare nights that he did manage to fall asleep, however, his subconscious haunted his with memories of his past, nightmares that he had barely survived living through the first time, let alone again and again as he slept.

A 13 year old Blaine stared up at his father with tears in his eyes. He didn't understand why he was looking down at him with so much hatred. Why was it such a bad thing to like boys? He had only told his parents because he felt that they would love him and accept him, no matter what. What he hadn't expected was for his father to backhand him, sending him sprawling onto the ground while his mother looked on in disgust.

"No son of mine is going to be a faggot. Do you hear that, boy? You're going to be normal, goddammit!"

(flash)

Blaine was crying in his bunk at the camp his parents had sent him to. In his attempt to be truthful with them, he had landed himself in his own personal hell. His parents called it a place where he would straighten up; he called it a reprogramming camp.

Along with four other boys around his age, he was forced to participate in activities rituals that were seen as masculine. He learned that he lacked the upper body strength to wield an axe the right way; he also learned what it felt like to get caned across both shoulders because he dropped said axe. He excelled at football, but it was written off as a fluke when he could so much as "walk like a man."

Blaine wanted so badly to be able to go home, to be able to tell his parents that he was fixed and that he liked girls and was going to get married and have babies and live happily ever after. He wanted so badly to be the perfect son that they wanted.

He cried because he knew he would never be good enough for them.

(flash)

Blaine was curled up in the middle of the hallway, using his arms to try to protect his head from the onslaught of feet coming his way.

"That'll teach you, you fag. Don't look at me like that again!" He heard someone spit and felt it land in his hair. As he tried to back himself up against a wall to get some leverage, but the kicking was coming from everywhere.

"What in god's name is going on here?" Blaine's heart instantly soared. A teacher, any teacher, anyone who could stop this.

"Oh, nothing. Just… Blaine just dropped something. We were trying to help him find it." Blaine moved his head from behind his arms and watched as the teacher appraised the situation. The elderly man looked him up and down, sneering as he met his eyes.

"Very well. Get to class, boys. I don't want you to get into any trouble.

(flash)

Blaine sat at home in his bedroom, his guitar lying broken on the ground in pieces. His father had just come in and smashed the guitar when he found out Blaine was talking to a "gay" guy. Blaine tried to keep it a secret but his family found out the camp didn't work. He was still gay. There was nothing they could do about it. The last thing Blaine's father said to him was, "I hope they beat the gay out of you. Then you can live as an actual human being." It was one of the worst things his dad had ever said. That phrase ran through Blaine's head every day.

Blaine woke up startled. He breathing was fast and a thin sheen of sweat covered his body. His father's words ran through his head again as he thought about his dreams that were more like nightmare flashbacks of his life. He wished he could just forget everything that happened.

Blaine glanced at the clock and groaned. Somehow, it was time for him to get up for school. He didn't want to have to face another day at school after having those dreams again. Sometimes, he felt the nights where he actually slept and had nightmares made him more tired than the ones where he didn't sleep at all. He got up, took a quick shower, and hurriedly got dressed, trying make his way downstairs before his parents woke. Heading into the kitchen, he hoped that he could grab some breakfast without them noticing. This morning, however, he wasn't that lucky. He found his father sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee. As soon as Blaine entered, his father looked up.

"You are up early," he addressed Blaine, looking at him questioningly.

"Uh, yeah. Have to meet up with someone before school," Blaine cringed. That was such a lame excuse.

"Is it that boy who dropped you off before?" Blaine's dad narrowed his eyes.

"Uh, no. Just Brittany, this girl in my class. She wants some help on a project," Blaine rushed out, thankful he came up with an excuse.

"Right, Blaine. Because you aren't going to hang out with "those sort" anymore, are you?" Mr. Anderson tested him.

"No, sir," Blaine falsely promised. He really didn't want to be having this conversation. He knew his dad tried to forget Blaine was gay for a while and those would be the best times, because he wouldn't be so aggressive and angry. It was when he focused in on it and tried to get rid of the gay, that Blaine was most afraid. "Uh, anyway, I have to go or I'll be late!" Blaine said. He grabbed his bag and ran out the door, hoping his dad wouldn't follow him. He knew Kurt said he would pick him up, but Blaine didn't think it would be the best idea. Blaine quickly texted Kurt telling him the change of plans and drove to school himself.

Blaine felt bad for cancelling on Kurt so abruptly because he seemed to be the kind of person who was always very organized, but he hoped he would forgive him. At least he could explain what happened because now Kurt knew what was going on, and while he didn't know what it was like for Blaine, at least he would understand.

He made it to McKinley without incident and got to his locker to find Kurt waiting there for him.

"I thought you might have been sick today," he accused as Blaine approached and started dialing his combination.

"Then how come you waited at my locker?" He replied lightly.

"I had to make sure, didn't I?" Blaine shrugged in response.

