Searching for a Perfect Day

by harukaze

Due to unforeseen circumstances Elsa, after a five year absence, returns home to tie some loose ends. Modern Day AU. Eventual Elsanna. Femslash. Incest.

12. Chapter Twelve: Addressing Reality

Chapter 12: Addressing Reality

Light blue eyes crack to the sound of horns, late morning filters of light, an empty haphazard bed, and the promising smell of bacon in the air. She breathes in deeply, unused to smells emitting in her apartment as she's still in her bedroom and looks towards the digital clock that reads nearly ten. She can't remember the last time she had slept in so late…

Pushing the weightless white bed sheets off, she stares at her body in mild scrutiny for a moment and the relief that follows is so strange to her. She's never felt this form of content before—this freedom for who she is versus who she can be in the light of having…a partner. Because that's what Anna is at the end of the day, among a splay of other categorical things: a partner, a friend, a sister, a lover, her support, her confidant, her ward; it makes absolute sense that the redhead is the focal point of her life when she's so many things to the taller girl.

She's never woken up the next morning after having sex with anyone feeling thrilled. It could be said that she feels the exact opposite: dread. Dread at having to face a stranger in her home if they haven't gone away already and horror at an impending conversation that she doesn't want to have, but usually will be forced to.

Today and many mornings after, her mind gleefully reminds, is the first of many. An inadvertent smile lands on now woken features, the need to see Anna first and foremost. She grabs a random camisole littering the floor, opens her drawer for a fresh pair of panties, and dons them. It's not as if she has to be modest in her own home, although the thought of walking into her kitchen naked as the day she was born crosses her mind, but more importantly her sister's reaction to her boldness.

She wonders briefly if the other girl wants to stay indoors all day…possibly "grace" every part of her condo before her inevitable flight back home. The thought makes her outwardly smirk as she crosses the threshold of her bedroom to the hallway.

There's a small wonder to watching someone do a domesticated task, especially when they're not aware of your presence. Case and point, the present. Anna, her copper strands in a haphazard ponytail, is wearing nothing but a camisole and panties (Elsa's not sure how they both manage to wear the same thing sans color), her light voice singing away to Drive By (funny enough), hips shaking to the beat of the music streaming through her ears, while the sounds of frying bacon fill the air, destroying silence and all its perceived golden glory.

The blonde remains in her spot at the end of the hallway for a long moment, light blue eyes grazing at everything, filing it away to reach in later when she needs a light inside a dark tunnel. How is it possible for someone—anyone—to be this beautiful and be so natural at it? There's no deliberately wanton movement, even though with personal experience Elsa's seen this gloriousness from her sister. There's just blinding unadulterated light: warm, streaming, full of unharnessed energy. The colorful apron hides nothing of a curvaceous backside, the thought of kissing every expanse of light skin (again) flitting through her mind.

Before she's fully aware of it, Elsa's feet are taking deliberate wide steps towards the unassuming redhead, the need to hold the smaller girl seizing the blonde's consciousness in a tight grip. It's a small wonder that she didn't think her condo was this spacious before, or maybe the desire to run through the seemingly large space between the hallway and kitchen wasn't very important in the past. Regardless, today it feels like a too long distance, her fingers itching at encompassing a smooth waist.

An adorable "eep" sounds from the recess of the back of the smaller girl's throat, releasing a husky chuckle from the blonde. Green-blue eyes widen at first from surprise and then brightens in elation, Elsa's chest feeling light from the adoration and pure love she sees from those orbs glistening back to her. There's no question or hesitance—not that she's expecting it after last night (although, deep inside, she has to admit there's always going to be a part of her questioning all of this), just happiness from seeing her…just that.

Her finger pulls on the right ear bud housed inside a reddened ear, the music streaming from it momentarily between them as she nips on a cool lobe, rolling the flesh with her lips and tasting the tip of it with her tongue. A delicious moan sounds out from the smaller girl before a freckled arm slaps her side eliciting another husky chuckle from her.

"Good morning," she greets, overcome with joy and holding the redhead tighter into her, a warm back melding with her front.

A soft kiss is placed on her cheekbone before Anna goes back to her task. "Morning sleepyhead," she greets as well, using the tongs to turn the bacon over. "You don't usually sleep past eight…if my memory serves me right."

"I don't usually get a morning wake up call that pushes my sleep schedule to ten…if my memory serves me right," is her easy quip, earning a rather proud laugh from the girl in her arms.

"I hope you'll forgive the indiscretion this time around."

Her lips find a freckly shoulder and indulge in kissing every spot, small tremors erupting from the smaller girl as she does so. "Something tells me anything you'll do is forgiven indefinitely."

Anna's hand raises up to her face first, skimming her cheeks before fingers card through her messy fringe. "I better take advantage of it before the pardoning affection dies."

"It'll never die."

She doesn't mean to say it so seriously, but that's how it comes out, sending the smaller girl's back to straighten against hers. In record time the tongs are clattering noisily in the counter and Elsa has half the mind to turn the burner off and shove the hot pan away before Anna turns towards her, arms enveloping her neck and pulling her into a rough kiss. She gladly receives the warm, willing mouth, tongue darting, tasting her lips before pushing its way in.

The familiar throb in her stomach flares, excitement bursting in her chest as she pulls the redhead into her closer, eyes shutting close and honing in on the feeling of soft, fleshy lips melding and dancing with her own.

There's something sensual about hearing the sounds produced from this one action. There are the sweltering moans that linger in the space around them, the short breaths fanning, finding purchase in thinning air, the enthusiastic smacks of pliant lips, the slithering of meeting tongues…all of it with a seeming inadvertent purpose of heightening that throb in the pit of her stomach to renewed senses and brimming the weightlessness in her chest until she finds herself so breathless she has to pull away.

Damn you air and your continued importance at staying alive…

Glazed turquoises eye her, sees only her, and that look of devotion in addition to sharp gasps exhaling from scarlet, wet lips…

Elsa shakes her head outwardly, shutting her eyes close in an attempt to pull herself together. When she looks back at her sister, she notes the upward turn of those lips and wants to kiss her again just to get rid of that smug look there.

"You almost burned breakfast." It doesn't sound much like a spurn when her voice is croaky and still so utterly breathless.

Anna's addictive, carefree laughter bounces in her ears, eyes twinkling in mirth. "You started it."

"Shall I end it then?"

"Nooooo…"

"But what about breakfast?"

"There's a way we can both eat without cooking anything."

Laughter breaks from her chest, the lewdness of the smaller girl with the added unapologetic grin adding to it.

This. This is what she was missing with her past relationships.

She hates comparing the two, because really, there's no comparison at all. Where there was strangeness, discomfort, and the powerful need to sever all ties as soon as the deed was done before, now there's endless warmth—an all encompassing desire to keep this girl around her at all times; to listen to her, speak with her, just to be with her. Elsa's never felt that around any human being barring her family. It's hard enough for a stranger, classmate, or peer to even make her smile…Free laughter? Out of the question.

"You're impossible," she berates just as the mirth dies down, drawing a chuckle from the redhead as well. "Although something tells me we'll need actual food for the activity that you're implying and in the end, regardless of an all you can eat buffet, neither of us will actually be full."

"We won't know until we try."

The blonde pinches adorable cheeks, plants a small kiss on suddenly pouty lips before reaching around the smaller girl, reignites the gas stovetop and pulls the still hot pan atop the flames.

"Sorry for being a clear distraction," she says softly, picking up the tongs and placing it into a waiting hand. "We do need to eat a tangible breakfast, so if you'd please continue and act like I'm not in the room."

"Pfft, impossible," Anna replies, grins wider, and continues her task. "I bought some oranges at the supermarket. You have a juicer?"

"Did dad stay the night on some of his visits and consequently spent the morning after and had breakfast before he left?"

"That would be a sarcastic yes…Which gets me asking…what do you think that was about? His obsession with fresh orange juice?"

"Something inherently dad that we'll never know, but will always remember."

Elsa smiles softly as she pulls the juicer from her appliance cupboard, remembering the first morning her father had spent the night at her condo and the sudden appearance of the small gadget.

"It's great, isn't it?" She looks over at her sister's warm countenance. "That there are just…things we can remember, just like that? Dad and his juicer."

"Mom and her facial creams."

"Dad and his aftershave."

"Mom and trying random noodle houses…regardless of the weather."

Elsa laughs, reminiscing many meals of this same instance. "Dad and his newspapers."

"Did you know mom bought him an iPad for his birthday a couple years back and he never used it?"

The whine of the juicer joins the noisy combination of the blower, the stovetop, and easy conversation.

"Did you know that dad bought mom some expensive French ablution cream thing that he thought was for humans but was actually a part of a pet grooming collection kit?"

Anna's infectious laughter joins the activity, Elsa's trailing soon after.

They exchange verbal knowledge of each of their parents, each one topping the next, as they set what will be breakfast ready. As the redhead begins frying a couple of eggs for the two of them, the taller girl puts in a few sweet rolls in the toaster, and not long after, they're enjoying the fruits of their labor on a messy dining table, Elsa's group project strewn on one end and the two of them sharing a rare clean corner, chairs impossibly close that they're legs and arms are touching—inseparable—one of the upsides, the blonde finds, to being a lefty to Anna's righty.

"What do you think they'd say if…"

Their conversation has turned to its impending goal, Elsa eyeing the orange juice to her left as the redhead's trailed question stays in the air between them. She pushes a bacon bit around in her plate for a while, eyebrows stitching in thought and concentration at procurement for an honest answer.

"What surprised me the most about either of them," she starts, "is when the shock settled—when they were able to bend their mind into the situation, there was no…disgust. As if…as if when presented with the problem, that's all that they had in mind. There was no ethical dilemma, no berates for my feelings, and certainly no guilt trips. They made it so easy to stay here all the while urging me to go back.

