Chapter 12

Padmé rolled over in her bed, pulling the blankets closer to her. The small room was completely dark. Over the past few days her mind kept going over and over the events of the destruction of the Death Star. Her thoughts always narrowed down to one thing: Luke being chased and shot at by Darth Vader. There was no official word on whether or not Vader had survived. The last anyone saw of his fighter, it was spinning out of control away from the battle station before it exploded.

Part of her desperately wished Darth Vader was gone. Vanished into the darkness and depths of space, yet the other part of her knew. Darth Vader wasn't gone. Once he recovered, he would be back to hunt down the Rebel pilot who had escaped him and destroyed the Death Star.

Her mind came back to Obi-Wan Kenobi and their final conversation. "You knew," Padmé whispered to herself in the dark room. "When we were on the Death Star. You knew Ana- Darth Vader was there. When you said goodbye, you knew it was the last time."

Princess Winter had been right when she said Obi-Wan had been a sacrifice, a diversion, so they could make it off the Death Star. He allowed himself to be taken down by Darth Vader so Padmé and the twins could escape. And now . . . and now it felt like Luke was squandering Obi-Wan's sacrifice. Padmé's sacrifice. Everything that she had thrown away for the sake of her children. Her career, her family, and even parts of her identity.

It all had been thrown away in Luke's fatal shot into the Death Star. It was now only a matter of time before Darth Vader put the pieces together and discovered the truth. There would be no place in the galaxy safe for Luke. No place safe for Leia or herself.

Padmé heard the door of the bunk slide open. Footsteps entered and the door shut. The light was turned on in the room. She didn't want Leia there. Or Luke. Or anyone. She wanted to be alone. She didn't want to deal with anything. When she did get up, everything felt like a chore. The food was all tasteless. She was tired after doing simple things like showering. She couldn't focus on any conversations. She felt heavy, her mind fuzzy, and constantly tired. The moment she was out of bed, she wanted to be back in it.

"Mom?" It was Luke. "I know you're awake. I brought you some food." Luke sighed in frustration. It only made Padmé feel worse. She heard Luke moving around and the sound of Luke placing the food container on the table. "Mom . . . Mom I need to talk to you." His voice was stern.

With a bit of rectulance, Padmé sat up. She casted the blankets aside, allowing her legs to drape off the side of the bunk. Her hair was loose and tangled. She looked over at her son. Both twins had quickly stopped wearing their Tatooine farm clothes after the battle. Luke now wore a black v-neck shirt with a yellow-tan jacket. He wore tall black boots over brown pants. His black utility belt carried the lightsaber.

"Mom," Luke said after taking a deep breath. "I'm going to officially join the Alliance." Padmé glanced down at her lap. Silence stretched between the two. "M-mom?" Luke asked hesitantly.

Padmé looked up at her son. It took her a minute before she could finally form the words. Her tongue felt heavy. "How?" she said softly. Luke looked a bit confused by this. Padmé continued, "How could you do this Luke? Blend in. Don't attract attention. Stay hidden. How can we stay safe now? How can you?"

"Mom . . ." Luke shifted awkwarded casting his gaze to the side. "I've thought about it. I think this is the best thing I can do. They need help."

Padmé stood up and grabbed Luke's jacket. "I need you, Luke," she pleaded. "I need you to be safe."

"What do you want me to do mom? Hide in here with you?" Luke asked. "I'm more help out there then in here."

"You may be more help to the Alliance, but are you helping yourself?" Padmé asked. "Don't you see what danger you've put yourself in to? You've already faced him once! You only survived because of Captain Solo. Don't think that Darth Vader wouldn't have shot you down. Don't think he'll hesitate if he gets a second shot!"

"What else did you want me to do mom?" Luke said, anger creeping into his voice. "Not take the shot? The Death Star was already in position. It had Yavin in its sight. It was mere minutes of blowing up the moon along with you and Leia!"

"You didn't have to go out there at all!" Padmé shouted.

"Then we all could have blown up together," Luke said a bit darkly. Padmé took a quick step back, letting go of her son's jacket. "Mom . . . mom I didn't mean . . ." he stumbled. The two looked at each other. Brown eyes meeting blue. Silence stretched between them. Both tense, neither looking away.

"You think I don't know that?" Padmé said finally finding the courage to speak out. "You think I haven't gone over it a million times in my head? You think I haven't thought of every scenario possible? I . . . I . . . I was also so scared that I was going to lose you. Lose you to him. I was living a nightmare, Luke. I can't have you go out there again."

Luke stepped up to his mother, once again closing the space between mother and son. He placed a hand on her upper arm. "Mom," he said softly. "It's going to be alright."

Padmé softly shook her head. "No, it won't," she said. The worry and sadness easily came out in her words. "It won't be all right. Not from Vader. I know him, Luke. I knew him as Anakin. I know him as Darth Vader. I have painstakingly followed his career for nineteen years. He won't let this go. He'll take this personally. Against you. It's only a matter of time before Vader learns of your name. Your sister's name. Learns about all of us."

Padmé once again looked down at the floor. She clenched her hands together.

"Maybe he won't find out," Luke offered. Padmé looked at her son. She was painfully aware of how much he looked like his father with those blue eyes. "Find out about you or Leia, I mean. I don't think there is anything I can do to prevent Darth Vader from finding out the identity of the Rebel who shot down the Death Star. But when I registered with the Alliance, I signed up as Luke Skywalker."

"Luke!" Padmé groaned. "Oh why would you do that?"

"Because there is no Luke Skywalker," Luke explained. A sad smile crossed his lips. "There are no records of a Luke Skywalker. No records of his sister or mother. When the Empire digs into my past, they won't find anything."

Padmé wanted to tell her son how naive he was. As if Imperial Intelligence would be fine with just digging through Tatooine's official records. Padmé had no doubt the Imperials would interrogate whoever they could get their hands on to get the information they wanted. Luke had only made it easier for his true identity to be discovered by using the last name Skywalker. The name Lars wasn't that remarkable, but Skywalker was. The moment Vader heard it, he would double or triple his efforts to bring down Luke.

"I'm so sorry I failed you, Luke," Padmé said softly. "I should haven't left you in the hangar. I should have stopped you from going out. I tried so hard for nineteen years to keep you and your sister safe. To stay hidden. Now you're not."

Padmé started to cry, and Luke could only embrace his mother. They stayed like that for a long while, before Luke finally pulled away and looked down at his mother. Her face was red and stained with tears.

"I'm sorry, Mom," Luke said. "But I can't change the past. The best thing I can do for you and Leia is to help the Alliance bring down the Empire. Then we won't have to live in fear anymore."

Padmé clenched her teeth at those words. She found she had accidentally bit the inside of her cheek. She could taste the blood in her mouth. Luke's words echoed what Mon Mothma had told Padmé during their meeting before the battle. Padmé wondered if Mothma had said those words to Luke to get him to join the Alliance. Of course the Alliance would be eager to recruit Luke. He was their golden poster boy hero.

As if sensing her thoughts, Luke said, "I joined the Alliance of my own free will. This is what I want."

"Then you've decided," Padmé said. "Will you kill him?" Padmé straightened up, head held high and looked straight at Luke. "Will you kill Darth Vader? Will you kill your father?"

Luke didn't back down. He held his mother's gaze. It was clear to Padmé he already gone through this question himself. He was prepared for it.

"Yes," Luke said without hesitation. "I have to end this."