IAMX—Insomnia & Wildest Wind

A.N. So I've given this chapter a couple songs (above) to set the mood, and dedicated it to one of my favorite groups, IAMX. Chris Corner truly is gifted, and the tone of his music keeps me enthralled with this story. And if you listen to it by chance, maybe you'll see the world/atmosphere I'm trying (and probably failing lol) to develop for this story.

Have Fun ;)

Present—Kuvira's Apartment—6:30 PM

"Did you sign it—"

"Kuvira I don't want to talk about it." Suyin quickly averted her eyes. "I can't…I don't want to think about it right now."

Tension lingered in the air between them.

Feeling bad about being curt, Suyin swallowed the lump in her throat and looked back up to Kuvira. Tears behind her eyes threatened to well, but she just hoped it didn't show.

Not wanting to confront the pain in Suyin's eyes, Kuvira dropped her gaze to Suyin's hands, watching her twist the gold diamond ring around her finger over and over again.

"Bataar's a good guy." Suyin looked at her hands with a saddened smile finding its way to her lips. "…too good." Her words were just above a whisper.

Kuvira looked at Suyin and back to the ring. She'd be lying if she said she wasn't waiting, somewhat eagerly, for the moment Suyin took it off her finger.

And then, sooner than she expected, the moment came.

Suyin took in a breath, releasing it with a gentle sigh as she slid the ring off her finger and gingerly set it on Kuvira's nightstand. She stared at it for a second, knowing she'd broken the promise it symbolized. Soon her gaze drifted over to Kuvira's bare feet, up her jeans, over her shirt, and finally to her eyes. But seeing almost no consolation in Kuvira's eyes, Suyin looked back to her hands. "It's not as easy as it might look…I've worn that ring for twenty years." She rubbed the naked skin around her finger. "I've known him a very long time…shared everything with him…" Her words trailed off as Kuvira gazed out of the bedroom doorway. "I know him better than I do you."

Kuvira looked back.

On that aspect, Suyin was very right. There was so much about her the lawyer didn't know.

"And I've lost everything…" Suyin opened her unfolded hands, pointing them toward the ground as if every precious family memory slipped through her fingers like the first handful of dirt to cover a casket. "…to take this gambling chance that you might love me as much as you say you do."

Watching Suyin's eyes meet hers, Kuvira was stilled by the dark warning in them. After everything she'd done, Kuvira wasn't surprised that Suyin wanted nothing less than one hundred percent from her. Trampling on Suyin's expectations and taking her for granted was something the older woman wouldn't let her do. And she made that abundantly clear without having to say anything at all.

Moving closer, Kuvira crouched in front of Suyin, looking at the slender hands in front of her then up to those saddened eyes with a relaxed smile, feeling much like a child listening to a wise storyteller. She was relieved when Suyin's demeanor softened and her gentle smile was returned. The hands before her lifted, resting on her shoulders with a reassuring squeeze.

"You're very special to me."

"Am I?" Kuvira smirked, stretching her arms out to the bed, trapping Suyin between them. The hands at her shoulders slowly travelled up, bringing a nurturing warmth to her neck.

Kuvira hung her head over Suyin's lap and closed her eyes, letting her senses take over. She felt the muscles in her chest relax against the tips of Suyin's jean-clad knees.

A perception of stillness came to mind as the bedroom sat nearly silent; the setting of the evening sun slowly draining the room of light. Sensations of soothing ease washed over her as Suyin's hand gingerly brushed over her hair. And Kuvira had to admit, she wouldn't be ashamed to be a spoiled house pet, if this truly was how it felt to have tender hands rub their fur as they leaned into their master's touch.

But the reality was that luck, intertwined with a small twist of fate had everything to do with where she was. After her outburst, it would have been rightful, even expected, for Suyin to have thrown her out of her life. But now Kuvira felt forgiveness in Suyin's touch…one that seemed almost too quickly given.

"Mhm."

