Warnings- angst/romance
Spoilers- Speculation on some storyline rumors for 2nd half S2 -- Essentially, this is what I thought Black Market was going to be...I was way off...and if I might say...my story is way better!
Pairing-K/L
Disclaimers-I don't own these characters, Ron Moore does
Chapter 13
As they draw nearer, Hannah's features come into clearer focus and in contrast Kara's heartbeat becomes progressively more erratic. She seems oblivious to their approach, completely immersed in the simple joys of crayon, paper, and imagination. There's purity to the way Hannah's concentrating on drawing lines that make no shapes or discernable figures and Kara knows in that instant, that she'll do anything to keep the wraiths' of war and death from intruding on her innocence.
Lee's knees nearly buckle underneath him when they get within two feet of the little girl. He's paralyzed by the way Hannah sticks her tongue out of the corner of her mouth, just as he'd seen Zach do a thousand times in their youth whenever he was concentrating on something he deemed 'important'. Lee had all but forgotten the peculiar habit until he set eyes on his niece today. Finally a breath of air rushes out of his lungs and it must have been dramatic because the fluid trail of colors stops and slowly a pair of soft brown eyes rise up to meet his. He can hear Kara stifle a gasp beside him at the same instant his heart clenches.
The fear and doubt melt away as Lee lowers himself down on one knee, "Hi." It's all he can think to say and yet he feels as though he's just cracked his soul wide open with one syllable. Her furtive eyes glance over Lee's form in appraisal, finally stopping at his eyes.
Hannah places one chubby hand, high against the side of Lee's face, shows him a cerulean colored crayon, and proudly proclaims, "Blue."
Lee can't control the short burst of laughter that escapes him anymore than the tears that trail down his face.
Hannah captures the rouge tears with her angelic little fingers and her face scrunches up in visible concern. "Ow?"
Lee shakes his head for emphasis, "No. Happy tears." He smiles to reassure her, and the child nods briefly before turning her gaze up and over Lee's shoulder.
This whole time, Kara's kept a step back from Lee and Hannah to give them space and a moment to connect. At least that's what she tells herself. But it seems Zach's daughter will tolerate none of her cowardice. Hannah pushes up from her seated position with a helping hand from Lee and she rewards his kindness by entrusting him with her blue crayon. She takes three wobbly steps but manages to never break eye contact despite her uneven gait. Kara feels as though she's caught in the cross-hares, but instead of running or fighting, her first instinct is to hold tight to the fear and draw closer to its source.
Hannah extends her hand with absolute trust and when Kara takes it, it feels as though her own bone deep scars are healing over. The precocious toddler steers her over to her work station and tugs gently down, demanding, "Sit."
Kara obliges and Lee immediately joins her. When Hannah releases her grip, Kara has to suppress the desire not to let go. On cue, Lee slips his hand into hers, squeezing tightly and filling the void.
Hannah busies herself with splaying out her art work and supplies before them. Once done, she stares at them expectantly and eagerly chants, "Color, Color."
She squeaks with delight when Kara picks up the yellow and orange pencils and begins creating a sunrise on the blank canvas. Lee leans in close to her, his breath warm on her cheek as he uses the blue crayon to draw a seascape horizon for her sun's descent.
Lee can't help but smile at the picture he and Kara create. Her artistic talent is evident even in this simplistic format. Her sun is teeming with solar flares and he can almost remember what the lick of sunshine feels like. The way she smudges the waxy film to shade around the edges gives the effect of a humid, hazy dusk. By comparison his ocean waves are simple and one-dimensional...child-like. It appears that even Hannah thinks she can do better because she takes the crayon from Lee's loose grip and turns the paper around in order to make her mark on their first family project.
Hannah smiles brightly and scribbles madly across their work and Kara can't help but feel the little scamp's wild blue streaks add much needed life to Lee's sad little ocean. A bark of laughter erupts from her lips at that thought and inadvertently causes a petulant pout to form on Hannah's face. "Oh sweetie, I'm sorry. I'm not laughing at you. I'm just happy that you're improving Lee's part of the picture."
"Lee?" Hannah's gaze shifts questioningly between the two of them as if trying to determine who's who.
Kara is startled to realize that they never properly introduced themselves. She glances at Lee, whose smile has not diminished despite her harsh artistic critique.
Lee extends one hand, palm up, towards Hannah, while pointing at himself with the other. "I'm Lee." He swallows the lump in his throat, "I'm your uncle."
It's clear from the way her face contorts that Hannah doesn't understand the familial reference. But that thought is quickly undermined when she pulls Lee's world out from underneath him with one word, one question, "Daddy?"
Lee is glad that he's sitting on the floor already because his body would not have withstood the blow Hannah just administered. The trust in her eyes, the hope radiating all around her is the most humbling and frightening thing he's ever experienced. Kara's hand has found its way to his shoulder and with a deft squeeze she reminds him that he's not alone in this…not in his fear or in his dreams. Lee takes his niece's…no his daughter's hand, and brings it to his chest. "Yes Hannah," her eyes watch him carefully, "I'm going to be your Daddy now."
"Mama?" she insists.
Lee's eyes water with unshed tears for a woman who he'll never know, a woman who left him this precious gift. "She's gone sweetie." Her eyes drop down and to the side, but return to his with an unexpected fire crackling beneath.
"Mama." Not a question this time, but a demand. Her lip trembles and her skin flushes red as the force of drawing quickening breathes rises to a dizzying pace and tears stream down her cherub like cheeks.