"I was afraid of my first talk with the two of them. Dad…surpassed all expectations. I…I was ready for him to kick me out of the house that night…" Elsa smiles sadly as she looks down at her half eaten plate, feeling Anna's hand rubbing the length of her leg in silent consolation while her mind conjures the picture of Alexander, hair in disarray as he pushes his fingers roughly through it and eyes in perpetual muted horror. "He said something that'll stay with me forever. I stayed up that night literally thinking nothing but those words—dissect them, analyze them…as I do about every little thing…" The redhead chuckles softly, her head leaning on the taller girl's arm and kissing her bicep thoughtlessly. "'I don't believe in a world where love, in its most basic and pure form, should be something to apologize about.'"

She can feel her sister's back straighten at those words, green-blue eyes widened at her in shock and wonder. The blonde smiles at her, automatically combing some errant burnish strands behind a wonderfully soft ear. "Mom was the same," she continues, gathering the other girl's hands in hers and kissing her knuckles before placing them in the warm space between them. "The first time she visited, she berated me for not telling her and relegating dad to telling the news, but other than that, she only listened. Nodded at the right times, spoke when the silence was too suffocating and the guilt and self-loathing was obvious…probably from my body language.

"They always plead me to come back home and face it. Year after year. They could've guilted me into coming back by telling me about your circumstances and…I would've. The first instance I'd have heard of your falling out or problems or general…depression…I would've booked the first flight available to see you. But they didn't. They wanted me to come back on my own terms—when I was ready. And you suffered for it."

A discontent growl erupts at the back of Anna's throat, her face falling into open chastise at what Elsa assumes to be her guilt face showing. She merely gives a helpless smile, receiving a firm, small kiss in the process. She nuzzles the warm face with her own, showering little kisses on smattered freckles on one cheek until it elicits a smile from the younger girl.

"Mom and dad would want us to be happy," she says resolutely, receiving an ardent nod from her sister. "Maybe they'd ask us to keep it as discreet as possible…and to probably be more sisters than lovers when in their presence…but from what I know of them and what they've openly showed me…they'd be understanding. They'd see that we're happy and to them…that's all that's ever mattered…so they won't take that away us."

The twinkle in eyes she's come to adore brightens, the smaller girl's hand breaking away from her grasp and encompassing her waist into a side hug that she returns wholeheartedly. They resume breakfast this way, thoughts of their parents and each other in the forefront of their minds while easy conversation passes in between.

O—O

"My flight is at two…and I want to do something for you before I leave."

Elsa's always loved the utter straightforwardness of her sister; there's no way anything can be misconstrued with a voice bearing so much clarity and assurance. Passing her a plate full of dish soap suds, the blonde can only look at her in question as she takes the proffered plate and rinse it off before putting it in a rack to air dry.

"And what is that?" she asks, playing along.

"There was an arts and crafts store next to the Sav-On."

"Mhmm, Hobby Lobby?"

"I already bought all the stuff you'd possibly need. I just need the brains behind the operation directing me."

The cryptic conversation has the blonde confusedly looking at her sister who merely grins her way easily.

"Elaborate?"

"Let's finish this and I'll show you instead."

"Showing versus telling's always nice."

"In more ways than one?"

"In more ways than one."

Anna chuckles, cupping some soap suds into a wet palm and wiping it against the blonde's cheek. Of course this incites a small water war, but after fifteen minutes Elsa gets an idea of what her sister's talking about.

"I'm finding more and more that we seem to be doing a lot of artsy stuff together," the blonde says as she looks into a couple plastic bags littering the foot of the model.

"Regardless of the fact that being artsy isn't your forte?"

"Indeed…but are you sure this is what you want to do?"

"As opposed to something funner?"

"Mmm…who knows when we'll see each other next?"

"Next week?"

Elsa sighs, her brows stitching as she gives her sister a knowing look. "We can't do this every week Anna…regardless of how nice it sounds."

The redhead follows her sigh, taking the bags from her and putting it atop the model before dumping the contents everywhere.

"Please say that you understand why," Elsa continues, giving her a pointed look.

"I understand it," the smaller girl says, her tone somewhat petulant. "Doesn't mean I agree with it."

"I know the distance is bad—

"It's gonna be even worse now—

"But we still have our outside lives to lead. Which brings me to our next issue—

"Something tells me I'm not going to like it…"

"Anna…"

Green-blue eyes look up at her, stoicism played to a tee that it almost hides the wonderful and open girl that she knows is beyond the nonchalant exterior.

"I think we need to…sit down and talk about…this."

"Talk about what, specifically?"

"All of it."

"I'm going to miss my flight and you'll still have a model with no environmental factors. Sounds like time not well spent."

The blonde gathers the smaller girl by the waist, drags her in for a tight hug and notes minimally how she doesn't get a hug back.

She fights a groan clawing its way out of her chest and asks instead, "Why are you being difficult about this?"

"I'm not…" Anna grunts, sighing outwardly before landing a forehead on her shoulder. "It's hard not wanting to speak about all the impending problems when all we have is three hours…and all that's waiting for me in New York is distance, papers, homework, friends that are trying to hook me up with other girls, and worst of all…there's no you.

"I don't want to talk about it…I understand. No PDA's—I messed up yesterday with your classmates here, but that was just…me seeing red—not thinking or…thinking but with the wrong body part. I get that we have to conceal all of this…indefinitely. I won't ever meet your classmates again so…yesterday…it won't be a big deal. They just saw you in a different light…as far as they know I'm just a random girl you're shacking with."

Before Elsa's quite aware of it her teeth are grinding against one another, jaw clamping in tandem and her hands gathering a warm face so she can stare at a hurt face unabashedly.

"While you and I both know that's far from the truth," she starts, voice impossibly low, "What I want, in clear understanding between the two of us, is that this is not a normal relationship in any standards. Yes, we understand it…but do we truly understand it? This…you're right…there's absolutely no PDAs. Maybe handholding or brief hugs, but that's as far as we're able to go especially when we're around people that know us. We always, always have to be sisters, first and foremost. Behind closed doors, we can be whomever we want to be, but outside of it, we have to live by their rules. If I have to protect you by going as far as—god forbid—going out with another girl to hide this relationship—Anna!"

The smaller girl recoils away from her, head shaking in obvious disagreement.

"It was an example!"

"It's the worst example you could've come up with!"

"You really believe that I would want anyone else, but you after all this time? Now that I have you, I'd just relegate you as a side relationship just to fool the outside world?"

"Would you?"

"Clearly you don't know me enough."

"Yeah, being gone for five years will do that!"

Everything stops, and Elsa steps back as if physically slapped. She sees the horrified look on Anna's face as she gulps uneven breaths inward, her body taking her further, back into the kitchen and her arms coming up just under her stomach, fingers curling against each other. She notes minimally of the inadvertent defense mechanism she thinks she's gotten rid of, but here it is, alive and well. Her sister is at her side in record time, arms enveloping her waist as Anna stands in front of her, alike a roadblock, and keeping a firm grip on her body.

"You know I didn't mean that," the redhead says breathlessly, her tone helpless, apologetic, and, above all, scared.

The blonde draws in a steady breath to help calm her lancing heart. "It comes from somewhere," she replies with only half a mind available.

"Yes, the same place that vomited 'going out with other girls to fool the world'. Seriously Elsa…what the hell?"

"I meant it for you and not for me…"

"Which means…" Anna trails off before completely understanding the words, her face showing horrified realization.

The taller girl sighs, carding copper strands back with her fingers as she gives a defeated look to the now displeased girl. "If…if you get out of this…relatively unscathed, that's all that matters to me. If that means that some random girl can be your…public lover—

"Hell no." Turquoise eyes look back at her resolutely, lips pressing in a firm, straight line. "I swear, did you…did I get you that tired last night that you didn't hear me while I was spilling my heart out?"

Elsa chuckles deprecatingly. "No…I…I heard and loved every word you said."

"You're totally not acting like it. I love you. We're in this together. We are not…I repeat…we are not going to have another couple of random girls in this relationship. I refuse to share you and I don't want anyone else but you. I get the rules Elsa. I get it…okay? No PDAs and we're sisters to anyone else other than ourselves. I'll get my priorities straight. I'll go back to New York and I'll stay there like a good little girl. Can we please not fight? Not about this…I mean, it'll only get harder from here on out right? We're on each others' sides…why are we fighting about this?" And as an afterthought to the sudden rambling, "I only have three hours left! Two hours and…forty-eight minutes!"

The taller girl nods, holding Anna's face again and stepping closer to her. "Okay…yes. You're absolutely right."

"Not words I hear everyday…"

Elsa smiles helplessly, thumbs grazing over proud cheekbones. "No other girls…just you and me."

"I don't even get why that was an option to begin with…"

"A loophole…backdoor…just in case—

"How many times do I have to kiss you and drag you into your bedroom and have my way with you for that blonde mop of yours to understand that I'm yours?"

She seals anymore impending words with a rough kiss, Anna responding in sheer frustration, strong hands grasping the roots of her hair and pulling. She doesn't mind the pain—actually invites it.

The knowledge that Anna's right, that this is fleeting enters her mind again and pushes anymore of the unnecessary specifics out…for now. They'll get through it…They have to. As Anna proclaimed they have to be able to protect each other…and even though a part of her is unwilling to let the smaller girl take that much responsibility (because it's the blonde's, always and forever), the two of them have to be equally strong in order to weather any kind of storm that may come to pass. A rare optimistic thought flits through her mind that they might not have to come to that, but it doesn't hurt to be prepared, right?

She draws the lingering kiss to a close, a small nip placed on a lower lip before she opens her eyes to glimmering green-blues. The hardness is gone amidst the expressive orbs and this small fact gives her a bit of relief. She's unused to seeing anything but a carefree look upon her sister's countenance…any other extreme emotion seems wrong somehow.

The smaller girl grabs her arm and drags her back to the model, inciting work to start now or never. Elsa obliges, because that's what she does. She has a feeling she'll indulge Anna's every whim 'til the day she dies and overall that seems like a perfectly fruitful life.

They look at the physical and topographical maps that she had made the night before, overseeing the model board and directing the redhead as to what every portion would look like, Anna nodding at the right moments as her eyes searches through every corner.