"So what's going on?" Kurt asked referring to his cancellation. Blaine sighed.

"Things are still kind of tense with my dad."

Kurt wished there was something he could do; he felt so helpless. He lifted his hand and held onto Blaine's forearm to give him any form of comfort. He smiled a little and shivered slightly at the goosebumps he got from the unfamiliar contact, but decided it was a good feeling. He continued collecting his books and almost said something in protest when Kurt let go, but thought against it because it would probably come off as creepy.

Kurt walked Blaine to his first period class and left with a sweet smile leaving Blaine with Kurt-filled thoughts for the whole class.

Kurt couldn't help but notice the whispers behind his back and the stares he got as he dropped Blaine off at his class and headed to his own. He just knew they were talking about him behind his back. He knew there was a rumor about him being gay after Santana spread the news, even if it wasn't just a rumor, he'd never actually confirmed it to the school. He figured they must have gotten blown out of proportion, but he didn't hear just how bad they had gotten out of hand until he walked into his class.

"So, Hummel? Was that your boyfriend? I've heard through the grape vine that you and the new kid have a secret love affair, he just came in and swooped you right off your feet and into his waiting arms." Kurt was caught off guard, he knew the gay rumors were going around, but this one was unexpected.

"I.. no.. what? Me and the new kid? Secret love affair? What are you talking about? I'm just trying to help him fit in at a new school. We're friends. That's it!"

The jock laughed, "Yeah, I bet you're trying to help him fit right into your—" Suddenly, their history teacher cut him off.

"David! One more word from you and you'll be sent to the principal's office, you hear me?"

So people thought that Blaine was his boyfriend? It wasn't like the thought hadn't crossed his mind. Blaine was quite good looking, and Kurt knew for a fact that he was also gay. Kurt spent the better part of the class thinking about what it would be like if he and Blaine were actually dating. Blaine could spend a night every few weekends at his house for the night, and Kurt would wake up and cook them pancakes and hash browns. They could hit a late night movie after a dinner date. It could be so good.

Kurt was snapped out of his little fantasy world, when a paper ball hit him in the head.

"Ha! Double points for nailing the fag right in the head!" one of the guys at the back of the class yelled. Kurt sighed. It could be so good, if only they weren't surrounded by these homophobes. Besides, what Blaine needed right now was a friend, not a boyfriend. He was dealing with enough stuff in his life right now; he surely didn't have time to juggle a relationship, too.

After first period, Kurt met up with Blaine again at his locker.

"Oooh! How cute!" one of the jocks yelled, about 3 octaves higher than his speaking voice, shoving Blaine on the shoulder, knocking him against a locker, "Your little boyfriend walking you to class, again? It's so cute, I think I'm going to puke!"

"He's not my boyfriend!" Blaine snapped, "He's just a civilized human being, which is more than I can say for you and your barbaric friends!"

"Boyfriend, fuck buddy, same difference!" the jock laughed as he walked away. Blaine chanced a glance at Kurt to get a feel for his reaction. He could see that Kurt's jaw was tensed and he looked like he wanted to punch something. He reached out and put his hand on his arm.

"You don't have to do this, you know. We're friends, we'll hang out and have lunch and whatever, but we don't have to walk to every class together. All of the teasing and bullying is only going to get worse for you." Kurt turned his head to meet Blaine's eyes and covered his hand with his own.

"If I let it show that they've gotten to me, they'll just keep doing it. If I at least act like I couldn't care less, it won't be as bad."

"Okay, well, just know that if it does get to be too much, I won't be offended. Just as long as you aren't being one of them, you're still cool in my book." They turned and walked side by side until they had to part ways for their classes.

"I'll see you at lunch?" Kurt's eyes lit up hopefully. Blaine nodded and ducked his head, trying to avoid making eye contact so as not to show Kurt his true emotions.

"Sure thing. I'm thinking we should go off campus today. You good for Jimmy John's?" Kurt nodded and a smile drifted his way as they separated.

All during Kurt's second period class, he couldn't keep his thoughts off of Blaine. He had spent so much time, so much energy, into helping this kid out, this kid he didn't even know. Sure, he had betrayed him once, but he had fixed it and they were friends. The biggest question that kept popping up in Kurt's mind, however, was why? Why did he even care? He had been able to hang out with Puck and Karofsky for the past year and a half without being bothered to try to stop them from throwing someone in a dumpster before. What made Blaine so special?

Kurt was glad Blaine had suggested Jimmy John's because usually the jocks stayed on campus for lunch and on the rare occasion they left, it was usually for fast food; they wouldn't bother getting sandwiches when a McDonald's was around the corner. The two boys sat facing each other, eating their sandwiches and making small talk. At least, it was small to begin with.

"I don't understand why everything has to be so hard," Kurt said out of the blue.

"What do you mean?" Blaine took a bite of his sandwich.

