Hey hey everyone! Any of you finished class yet? I've pretty much finished university now, which feels weird having all this free time.
Is anyone a Nine Inch Nails fan? Managed to go to their gig this year? I did and they were just fab! Trent has also been working out, check out those guns ;D
Anyway onto the chapter! For this one we have Old Pine by Ben Howard :3
Chapter 13 -
Old Pine
I'm led on my back, mouth open eyes closed and head hanging back. My skin tingles and I feel a little nervous. The arms of the leather seat confine me and I cringe at the pain to come.
Nope not even that kind of pain.
A strangled moan came embarrassingly from my throat when my dentist began to unscrew and tug off the wire that is my braces.
I didn't even need to listen to know that Kenny was repressing chuckles from his seat at the back of the room.
Lucky perfect teethed bastard, well, minus a couple of crooks, but you could hardly see those.
Afterwards she washed out and cleaned my teeth, which stung like she'd crushed ice into them.
"Okay Mr. Tucker you can sit up now" Mrs. Zavrazhnov told me. I just call her Mrs. Z because I will never pronounce that. Her thick Russian accent always made feel like I should be sat at a circled table, a poker game at hand and a black suit on my body with a machete under my waist coat. Smoke would fan about us all making everything tinge grey and misty. A stiff drink on the rocks that would glisten back at me through the thick atmosphere with a smile on its face, as if it knew it was the cure to all my woes.
"Craig you fuck head move!" Kenny shoves me and I stumble. I smiled meekly over at my dentist and take my leave, and can't stop running my tongue over my smooth teeth like I'd never not had braces.
"...Sorry" I mumbled and followed him out with the mental reminder of needing to pick up my braces tomorrow.
Clyde had been gone for five days, five very painfully long days and it wasn't necessarily because I loved him and that I missed him that it hurt so bad, I just didn't know why, and slowly, this sadness was turning into plain old anger.
Kenny loved it and reminded me every now and then why I was pissed at Clyde.
My other blonde friend hadn't spoken to me since the break-up, and I don't think we'll get to be as close as what we were, for Tweek's sake at least.
I drove my banana to Tooties and dab in some fancy ass ice cream and waffles.
"So when you going to phone him?" He pulled out an Oreo from his ice cream and licked it clean before he stuffed it in his mouth. With a blink I looked into Kenny's pale round blue eyes, and then to his cat shaped mouth before back into the depths of my white chocolate ice cream, raspberries and waffle.
"Phone him? As if he'd answer, he has caller ID you know" I grumbled and plucked a couple of raspberries.
"He also has a house phone and parents who love you like you're their own kid." Kenny quirked an eyebrow and ruffled his already unkempt hair "I swear, if you want something done you have to do it yourself." He tutted and pulled out his rizzlers and began to roll, to my surprise, a tobacco filled roll up.
"What? And yeah you're right-" he cut me off by a tap of his foot. He frowned down at his yellow stained fingers "Stop being a pussy Craig."
"Woah what is with you today?" Surprise filled me and I couldn't help but feel like I'd been told off for something.
"You're not the only one affected by Clyde being a twat Craig, he's my friend too and he's hurt another of my closest friends!" His temper flared a little but he relaxed back into the chair soon enough.
I sat stunned and apologised to the little blonde. "I didn't mean to be so self centred."
Kenny shook his head dismissively and stood. I follow suit and we head home in my car.
"Just bring him back so I can boot him in the nuts." He smirked at me and I smiled at him, even if his eyes didn't seem as happy.
We entered our uni house and parted ways we greeted the others when we passed them. I took off my jacket and shoes and sat down on my bed and stared at my mobile phone.
"...Well it's not going to ring itself" with a deep breath I picked it up and called. It takes a couple of rings before it's answered and my heart skipped at the sound of his gruff voice, croaky and tired.
"Clyde, what is this?" The phone crackled with movement followed by a sharp breath
"...Craig?" He questioned.
"I said what the fuck is this!?" My voice shook and I threw off my hat in frustration.
His voice made sounds; sounds like he was trying to think of something to say and then the line went dead.