Above her, Suyin's focus wandered as she stroked and twisted a few strands of dark hair between her finger tips; her elbow resting on her thigh and her hand beneath her jaw.

Kuvira looked up, seeing nothing but a dull expression where Suyin's smile had just been. Letting her eyes drift down, tracing the outline of Suyin's neck, she stopped and stared long enough to catch the subtle pulse beneath her tan skin.

She glanced back up, but Suyin didn't notice. To break the woman from her thoughts, Kuvira pressed her hands to Suyin's thighs and slid them up, getting a good grasp around her lower back. Pushing off the balls of her feet, Kuvira reached out, grabbing a wad of sheets behind Suyin as she pulled them onto the bed.

Content and comfortable, with her leg draped between Suyin's, Kuvira closed her eyes once more, resting the side of her face against the fresh smelling sheets. But feeling a couple pokes on her stomach, Kuvira figured that was her cue to turn over and not crush Suyin under her weight. And she did.

Pressing the woman's body to hers, Kuvira rolled onto her back, not opening her eyes to even peek at the ones now watching her. "Tell me how special I am."

"…no…"

Kuvira opened an eye, seeing a small grin form on Suyin's face.

"I'm not going to feed your ego." Came the soft response as Kuvira gave a smug grunt and closed her eye.

"…I thought you had passed out or something."

"What?" Suyin was taken back by Kuvira's sudden turn of subject, forcing her to think of what her lying on the kitchen floor looked like to Kuvira. "Oh…No."

"Good." Kuvira smiled. "I don't think I'd stick around to watch your downward spiral."

Suyin slapped Kuvira on the cheek, watching the woman below jolt and turn away, rubbing the area like a disciplined child. "After what you've put me through you better stick around..." She yanked Kuvira's jaw to her, staring down into her eyes with a furrowed brow. "If I get the crazy idea to jump off a mountain cliff…you're coming with me."

"I was joking." Kuvira chuckled at Suyin's unnerving gaze, her cheek still stinging. "I know that's not you."

*Bzzzzt Bzzzzt*

Wedging her hand into her back pocket, Kuvira grabbed her phone, stretching her arms up behind Suyin's head to read the notification. Unable to focus past the eyes searching her face as she felt Suyin sigh, Kuvira lowered her phone and rolled them over, kissing Suyin's forehead, rubbing her back in reassurance, relieved once Suyin finally relaxed. Her hand's strokes became lighter and gentler, just grazing Suyin's back as she opened the message; her bicep pinned beneath Suyin's head.

"1 Message"

'…anonymous.' Kuvira eyed it suspiciously before clicking it.

"Good Evening my beloved reaper, ready to come out of retirement?

Meet me at the club tonight, unarmed, for a friendly chat.

You don't have a choice.

I know where you are. Does 236 Turnover dr, apt# 61 sound right?

Others are watching you, don't try to run.

—Nero"

Kuvira paled and sat up with a start, all but throwing the woman off her, clenching her teeth to avoid grinding them. The blood in her veins went cold, shooting through her like ice, freezing, numbing all sense of feeling along its path.

Behind her, Suyin lifted herself from the pillows, taking full notice of the sudden distress on Kuvira's face, watching her fingers turn white as she clutched the phone in her hand.

"Kuvira?"

She didn't look at Suyin.

"Kuvira what is it?"

She didn't hear the growing urgency in the voice behind her.

At the thought or mention of that man, a stabbing, searing pain rushed through her chest, gripping her heart like a vice; the rest of her body sitting paralyzed.

Two Decades Earlier

"Performance charts came back sir."

The office door opened just a hair from the outside; a small pair of emerald eyes peeking through a sliver.

"…and?" A deep male voice crawled through the concrete room; a dim, pulsating orange glow spilled across the floor, reaching out from the fire place, creeping up the wall until it was washed out by overcoming darkness.

"Their marks are not where we expected them to be. Some have fallen dangerously behind the rest."

