"Where there is perhaps a province in which the photograph can tell us nothing more than what we see with our own eyes, there is another in which it proves to us how little our eyes permit us to see." ~Dorothea Lange

Chapter 13

After Bella assured Edward that she'd had her cycle the previous week and, therefore, it was impossible for her to be pregnant, the new dove birds retreated back to Bella's bed. They spent the rest of the evening, and much of the next morning, recreating their special moment.

O_o

Bella lay awake in the early morning hours savoring the sudden turn her life had taken, thinking of the fact that she had a boyfriend; a full-fledged, living, breathing human man who returned her adulation. However, she hated the term boyfriend. It sounded so callow and fatuous, so she'd taken to acquainting herself with the spanish word for boyfriend instead: Novio. While it was in fact saying the same thing- just in a different language, it sounded more sophisticated and cultivated. As the term rolled around in her head, she settled upon introducing it to Edward later during breakfast…that is, if they made it to breakfast…

"I love that we can be like this with each other," Bella said to Edward a few hours later as they lay together like a hotdog wrapped in its bun, kept warm with ketchup, mustard and relish.

Edward had noted that he cherished their time together as well, for he also realized he wouldn't see Bella again for several days. He detested the lingering absence and told Bella so. She had parent-teacher conferences several evenings the following week, and wouldn't be available for a rendezvous with her new Novio.

"I will miss you this week, my little dove," Edward said lovingly, rubbing his nose against Bella's. He'd always thought Eskimo kisses were libidinous, and couldn't believe he'd finally apprehended a woman with which to share them.

The pair finally parted company after a lengthy goodbye where, "No, you go first," and, "No, you leave first," were uttered several times. Finally, Lori, Bella's peevish neighbor inserted herself into the conversation by stepping into the hallway and demanding the two part ways before she got the fire hose and turned it on them.

With one last kiss, Edward and Bella finally parted ways, both lamenting their impending separation.

O_o

As Bella sat eating her banana at lunch the following Monday, she couldn't help but think of Edward, and the intimate moments they'd shared over the weekend. As she took a petite bite off the tip of the yellow fruit, Miss Tammy's advice flashed unbidden through her mind.

"...to achieve the most powerful orgasm, it is preferable to begin your encounter with teasing. You can start by kissing and licking the-"But Bella was unable to finish reminiscing as her thoughts were cut short.

"Hey, Girlie," the familiar, yet annoying voice rang out as she felt a hand clamp down on her shoulder.

"Whah..." Bella couldn't form a complete or coherent word as she stared up like a cow caught in headlights. She didn't want to believe who was standing in front of her-in the teacher's lounge-in her place of employment on her lunch break.

"Ph...Phil..." she stuttered. "Why are you here?"

"I'm filling in for coach Semus," Phil responded with a wide smile. Bella was confused momentarily, but soon remembered that the PE teacher had fallen backward onto a hard, orange plastic traffic cone. It had occurred during his last class of the day Friday, thus receiving a rather incommodious injury.

"Youare filling in for Poly?" Bella responded with trepidation. Considering the nature of the injury Poly Semus had received, it would be a couple weeks before walking would be in the realm of possibilities for the trauma-laden PE teacher.

As she stared up at the human form in front of her (and she meant human in loose terms), Bella couldn't believe her luck, or lack thereof. Not only had Phil made the moves on her, but now she was going to have to see his smug hippopotamus face every day while Poly recuperated! As Bella closed her eyes and took a deep breath, she did something she'd never done before. She mentally looked to the heavens, and gave God the finger.

"But…how?" she stumbled.

"Poly is an old friend of mine," Phil said in a suggestive tone and a wink. "I work as a substitute for the district. I typically only take jobs at the high school; more divorced gals over there, you know. And the kids can do stuff for themselves, no class trips to the bathroom or whatever. But when Poly called me up and told me about the job here, with you-well, I couldn't say no, now could I?"

Bella was left speechless. He could have most certainly said no. Phil had done this on purpose! Suddenly, a news clip from several years previous played in Bella's head. She pictured a young Nancy Kerrigan, sitting on the floor wailing, "Why…why me…?"

Bella wondered the exact same thing.

As the lunch bell sounded, she made her escape away from Phil and back to the lunchroom to collect her charges. She hastened the children into a line and proceeded back to her room, where she was about to begin a science lesson about the birds and the bees, literally.

As the children cut out pictures of roses, sparrows and bumblebees, the class discussed the basic process of fertilization and how pollination occurred.

Ever the astute young man, Eric posed the first question. "Miss Swan? But how does the flower get pregnant?"

Bella was dumbfounded at first as there hadn't been any mention of the word "pregnant." She thought for a moment, trying to find a simple explanation that would both placate and answer the complicated question.