"Fuck this shit!" I slammed my fist against the wall and slumped against it.
"Is it really that bad a thought if I do like you Clyde?" I rubbed a hand over my face and dialled Clyde's home number. I knew that he wouldn't answer he always assumed that the house phone wouldn't be for him and that everyone would call him on his mobile.
It took a couple of rings; his parents were probably out back fixing the garden or shopping. I smiled at the old welcome message; it'd been awhile since I'd heard it; Clyde's ten year old voice telling everyone to leave a message.
"Hey Clyde, forgot about the house phone did you? Well you know why I'm phoning, you're the one who fucked off remember? I'm not asking for you say you love me back, or any kind of 'I don't feel that way' I just want you to get back here so I can kick your ass for all the shit you've given me these past weeks. How can you just disappear without a word after I tell you how I feel? I deserve better then that you fat assed little cunt." And with that I hung up and cringed at the thought of his mum eventually hearing that message and the fact that I'd used that word.
About an hour later my phone vibrated against the table and caused me and Kenny to jump and then laugh at ourselves. We sat in the front room together, the T.V on low. The sound of Kyle and Stan's chattering voices drifted out from the kitchen while they made dinner for us all.
Tweek was sat with them at the kitchen table, a cup of decafe steaming in front of him.
"Who is it?" The little blonde next to me questioned while he sipped his drink, his fingers flicked to his back pocket and the packet of tobacco that slept there.
"It's actually from Clyde" we both share a look of surprise. He stood and pulled on his old man cardigan and gestured for us to make a move to the backyard. I followed him automatically.
"What's it say?" He lit his rollie with a match and I relish the smell of burnt wood.
"He's moaning at me for calling him a cunt on the answer machine" Kenny snickered and sat back on the patio step. I plopped down next to him.
"I bet his mum flipped!" He took a drag of the green weed and blew smoke away from me.
"Yeah that's what he's complaining about" I sighed and typed back a reply: 'Come and say it to my face or are your heels too high?'
"Call him a cry baby. He'll hate that more than being called a girl." Kenny chuckled at his comment and took another drag and sighed with the bitterness. A breeze blew by and he pulled up the woollen hood to his cardigan.
Clyde's reply was a simple 'fine'.
"You know you look pretty silly right?" I quirk a brow and smirk over at Kenny. He directed his pale eyes down his body and shrugged.
"That's why I like sitting next to you" he smirked. I flipped him the bird and smiled
"Well you're wearing a sweater with rolled up shorts, flips flops, and a massive cardigan that looks like you found it in the trash." I spoke matter of factly and tugged on Kenny's raggedy cardigan.
He poked his tongue out "Says the guy who wears a woolly hat ninety percent of the year"
Behind us a lock clicked, me and Kenny both turned our heads to look through the backdoor glass. Kyle and Stan stepped out of the kitchen. We all stared as Clyde dragged his sorry ass through the front door his mother having hauled a second suitcase behind him.
Kyle and Stan stepped back into the kitchen but lingered near the doorway; I could see them opposite me.
The brunette shared a glance with his mother his eyes large and doughy. She turned smiled and waved at me. I raised a hand and wiggled my fingers back.
I am one hundred percent certain that she heard my message and slapped Clyde's ass about it.
Kenny suddenly stabbed the tip of his cigarette out on the wall next to him and then threw it away, a frown on his normally placid face. He cleared his throat and then pushed his sleeves up before he opened our glass backdoor and stepped inside. He left the door open and shared a quick glance over his shoulder to me, catching me in the eye. All I did was watch.
Betsy turned away from Clyde and approached me; I stared at her as she stepped through the back doorway and into the yard with me. Her gaze remained on the stars of the night and the cloudy moon. Her voice came out and she whispered to me. She said things that I didn't know how to respond to, that I could only sit and watch and listen.
The darkness dimmed about us and I felt enlightened like my eyes had just been opened to a secret, a secret that I had never thought of but only dreamt.
Suddenly everything had changed.
Betsy smiled at me and clutched me to her bosom before she left. She said something in a low voice to Clyde, so low that to me only her lips moved. Clyde's eyes met her's in response before he tore them away while his cheeks lit up red. He then regarded Kenny who stood in front of him.