After much deliberation, they begin with painting the entire surface an ocean blue color, the smaller girl setting to work thereafter by cutting styrofoam and foam boards to create the rough outline of the land and gluing molded foil into them to show the nuances and different levels of packed earth, terraces, and bluffs.

Elsa's not quite sure where she got the confidence a day before to tell her teammates she could do this…Maybe she wasn't thinking about how hard it actually is…but now that she's in the position and seeing just how hard her sister's working to make sure all her directions are followed, the ridiculousness of her wants and needs are showing in crystal clear clarity.

"If you tell me I don't have to do this one more time—

"You actually won't do it?" the blonde prods with a smile, brushing a combination of styrofoam boards and foil together with forest green paint. They've been at it for more than an hour and it finally feels as if her vision is coming into a reality.

She looks up just in time to see the smaller girl roll her eyes, loving the view of the redhead's body splayed carefully over the model as she paints the bluffs into the side near the castle's projected perimeter an artistic combination of white, brown, and green.

"You're sure you'll be able to keep the buildings in spot even though I make this into rocky terrain?" her sister asks instead, ignoring the jibe.

Elsa merely shrugs. "As I said, we're architects. We should be building into the land, not over it. Life isn't so convenient in the 1840's."

"You and your little details."

"It's a love-hate relationship…although now that I think about it, this is taking much longer than I want."

"Why? You had plans?"

"Yes, but they're all still in the relative confines of my house…"

Anna looks up to her, mischievous eyes twinkling and lips in a devilishly upturned smile. "Too bad this is gonna take the rest of my time here…but if I were to visit next week…"

"Anna…"

The redhead simply laughs. "Don't worry Elsa…I get it! You don't want me here."

"Oh, really?"

"So you can bring other girls in this relationship without me knowing…like that Hayley chick."

"Your imagination ran away with you on that one…Please don't blame me for your quickly drawn assumptions."

Green-blue eyes roll brattishly. "There was a girl half naked walking around in your apartment…You mean to tell me that if you saw a girl half naked at our house you wouldn't go ballistic?"

"Which brings me to my next point…I spoke with Marie yesterday. I wanted to talk to you but you weren't answering your phone so speaking with Kai was going to be the next best thing. Imagine my surprise when she tells me that you had a guest over and that she was a relatively nice girl."

A mortified blush rides up her sister's countenance, from her neck to the edge of her forehead, eyes refusing to look at the blonde's direction. Elsa chuckles at seeing such an innocent response.

"Which of your friends was trying to set you up?" she asks, setting her attention back onto painting the styrofoam while keeping her peripherals trained on the smaller girl.

"Jenna…" is the small answer.

The blonde's smile widens. "Was she a relatively nice girl?"

Anna eyes narrow at her, causing a chuckle to erupt from her chest. "If you should know…she met the rare five out of five criteria."

The taller girl whistles into the air. "Five out of five? Wow…and her name?"

"…Terra."

"And was she actively trying to pursue you?"

"…yeah."

"You don't have to sound so hesitant in answering my questions, you know."

"My girlfriend is asking about a girl pursuing me when she was four thousand miles away…"

The label really does take her aback and she doesn't have to feign a surprised, "Is that what I am?"

Anna rolls her eyes again. "Apart from being my sister and a total jerk, yes."

The taller girl's face splits into a grin before the laughter commences, the redhead sighing loudly amidst the sound bouncing across the room. Elsa gets up from her spot on the floor and makes her way to the huffing girl, grabbing her by the waist and hugging her from behind.

"You're adorable."

"You didn't think that yesterday…If I wasn't so tunnel visioned at catching some girl in your apartment, I would've frozen over from your voicemail message."

The blonde searches her brain for what it could be, but it seems her sister isn't done.

"'Anna, call me when you get this'…click. Like…no 'Hello, I'm worried you haven't called, please call me back asap. Just… 'Call me or else'."

She smacks a rounded butt cheek causing an outward harassed yelp from the smaller girl. "The next time you decide to visit, you will tell me ahead of time," Elsa growls into a hot ear, tightening her hold on Anna's waist and pushing their bodies inexplicably closer. "And not because of the ridiculous notion that I'm housing some other girl in here. Why on Earth would I need another girl when you and I have been pretty much an item since I left?!"

"People get sexually frustrated!" the redhead exclaims hotly, giving her a pout after. "My thought was we weren't…there wasn't anything yet. We were, but we weren't. We haven't spoke about it or anything. We were waiting 'til you got back to really talk about it."

"And since we haven't spoken about it everything else was still fair play?"

"No…"

"Exactly. Because Anna…if…I swear to god, if I found out that you brought a girl home—regardless or maybe because of her being a five out of five criteria and…did some things together…that would not fly. It's not to say I would've said anything…I'd probably let it fester and rot in my brain for an indefinite period until it blows up into epic proportions that neither of us could withstand, but we…ever since you kissed me, that sealed it. Just so you know. It sealed it for me. If…if you wanted to act as if it was a trial period—if it was just to test the waters based on how you felt, fine! But you kissing me made that decision on my end. How you got into the conclusion that I would be sexually frustrated wanting you and bedding another girl because of it is utter…lunacy."

"'You're not tied to me'. You're exact words! How—

"YOU! You! You're not tied to me. You can…you can romp all the five out of fives in New York and because we haven't formally decided anything, it would've been forgivable."

"Whereas if you were the one to do it, it'd be unforgivable?"

"Yes…based on how you came stomping into my apartment yesterday with this 'Mine' attitude on full display…it would be completely unforgivable if I were the one to…cheat…"

The taller girl can see that it takes a moment for Anna to reel this in, but when she does, she's rubbing a heavy hand over her eyes, shaking her head at herself for this blatant wrongdoing. Elsa smiles warmly at the show of self-exasperation, kissing an open cheek just as her sister groans out loud.

"Why am I such a walking contradiction?" she bemoans loudly, causing the blonde to laugh and nuzzle a warm cheek some more.

"It was a simple misunderstanding that went completely out of hand," she says softly, hugging the other girl closer to her and loving how the smaller body caves in willingly. "Next time, let's talk about it before making hasty decisions. Do we have an agreement to that?"

Anna nods, sending a soft, apologetic smile that sends her heart fluttering. She looks at the clock hanging from a wall in the dining area and counts the minutes, then surveys the work they had accomplished within the allotted time frame. When she looks back at her sister, she can see they've both come to an agreed conclusion.

"You'll be able to finish the rest by yourself?" the redhead asks with a wide grin, body turning and arms coming around her neck to draw her closer.

"Yes," is the small, confident answer before the smaller girl pulls her in for a kiss.

Twenty-three minutes. That's enough time…right?

Elsa stops thinking—just focuses on the smaller body fit so snuggly against her own and at pliant, smooth lips she won't be able to feel or taste for another month. This distance thing is going to be even harder than before. She didn't think that was possible considering the hellish two weeks they've both just endured, but she knows…that was a cakewalk in comparison. She just hopes the two of them will last the month without breaking apart from the wide separation. It's easy to picture though…going back on her own words—be a hypocrite, booking a flight back to New York for the weekend to spend it with Anna regardless of how much of a bad idea it is in between homework, a finals group project, and other pending class assignments. It would be so sinfully easy…and she wouldn't care whatsoever if it damages her grades or her classmates'…

This girl rules her life. She finds she doesn't mind that at all.

O—O

"You think this part ever gets any easier?"

Elsa swallows the rough patch coating her throat before leaning her head into her sister's, swallowing her deeper in an already initiated side-hug.

"No," the blonde says softly, her head shaking infinitesimally. "But I hope it'll be the last time we have to do it."

Green-blue eyes look up at her, and regardless of the place they're in (inside her car in one of the many parking lots outside of LAX), she closes the small distance between the two of them and meets the smaller girl's lips with her own, branding this feeling and taste in her mind. She can feel Anna's grip on her waist tighten, the kiss growing with fervor and helplessness, and truly, does it ever get easier? Saying goodbye? Being so far away from someone you love?

She already knows the answer, but for the sake of the optimism that her sister brings out in her, she attempts to squelch the thought into a positive one.

This will be the last time. Neither she nor Anna can take any more of these goodbyes without damaging something.

They weather on through, as they're both used to, and within a couple more minutes, they separate, albeit slowly, hesitantly. Anna nuzzles into her neck a final time before breaking the half-hug and leaving the car from her respective side, the blonde following shortly after. It's silent between them barring the clicking of their footsteps in an otherwise empty parking garage, Elsa instinctively grabbing her sister's hand as they make their way across the skybridge into the second floor of the main portion of LAX.

The way she had left a couple of weeks prior bares a glaring resemblance to how they are today: tightly grasping hands, dragging silences, and the thought of the next four weeks in the forefront of each of their minds. But she can also feel the palpable difference between then and now. There seems to be a flittering hope today whereas despair and anguish loitered amongst them two weeks ago; a lightness in her chest versus the empty cavity ringing out the hollowness in resounding thuds in her ears.

They stand in front of a computer terminal and Anna grips her hand tighter as the smaller girl keys in her confirmation number in the touchpad screen before them—again so alike from when they were last in an airport only a complete role reversal. Elsa wonders briefly if it's possible to steal a kiss from the smaller girl this time around and finds she and hypocrisy may be too close friends at this point and time.

They're at the gate heading to customs in what seems like record time and the blonde hears and sees the sigh expelling from her sister as the redhead turns to her, gripping on the knapsack on her shoulders a bit too harshly. All around them are hurrying people, walking around them like a biblical sea parting. The irony isn't lost to the taller girl.

"I get home at around ten," Anna says softly in the small space between them, earning an understanding nod at her end. "I…I'll be busy during the week catching up on my finals so I'm heading to Kristoff's for my weekly session right when I land. I'll probably Skype you around eleven, at the earliest."

Elsa smiles openly, hoping it's enough to drown the helplessness she feels prickling in the corners of her eyes. "I'll be waiting."

It looks like Anna means to nod in reply, but instead her green-blue eyes dart just then and narrow at the random spot over the taller girl's right shoulder, and when she turns, she finds a couple sharing a long lip lock, causing an exasperated chuckle at her end. The unfairness of the situation is amusing to see from an outsider's perspective, but all she really wants is to erase the pout beginning to grace her sister's countenance.

