The Teardrop Forest Chapter 13: A midwinter's night dream, a fairy tales fanfic

Chapter 13:

A Midwinter night's dream

Hello, dear reader! I was exploring the attic this morning and look what I found in Cillian's jacket! A sort of diary of one page, interesting (and sweet)! I thought it would interest you too, it's like going in his head (I wish I could do that all the time, he puzzles me sometimes!), but don't tell him or I won't be alive to tell the rest of the story...

I have no one to talk to, so I'm writing this on an ordinay piece of paper, it just needs to be out of my head. Even if it seems pathetic.

I'm afraid I ruined it all. She wasn't supposed to see me doing magic, it was so stupid! I'm so stupid, why didn't wait some time later to do this trick? I'm so stupid! And yes, I used the word "stupid" three times in a row, got a problem with that?

She won't come back now... She's probably freaking out because of me... I swear, when I saw her I was terrified! Humans do not react well to magic when they first see it. Most of them go mad and I was so afraid of her reaction... She was more calm when she left me though. I think she doesn't fully understand what she saw and who I am. I don't even know how I would explain if she asked me how I'm doing magic or what I am.

I wish I could deny who I am, if I could do it, I would. It wouldn't be for her, but obviously for me, let's be honest. Really, I'm sick of being the one that is hidden, the one that has to do the dirty work.

There was a time, not so long ago, I was ready to do all that, just to get attention from my family but it seems I'm bound to be their pawn, forever.

I think I'm torn between doing what they asked and finally getting what I always dreamed of, a place in my world, and doing what i feel is right and save her.

If she was to discover who I truly am and why I'm here, she would hate me till the day I die. Gosh, She would never want to see me again and that would be terrible... I couldn't bear not to see her, talk to her, hear her laugh...

Why must her eyes shine like that when she smiles? Why does she seems so different from me, so out of my reach? Why can't I bear to see her tears?

Wow, I hope nobody is ever reading that, I really sound pathetic! Maybe that would be good for Eden to freak out and never come again, that way I wouldn't be so weak! They always said I was too weak...

And obviously, I'm not signing this, you never know who might stumble on it!

Our footsteps were resonating in the deserted hallway. I walked faster and faster because I knew he was trying to talk to me and as much as I wanted to hear his deepest apologies, I wanted him to realize what he did wasn't right.

"Eden!" Faster, walk faster. Don't. Stop.

"Eden!" he repeated ceasing my arm and forcing me to face him. I didn't struggle, I was tired of fighting, but I still refused to look at him in the eyes.

He gently touched my chin and held my head up.

"I truly am sorry and I don't ask you to forgive me because I hurt your feelings and I wouldn't dare to ask you to let me get away with that. I just want you to know that I regret what I did but I was forced to do it."

I dared to look in his eyes and was captivated for some time by all the intensy lying in them and I could almost read the truth in them.

"You were forced to do that? Everybody has a choice, Zéphyr. The truth is that you let your cousin influence you and you thought popularity was tempting. Didn't you?" I said.

It seems he had caught his breath for a second, he still was looking in my eyes and I could tell he knew the answer but was interiorly debating what to tell me.

He furrowed his brows for a second and looked away from me: "Yes, in a way".

He took one last look at me before leaving me alone in the dark high school hallway and I sighed as I saw the tall silhouette disappear in a corner.

I briskly opened my eyes as I heard my alarm filling my room with rythmed music. I groaned put my pillow on my ears; that was exactly one second before my phone alarm began to vibrate in a very irritating manner. I know me too well, it was quite obvious I wasn't going to get up at the first alarm signal. Frustrated by having slept such little amount of time, I began to prepare for the day.

Later in the day...

Katie and I walked in the hallway, earphones plugged in our ears, singing happilly(and crazily) to our favourite song, as we headed to our classes.

After we finished our little show, I gave her back the earphone, still laughing at how stupid and weird we might appear. It is quite delicious you know, having someone with whom you could just chill and be silly.

"See ya later!" she said as she walked away. I answered her and smiled to myself.

I walked in the empty Drama class, put my bag on a chair and began pulling a big table against the wall, as we did every Thursdays to have more space in the room.

Students began to enter the room as well as the teacher and everyone sat to listen to the funny and grinning Mister Perfam.

"Hello guys!" said the young, dashing teacher, "I have good news! The school finally decided to accept my brilliant idea to organize a little show in March to raise funds for the journey I want to do with you. You remember, the italian school is doing some exchange of students, so we get to do our show, to go visit Italy and make some friends there! Isn't this awesome?" Everyone laughed and cheered in the classroom, I am still amazed at how he managed to convince the head teacher of our small town high school.

A girl asked what play we would present and Mr Perfam happilly announced it would be... drumrolls... Romeo&Juliet!

Oh great! What is it with the teachers, our French teacher made us study love stories and now him too? I really liked him, but I wasn't sure it was a great idea. I remember that all the boys moaned also when they heard the news.