I watched as Kenny's cat mouth curled and it moved as he said something to the brunette before him. A frown crossed Clyde's brow and he attempts to say something but the little blonde cuts him off with a swift boot to the balls.
All male faces winced and placed a hand over their own balls.
The scruffy haired blonde looked back over his shoulder at me and smiled. I felt myself smile too. I watched as he elegantly stepped over an all fours watery eyed Clyde and sauntered off upstairs. An expression of satisfaction plastered on his face.
With a laugh I opened the backdoor and glanced at Kyle and Stan who also had smiles on their faces.
I strolled arrogantly over to crumpled Clyde and stared down at him before I leant my head close and said "Good of you to show your face". Legs straightened I stepped over him and wondered up to my room.
Later that evening me and the boys, minus Tweek, went out for some drinks a general feeling free and happiness tied to us. With us dancing like idiots, the usual getting sweaty and ugly ass photos that no matter how 'good looking' you were you just looked cringe worthy.
Our brunette pal was invited but declined sulking, I presumed, in his room. The second I felt bad for him Kenny was there to tell me why I shouldn't to which I stopped, or I more pretended to stop.
Truth be told I thought of him more now than I ever had because these were the things we used to do together, and now I had to do this without him. It didn't feel normal.
A guy I had bumped into during the night had decided to stay and hang around with us, he'd lost his friends and, without tooting my own horn, fancied me quite a bit. I'd allowed him to kiss me and dance with me and I didn't mind it at all. I was allowed to flirt with someone if I wanted too.
Later Clyde had text me saying 'sorry' and that crumbled and ruined everything suddenly I just wanted to be back, to forget everything and just carry on.
When did everything get so complicated?
The group began to hang out a lot more, even Kyle and Stan, Clyde never came though he stayed home and did whatever he did.
I really missed him.
It was nice to spend time with the others, and Tweek had even begun to warm up to me again, which was relieving because Tweek was always a good friend of mine and not having him there had left a gap in the group.
It was half term break, we'd all gone out bowling ate out hung out, watched films, got drunk played games and generally enjoyed each other's company, while Clyde stayed at home, and even if he did decide to come he was quiet and in the background. It was as if me and Clyde had traded bodies and I was him and he was now me.
Today we went for a drive around and came across a beach the six of us separated into mine and Tweek's cars. The wind was bitter and nipped against our faces and hands, but as custom with South Park we all had our winter coats, even Clyde and that ugly red letterman jacket he wore.
Kyle and Stan were up ahead of me the smell of salt roamed up our noses and crisped against our clothes.
Tweek was doing what he usually did and skipped stones into the ocean. He was never any good at it but that didn't stop the amount of glee that flew onto his face every time he threw one.
Kenny dilly-dallied about not really next anyone but not really on his own either. A faint trail of smoke wavered behind him.
Me and Clyde wandered at the back, together but a part.
"Hey" a tap on my shoulder followed the words and I pictured the mouth that had said them. I slowed my steps till I came to a stop.
"Yes?" I looked back over my shoulder at him his round face turned to the sand hands curled in his jacket pockets.
"What's going on with you and the guys?" They were mumbled, his brown eyes cast past me and out towards the sea.
"What do you mean?" I said indignant as if I was being accused of doing something I never did.
"Well you've been hanging out with them a lot lately..." A shoulder shrug graced his words.
"We do live with them Clyde and it is the holidays..." Quirked eyebrow I stared at him in hopes to catch his eye.
"Not usually this much..." He complained.
"Stop mumbling you're not five Clyde" I tell him off, which he pouts at and kicks a stone.
"...You've been spending a lot of time with Kenny..."
"He's like our best friend minus each other; we always spend a lot of time with him." Much to his annoyance I turn in front of him so he can't walk past me.
"But you've been, like, hanging with him more than me" his mouth forms a pout and he looks back down at the ground before he frowns and looks back at me. "You're fucking him aren't you?"
"Woah, what?" My eyebrows raise and I crossed my arms.