"Well," Bella began, then picked up the flower and tacked it to the board, proceeding to illustrate the rudimentary elements of pollination with construction paper models and hand motions.

"But what if the flower doesn't want to be pregnant Miss Bella?" Eric continued in earnest, "My mom said it was all my dad's fault that she was pregnant again because he was too stupid to wear a raincoat. Will my raincoat keep me from getting pregnant, Miss Swan?" Bella groaned internally, but forged on. It was a teachable moment, and Miss Swan never wasted an occasion such as this.

Thirty minutes later, as the children lined up for recess, Bella brushed the hair out of her eyes and plopped in her chair unceremoniously. She was exhausted! Who knew that pollination would be so confusing to explain to a room full of six year-olds? The impromptu lesson had done one thing, however. It reminded Bella that she needed to make an appointment with her lady doctor for an exam and general work-up. With as much sex as she and Edward had been having, she knew it was only responsible to have a full panel of STD test and to get on some form of birth control. It would certainly make things easier for their spontaneous love sessions.

As Bella spoke with the receptionist at Dr. Gupta's office, she was surprised to learn that the nurse practitioner just had a cancellation and could fit her in that very afternoon. Perhaps something was going to go right in Bella's day after all.

O_o

Edward sat at his laptop, gleefully clicking away on link after link. He'd stumbled onto a few different websites of educational value when he googled the term, "sex help." The first site was for sex addiction, and while Edward felt he wasn't there quite yet, he could understand how it could be quite addictive. The second link was sex education for teens. While his knowledge on the subject seemed rather basic, he didn't want to patronize a site that was fundamental in its explanation of the human body. As Edward continued to scroll through the list, noting a video for a woman having trouble with anal intercourse, he realized that perhaps, "sex help" wasn't the most appropriate term for his search. Instead he typed in, "sex tips," and was rewarded with a more helpful host of choices. He finally decided on a site, Sexinfo101, to begin his edification.

At first glance, he was simply amazed at the supply and variety of information gathered in one place. He could learn about different sex toys, video production, even erotic books and audio that was available for purchase; all located on one convenient website! Edward continued to scroll down the page, his eyes widening in amazement as topic after topic appeared. Then, he came to the mother of all topics: Sex positions.

His fingers lingered over the mouse pad before he finally clicked on a picture of an undressed man and woman on a couch. But Edward wasn't prepared for what appeared on the screen next.

"Holy geezuz," he uttered as the picture began its three dimensional animated model. "You can see…" Edward paused and looked around his living room to see if anyone was looking. Logically, he knew he was alone in his own home, but that didn't ease the anxiety he felt at looking at such graphic depictions.

Edward checked to make sure that Henri and Dorothea's delicate eyes weren't spying the lascivious contents of the computer screen. Then, Edward clicked the next picture entitled, "Acrobat." As he watched the screen in front of him, he squinted and leaned forward, trying to take in as much detail as possible.

"She sure is flexible," Edward muttered to himself.

Never the less, he took note of the rhythm and movement of the anime couple before him. After watching that particular animation for several moments, he clicked back and began exploring other video depictions. He noted that there was an entire section dedicated to oral gratification, and Edward was determined to explore those positions in as much detail as all the others. Pleasing his dove was his utmost concern, and he intended to please her as often as she would allow!

After perusing for a few moments, Edward came across one position that stopped him dead in his tracks. "Holy bassanova!" he exclaimed. He used the zoom feature on his computer and enlarged the model until it filled the screen.

On display before him was a man positioned at the side of the bed, his feet placed on the floor. "The Mastery- Suspended, huh?" Edward blushed as he thought of doing such a thing with his delicate dove. His thoughts were instantly pornographic, but he wasn't sure if that was indeed something Bella would be interested in. She'd seemed somewhat adventurous the past weekend when he'd mentioned wanting to try different positions, so her acceptance of such a task would seem likely. But Edward wanted to be careful not to push too far, too fast. They would stick with missionary as long as Bella needed.

After taking several deep breaths and once again checking his surroundings for invisible voyeurs, Edward typed in a new search. While the Sex101 had been extremely helpful, he was ready for something a bit more…realistic.

"Here goes nothing," he said to himself while hitting the enter key on the keyboard.

"Oh!" Edward choked out as his search results filled the screen: 214,000,000 results? For porn? He was having a hard time- pun intended- processing the sheer number of results. Where was one to even start? No wonder the degradation of America was occurring at such a rapid pace, while its gross domestic production was declining. Everyone was watching porn instead of working, it seemed.

Results like youporn, pornhubandbookshelfporn were returned results. Edward sat back in his chair and took a deep breath. He wasn't even sure where to start. He resituated himself in the chair, getting comfortable. He was going to be there for a while if he had 214 million results to wander through.

