Chapter 13

He was heavy on top of her, holding her face in his hands, making her feel as if she was the most important person in the world. He kissed the corner of her eyes, her brow, the corner of her lips, her chin…to the spot Jeff had left. She couldn't help but feel dirty for this. She was going to die anyway, so why should it matter? Her hands traced the muscles on his chest, running through the little hair he had. His eyes were staring down at her, Johanna's wet hair stained his pillows. And he didn't care. His hands were working magic against her sore muscles, rubbing her stomach, the flab of fat and skin her legs, to her thighs. She let out a soft moan, her body as reacting as if Jeff was touching her. He was easing his way into breaking her, and she didn't mind. When she opened her eyes again, his lips were mashing against hers. Hands running up, to capture her hands. They interlocked fingers.

"I've been wanting to do this, for such a long time…" He whispered against her lips. She was naked underneath him, and he naked on top of her.

What am I doing? She thought, Jeff didn't even enter her mind. She only thought was this man on top of her, this man she had known for years. Giving her attention, and making her feel safe, comfortable. More importantly, beautiful.

Tightening her grip on his hands, she kissed Jose again. Deeper, more passionate, he was heavy, bulky on top of her…he was muscular, and it fit well with her body. She lifted her head up, and moaned softly in his ear, she looked to the dresser, covered in candles, flickering, leaving the room in a soft glow. Feeling her body turn red, and flush. Jose groaned back, he was aching in anticipation. He waited for this moment for seven years, now it was his turn. He didn't think she was dirty, he didn't think she was a whore, he just thought, she was in danger, and did what she had too to live. Jose, let go of her hands, running them down her ribcage. She was thick girl, with a beautiful heart, and a broken soul. He refused to let that monster mend her together. He was her hero, he was her best friend and have been since they were children.

Her hands, touched his chest, and he spread her legs. He leaned forward, he wanted to take his time with her. He wanted to show her true passion, and real love. He leaned forward placing his forehead against hers. He was slow, and it made her insides burn. Tilting her head back, she moaned in absolute pleasure. Her heart skipped, her face turned in complete ecstasy. Jose, smiled, he kept pushing. He never gloated about his size, and he never wanted too. It was something he kept to himself, and surprised whatever girlfriend he had at the moment.

Johanna's eyes were closed, she was biting her bottom lip, and the candle light flickered across her body. Causing her to have an ethereal glow. She was beautiful, and it made him want her more. She wrapped her legs around his waist, and he lifted her up, holding her in his arms. Her own arms wrapped around his neck. He pushed his forehead against hers again, kissing her deeper, he wanted her to know, he was there. Her hands roamed down over his biceps, her breathing labored. Johanna's hard nipples pressed against his chest, making him want to go harder, he kept the same pace, wanting the build up to be the best. Johanna's nails dug into his shoulders, he kissed down to her neck. His thrusts, were making her want to scream in pleasure. Sweat glistened her body, his heavy muscular one kept her protected and shielded. A soft breeze passed through an open window, causing goosebumps to rise against her skin.

"Johanna…" He groaned out, burying his face against the nape of her neck. She held onto him tighter, her eyes rimmed with tears. The orgasm was peaking, her cries started out low, now rising.

"Jose…" She whimpered, he didn't want her to let go, he himself didn't want to let go. He didn't. He kept pushing, harder, laying down on her back, his hands captured her hips, and he dived down deep inside her. Her hands stayed at his biceps, leaving deep scratch marks against his skin, his bangs were sweat drenched, plastered against his forehead. Crying out, she tightened around him like a vise. She started to breathe hard. He was there with her, hitting his own peak.

Coming down, from the high he laid on top of her for a moment. Softly pushing the hair from her face, he looked over her face, as he smiled. Chuckling lightly. She watched him carefully, she actually had a beautiful smile, an honest smile. Her eyes, glistened he leaned down kissing her nose softly. She started to giggle, beautiful tears slipped down her cheeks. He climbed off her, only to pull her close to his body, and wrapped his arms around her tightly. He was going to shelter her from everything.

"Jose…" She whispered. He looked down at her, running his finger over her cheek.

"What is it Johanna?" He replied. He smiled, and she couldn't help but smile back, even with braces, he was possibly the cutest man she had ever met. Her hand ran down his arm, feeling the strength in his muscles. He was an outstanding person, with a beautiful heart. He had never wanted anything but to help her. He had never wanted harm to come to her, he just…wanted to protect her. And she was so blind, and didn't see this.

"You said you're going to do research on this guy?" She asked.

She looked up, his jaw was perfectly chiseled, hazel eyes, thin lips, and thick eye brows. That didn't deter from his face, or caused him to look ugly. He looked more like a bad cop, till he started to talk. He wasn't tan like Tony, nor as handsome. However, Johanna, didn't really care at this point. Jose had given her something to actually think about. Within his kisses, his touch, he actually cared. Then there was Jeff, broken mentally, with nothing to live for. Nothing to work for. Just kill. Kill. Kill. Is that really what she wanted in her life? But the thrill, of being with a serial killer…that's another thing she had to think about. What if he had turned around and slit her throat? What then? At least with Jose she wouldn't have that problem. Johanna, felt so confused. She was broken from her thoughts, when he whispered.