"Kill them. We don't keep weak links. If they are not up to par, then my money is being wasted." A blue-eyed man, broad-shouldered and tall, turned from the two-way mirror looking out to an empty shooting range and stalked forward, crossing the room to his desk; the fire place's glow outlining the adviser's figure where he stood beside a lone armchair; his gaze pointing down the moment their eyes made contact. "Understood?"

"M-Must they be killed sir?" He dared to speak out.

"To maintain the integrity and secrecy of this organization, yes, wouldn't you agree?"

"…I-I don't se—"

Taking the chart from the adviser, the brawny man walked over to a black suited henchman and held out his other hand.

Without thinking or looking into his eyes, the guard retrieved the gun from his holster and placed it in the man's hand.

Turning around, the man's chilling gaze met the adviser's. "My trust in you has been lost." Lifting the weapon, he didn't hesitate to pull the trigger, watching the bullet punch into the man's heart; the aim dead on. He watched the unlucky adviser collapse to the floor; a tense in his brow forming as the man's blood ran out towards his favorite handmade rug in the sitting area. But then it stopped inches away from the corner, and he let go of his held breath. Handing the gun back to his henchman, he offered a small smile. "Seems I need a new adviser." He looked to the door and his brow creased. "Wasn't this door closed?"

"Yes sir." The henchman responded without looking at the door once.

A malevolent smile stretched the muscles across his squared jaw. "Then who could it be?" He took a few steps and ripped the door open; the girl on the other side falling on her butt with wide eyes.

She looked into his icy blue eyes, not being able to decipher the man's intent. Then a hand reached out to her. She stared at it and the thick silver rings adorning his fingers for a while, feeling forced to raise her own, only for him to grab it before hers touched his palm. He dragged her into the office and bent down to hoist her up; the girl coming face to face with the seven-foot bald henchman. "Look at those eyes, are they not the greatest?"

"Yes sir."

With a hearty laugh the man turned around and put the six-year-old on the floor. When she gasped at the bloody body before her, he held his hand to her back, making sure she couldn't back away.

"That's nothing to be scared of…"

The girl tensed as the man crouched beside her and trapped her with an arm around her shoulders. She scrunched her face as his sharp piney scent burned the inside of her sensitive nose, along with the cologne-like smell of the gel in his perfectly styled, thick head of dark hair.

"There's no need to be scared. This is the natural order of life, we will all end up this way someday." The girl tried to hold her breath as long as she could when he spoke to ward off the sour sting from his. She was getting used to it though, everybody drank the golden-brown stuff in the glass bottle. They never gave any to her. But sometimes she'd peek out of her room, into the dark hallway at night, and see them entering the room next to hers with a glass bottle, but sometimes the liquid had no color, making her wonder if water came in glass bottles too. Although…it wouldn't make sense for them to be giving them water at night. She certainly never got any.

"You are my favorite. I see a lot of myself in you."

The man started speaking again, but the girl's eyes couldn't look away from the dead body he had forced her in front of. So much blood pooled out of the nice chubby man—that's what her friends called him. Once a week he'd pass out cookies to her and the other kids. She always ended up with peanut butter, her favorite, but she'd only eat half, folding the rest in a small square of tattered fabric before hiding it beneath her pillow.

"You'll continue to make me proud, right?"

The girl turned her head to meet the man's harsh gaze, his blue eyes set ablaze, intensified by the fire's glow. Looking down to the thick silver chain hanging from his neck between his partially open black button down, she watched it swing a little with his every breath.

"Hmm?"

A finger came to her chin, lifting her face to his once more. She wanted to look away, he made her uncomfortable as she gazed at his sunken eyes, the dark circles beneath them, and his near grey complexion. But she nodded to his question anyway.

"Good. I would truly hate for you to end up like the others." A silent pause lingered between them. "Come. It's time for you to go to sleep." Nero stood lifting her with him and she didn't have any option but to put her arms around his neck. As he neared the door, the suited guard stepped forward. "No, I'll take her myself."