Shear instinct compels Lee to draw her into his arms and cradle her tight. He rocks her slowly as she continues to whimper into his neck, "Mama…ma..ma." Her plea shatters into mere syllables as she hiccups that unanswerable prayer over and over. For all his cooing and whispers of encouragement, Hannah's tirade doesn't subside until Kara rubs a soothing stroke down her back.
Hannah pulls her puffy face from the crook of Lee's shoulder to stare at her and Kara's hand freezes in place. Her finger tips are immersed in Hannah's brown locks…her hair feels soft and fine, exactly like the strands of Zach's baby hair that she and Lee held yesterday.
Hannah disentangles herself from Lee's grasp and turns her body to face Kara. She wipes her nose across her sleeve and cocks her head to the side, "Who you?"
Kara realizes that she's still holding Hannah in a half embrace and she drops her hand from the girls back self-consciously before answering, "I'm Kara." Those brown orbs stay locked on hers, waiting patiently for more. Zach was a master of using silence to force her to open up, and although she knows that it's unlikely that a toddler is using psychology against her, Kara can't help but note the similarity. "I'm going to help Lee take care of you." Lee's warm hand finds its place at the small of her back and a dollop of serenity seems to accompany it. "Is that okay?"
Hannah looks between the two pilots, as if trying to decipher something important. She takes one of their hands in each of hers, "Daddy" she nods at Lee and turns a shy smile to Kara, "Kawaa." It seems Hannah has inherited her father's ability to put those around her at ease, because despite the surreal circumstances, the dynamic between the three of them feels almost natural.
Lee gathers his girls into a warm embrace and he knows that he will never forget this moment. As Kara kisses his cheek and he feels Hannah's tiny arms snake around his neck, Lee dismisses the theory that love is intangible. Anyone who says different is to be pitied, because they obviously never held their family in their arms.
Kara feels Lee entangle his hand with hers at the base of Hannah's neck. His fingers slide reverently over the silver band on her thumb and she catches his eye. She gently extracts her hand from his and cups Hannah's face lightly, "Hannah, do you see this ring?"
The little girl wraps her hand around Kara's entire thumb and Lee is assaulted by the memory of Zach holding his finger in just that way. He's never been a man of faith, but the scriptures echo in his mind as this scene unfolds…all of this has happened before and will happen again. For the first time, that notion of a cycle of time seems fraught with hope.
"A long time ago, a very special man by the name of Zach gave me this ring and asked me to be a part of his family…the Adama family." Kara swallows back the threatening tears, "But we lost him."
"Mama?"
Kara manages a dewy smile at the youngster's ability to follow, "Yes, he's gone. Zach is with your Mama in heaven." Hannah nods slowly, not entirely convinced but still enthralled. Kara slips the ring off her finger and is only mildly surprised when Lee places a chain in her hands. She sees him tuck his dog tags into his front pocket and takes a moment to marvel at how in synch they are.
"Hannah, Kara and I want you be part of our family." Lee watches as the child pulls her attention away from the glittering band to stare at him, "Do you want to come live with us?"
Her face scrunches in deep thought for a moment before asking, "Ada?"
Lee looks to Kara who smiles her Starbuck-knows-all grin, "That's right," she puts the chain around Hannah's neck, "You'll be an Adama."
Hannah admires her new trinket before nodding excitedly, "Ada, Ada!"
Lee smiles through the fresh tears, content to let them fall and honor this bright shiny moment. Kara stops one with her thumb, rubbing the salt over his lips before capturing them in a smoldering kiss.
Hannah draws them a part with an insistent, "Me. Me."
Lee looks down at her and can't help the jubilant smile that spreads across his face. "You want a kiss too." He swoops down, picking her up and she squeals with delight. Lee plants a series of light kisses across her cheeks while Kara tickles her sides until she giggles out a "Nooo!"
Kara knows a surrender decree when she hears one and promptly stops her assault. She ruffles Hannah's hair and asks, "So nugget, you ready to go home?"
The reply comes out as a half yawn, "Yeah."
Kara watches as Hannah drops her head to Lee's shoulder, eyes drooping, and thumb secure in her mouth. After tucking a few errant strands behind Hannah's ear, she gets an unobstructed view of an angel sleeping on the shoulder of a God. "Fatherhood looks good on you Lee."
There's honesty, if not a little sass in her tone and Lee pauses to turn and face her, "You're going to be an incredible mother Kara." Her smile falters and Lee tips her chin up to meet his eyes, "What you did today," he runs his finger over her naked thumb, "was phenomenal. You selflessly gave Hannah an inheritance and a touchstone for her new family."
"Yeah, well," heat is blossoming across her cheeks, "Let's just hope she doesn't swallow it."
Lee tugs her closer, pressing the small family together, "Now I just need to get you a new ring."
Her eyes are brilliant fractures of green and gold, "That right?"
Lee closes the infinitesimal gap between them and kisses her until they're both breathless. "That's right."
Kara chuckles softly, "Are you actually challenging me to marry you?"
"I love you Kara Thrace," Lee dons his cockiest grin, "but I have no doubt that our marriage will be a constant battle for dominance."
"In that case," Kara trails wet kisses from the corner of Lee's mouth, along his jaw, and up to his ear, "Let the games begin."
Author's Note: SURPRISE!! It may have taken...like a year, but I'm finally done! I'd love to hear feedback about this story...even if it's a well deserved lashing for banishing it to limbo for months. I couldn't come up with an ending that I liked, but thank god for Leinenkugel's Berry Weiss beer...it's my slightly tipsy new muse. What do you think...should I use her again. I was thinking about throwing in a bonus chapter for this story about a 6 months in the future...pure humorous fluff. Any takers?
As always...hugs for readers and kisses for reviewers. Cheers!