"Come here."

She doesn't need to say anymore. She rarely has to when it comes to the redhead. She finds that they're so attuned to one another that silences come as easily as open conversations.

Her arms find themselves wrapped around hunched, caved-in shoulders, the smaller girl's hands enveloped tightly at the base of her back. The copper locks beckon to her so she answers the call with a strong swipe of her fingers, inhaling heavily as Anna's scent floats and lingers around them.

"Love you Elsa," the small voice proclaims softly over the general din of their surroundings, causing her to automatically push her sister's bangs away from her forehead and place a punctuated kiss on the wrinkled, but otherwise smooth skin. She looks down into saddened eyes, knows somehow that she's mirroring that expression to a tee.

"Love you too," she responds shortly, hands combing back an unruly mop of red hair. She should've braided them after…is an afterthought that just passes by. "Have a good flight. Try to get some rest during it. I'll talk to you tonight. Text me when you land just so I know you're safe." She says it like the list that it's become in her head.

She already misses the arms retracting away, but steadies her features, her fingers the only part rebellious enough to reach out habitually to touch a fleeting hand. Anna looks up at her, tragically beautiful with a too strong smile amidst deep frown lines, and Elsa has to use every ounce of effort tot keep her feet cemented to the ground while the smaller girl walks further and further away, still facing her, but carefully inspecting her surroundings so she doesn't bump into anyone.

The redhead puts up four fingers in front of her, saying loudly for everyone within the vicinity to hear including (and especially) her, "Four weeks!"

The taller girl makes a controlled effort to not laugh, but it comes out regardless in tandem to expressive, understanding nods. "Four weeks," she mouths softly into the air and she knows Anna's too far now to hear, but the smaller girl grins a thousand watt smile in her direction nonetheless.

"Love you Elsa!"

She can hear the snickers from surrounding passerby but maintain a cool facade even when her sister blows her one last exaggerated kiss with an open mouthed, unrepentant grin as she turns around and cuts through a corner, finally going completely out of sight.

The grin that she mirrors from the smaller girl falls away slowly, her feet perpetually glued to the ground as people weave and make their way around her. She's sure that she's looking completely ahead of her, but she can't put any shape or action in place…as if the world has lost all color and there's absolutely nothing she can do but stand there and be an unwilling participant.

The event of two weeks ago enters her mind again…at how difficult it was to be the one to walk away. Now that she's experiencing the opposite end of the spectrum she finds that being the one left behind feels so much worse. There's this feeling of utter helplessness dashed with a spoonful of insecurity.

The world goes on unhindered and she's just here…stuck…as if left behind.

The heaviness in her lungs makes every breath feel pronounced, but it's what tethers her back into reality and out of her suddenly brimming mind. She blinks once, twice, draws in a shaky, but heavy breath, and turns, lead heavy legs taking her out of the suffocating confines of the airport and further and further away from what (who) she feels gives her entire life meaning.

A childish part of her demands that they not do this. Who cares if she doesn't finish her degree in the most prestigious architecture school in the world? It's not like she needs it. Does she even want it? Not the same way she wants Anna. And definitely not the same way she needs Anna…

It's almost laughable that they have to be this far away from one another. Even more hilarious is the fact that this same time last month, this would be a non-issue.

But things change. And they have…for the better.

She needs to find the same girl that was telling her sister weeks ago that they have to do this…do the adult thing and get back to their lives because that would be the responsible thing. But that girl and the girl she is now is definitely not the same person. That girl had known longing and heartache, but not reciprocation.

Back to square one.

The drive home is empty and automatic. She's sure she got honked a lot for driving way below the speed limit, but finds she just doesn't care about anything else, but the cavity in her chest…as if a vital part of her has been stripped and there's nothing she can do to get it back.

It's strange how the world can lose its glimmer and wonder in the face of reality. A strong part of her wants to go home so she can relive every moment of the past twenty-four hours—imagining Anna in her kitchen, in her bed, in her shower. A just as strong part wants to postpone her inevitable return because the part that made her home the actual home it's always meant to be is gone, so now it's just an empty space.

Four walls and a roof.

The architect in her is laughing a maniacal laughter that echoes in the recesses of her brain.

She completely shuts it off: thinking. She's so good at diving into her mind it's a small wonder that she's ever able to take herself out of it.

Getting home in relative safety is a wonder in and of itself, and Elsa makes it a point to get to her condo as quickly as possible so she can immerse herself back into her work. The next eight or so hours while waiting for her sister's call or text is going to be long and winding and a distraction is what she needs the most at the present moment. She can only hope her brain doesn't multitask its way around to thinking of Anna all the way through it.

She sighs loudly as she steps out of the elevator, her hands unconsciously digging through her pockets for her keys and her body taking her to her destination robotically. Only when she hears her name being called does she look up, her face schooling itself into nonchalance and pushing the surprise out of the way.

"Kareem?" She means for it as a greet, but her tongue hasn't caught up to the rest of her yet, apparently.

He gives her brief nod and moves out of the doorway as she stands beside him, watching her insert the key and twist it before opening it wide enough for the two of them to enter.

"I texted you," he finally explains, causing her to reach into her other pocket for her phone and sees that, indeed, he did text her, asking if it was okay to work on their project today or if she was still…busy. "Couldn't get an answer so I thought coming over would be the next best thing. Wasn't here for very long…else I would've just left anyway…Wouldn't have wanted to intrude…" he trails off.

She nods understandingly and motions him inside, putting her keys in a bowl close to the door before going further in the cool abode. "I'm still not used to using my phone," she says warily, stuffing the device back into her jeans. "Sorry…but yes. I mean, no…I'm not…busy. So yes, we can work on the project."

He nods in between taking off his shoes at the entranceway and placing them in a designated shoe cubby. Elsa pays him little mind and moves over to the model, her smile coming back at the wondrous generosity Anna had left her prior to leaving.

Is there anyone in this world as selfless as her sister? The blonde highly doubts it.

She feels before she sees her classmate near her, finally standing so she can see him from her peripherals and hearing a sharp whistle emit from his lips as he stares down at a very different model he had left the day prior.

"Geez Elsa…" he mutters, a finger coming up to brush the realistic bluffs and terraces jutting out and proudly and almond eyes grazing through painted shimmering waters. "Thought you said art wasn't your forte? If this isn't a forte, I'm kind of afraid to see what you'd classify a forte as…"

Elsa bites back a chuckle and instead smirks pronouncedly. "Anna helped me make it," she says softly, her own gaze going through everything—every effort, every time spent, each swish of a thorough brush and deliberate cut of a styrofoam—and feeling gratefulness borne with so much pride. She wants to say her sister did it…because truly, she did…but the blonde kills the words as they bubble in her chest. "She's an art major…" She's not quite sure why she added that in, but she surmises it's just her brain and heart agreeing with one thing (such a rare occurrence) and that is they miss her with every ounce of their being and talking about her out loud is just a form of validation…that she and Anna are together…that the smaller girl made this not because she needed help or anything like that, but because the redhead wanted to. Just…wanted to. Simple. Easy. No ulterior motives. Simply…Anna.

She truly is one of a kind.

Kareem nods, but she isn't paying attention.

"Where are the others?" she asks instead, her eyes going back to the door as if it'll open in its own volition after her query.

"I told them that we'll meet up at four."

She looks up at the clock that read barely three and then looks back at almond eyes gazing at her almost concentratedly. "Would you like me to remedy that and ask them to come sooner?" she asks although she already knows the answer.

He only smiles back at her, leaning over the edge of the model's perimeter with his long bronze arms casually. "Art major…" he says softly, eyes dragging back to the dips of land and cliffs. "NYU? Or…Columbia?" He shakes his head in disagreement just as her stomach plummets into unknown depths. "Has to be NYU!" he exclaims, his eyes going back to her. "Your dad went to NYU, right? NYU School of Law?"

She steps back automatically, her throat and mouth drying up and her heart thudding frantic palpitations in her eardrums. Her mind is running a mile a minute, disbelief coursing through every word coming out of her classmate's mouth. She only has half a mind to shake her head. In refute? In disagreement? She's not sure. All she knows is she needs time…and space.

A silent mantra keeps repeating in her buzzing brain: she can't be hearing this properly.

Kareem maintains his spot beside the model, his eyes still boring holes into her and his expression showing blatant thinking…as if he's a child, trying to piece a puzzle together that he already knows the answer to. "No…your dad didn't go to NYU?" he asks, and they both know it's not really a question. He straightens up, puts his hands in his pockets and from his height he seems almost…intimidating. "Because my dad went to NYU…" he continues, walking towards her deliberately slowly. "After graduation he…he became an associate at Blake Shelton and Zhang. That was right around the time your dad became a senior partner in the same firm…if my memory serves me correctly. My dad…he…he really looked up to your father. Was kinda sad when Mr. Andersen decided to make a career change to being a state judge, but didn't fault him for it."

Three feet separate them, the air thinning around her more and more. She tries to breathe, but the block lodged in her throat makes it impossible. She tries to grasp for any rational retort, but comes up empty handed. Her tongue feels heavy in her arid mouth and every part of her is gathering up the courage to do one of two options when backed against the wall: fight or flight?

"Two years ago, my dad became senior partner at Blake Shelton and Zhang," Kareem continues, stopping at the two feet mark and staring down at her seriously. "Your dad…I'm not sure if you know, but regardless of him leaving, he was still pretty close to the company. I'm sure if there had been any legal squabbles, they'd be his representative and that says a lot. He was actually quite communicative with my dad even after he left. Anyway, when my dad became senior partner, they threw him this lavish party during Christmas. It was winter break so of course I was at home back in New York and my dad brought the entire family to the event. In that five hour timeframe, I got to meet your dad, your mom, and your sister…Anna."

Elsa has the biggest urge to throw up, and she finds she can no longer lock eyes with the tall boy, her gaze falling into the ground between them.