Edward clicked on the first link, steadying himself for his new life as a sexual deviant. After a bit of inspection, he came across a category for vintage videos. Mumbling to himself that, "They don't make 'em like they used to…" Edward clicked and settled in for the evening.

o_O

Bella's doctor's appointment had gone as expected. She came- no pun intended- she saw, she conquered…the stirrups and the scoot down, that is. She left the office with a smile and a note from the nurse that they would call if there was a problem with any of her labs. In this case, no news was good news.

The remaining evenings that week were dedicated to meetings with parents and discovering that her problem students often seemed to have problem parents. The school week couldn't come to an end soon enough, as Friday would be the first opportunity Bella would have to see Edward. They'd had brief phone conversations and a few racy texting sessions, but the pair remained sight unseen til Friday afternoon.

In light of the fact that Bella had a half day from school, Edward took a half day of vacation as well. If their plans held true, they would spend it reconnecting.

Bella took one last look around her apartment before responding to the knock at her door. Candles lit: check; Sparkling cider: check; naughty lingerie: CHECK!

Not wanting to open the door to a stranger while she was dressed in her finest unmentionables, Bella checked the peep hole; the unmistakable mop of hair waiting on the other side. Eager to reunite with her lover and reconnect, Bella flung the door open.

Edward immediately pounced, unable to wait another moment to hold his dove in his arms. He snuggled close, running his nose and mouth along Bella's jaw and neck. Bella attempted to stifle her giggle, but it was proven unsuccessful. Edward pulled away, a confused grin on his face.

"Edward! It tickles," Bella said motioning toward his lips.

Edward ran his thumb and index finger across his new facial accessory. "You like?" he asked in earnest.

"Uh…" was all Bella was able to respond. Edward grimaced, unsure of whether Bella was a fan of his mustache.

"Well, I saw a few films last weekend and a young actor named Billie Burka wore a mustache. I thought it was quite fetching," he responded in defense of hairy upper lip.

"Edward, what kind of films were you watching? The mustache hasn't been popular since the 70's!"

Suddenly, Edward felt a bit sheepish. He recalled that he'd been watching the vintage films on Youporn. Many of them had been from the 70's and 80's, characterized by the copious amounts of hair…everywhere… on the actors. Edward sighed, marking another invisible "x" in the "blunder" column, but was determined not to let a little mishap with his 'stache

cloud the impending weekend. A razor and a few minutes would take care of said problem; still Edward was reconciled to trying at least one thing before he rid himself of the hair appendage.

"Bella, I'll get rid of my lip beard, but first I was hoping you might let me see if it tickles you in a more…privatearea," Edward finished with a mischievous smile.

With a giggle and a squeal, Bella took off for the bedroom, and without missing a beat- Edward followed suit with a gleam in his eye and a twitch in his mustache.

O_o

"Well, that is certainly peculiar," nurse Bripete thought aloud as she looked at the test results in front of her.

"Dr. Flores. I think there is something you should see. We have some of the labs back from Monday's appointments."

Dr. Flores walked quietly toward his favorite nurse. After all, nurse Bripete was very loyal, hardworking and…dedicated to Dr. Flores. "Bring them to my office and close the door," his voice rang down the hallway.

Dr. Flores looked up from the chart he was inspecting when he heard the lock click on his office door.

"Hmmm, you doctor, have been a baad boooy!" nurse Bripete said as she clawed at her chest. She couldn't wait to give the doctor his punishment.

"Ohhh, nurse Bripete!" The two medical professional clashed together in a heated embrace, kissing and ripping clothing. It had been too long since they'd last succumbed to the temptation of the other.

Crocs and white coats were flying about the room, and peculiar test results were forgotten in lieu of a forbidden affair.

"Doctor…is that a stethoscope in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" Dr. Flores just snickered and resumed his assault on nurse Bripete's chest.

Nurse Bripete never wanted her reputation called into question, so the test results she'd brought in to discuss with Dr. Flores were still at the back of her mind. She paused the dance like rhythm of their bodies, calling the doctor to question.

"What…oh God…about…holy moly…the test…right there…results…yes, yes, YES!"

As the pair finished their tryst, Doctor Flores said something nurse Bripete had been dying to hear. "Come home with me. I can't let you go. Let the files, test results and the patients all go to hell. Let's just stay in bed all weekend."

They were words the young nurse had longed to hear. She gathered herself and her clothing, ready to continue their rendezvous. "Should I let Lacey know we won't be in tomorrow? Oh- and what about Miss Swans test results?"

"I will call in and tell Lacey to reschedule all our appointments for tomorrow for another time. And don't worry about Miss Swan's test results. I'm sure it's something that will wait until Monday morning."