"I plan on it yeah." He smiled, kissing her forehead.

"Don't you worry about it, I'll get everything I can on this guy." He sat up, leaning on his elbow as he watched her.

"Are you going to stay with him?" He asked, rubbing her arm gently. Johanna, didn't realize…Jose knew she was with him. Johanna started to sit up, and she felt her eyes brim with tears again.

"I'm starting to feel like a crybaby, thanks to all the crying I've been doing." She laughed, covering her face. Jose shook his head, as he sat up with her.

"You're cracked Johanna, not broken. Cracked, can be fixed. Broken can't." He placed his hands on her shoulders.

"I promise Johanna, you're cracked, not broken. I will help fix you. No matter what I have to do." His eyes twinkled as he smiled. She couldn't help but smile back. Even with the tears slipping down her cheeks.

"I just feel like-"

"Like what we did was wrong?" He rose a brow, and she went quiet. He sighed.

"Jo, we've known each other since grade school. I know you have a thing for that serial killer. I can't tell you how to run your life. But do you want to constantly run away from the law? From me?" He was touching her face now, staring into her eyes.

"I don't want to watch you leave again…I just can't. It tore me up once already." Scooting closer, she looked at him, already seeing the pain etched in his face. She didn't want to walk away from him now. She just didn't.

"I'm nothing without you." He tried again, Johanna's words were stuck in her throat. She couldn't tell him no, and she couldn't tell him yes. Deep in those hazel eyes, she was stuck. Stuck were she was. She was falling in love, not just with Jeff…but with Jose as well. She felt dirtier then she had ever felt before. Slapping herself mentally, she sighed, laying back on the bed. Jose, leaned forward and kissed her softly.

"I promise I'll protect you with my life." He got off the bed, and she watched with amazement at his wonderful sculpted body. He had fair skin, comparatively to Jeff's. Sighing, she laid sideways on the bed, her head hanging off the side. Hair falling forward, touching the floor.

Joanna, what am I going to do? She asked, staring at the carpet. And still she had received no answer. Something she had become accustomed too. Moaning she closed her eyes, wanting, and praying just a single word from her twin. Something to guide her through this mess. Being in love with two guys? Isn't that a little farfetched. One a serial killer the other a homicide detective? Johanna, looked up, and watched him turn on the bathroom light. She felt a soft ache, wanting to be near him. She still had the ache of missing Jeff.

What's wrong with me? Am I a whore? She asked.

No, it could be stock home syndrome for Jeff. I didn't even think about that. Still…it wasn't fair. How did she get stuck in this mess? A handsome homicide detective, just made amazing love to her, and yet, she still missed Jeff the infamous serial killer. What else could go wrong? Being stuck in this damn situation has made her a pussy. A cry baby…and a weakling. Johanna, rolled over, laying on her back, she stared at the ceiling, the candle light danced, and bounced off the soft beige of the room. Johanna, watched the master bathroom light turn on, the shower starting up. She sighed, feeling an increase of loneliness creeping up. Crawling out of the bed, silently climbing into the shower after Jose. The water was hot, almost scalding her skin, Jose turned around, and grunted when Johanna wrapped her arms around his waist, head against his chest. She could hear his heart stutter, this was normal. Loving Jeff, wasn't. Loving Jose was.

When his arms, wrapped around her, Johanna felt the tightness in her throat. The burning sensation behind her eyes. Her heart started to heave, as her chest became tight. A sob was stuck in her throat.

"I miss her…" It was soft, and Jose winced at the sadness that laced her voice. He knew who she was talking about, Johanna, didn't have a proper way to mourn. She just moved from one state to another. She didn't have a chance to go through the stages of grief. He held her, he didn't want to do anything else, just hold her.

"I'm hated because all I did was hide…I didn't do anything." Johanna cried.

His hand softly rubbed her back, he learned taking psychology it was best to let the griever speak, and let it out.

"I don't want to think it was Jeff. I don't want it to be Jeff who killed my family." She looked at Jose. Her eyes were swollen from the constant crying. Jose, held her to his chest, softly rocking her.

"I'm here, let it out…" He whispered, laying his cheek on top of her head.

It was the most human, she had felt in a long time.

…

Jeff kept pacing, back and forth. She wasn't back at her apartment, she wasn't her work. He couldn't fathom where she was. He was starting to get worried, tossing his knife in the air. Where could she be? He thought about Tony, the cop that had kissed her about two weeks ago, but that couldn't be right. He was there when he degraded Johanna, perhaps Jose? The other cop? Gritting his teeth, he stared at the dinner he made. Albite sloppy, but he did his best. Not really knowing how to cook, he did his best to make hot dogs and macaroni and cheese. Huffing he flopped down on the sofa. He missed her damn it. Too much to deny that he loved her. He hasn't felt a single drip of sanity since he killed his parents. But now, this girl brought too much sanity to him. He tried thinking about slitting her throat just to end it all. But it makes him want to end up sobbing. He didn't want to die. He didn't want her to leave. He stood, staring at the food he made. He was going on a whim, to check out Jose's house. He prayed, that she wouldn't be there. If she was, she wouldn't stop him this time, he will kill him.