"She probably doesn't remember me," he says airily, continuing the monologue that would inevitably annihilate her way of living. "She didn't seem like she wanted to be there…not that I could blame her. After trying out all the expensive food, listening to the inane chatter seemed like you were paying for your meal tenfold. Anna had a good idea though. She just…left. I wish I could've just done that…"

"What do you want?" Her voice comes out rugged in her ears…aggressive. She looks back up, pins her eyes on almonds that widen almost infinitesimally at her sudden demeanor and searches her classmate's face for something—an ulterior motive, a wicked plan. Something. "What do you want Kareem?" she asks again when silence greets her half-question, half-demand.

Her hands have balled into inadvertent fists, nails leaving indentations she can't feel in her palms. The fact that her body is shaking uncontrollably doesn't even faze her. Only one thing grazes her mind: she'll protect Anna. It doesn't matter what happens to her in this situation…the only important thing is that her sister remains unscathed.

Unexpectedly enough, the tall boy's hands suddenly come up in front of him in a definite passive manner, his eyes widening by each passing second and now he's the one backing up, three steps, five…until about seven or eight feet separate them. For some reason, this small action makes the air breathable again.

"Shit Elsa…" he curses under his breath, shaking his head and remorse splashing on his visage. "I…didn't mean to come off…aggressive…or anything," he says slowly, hand coming up to his hair to scratch the back of his head. "Informative…maybe, but…shit…Can…can we start this whole thing over?"

Her own fingers are coming out of a strained fist, her index finger and thumb coming up to her eyes and squeezing the throb beginning to pulse from the constant frown that's found its home there since this conversation began.

"What is it that you want Kareem?" she asks again, only this time an octave softer…with an edge of control.

The young man's mouth opens, then closes, as if finding purchase in words that seem to have disappeared when moments ago they were in mass abundance. "I just…I just wanted you to know…that I know," he says and adds a shrug as if it really is that simple. "I mean…shit Elsa…if I wanted something bad to happen I could've as easily asked everyone to come in early and witness this, right? Ben…fuck, that guy would have a field day."

Just the thought of everyone knowing would blow everything out of the water…

Elsa breathes the shallow air. Finding her legs are losing strength she looks behind her, sees that her work table chair is just a couple feet away and crumple into it, both palms coming up to rub the stress from her face and thumbs working deep circles into both temples.

"Yesterday…you…you remember what I said, right?"

She looks back up to him as he stands uneasily in the middle of the still haphazard room, almond eyes gazing at her with a mix of wariness and consternation.

"It doesn't matter…truly," he continues, licking his lips in afterthought. "As you said…it's your life and it's private information, therefore no one else has any claim to it."

"Then why bring this up?" she ask stonily, eyes locking with his morosely. "Why bring this up unless it's something you can use as leverage?"

"I wish you'd stop thinking everyone's like that when only a handful of people want to see the world burn."

"The world I live in and the one you're in are quite different. Mine could be burning while yours can have sunshine and rainbows. Still doesn't mean we're not in the same place."

He breathes a heavy inhale, fingers coming up to scratch the back of his head once more as he gives her a serious look. It seems he's come up with a viable answer. "Regardless," he continues, voice hard and insistent. "There's…there's no ulterior motive Elsa. I…I have no idea how I can prove that to you. I wanted you to know that I know. I knew ever since you opened the door yesterday and Anna was standing right next to you. I didn't say anything to our classmates then and I won't say anything until you decide to. And since this is a secret that is best left buried, that's how it'll stay.

"I…There's talk in the classroom that you've turned down AECOM and Populous. Can I get your confirmation on that?"

The sudden turn in conversation leads the blonde somewhat confused, but she doesn't show it outwardly. She just nods, assuming nonchalance until she can get a good, clear ground as to where this whole thing is going and she can control it with every ounce of her ability.

"I'll be going back to New York after the end of term," she says simply.

"Have you looked at any internship opportunities there?"

She wants to pull her hair in utter frustration, but stops herself. She only shakes her head in disagreement. "Been too busy to even begin."

He nods in assumed understanding, his gaze falling to the balcony and the currently atrocious sizzling day outside. "My mom has an architectural firm," he says shortly. "Bartam and Singh. That's where I'll be doing my internships after. Like I said before, my dad…he really did respect your father. As far as I know my mom got to know Mr. Andersen in association back when my dad was still a junior associate of sorts to for him and they got to be pretty good friends from then—allies at the very least.

"They've known that we've shared the same graduating class for the longest time. From the start they've asked me extend an invitation for you to fulfill your externship hours at my mom's company. After…after your parents' accident, they've pretty much forced my hand to ask you to at least consider it. You won't need an interview or anything like that. I've…I can vouch for your work ethic and study habits far better than any length of an interview can. If nothing else, you're…you're brilliant. You'd be a wonderful asset…even if you'd choose not to join the firm after…considering my mom and her partner would probably want to hire you at the culmination of it."

Elsa's gaze falls to the ground beneath her, her hand still rubbing rough circles along her forehead, eyes, and temples. This conversation has certainly turned into a street she would never, in her life, expect.

"Elsa…"

She looks up, a reflex to being called upon and watches him warily as he makes his way towards her.

"Can I…Can I sit down? Like…next to you. Not looking down at you or anything? Can we just…sit and talk?"

Her jaw clamps, anger at herself and the situation filling her overworked mind, but she's able to nod nonetheless, willing to let this go on if it means continued silence on her classmate's end.

Kareem pulls the chair Haley had occupied the night prior and sits, elbows placed on both thighs and eyeing her warily.

A question that's been buzzing in her brain since the too open invitation flies out of her mouth, and she remains unapologetic because she's never one to beat around the bush especially or maybe because of this dire situation that's been placed upon her and, more importantly, Anna. "Is this an ultimatum?"

Almond eyes widen first, followed by the high rise of black eyebrows and vigorous, vehement shakes of a head. "No! Elsa…no!" He's the one rubbing his face now, exasperation ebbing through sheer body language. "Can…can we forget that I know about you and Anna for a second?"

"I can't forget it if that's all that's important to me." She sees that he's genuinely taken aback by the hardness of her words, but maintains direct eye contact with him. "You knowing this can end everything. Let's…stop pretending that it's not important because it is. You wouldn't have brought it up otherwise. In the end all I care about is Anna's wellbeing. If you tell me your silence costs an internship at your mother's company then so be it. If it's only a start of many things to come, fine. Leave Anna out of it and I'll do everything willingly—

"Will you stop?!"

She does, but only because of such a violent outburst and just as angry countenance from her usually calm peer. He stands up again, pacing in the small space between them.

"I shouldn't have said anything," he mutters, mostly to himself, but loud enough for her to hear it upon strained ears. "So stupid…of course she'd tunnel vision on it…" He sighs loudly, stops just as abruptly, and turns to her, expression direly solemn. "This wasn't an ultimatum," he says evenly, as if speaking to a child. "Telling you I know about you and your sister wasn't a start to a threat. I'm not…will you get it out of your head that everyone is against you? For once…can you please treat another peer like…a peer—a classmate? Not competition. Not a stepping stone towards another goal—just…" He stops and breathes another steady intake of air as his face falls to helplessness. "Look Elsa…we've been sharing a classroom together for four years. You have a target on your back as the best. I get it. But you're looking at this all wrong. I stayed up last night planning on telling you that I know with the end result of you acknowledging that it's a non-issue, but apparently it came out all wrong. You said it best. It's your life. It's your business. It has nothing to do with me, therefore it shouldn't matter. It doesn't. It's a moot point and frankly, I don't give a shit if you and your sister are shacking. I'm going to put that out there right now to hopefully abstain you from any more of this nonsense.

"My parents asked me to extend an invitation to Bartam and Singh for the duration of your internship. My mom figured that after your parents' unforeseen deaths that you'd want to come home as quickly as term's end and would unwillingly give up any and all internship opportunities here. Her firm is no AECOM or Populous, but it is a legitimately good company with good standings and history in New York's economy. She genuinely wants to help. I genuinely want to help. You've been dealt a shit hand and you're…you're fucking brilliant. You can have any company you want here. You can probably have any internship you want there…but this is an extending of an olive branch…if you'd like to look at it that way. My parents adored the Andersens. If you could even consider this, they'd probably feel less indebted somehow…even though I have no idea why they'd feel this way in the first place."

He's breathing heavily by the end of his long tirade, and she can only swallow back the shame and rough patch currently riding her throat, his words ricocheting in the walls of her mind.

"Please think it over. I don't expect an answer today. I don't expect a positive answer at all to be honest…but the invitation's there…if you'd take it." He gives her another searching gaze, looking as if he wants to add more, but in the end deciding not to with a pronounced shake of the head. "I'm gonna text the others that we're meeting early." He looks away, towards the model for a brief moment, and then gives her a small, weak smile. "Tell Anna thank you…for what she did to the model. Apparently sheer brilliance runs in the family…"

She can't answer back. She finds that she's lost all semblance of speech. All that buzzes in her mind is that someone knows. She's heard of the expression that the world is a small place, but hasn't experienced its precise meaning until this very day.

Small and getting smaller…

What can she do? How can she control this? How can she protect Anna if this all blows to hell? The quick and easy answer leaves a bitter taste in her mouth.

She can't.

It's not in her power or control. It's not up to her. In the end she can only trust her classmate's words. As a person with good judge of character, she can't see any outward malice. Kareem seems genuinely indifferent about…her secret. But it doesn't help that she has zero leverage. One wrong sentence and everything could be upended. One disagreement could lead into Anna's life falling apart…and that end result is not something she's ever willing to compromise.

His footsteps gather her attention, and she eyes him pocketing his phone before giving her a nonchalant look. "They'll be here between fifteen minutes and a half an hour."

She doesn't care about that.

"How do I know you'll keep your word?" She can feel her lips setting in a firm line, brows notched impossibly deep, but she can't hold back the dilemma trying to claw its way out of her chest.

He merely gives her another helpless smile. "You don't," he shrugs, his clear voice resounding in the silent room. "You'll just have to learn how to trust me."

She swallows audibly, not liking the answer one bit.