"That's what this is, isn't it? He took your virginity and now you're just fucking each other" he gestured toward Kenny further in front of us.
"What are you talking about? Me and Kenny are not fucking, he's straight you know that right?" I try not to get annoyed because even if I was he would be the last person who could be bitchy and defensive about it.
"So what? I say I'm straight but we've done some pretty gay shit together!" His arms gesture wildly which tells me that Clyde is actually pissed off about this.
I laugh "So you do fucking remember that? You're such a prick, how can you lie to my face about this! Do you know how that made me feel!" I slapped a hand to my chest, having made this about me.
"Well I couldn't just say I did, I was with Bebe you know..." He lamely said in his defence.
"Bullshit is that the reason. And no me and Kenny are not fucking all right, not that it would concern you of all people where I put my dick."
"Like shit it wouldn't concern me you are mine!" He pointed and glared at me then right in the eyes daring me to look away in disagreement.
"I'm what?" Surprise shook me and my body filled with adrenaline. My heart felt about to burst out my chest.
"You're not allowed to fuck anyone else that isn't how this works, you only kiss me, not Tweek, not Kenny, just me" with each 'me' he slapped a hand to his chest. His body square and straight, he meant everything he said.
"What? What Clyde! You know I was in a relationship with Tweek right?" Crossed arms I squint my eyes in confusion, where had all this come from? He'd never mentioned feeling like this before, ever.
"Heh, yeah, not anymore though are ya?" His lips turned to a smirk following his whole change in demeanour, suddenly he got real cocky.
"Yeah it was kind of mutual..." Clyde's awkward and negative attitude regarding me and Tweek always made me feel reluctant to talk about it with him around.
"Was it? Or did he just give up?" With a tilt of head Clyde's gleaming eyes gave the impression that he already knew the answer to the question he'd asked.
"No I kind of ended it. I liked someone else so it wasn't fair." I skimmed over the sand not wanting him to catch my eye as he should know who I was indirectly referring too.
"Yeah me, you like me" his hips shifted and he tilted his head and inspected me "And Tweek knew"
"Don't act like it was obvious Clyde because you're a dumbass and didn't even notice and I spent nearly every day with your sorry ass."
"Did he notice? Or did someone tell him..."
"What's that supposed to mean?" I stepped close to Clyde, everything silent but the waves of salted water.
"I told Tweek that you loved me after Token mentioned it to me" he shrugged as if it was no big deal, as if it was nothing, but it was something. Suddenly I felt worse for Tweek, how horrible it must have been to have been told that and no doubt see it so clearly with his own eyes.
"You told Tweek that? Clyde that's cruel!" I pushed his shoulders because I knew Clyde would not have said it in a gentle way either.
"What can I say the thought of you kissing him got to me." His body breathed nonchalance. It angered and confused me.
"You sound like a crazy jealous ex Clyde!" I slapped a hand to my face, why hadn't Tweek said anything?
Clyde shrugs his shoulders "What if I am?"
The wind sounded loud against our ears. Raised eyebrows locked eyes together, navy to chocolate brown. He clasped a hand over his mouth surprise swamped over him. With a step back he went to make a turn, to run from me, but I moved quickly, as if I didn't think and just leapt on impulse. I snatched at his arm and dug my fingers deep into his bicep "Oh no you don't you little bastard!" With a hard yank I pull him back to me, his chest slammed into mine.
"Get off me Craig!" He wriggled his body franticly and I almost let him go.
"You are not walking away this time! You said you're jealous, why is that?" My voice vibrated with rage and my face must have folded in my anger because Clyde looked panicked.
"It meant nothing! It, it just came out okay!" He pulled away from me.
"Like fuck it meant nothing Clyde, you wouldn't have said it otherwise! What did you mean by that?" I kept within body range, I was no way going to let him do a runner.
There was no doubt in my mind that the others had stopped to watch, Clyde could probably see them all staring from over my shoulder.
"Tell me!" I push his shoulders a flash of his mother popped into my mind the words she said to me in the yard, the revelation she gave me.
The revelation that she'd heard my message, that Clyde had heard my message that Clyde was upset that Clyde...
Suddenly I was pushed backwards; I stumbled due to my day dreaming.