Our Drama teacher was about to argue that it wasn't so bad but was interrupted by the door opening.

"Oh, do come in, I forgot about you! Please come in, don't be shy. Guys, there's a new member added to our group, some of you might already know him." Mr Perfam said.

And then, he entered and I had to resist the urge to widen my eyes. Standing next to the teacher was Zéphyr who, by the look on his face, was clearly beginning to regret coming there.

"This is Zéphyr. He's French, and has attended drama classes since he was 7 and also has already acted in Romeo & Juliet! I count on you guys to make him feel comfortable."

Zéphyr nervously walked towards a chair trying not to give me a glance as he passed by me.

I was obviously angry at him because I concluded he was there for me and he would certainly want to talk to me and I didn't want to... And also, I didn't want to act with him.

"So, I already decided who would play Juliet since the girls were really good this year and it was a hard choice but I observed each of you the passed weeks, and I decided..." our beloved teacher loved suspense, and even I was excited to know who would it be (wishing it was not me).

"... that it will be Eden! Congratulations, you were one of the first to be really implicated in this class and this year particularly you made efforts to put more emotions in your characters." he he announced cheerfully as he held out a copy of the play to me with both hands, as if it was a rare and valuable object. I took the book and thanked him.

He turned around and continued his speech: "As for the boys, you have a hard time letting out your emotions", he explained making wide gestures," so I decided to give you one more week, where you'll read, study this and play Romeo as if your life depended on it. We'll have practice on the Thursdays but also on the Wednesdays, and each boy will act a Romeo scene. And, girls, you work on your characters and help the boys with theirs for now."

He seemed to think for a moment who he would choose to begin practising a scene and I observed him, while praying it wouldn't be our brand new actor. It seemed he quickly found out who who set a good example for the boys and pointed out me and guess who? No other than Mr Stabbing-in-the-back, aka Zéphyr! I should have known wishes didn't come true...

My former friend got up and walked slowly while looking at me intensely, watching out for any emotions that could appear on my face. I tried not to seem too cold, because of the others, but also not too warm, because of him.

I was struggling to find motivation to concentrate as we were about to begin acting but didn't manage to do so. I suddenly said I wasn't feeling well and rushed out of the classroom to find myself in the hallway. As I walked with a determined pace, I vaguely heard Zéphyr tell to the teacher it was safer if he went to see if I was okay.

It was then his turn to hurry in the hallway to catch up with me but he obviously wasn't aware of my stubbornness. I quickened my pace as I heard him call my name and I tried to push away that odd feeling which was growing in me.

Something really didn't seem right... I couldn't put my finger on it...

"Eden!" Faster, walk faster. Don't. Stop.

"Eden!" he repeated ceasing my arm and forcing me to face him. I didn't struggle, I was tired of fighting, but I still refused to look at him in the eyes.

He gently touched my chin and held my head up.

I shivered at the strange feeling of Déjà vu as I heard the whispered words pronounced by him, which were exactly the same that the ones in my dream the night before.

I eventually dared to look in his eyes and was captivated once again by all the intensity lying in them and could feel the truth of his words lying in them. I decided to answer the same thing I did in my dream, as if I was acting the play my imagination had created.

"You were forced to do that? Everybody has a choice! I think that, in reality, you let your cousin influence you and you thought popularity was tempting. Didn't you?" I said.

Like in my dream, he had caught his breath for a second, he still was looking in my eyes and for a second, I saw something flicker in his eyes, something that wasn't in my dream. It only lasted a second though, and I could see he was interiorly debating what to tell me.

He furrowed his brows for a second and looked away from me: "I just want to be loved." I was taken aback by his answer, I wasn't really expecting that.

"Don't confuse mistake that for a mere pursuit of popularity, Eden. You can't understand why I did that, and anyway, I can't tell you. All I can say is that it's beyond high school drama and popularity. I think you know me enough to tell that I am not this kind of boy." he paused for a moment to glance at me. "I've changed my mind, and losing your friendship made me realize how valuable it was. I think you don't know what you have until it's gone, and that really sad. So, yes, I apologized, and I said I want to be friends again but I guess this is too late."

Now, it was all up to me and I had no idea what to think. He seemed truly sincere, but he had hurt my pride and for a girl that didn't want to let anyone in, it was quite a blow. I didn't want to pass for the dumb girl that let people tread on her.

He sighed at my silence and took one last look at me before leaving me alone in the dark high school hallway.

I sighed as I saw the tall silhouette disappear in a corner and stood there for some time, unable to distinguish if this was reality or just my imagination.

A/N: Hello! I'm so sorry (once again) for not updating in a while! I drowned under the homework and I didn't what to write for this story... I value each of my reviews and I thank AriaRose7 and KG for being so loyal and motivating! If you have any ideas or speculations about the story, I'd be glad to hear them because I lack of inspiration right now.