O—O—O

Anna's quite sure of one thing: no one really gets a decent rest while traveling in a plane. It's an impossibility. It doesn't matter that the seats are heated and leather and that the hot towels and free drinks are in abundance. No one can get a decent hour's rest in a plane. Not even the guy a seat behind her snoring as loudly as the jet's turbines.

She sighs, the sound drowned out easily by the surrounding noise. Looking up at the screen before her that shows there's just a bit of an hour left before touchdown, she puts her noise canceler ear buds back on and mutes everything around her. She leans forward, turns off the screen, and directs her attention to the darkness outside. She can't see anything. No stars. No clouds. No land. Just a reflection of herself that seems off somehow.

It feels as if she's just waking up from a lovely dream and every mile separating her and Elsa becomes the metaphorical nudge and pull at her shoulders to open her eyes and address reality.

She wishes like a naive child to keep sleeping, but if her sister's taught her anything, it's that reality needs to be addressed. They're not children anymore, even if she wishes to go back to those carefree days. Even then, she wouldn't have Elsa as she has her now if she were to go back…and that option, in and of itself, is really no option at all.

The last five years comes back, as they're wont do when she's given the time to contemplate the universe. It doesn't come very often: being forced to just sit and think. Being stuck in a flying contraption does that though. Unlike forty-eight hours prior, when she had been stuck in this exact same position albeit flying to her sister instead of away, her thoughts weren't very collected. On the contrary they were scattered bordering murderous; whoever she saw in that webcam was going to have a rude awakening.

She and jealousy aren't very familiar friends. Sure she's felt the cold grips of that relentless mistress before, but not the way it had seized her just a couple days prior. Thinking had been impossible…as if there was no room left for anything but what awaited her, what she would do, what she would say, how she would act.

And really, that was the problem of the matter, right? Her innate ability to act first and think later?

Well, here's the opportunity, her mind seems to say in a mocking way, causing an outward eye roll to herself that no one else can see.

Addressing reality and all its forms…

"Are you sure?"

Elsa's voice filters through her mind again, light blue eyes gazing at her in absolute reverence.

Anna had promised herself six weeks to think of her feelings for her sister. She felt any less time than that and she would be jumping the gun as she's done in relationships prior. As she had mentioned to Kristoff, this isn't something she's willing to do—Elsa's feelings are more important to her than some random girl that may or may not last more than one night, one week, or one month. There's certainly more at stake considering this is her sister. But really, if she were to be completely honest, that aspect feels like the most minor detail of her decision making. It really has no bearing at all. Is it a sheltered thought? Yes…but it's not as if either of them are hurting anyone else by loving one another…

She focuses on it…this one aspect that feels like a ridiculous roadblock. Why is it looked down upon? Morally…biblically…sharing a bed with a relative is sinful…wrong. There's an even bigger dilemma when there's inbreeding involved and even more-so for guardian to ward relationships—huge age differences where an outsider can't help, but feel that there may or may have been statutory rape, jailbait, nonconsensual sex—all illegal bearings—involved…all of which make this the taboo topic that it is. None of which applies to her or Elsa.

They're both well over the legal adult age. There's zero chance they could reproduce considering they're missing a vital reproductive system. They're both quite aware of the relationship—everything is consensual, and, as naive as it sounds, there's love involved. Actual love. Not just lust, even though that barrier is easily and frequently crossed enough, but straightforward, unadulterated love.

It's not the first time the unfairness of their situation strikes the smaller girl. How can something that feels so right have to be relegated behind closed doors? And of course she's not implying the sex. That aspect in any relationship should be kept private. It's the little things…the parts Elsa was drilling in to her stubborn head not very many hours back. Because she doesn't want to keep what they have a dirty little secret. It's not. And she's quite adamant of that. Elsa's not a secret she's willing to hide away from the world because it's convenient for them. She wants to be able to kiss her goodbye before boarding a plane. She wants to keep her close and hold her hands while they're walking to a destination. How is it possible to live in a world where acceptance for any form of love is not just hard, but looked down upon? The utter stupidity of the question is enough to drive her to insanity. The fact that it has nothing to do with anyone else is just adding salt to the wound.

She draws in a deep breath, the stifling confines of the plane making the air feel thinner than it actually is. She flags a stewardess, asks for some water, and gulps it down as soon as it's handed to her.

Leaning into the leather seat, her eyes lock onto the ceiling: the space in between the call button and the personal nightlight. She thinks back to the two weeks and the kiss that preceded it, wanting more than anything to gather her thoughts and push away the frustration from her earlier musings.

And yet another case to the ever growing pile of evidence that she acts before she thinks.

The kiss.

It wasn't planned. She didn't wake up that morning thinking she'd try her best to make it as difficult as possible for the older girl to leave. She just wanted to prolong their time together because they were both quite aware of how minimal it was, and shrinking by the literal second. Each minute that passed felt like the return of the shadow that had been a constant companion the last five years, its grip on her heart so viselike and familiar that it could do nothing more to scare her than just be there.

Her tether to sanity was leaving. Her only tangible source of happiness was going away…again. So of course, with perfect timing, the last five years of emptiness refreshed itself in her mind.

It didn't matter that her parents had been there to catch her as she was falling at breakneck speed straight into impending disaster. It mattered even less that many of her classmates expressed her changes, some quite vocally and others with more tact. All that was apparent to her was the one constant of her life, since her very first memory, has all but erased herself from her life, with nary an explanation or word. More than the void, that had stung the most.

Elsa, her constant, was gone. She had lost her best friend and sister and wasn't even given the opportunity to fight for it. Because of course she would fight! Tooth and nail—with every part of her being. She would convince the older girl that shutting her out was the worst idea in the world and that open communication trumped broken silences.

And she knows…a part of her is so sure…that if Elsa had confessed her not so sisterly feelings five years ago that they'd be in the same situation now, albeit with less heartbreak. There's absolutely nothing the older girl can do to make Anna look at her in a different light. It's impossible for her vision to be tainted when Elsa was, and always will be, the perfect older sister. The redhead's childhood memories are brimming with the blonde: the bickers, the laughter, the fights, the adoration. As with everything, it's easier to see it all in retrospect. During their childhood she couldn't see that Elsa had always looked after her—protected her in the ways only an older sibling can. She couldn't see that the blonde always put her wants first and foremost, fulfilled every fancy and passing whim with sometimes just a small word of caution.

Anna's sure she fell in love with her sister even before she was quite aware of it—even before the taller girl left for college. That stupid saying that you don't know what you have until you lose it…It feels like the hallmark motto of her life. They were close. Closer than any siblings she'd ever seen, yet it never dawned on her the whys. It was normal…just…normal. If she had been told she was hurting Elsa in the matter of non-reciprocation, the only other justifiable answer would be to reciprocate with every part of her being. Because hurting Elsa is not an option. She'd rather give up on the world than the one person who has never given up on her.

Less importantly, but also worth noting is the ever present thought of how reciprocation would feel like. She knows emotionally that nothing would change. Elsa loves her and she loves the taller girl with just as much ferocity. Physically though…

It was really the only way to get a clear and definite answer. How would her body feel in the midst of a kiss? She had the strongest feeling she wouldn't back away from it…On the contrary, just the mere thought of it was enough to spike the helplessness out from her chest only to be replaced with nagging curiosity and excitement.

These thoughts plagued her all the way to the airport that morning: a cracked dam that's grown tired of keeping everything back. Six weeks to think it through? Laughable. All she needed was to be in a win it all or lose it all situation to open her eyes to the blatant obviousness staring at her in the face. And of course no words are available. Of course they wouldn't come to her aid even in the form of rambling gibberish. And of course…of course it had to be like some stupid romcom where they're a bit late for Elsa's domestic flight and some disembodied voice has to call her name through the speakers to get her further away faster from the smaller girl than was already being painfully permitted.

And Anna couldn't let her go…not without letting her know…so she did. Articulateness flew through the window since they woke up, so words were as unavailable as refreshing water in the desert. Action then…because it always spoke louder than words.

Did she think it through before actually doing it? Of course not. She wouldn't be Anna if she thought of the consequences prior to the action…And it had been worth it. The kiss said everything she wanted to say without her having to do it. What she didn't bank on was that the reciprocation was heady. Up until that point in time, it didn't really cross her mind how much Elsa's wanted her. Oh they've spoken about it, and she's seen first hand the desire and lust clouding ever present light blue eyes, but it didn't click until that very moment when all she could taste was desperation coated with so much longing. Her feelings felt utterly small in comparison—a blip in the middle of a raging storm. But that was okay…because after the six weeks, they could explore and be frank with one another, and in due time, she'll match how much Elsa loves her to a tee.

She'd made her decision that morning in the midst of calming her racing heart and watching the most important person in her life leave her again.

A significant part of her wanted to talk to her sister about it. The kiss…as they both so eloquently titled the event. But even she knew when something was serious enough to merit a face to face talk rather than through a phone call or even Skype. So…it was formally decided for them to do so at the culmination of their six week separation. She also had an inkling Elsa planned this so that the smaller girl could still break away if she wanted to…as if it was a spur of the moment mistake that they can just sweep under the rug—no harm, no foul.

What the blonde does and decides always goes back to her. This recurring theme is both a relief and an annoyance because it fights the very nature of law when it comes to how she thinks her sister would act.

Elsa would act as if the kiss didn't happen if, in the end, it benefited the redhead in some form or another. If, for some reason (even though she started it), Anna decides to back away in the last minute, the blonde would give her that. If she wants to romp all the five out of fives in New York, apparently that's fine, so long as Anna's happy. If bringing another girl in the relationship makes things easier for her (and never for Elsa)…it can happen. This double standard—that it's okay so long as she's happy, doesn't sit well with the smaller girl. She just hopes that in due time, the blonde would see that her happiness has a direct line to her sister's…and if one of them is unhappy for one reason or another, then the other is just as affected. There's no gray area. At least there shouldn't be. It's preposterous to think that she'd want someone else like the older girl while already being with her. She'd see red if some other knock off were to suddenly replace her as a public lover in Elsa's life…there's no difference if it was turned the other way around.