The guard stepped back to the wall, immersing himself in the shadows.

Nero held her to his chest with one arm under her bottom for support, but not falling was up to her.

Her little hands clang to his silky-smooth tailored shirt as she looked over his shoulder, watching them pass through the dreary and dank concrete halls; dim, grated fluorescent lights illuminating the way.

They came to a stop, standing in front of a metal door.

The iron hinges groaned as he pulled back the entrance to her cell; the number 4671 written on the door's front in white spray paint.

She was lowered to the ground and set on her feet, where she gazed up at his towering form; the lack of light almost making his face indiscernible.

"In bed." His voice commanded her.

Understanding the order, she walked to her cot and pulled back the cold blankets to climb in. She laid down watching the door close in the corner of her eye; darkness engulfing the room. The door screeched on the other side as the locking mechanism scrapped against the metal. She closed her eyes, squeezing them, waiting for it.

*clang*

That harsh sound of the bolts shoving themselves into specified grooves always made her shiver a little. But now, she knew she was locked in.

Present—11:45 P.M.

"Kuvira?"

With her forehead against the bathroom wall, Kuvira stared down at the towel rack below her; a cell phone to her ear.

"Kuvira?"

"I'm going."

"What the-y-you aren't ready, walking in there is suicide."

"Of course I'm ready, this is what we were trained for."

"When was the last time you shot a weapon?"

"Doesn't mean I forgot."

"Kuvir-"

"I'm done." Kuvira's eyes shot into a glare.

"Kuvira listen-"

"No. I'm sick of running."

"What about Suyin?"

"That's why this needs to end."

"And what do you plan to do? I see two outcomes to this meeting. He either reels you back in, or kills you for deserting."

Kuvira saw the same outcomes playing in her mind.

Nero would most likely have enough guards and reapers around to shoot her dead. There was no way she'd kill all of them and make it out alive. Slamming her fist to the wall she growled.

"…I'm sorry I didn't catch it…I'm still not sure how he went over my head."

Kuvira heard guilt softening her friend's normally energetic voice.

"Kuvira?" Suyin called her, presumably after hearing her slam.

Furrowing her brow, Kuvira glanced to the closed bathroom door out of the corner of her eye. "…This ends tonight." She dropped the phone from her ear and ended the call. Taking a breath, she pushed herself from the wall and walked to the door. Stopping inches from the knob, she lifted her hand, setting it against the wood, knowing she'd have to look into Suyin's eyes and lie once again. But she was getting tired of it. Sliding her hand to the knob, she twisted, opening the door to Suyin; the other woman's hand preparing for another knock.

They stared at each other for the longest time.

"What?"

Kuvira tried loosening her brow as she gazed into confused eyes, but couldn't. She reached out, taking Suyin's arm with a gentle grip.

"What happened?"

Passing over the confounded tone in Suyin's voice, Kuvira's gaze fell to her hand, watching her fingers slip into the collar of Suyin's shirt, continuing beneath the silky fabric and stopping to cup the corner of Suyin's shoulder.

"What is it?" Suyin took Kuvira's wrist into her hand and didn't move as Kuvira's hand slid along her skin, back to the side of her neck.

Not sure what to do, Suyin cautiously reached out with her free hand, taking Kuvira's shirt into her grasp.

'You're special to me too.' Kuvira stayed silent, letting her mind admit what she wouldn't say. She closed her eyes and lowered her head feeling a rush of adrenaline surge through her as she thought of their bodies together, Suyin's skin meshing with hers. She needed that revival. "It doesn't matter. I promise." Pulling Suyin closer, she placed their lips together, her nose nudging into Suyin's. She wanted to forget, as her other hand travelled to Suyin's waist. Chills —the good kind— rushed up her spine, tingling the skin in its wake; her fingers slowly curling around Suyin.

*bang, bang*

Gunshots surrounded her, ripping her mind from the kiss; they rang in her ears.