"Go on tell him Clyde" sounded Kenny's voice from next to me.
His wide brown eyes looked between us and with an intake of breath his shoulders slumped and he looked defeated. Clenched fists he squinted his eyes and squirmed as if something was itching to burst out of him, and in a ramble, it did
"Alright I like you Craig! I always have. I know I was with Bebe, and I did love Bebe too but, you know when you're out in town and you shop in and out of doors but you never go into one shop, even if it looks the best, but you don't go in because you think that door is closed." He scuffed the sand and continued to talk without looking at me his cheeks a light flush.
I opened my mouth to speak but he cut me off, not even realising that he had.
"But I realised over Christmas that all this time I've loved you and then when Token told me at the barbecue that you loved me too I didn't know what to do. I was scared." He rubbed his arms and peeked a glance at me before facing elsewhere.
"You like me too?" My voice is barely audible
"Yes..." Clyde looked about to cry, naturally.
The second that word left his lips I grabbed his jacket and pulled him to me, pressing my lips against his. His arms clutched against the back of my jumper, he grabbed my hat and threw it off. My mouth curls and our tongues meld against each other, sucking and tugging against each other. I moan in my throat and hear Kenny give a whoop of joy in the background "'Bout fucking time guys"
Kyle and Stan laugh too.
He felt like he belonged there. I never wanted this moment to end. We pulled apart I gazed at Clyde and he didn't seem scared anymore, he seemed relieved.
When things change, they change.
The rest of that blissful clouded afternoon was spent with Clyde's fingertips brushed against mine, that cheery look in his large deer eyes and dimples ever present on his cheeks.
It was nice to smile without my braces digging in too.
My converses stopped outside that all too familiar door way, it was evening and everyone had separated to mellow down.
Clyde's door was open, not pulled to or locked of blocking me, it was open and I could enter whenever I wanted.
"You going to come in or what?" He grinned lopsided and tugged the cuff of my sweatshirt in, pulling me into his cramped room.
Within seconds Clyde wrenched my hoody off and pushed me down onto his bed, with surprise I raised my eyebrows. He then rushed off his jacket and sat down next to me and quickly snatched off my hat once more.
I turned to him "This feels weird right?"
He chuckled in response "Fuck yes, but weird in a 'I can't believe we're doing this kind of way'" he stroked my cheek and smiled.
Quietly I questioned "Is this what being with Bebe felt like?"
"Yeah, but different"
"Did you really love her Clyde?" I stare at his face and watched as he peered down at his hands and observed his fiddling fingers.
"A part of me always will Craig, she was just as much of my childhood as you were"
I nod, not liking, but accepting that answer and before I fully got to reflect Clyde's thick fingers cup my cheeks and turned my face to him, almost instantly my vision goes black and my cheeks tint red.
His lips take shape against mine, moving when I moved. His tongue slipped in to rub against mine, his tongue stud prominent to me; he sucks my tongue and bits my lips tugging them between his teeth.
I tilted my head back and he pulled me close to him, pressed his chest to me and lowered me slowly to his mattress. I moan in my throat and roll my stomach when his hand flittered up my T-shirt, his fingers slid around on my skin.
Soon enough his teeth clamp onto my neck followed by his lips under the crook of my jaw. My skin feels like its burning, I've never felt like this before, this breathless. I moan again and arch my back at his sucking on my neck. I feel Clyde's lips smirk against me his throat croaks and he leaves that spot.
He leant back and glanced over my face and kissed me. He looked as if he was asking me something with his eyes. I blinked at him and he shook his head chuckled and leant up on an elbow above me. His waist pressed to mine and we bite our lips as our erections rubbed.
"Did you fuck Kenny or Tweek?" He half mumbled and turned his gaze toward my chest. I swallowed embarrassed.
"No" a sigh left Clyde's lips at my reply and he rolls his body off and next to me. I lean up on my elbows and looked down at him "What?"
"You're actually still a virgin"
"What's wrong with that?" A frown crawls onto my brow feeling as though I was at fault for not having screwed anyone else.