Together. Just the two of them. She wonders if this is imbedded in her sister's mind now after their talk or if the thought still lingers there…as a backup safety precaution to be used for her own benefit, but never Elsa's. The smaller girl figures she'll just have to jackhammer the thought process into the blonde's head until it finally sticks. God knows both of them can be super stubborn in any differing opinion, the apple not falling far from the tree and all.

"Ladies and gentlemen we are fifteen minutes away from JFK International Airport…"

She lets the pilot's voice pass over her head, too unimportant to listen and assimilate the words amidst the storm of thoughts already filled to the brim in her busy mind. She takes her phone out of airport mode, texts Elsa first of her impending landing and promising a Skype call at eleven on the dot. Currently it's nearing nine and she isn't planning on staying at Kristoff's for longer than necessary. A voicemail she's expecting from Kai confirms that he's done as she's asked two days prior: leave her motorcycle parked in one of the lots and leave the keys, helmet, and a jacket in a designated locker in the airport for her to fish out when she lands.

Thirty minutes later has her in front of a familiar door, rapping on its wooden surface in a musical beat and hearing the footsteps approaching before the pull of the door.

"Hey, hey!"

The familiar welcoming greet pulls her lips into an easy smile, Kristoff making room for her as she passes the threshold.

"Hey yourself," she replies, looking forward and giving a small wave to Sven who's currently on the recliner, watching television. "Evening Sven."

"Hey Anna," he greets, taking a swig of a bottle of beer clasped in his hand while giving her a nod. The dim lighting of the living-room makes his dark brown hair look closer to black, the sweatpants and white t-shirt he's adorning leaving him looking quite at home.

"How's residency?" she asks conversationally, walking just behind the sofa and leaning on it casually with Kristoff at her side.

"It's brutal," he groans, his free hand coming upon brown eyes and squeezing them tiredly. "I'm on-call these next two weeks…You wouldn't believe how many dental emergencies there are in the middle of the night. Yesterday, there was this woman who fell…down her stairs or something—sounds like a domestic dispute honestly, but anyway…she broke her jaw and her teeth got wedged into her gums—

"Alright!" she cuts off quickly enough, sending the two brothers into an easy chuckle. "I'll…listen to you scary stories some other time…"

"I'm going to make you abide to that raincheck," Sven retorts with an exaggerated wink, and toasts his beer up in the air as a sign of goodwill.

She grins at him before looking over to Kristoff who wordlessly nods her to the direction of his office. Walking ahead of him, she makes her way to the already lit room and proceeds to sit on one of the plush armchairs, watching the blond close the door behind him before taking his spot right next to her.

"Ah crap. Forgot…" he mutters, getting up simultaneously. "Water? Coke? Beer—no, not beer…"

Anna laughs and waves her hand dismissively. "None. I…kind of want to go home as soon as possible."

"Yeeesh! Still smitten I see. You'd think after Skyping with Elsa the whole weekend—

"I was in LA the whole weekend."

Brown eyes widen at the sudden cut off, but more importantly what she just said. "Planned?"

"Definitely not."

He sighs before motioning for her to continue wordlessly.

She laughs, somewhat embarrassed now that she knows the whole story and has to retell it, but she does regardless starting with Friday night, at being forced to go to a party that she could care less about, at being set up with a girl she could care even less about, at how introspective she's been in regards to her present self versus her past self, and most importantly the growing frustration that culminated to a quick decision that had nothing to do with thinking and more doing.

"You couldn't have just called her?"

"I saw red Kristoff," she mutters, eyes looking over her nail beds in what she hopes looks to be a nonchalant manner. "All my mind kept feeding me was that Elsa and I weren't really together and she's not in the wrong if there's some random chick in her apartment. Still didn't stop me from getting riled up and making me unnecessarily angry…"

"Because it's not like she belonged to you."

"Yes."

"And going there personally would alleviate that?"

"It did when I made out with Elsa in front of the chick in her house."

The small slap from Kristoff's palm to his face resounded across the quiet room in tandem to his loud groan. "Anna…"

She couldn't help but chuckle at the exasperation coating his voice. "Yeah?"

"What…" He stops, centers himself, and looks at her quite seriously. "What happened to thinking it over? Giving it the next several weeks to stew over your emotions and—

"I'm sure of what I want."

There must be something in her expression or the tone of her voice because he only looks at her with still pursed lips before leaning back into his armchair and nodding at her to continue.

"I…you know everything Kristoff," she starts, her gaze falling to the darkened window that shows absolutely nothing of the world outside. It's just like looking outside from the plane all over again. "You know what these last two weeks has taught me, if anything? The same lesson the last five years has drilled into my head. I don't care if it's unhealthy or doesn't sound right. Life without Elsa isn't a life worth living. You know what the weirdest thing is? This point is even more punctuated now. Not in the first year of that dreaded time period or the jaded portion when I wanted to hate her, but I couldn't. Now. Today. Even when I see and talk to her everyday it doesn't feel enough. Even when I know she makes time for me and only me…I just end up wanting more. The only time my mind wasn't constantly thinking that was during the last two days, but that was only because I was with her.

"It's such a strange phenomenon." She feels her voice getting quieter with each word, but knows without having to look at her friend that he's able to hear and is listening quite intently to everything she's saying. "Like…without her I'm this free form. And this seems like a really good thing. I'm free. I can be whomever I want to be. I can go where I please and I can do what I want. But at the end of the day…I'm not tethered to her, so the freedom means absolutely nothing. And people would think, maybe it doesn't have to be her…but it does. She's the constant. She's always been the constant. She was there through every portion of my less than stellar life and I didn't realize how much she was giving me until she couldn't give anymore without something from within herself giving out."

She looks back towards thoughtful brown eyes, staring at her with utmost concentration. "In your most honest opinion—now that you've met her and she's more than a one dimensional character built up from my complaints, frustrations, and elations…Do you think there's anyone in this world who can love me like she does? And likewise, do you think it's possible for me to find someone who can make me feel even an ounce of what she can incite with just one look?"

Kristoff's tongue darts out to rewet dry lips, a heavy hand coming up to brush his bangs back. "That's a hard question Anna…"

The redhead shrugs, the answer in her mind quick and simple. "Me not finding someone to fill the void isn't for the lack of trying. You, me, and that overfilled green binder is a testament to that. Terra…fit all of the criteria and she would've been perfect if I just wanted a shadow of who Elsa is. But I don't want a shadow. The last five years have been nothing but meaningless shadows. I don't want someone like her. I want her. I don't know why it's taken me this long to figure this out. I don't know why she and I had to hurt so much to arrive to such a simple solution that absolves all our problems.

"Freedom is overrated. I don't want it if it means not having her to fall back into. I'd rather lose all my freedom and be connected to her the way we are now than go back to being just her sister. It goes in the same vein as that whole 'eating the forbidden fruit' thing. I know what I've been missing, I can't turn back, and I don't want to. I don't want to change anything…except the distance. I want her here…or me there. I don't care which one, so long as she's beside me and not across internet or phone lines.

"It doesn't take six weeks to get to this conclusion. It's been pretty much decided when Elsa confessed her feelings…it was just a matter of time for me to finally get on the same page."

It's silent in the room so she hears the audible swallow that her friend makes after her tell-all, and she can't help but chuckle lowly and helplessly at such an ominous sound.

"Has my decision changed your opinion of me?" She doesn't take the question back, but it doesn't alleviate the sudden gnawing pit in the bottom of her stomach.

Brown eyes roll in exasperation. "Don't be stupid," he scoffs, sending her chuckle to transform into a free laugh and the gaping hole to disappear. He shares a crooked smile. "If you were in my shoes and was able to see yourself speak about Elsa, your current decision would've been the most clear and obvious one," he says with a knowing smirk taking Anna somewhat aback. "I've heard you speak about countless girls Anna. Most of them are flattering, but there's always something lacking. As you said…freedom without a tether. Even when you were with Jenna, it was palpable. Like…you already knew what you wanted, but you wanted to knock all the possibilities out of the water first before actually setting the decision to stone. Again, because this is Elsa it's important that you think not only about yourself, but her own well-being. And it's not to say you didn't care about your past partners, but you didn't care about them this deeply. Makes sense…they're not your sister. But at the end of the day, you and I both know it's not even that. That's merely a title. If she were just any other girl who's been a constant in your life…like a childhood best-friend—

"I would've courted her when I was in middle school."

Kristoff laughs, nodding in guffawing agreement. "You would've put a ring on it—

"In middle school."

She grins as his laughter doubles, a small part of her flashing in relief that her best-friend who also happens to be her therapist isn't just accepting of this insanely unacceptable (according to their world), but unmistakably large and unapologetic part of her.

When the mirth passes, his serious face comes back, his next question predictable. "What're you gonna do now? Going from this whole distance thing?"

The redhead sighs, leaning against the armchair, unaware that she had been sitting ramrod straight since the beginning of their session. "We're still going to do the adult thing and finish up what we started. After that though I'm not letting her go. Screw the world…I won't let another day pass that I'm not with her."

Kristoff sighs, dare she say it, dreamily? Before she can berate him for probably starting something she doesn't want to quite hear, a knock issues from the door, Sven's voice coming from outside of it and forcing both of their attention to flicker to its direction.

"Yeah, come in Sven," Kristoff calls, the door opening momentarily.

Sven's eyes first flickers to his brother and then to Anna. "Come outside…I think you might want to see this."

Her eyebrows stitch into an inadvertent frown, her therapist giving her a shrug before getting up from his chair and following the two of them out of the office. She only notices that it's late—the eleven o'clock news has just started and she promised Elsa she'd contact her prior. Sven pushes the volume up, gathering her attention to the news anchor: a blonde woman with too much make-up and sporting a red blazer to match just as red lipstick.

"…only a couple of weeks ago on May 10th," the anchorwoman states in a steady beat. "All of New York still mourns over the loss of the just judge Alexander Andersen and the brilliant senator Helene Andersen. In a surprising twist of what will most likely be a view of a change in times, conservative Senator Andersen's motion to change a nearly one hundred year old law in New York State has raised some eyebrows and even more-so vehement opposition.