Kuvira's eyes opened, anxiety fluttering her heart watching Suyin kiss her back; the woman knocking their knees together as she leaned in for more.

*bang, bang*

Kuvira saw red, her brow tensed. 'I can't.'

"Let's have fun." Suyin pulled away from her; a mischievous smile stretching across her face and a gentle hand finding its way to the base of Kuvira's jaw.

But Kuvira was frozen, unable to move when Suyin pulled her forward, and she watched the look in Suyin's eyes fade from aroused to puzzled.

Taking Suyin's arm, Kuvira reeled her back into her grasp. "When I come back…promise." Kuvira went to rest her forehead against Suyin's but was caught off guard when Suyin pulled away and looked into her eyes with a tensed brow.

"Come back from where? It's eleven o'clock at night."

Kuvira's eyes searched Suyin's, her silence incriminating. "I'm going to see a friend, that's all. It shouldn't take long." She averted her eyes from Suyin's intimidating gaze.

Right there, Suyin wanted to burst out, berating Kuvira for thinking she'd actually fall for that horrible lie, as though she'd never heard it before in her forty-five years. Kuvira should've known, you can't lie to a lawyer. A bad one maybe, but not her. However, this time, Suyin held her tongue, letting Kuvira turn her back to her and leave without another word.

Disappearing into her walk-in closet adjacent the bed, Kuvira grabbed a leather belt off its rack and looped it through her jeans. 'It's better if she doesn't know.' She tightened the buckle. 'But you're an idiot if you think a woman like Suyin is never going to find out.' Her mind fought against her, replacing falsely justified thoughts with realistic ones.

Pulling out her phone, Kuvira watched Suyin walk past the closet entrance out of the corner of her eye, surprised the semi-controlling woman didn't try to barge in and demand more answers. 'This phone was supposed to be clean.' Powering on the screen, Kuvira typed in a pin and there it was, the same message staring back at her.

'Is there no way out of this?' She wondered, only wanting to feel alive after so many years of feeling stone-hearted. Suyin brought life to her being, purpose to her existence, and something more, humanizing the indoctrinated killer. Responding to orders like an obedient drone once more was the last thing she wanted to do. But Kuvira knew it well enough, Nero was a monster. Not obeying the text had its consequences. It might have been a bluff. But either way, him or someone connected to him knew where she was.

Suyin was in danger.

With a furrow in her brow, Kuvira turned, moving to the very back of the closet as she pushed the phone into her pocket. Kneeling, she spread apart her assortment of jeans and trousers to reveal a small square safe. 'Shit.' Her finger froze over the number pad. '43…983…968, no.' Her eyes brightened. '43985.' She quickly punched the numbers in and glanced over her shoulder, making sure Suyin wasn't spying on her before she opened the safe.

Inside she found her second colt, still stored within the burnished leather double holster, and beside it, a closed wallet with a black credit card lying on top. "The devil's card" that's what all assassins called that heavy, yet paper thin platinum rectangle. With all the information collected on an utmost secret server, the card became virtually untraceable. Any transactions made entered a "dark zone", to be immediately deleted after processing.

Laying her hand on the gun she hadn't touched in years, her skin met its cold metal; the whereabouts of its partner still a mystery. Sliding it out of the holster, she stood, lifting the back of her shirt to place the gun snuggly into her waistband.

'Back to it for one night. Last night.' Looking at her reflection in the full-length mirror, she noticed the heavy thumping of her heart and the clamminess of her sweaty palms.

She walked out of the closet and stood in the bedroom doorway looking out.

The kitchen disappeared; the couch, the dividing wall between the living room, even the entry way…everything faded; the walls turning into reinforced concrete with a near black color. The kitchen island became a bloody wooden table; a sharpened knife stabbed into its surface, and a scalpel on a tray beside it. Hanging above, the light fixture became a small, grated florescent bulb, giving off a cold blueish white hue. Her eyes focused on the table. She could still hear the horrific pleas of mercy from the kids who didn't pass Nero's tests.