"Well, why can't people just accept others for who they are? Why does it matter so much? And why do we always have to put a label on everyone?" Kurt prattled off, angrily stabbing his straw into his drink.

"Cause life sucks," Blaine said absentmindedly, picking at his sandwich, his eyes drooping. Kurt sighed.

"I just don't understand why bullies have to go out of their way to make other people's lives a living hell." Blaine's eyes closed for a moment before he shook his head and jerked himself upright.

"Yeah, right."

"Blaine, are you okay?" Kurt asked, noticing something was off.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry 'bout me." Kurt nodded slightly, but still remained suspicious. They continued their conversation a little longer, but once they broke off, it only took Blaine about a minute before he looked about ready to slip into a full REM cycle.

"Blaine!" Kurt exclaimed, catching his attention. The curly haired boy jerked his head up, and Kurt noticed his eyes were slightly bloodshot. "Blaine, what's going on?" Kurt demanded.

"I'm just tired." Blaine shrugged, trying to avoid eye contact, but failing.

"Just tired? Just tired would be yawning occasionally, you look like you're about ready to drop dead." Blaine broke his eye contact with Kurt and looked down.

"I had some bad dreams and didn't sleep well."

"About what?" Kurt pressed.

"Stuff." Kurt rolled his eyes.

"Blaine you look terrible. Nobody loses this much sleep over some random dream." Kurt reached out and touched Blaine's hand trying to regain his full attention. Apparently it worked because his blue-green eyes were now mirrored in a pair of hazel ones.

"They weren't just dreams, they were memories… some of my worst, actually. Ones that I've pushed down and hoped would never resurface and they hadn't, for a while, until last night... I just relapsed. I guess."

"Do you want to talk about it?" Kurt decided it was best to ask now instead of demand the information like he was before. He had no idea what Blaine had been through.

Blaine let out a long sigh, "I've just been having flashbacks to some pretty dark times. Just things like my father trying to literally slap the gay out of me when I came out. I had the bruises for almost a week to remind me. You don't know how scary it is to have someone try to beat the gay out of you. My father's done it, kids at school did it, I even got sent to a camp where they tried to "straighten" me out. It's just… not a pleasant memory, Kurt. You don't understand how lucky you are just to have an accepting father." Blaine could feel his eyes start to well up with tears at the memory and Kurt could see that he was shaking. Kurt moved to the other side of the table to rest his hand against the shorter boy's back in an attempt to comfort him.

He wasn't quite sure what to do, but it killed him inside to see Blaine so shaken. "Shh. Blaine, try not to think about it, okay?"

"I... I try not to." Blaine sniffled, "But the memories just invade my dreams, I'm afraid to sleep, I'm afraid of the nightmares, I'm afraid of my father, and I'm afraid of what he's capable of, Kurt, I just can't take it anymore." Blaine had buried his face in his arms, sobbing against the table, Kurt was softly stroking his back, trying to get him to calm down.

"I know, I have some nature sound CDs in my car, maybe those will help you calm down, okay?" Blaine wiped the tears from his face and looked up at Kurt and nodded.

"Yeah. It couldn't hurt, right?" They packed up the rest of their lunch and spent the rest of the lunch period in Kurt's car, the sounds of crickets and waterfalls playing in the background as they finished their lunch.

Blaine wasn't sure what he did to deserve a friend like Kurt, but he was completely grateful for everything he'd done for him.

A/N: WE'RE BACKKKKKKKKKKKKK! Thank you guys so much for being so patient waiting for this chapter! We were going to try to write last night, but I (tazitz) had just gotten back from Chicago and I was unpacking and shit and everyone else was hyper and yeah, it just wouldn't have worked out.

Speaking of Chicago… IT WAS ! Seriously, Darren is the most amazing person to live, ever. Blair (blairoline) and I got to meet which was fantastic, so awesome! We also got to participate in a flash mob that was watched and filmed by Darren (Darren Criss has a video of us on his iPhone… Jealous?) and then we got to be in the VIP section of the parking lot because we paid $20 for the wristband and then… We. Got. Dumped. On. Legit, it was fucking HORRIBLE! We were just standing there, waiting for the show, and the rain just starts coming down in sheets. SHEETS! We get drenched. Then the clouds go away and the sun comes out, we do the mob, we get our places, and then 15 minutes before Darren… More. Fucking. Rain. Again, we got drenched. Oh god, I've never been that wet for that length of time before in my life (hahahahahahahaha), it was so bad. But then Darren came on and he was fantastic and adorable and so cute and just so… Darren. It was so worth it!

Anyway! Don't forget to track the caramelotti tag on tumblr and you should follow our individual blogs as well! I'll be posting my pictures from the concert, so that's a good reason why :p

Oh and Blair got to meet Darren. Forgot to add that. And she got a picture with him. Bitch.

Let us know what you think, thank you again for being so patient!