"People are dubbing it 'The Next Gay Agenda', it being the unchanged codified kinship prohibition: punishment for the acts of sexual activity between lineal ancestor to descendant, siblings, and extended family. Currently, only a few states have leniency over this matter. Rhode Island has completely repealed all incest criminal statutes, Ohio targets only parental figures, and New Jersey applies penalties only for parties seventeen years and younger. According to close sources Senator Andersen, prior to her death, had been tirelessly working to change New York's prohibition degree on kinship to make it similar to New Jersey's, that is if both parties are over the consenting age, incest is thereby unpunishable by law. The first committee hearing is scheduled on June 21st. Currently, New York has a maximum penalty of twenty years imprisonment if convicted."

"'The Next Gay Agenda'?" the male anchor asks with a small smirk, sending the anchorwoman shrugging.

"That's what people are dubbing it."

"Regardless, it should make for an interesting next couple of weeks."

"It sure will."

"Holy shit…"

Sven mutes the television just in time for Kristoff's expletive, but Anna doesn't hear it. She can only stand there in mute horror, widened eyes searching a silent television for answers.

She's not sure what any of this means. She's not sure what kind of consequences this will inevitably bring her and, more importantly, Elsa. She knows for sure that her mom never mentioned this in her presence. She also knows that Helene would've wanted complete control over this subject matter—a moot point now that she's deceased.

One thought repeats in a frantic mantra, silent screams echoing in her mind: how will this affect her and her sister?

AN: Hi! Yay, a plot? We're here? Yes…we're finally here. Hahaha. Umm…well first, sorry for the lack of updates last week. Umm…do I have an excuse for not updating? Kind of…I guess. It was my birthday and I didn't feel like writing all week…crap that sounds like a super bad excuse. Nonetheless I do apologize, but I hope the kind of long chapter makes up for it. Extra note…I guess my mind didn't really consider last chapter to be a "real" chapter…so that's why this chappy still had Elsa's POV as a majority. Oh well…I'm breaking some rules, might as well break them all :\ I shall endeavor to get the next chapter out as soon as possible, but honestly real life has been kicking my butt recently (add in a dash of procrastination and that equals zero writing time). Hope you guys are still with me. Through thick and thin…or so they say.

dragon matt blue: :) thank you

Misiu: Just reading it once is enough! What comes next could be (I haven't written it yet) pretty bumpy.

actionpotential: Hahaha nobody ever complains about this stuff! Maybe I should just write it all out like that (joking completely).

CanITellUSmThin: I like pressing my luck in public places while reading smut. I like to think I have a really good poker face on and people just think I'm going through boring e-mail.

kimou-san: God I have no idea how to respond to all these "this was good" comments. I mean…to say thank you sounds so…dubious. But yes…thank you. I have no idea where that dom stuff came from…it popped out of my head and it went straight to paper…yeesh…

iwantaparrot1: Can't be the best smut you've read! I disallow it! There's so much out there! Glad it was…enjoyable (yeah I can't say that without shaking my head like wtf are you saying to your reviewers?) but I'll probably toe the line from here on out. Considering that you're one of the guest anonymous's that asked about not writing their first time instead…I guess I answered it for you via PM, but I'll address it here as well. The author wasn't thinking properly…She doesn't know why the second (and third I suppose) was more important than the first…but that's how she wrote it and now she's highly disappointed in herself after the fact. I still have no idea how to rectify this…hahaha.

rurupeceaue: Haha uhhh…I'll do my…best? Honestly this was a shot in the dark. First to see if I could, and second if it's something I ended up liking. Definitely the hardest thing I've written in a while—I hate sounding crass and writing a sex scene is crass at its peak. G!P stories are weird. I shall…yeah Imma put that out there. And it's too bad they're borderline all the bad things in the world…seems like it shouldn't go that far, but hey…artistic license and all right?

FreelanceBum: FUCK! NO SERIOUSLY! THE FIRST TIME I WAS LIKE SHIT YOU SPELLED THAT PERSON'S NAME WRONG (nothing trips me out more than bad spelling) SO NEXT WEEK I MAKE IT A POINT TO MAKE IT RIGHT…AND STILL, STILL. Sorry for the caps lock…and for getting the spelling of your name wrong multiple times. I shall try (with all my might) to not do that again. Gosh…the m looks like rn in my computer…-.-

Caliax: It just means you need to work on your poker face some more!

Devoted Fan: I think my work thrives on emotion and flashbacks…for some reason. I dunno…maybe trying to make it something more than it actually is /shrug. Go straight to sleep! Updates aren't that great…kind of…

Guest: :( I'm sorry last Monday wasn't very good. And this one changed to Sunday…I hope I can get back to my regular schedule.

Icy-Windbreeze: I swear, people reading these kinds of things in public places make me laugh.

Kurrent: The eloquence of your reviews always leave me baffled, so I'm sorry if this gets cut short by my inability to write good replies. Emotional growth feels like a recurring theme in all of my stories. Like…if I can get to point B and I know this character wasn't able to do this yet when they were stuck in point A it feels like I'm doing something right. I'm glad you were able to read past the smut and see the emotional value of it (not to say people didn't) but yeah…I've always favored the emotional aspect in everything favorable to the physical ones. It's certainly easier to write…

shtoops: Umm…we might not see anymore (well anytime soon I can't promise either or cuz I haven't written anything yet) dom/sub of either one. Honestly this felt like a one time thing, but apparently this story has a knack of writing whatever the hell it wants sometimes so, here's to hoping another chapter (or at least a scene) will pass through the radar.

SakuraAyanami: I feel like it's impossible for me to write based solely on their primitive urges. There has to be something emotional involved…Elsa will always find something to fret about. Seems she has her hands full in her side of the world though not as much as Anna.

barbara: I may need to write a list of this non-existent multi-chapter AU of my AU haha, although the scene that you paint there seems to be too angstsy for words. Explosive first time…yeah…would it be super awkward if I confess that it just…didn't come to mind? Cuz that's totally what happened. I feel like I dropped the ball heavy on this one…I mean…how can someone forget that? Oh god, Imma stop…imma stop right here…

Doesn't Matter42: Sorry if upon waiting for too long that you ended up reading it too many times, but I'm glad it was enjoyable. Writing smut (or erotica if that's the preferred label) exceptionally well was definitely not planned, but the positive feedback has been a good push in the right direction.

El Dragon: O.O Thank you. I swear…I really do want to come off as humbled whenever I get the "favorite or best" reviews, because I just don't see it (I'm my worst critic and all among other things), but thank you for the kind words and overall wonderful review.

kirbster676: Short secret, short angst…let's make everything short! Hahaha. Umm…I mean, I actually like prolonging angst in my other stories. It didn't work for these two (apparently) although in this fandom that may be a good thing. Churning out chapters in which they're dancing the topic will make this far longer than it already is…and it's already quite long.

Tripower: :D It's kind of surprising (and definitely sheepish worthy) that you put FwB at such a high esteem, but then again, you're the only one who's ever done a fan art for me and for that I put you in veritable high esteem as well. I miss H&M! I seriously do…I haven't visited that fandom in ages…:( When I get done with this, I seriously want to tackle another novel sized fic for that pairing. My serious OTP.

McHaudegen: I'm sorry this was hard to review. Honestly I must agree that it would've worked out fine without it, but hey…I started writing it and it avalanched to whatever last chapter was. I'm glad it translated well though. I guess it's safe to say that their first time that I failed to write or mention was definitely vanilla…but then that's just me saying it without actually proving it, which is really no point at all. As for Anna's "speech", she is definitely the more open one of the two and it stands to point that because she's the one who's new to it, she must constantly show Elsa that she's in this with her and not because she wants them to patch up w/e obstructions their past made. Elsa, although able to think this and literally dissect it like a science project, has only reticence because of having to shield the thoughts and feelings away for so long. Why am I even explaining this…I'm sure you're already quite aware…

Guest: Haha…sorry! Truly! I know it's Monday. It haunted me that it was Monday and I hadn't updated. You didn't sound rude. On the contrary you made me laugh…like the evil author that I am…Everything's okay w/ me and my family…real life just has a way of presenting itself. I'm guessing the very last review is yours too…so I'll just tag it along w/ this one. You forgot that I went to Hawaii! Definitely not the first week I missed updating, but I'll endeavor to try better next week (although gosh knows how it'll turn out).

Nocturne in A Minor: I'm going to put this out there…long reviews scare the crap out of me. I like them…don't get me wrong. But they scare me…so much, cuz I suck at constructive criticism, and if it's a long review, there's bound to be a boatload of constructive criticism. I can't seem to take it like regular people…anyway…sorry to greet you in that manner, but let's get into it. TBH as I mentioned before, I considered "Interlude" as a kind of stand alone chapter. I mean…of course you have to read all of it in order to get to that part, but reading it wasn't important to the rest of the story, although I guess you kind of miss out on some Elsa character development. Why only in Elsa's PoV? I have no idea…The more I reply to people, the more I feel as if maybe last chapter was a half assed effort, but I promise it really wasn't. And I'm quite aware of Anna's lack of perspective, but maybe I should just scrap all of it and do it on both of their perspective…and do their first time cuz apparently that was all wrong too…Huh…/sigh…I feel like I kinda let people down last chapter HAHAHA. Aww…anyway…umm Anna…We're delving into her psyche next chapter. Kinda went in it on this one and I'm not sure if that's enough. The plot might take it elsewhere and it might be too late to show more of her feelings (reluctance, realizations) towards her sister since they're already together. Hmm…I dropped the ball…damn it. SMH. I really don't mean to downplay Anna's PoV though. Between the two of them, it feels like she got the shorter end of the stick (as she did in the movie) and I guess I just didn't show the progression of her feelings good enough. Regardless, I'm going to stop my blather because I have a feeling it's not coming out very well. I do appreciate the review (truly) and I hope to do a better job within the allowable timeframe/PoV.

kenfromnhus: Thank you. Glad the smut was better than most you've read.