"Kuvira?"

The assassin's eyes searched for the voice, finding Suyin standing in the middle of her mind's concoction. Their eyes connected, but she didn't let hers linger for long, walking out of the doorway without answering Suyin as the familiar sight of her apartment came back, concrete walls fading to warm dry wall.

Following Kuvira to the front door, Suyin rounded the dividing wall, finding Kuvira sitting on the floor pulling on her pair of black waterproof boots. "Are you sure everything's okay?" She watched Kuvira's hands stop, taking note of the ominous look on Kuvira's face.

"Yeah." Kuvira answered without looking up as she laced up the last boot and stood. She took her jacket off the coat rack and slipped her arms through the sleeves. Only then did she look back to Suyin, meeting the woman's puzzled gaze, feeling bad for the added worry in her eyes. Walking to Suyin, Kuvira reached out and dragged her into a hug. "Don't worry about it, I'll be back soon…" She rested her chin atop Suyin's head. "...then I'll tell you everything."

'Tell me everything?' As Kuvira leaned down for a kiss, Suyin stunted her quest by pulling away, looking into Kuvira's eyes with hesitance.

Seeing Suyin's rejection as nothing but a bad omen, Kuvira clenched her jaw and let Suyin go. Moving past the older woman, she made her way to the door, and was stopped, held back as her hand reached for the knob.

"Okay wait." Suyin had grabbed Kuvira's sleeve, taking a few silent steps in her socks across the hardwood. Lifting onto the balls of her feet, she put her arms around Kuvira's neck and kissed her.

The kiss was tender confusion at its best. Suyin didn't know why it felt so solemn, and Kuvira didn't know why she needed it but pulled away with a smile. Not saying any goodbye, she turned the knob and slipped from Suyin's grasp, heading out into the night.

Suyin's hand grabbed the open door as her eyes watched Kuvira get into the matte-finished muscle car in front of hers.

Something didn't feel right. She felt the uneasy beginning of a knot in her stomach.

Rushing back into the bedroom, Suyin picked up her suitcase and put it on the bed as Kuvira's car roared to life.

'Crap.'

Her hands flew to unzip the zippers, throwing the top up, plunging through the clothes all the way down to the bottom of the case. When her hands reemerged, cradled in them was Kuvira's other Colt 1911; the gun a dark beauty, high polished metal and wood giving it a stunning effect. She wanted to know the story behind it.

'Hurry.'

Snapping from her awe, she ran to the front door, dangerously sliding down the hardwood with a gun in her hand.

'Shoes.'

This was one of the few times she didn't contemplate what shoes to put on her feet. There wasn't any choice anyway. So, she shoved her feet back into the slip-ons she came in, glancing out in just enough time to see Kuvira's car braking at a stop sign towards the end of the street. She looked down to the gun again. 'God what am I doing?'

Ripping her coat off the hook, Suyin wrapped the gun inside.

Even at night when all seemed quiet, someone was always watching. And if anyone caught her running out of the apartment in hurry with a gun latched in her hand, there would be questions and suspicions to answer later.

She stepped out. "Keys." And lunged back in, running to the kitchen counter where her keys lay. She ripped them up, her fingers frantically fumbling through the keys as she shut the door too hard and turned to lock it. Smashing the key into the mechanism with a hard twist, Suyin pulled it out and rushed down the steps, cutting across the little grass yard to her car.

She wasted no time hopping in; her key already turned in the ignition without any thought. "I can still catch up." She looked out the windshield to a desolate, suburban like road lit by orangy street lamps and sped off; her foot just inches from flooring the gas.

A.N. If you made it here, thank you so much for reading, and I say that as genuinely as I can over text. Lol. I'm beaming right now as I type this, just happy to see another chapter done and ready after so long. If you like it or are interested in where this is going, feel free to support it, reviews always make my day. :)