"It just adds pressure and I dunno, having sex with a dude is different enough, let alone taking your virginity at the same time" he rubs his thick fingered hands over his face.
"Who says I would bottom?" There's a moment of silence before Clyde laughs
"You really think I would? I'm the one who's done all this before so I get to top, and I'm manlier than you" he prods me in the side, my boner still raged uncomfortably in my jeans.
"But I've always been gay. I think I know more about this than you" I say matter of factly, not that I was really bothered about having Clyde above me; it's the way my dreams always worked.
"Oh yeah?" He sat up grinned.
"Yeah" I grin and his mouth attacks me again, except this time his hand races to my crotch and he begins to rub it in his palm almost setting me instantly back on fire.
Biting my lip a whimper escapes my throat.
"Not so cocky now are ya?" Clyde tugged my bottom lip again and began kissing me like I was the last person on earth.
He slid his hands beneath my jeans and boxers and continued to fumble and rub me before finally deciding to unzip my jeans and stroke me properly. His thumb rubbed against the head and makes me squirm and breath heavier.
Clyde's plump kissed lips go to my neck again, which in turn makes me create this embarrassing whine leave my mouth. Not that that mattered though because I couldn't stop moaning, it all felt so good, I felt so hot, so sensitive and this feeling was, Clyde was ...
I groaned shuddered and came, Clyde snickered against me.
Toddling to the toilet in the late hours of night I heard the faint sound of voices and wondered down the stair case to find Kenny lounging on the sofa, the T.V down low and the faint tinge of smoke in the air emanating from him. The sliding back door was open letting in a breeze to wash away the humidity that had randomly come over us, it was warm and cool, relaxing.
"Hey Ken" I plopped down onto our arm chair and muse my hair a little. A glance at the television and I see that he's watching the usual late night cartoon, it's crazy and random and strangely the base of the show was in South Park but man the kids did make me laugh. Today's episode is the one when this kid Craig saves the world from giant guinea pigs.
Kenny doesn't reply back to my 'hey' so I continue and comment about what's happening on screen.
"He has a hat like me, weird right?" I chuckled and turned my eyes on him.
He's still and remained quiet, this causes me to frown because Kenny was rarely ever quiet.
"Dude, what's up?" I questioned.
"Just thinking about Karen" he blinks but doesn't look at me, his eyes sewn to the screen.
"Is everything okay?"
He shrugged "About as good as it can." He paused for a moment. I opened my mouth to retort but he continued to speak "I just wish I could take her out of there you know? Take her away and give her to someone, anyone that could look after her."
I nod and looked down to the floor "It will get better, she'll be okay"
"Did it get better for you? Has it gotten better for you?" He gave me a stern expression which looks strange on his otherwise content face.
"No your dad still beats you doesn't he? Mine don't care either" he chuckled "They care so little that I would sometimes wish that my father beat me, at least then he would acknowledge me in some way"
"... Kenny" I begin but don't know how to follow that. He shakes his blonde head.
"Don't, you don't need to speak."
"You'll find a way Kenny, you always do" we share a small smile
"You should focus on yourself Craig, you're not as secretive as you think."
"Heh, I have been thinking about it lately, you know, since another break is happening soon..."
"Yeah?" He slouched into the couch and suddenly looked a lot happier then when he did moments before.
"Yeah, well, I always wondered how I ended up with such dark hair, considering my parents hair colour"
"It could come from grandparents you know?" Kenny raised his brows and shrugged.
"I guess..." The T.V fuzzed and switched to telemarketing, a clear sign that we should head to bed. And so both slump up we poured ourselves glasses of hot milk, downed them, laughed at our milk moustaches and dragged our sorry asses to bed, except this time I walked a little less and stepped into the bedroom next to mine. I paused and watched his naked muscled back rise and fall, his hair so mussed and fluffy from sleep. With a smile I pulled back the quilt and slipped behind him smelling him from the back of his neck.
"Where did you go?" Half asleep he mumbled and rolled over to face me. He nuzzled my neck and wrapped his thick arms around me. I smiled and sniffed his hair.
When things change, they really change.
Thanks for reading! Don't for reading don't forget to let me know what you think :)