Buffy sat on her bed, Indian style, with the book in her lap. Her eyes darted from word to word. With every word she became more shocked and more understanding as to what went on in this world.
The other Buffy knew of her future. She knew that she was going to be turned and that two years later people from an alternate universe would come and 'make it better'. The other Buffy's words floated into her brain, "You do what you have to do."
It was fate, and they all played a part in it. She still didn't understand what fate had required her to give up her life. What was the cause? Why did the other Buffy need to die like that?
Because two worlds cannot be the same. Came an answer in her head. But that was not good enough. It wasn't as if there was an apocalypse that needed her sacrificing. She was killed by Spike for god's sake, that was not sacrificial. It wasn't for the world.
She flipped to the third page of the chapter and continued reading. It didn't really go into perfect detail. It was kind of vague. It spoke of people coming to 'make it better' and that's it. She continued reading.
She found a passage about the fight with oneself for freedom and to defeat the beast within. It also said that this was another way of doing things, something along the lines of that she figured. The words were old and the paper was crumbled so it didn't make a lot of sense.
She flipped through the other pages hoping to find something more recent or a little more helpful when there was a soft knock on the door. "Come in." She said lightly.
She closed the book and put her head in her hands. She closed her eyes and turned around expecting to see Dawn, Willow, Giles or Angel.
She almost jumped up when she saw him. "Not expecting me, luv?" He asked cocking his head to the side.
Buffy gave a small smile. "I guess not."
"Buffy, I-."
She stopped him. Ever since she had found out Spike was the one who had turned her she had imagined this conversation. She had replayed it over and over in her head. She really didn't want to have it now.
"No, Buffy there are some things I have to say." He told her.
Buffy sighed and nodded. He continued, "I would never hurt you."
Buffy nodded and started to speak. "Let me finish?" He asked.
She nodded and he continued. "I needed you to know that. I don't want you to think that, back then I was an idiot and when Dru came-."
It was now Buffy's turn to speak. "Yeah I know that." Her face softened and she stood up. "That was a different you. You have a soul now, not only a chip."
Spike nodded and walked over to her. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was back."
"You had things you needed to get through and you didn't want to tell me over the phone, I get that." She said and nodded.
He nodded and smiled at her. "You're cookie dough eh?"
Buffy smirked at the reference.
He looked down. "Back with Angel."
She looked up at him. "Spike, I-."
"No." He said looking back at her. "I understand. He's your soul mate Buffy. Even I can see that. I'm fine just being friends with you. I care about you Buffy, I'm not going to lie, but I'm here for you. As a friend."
She nodded. "Thank you."
He was going to say something else but he stopped. He gave her a smile and then walked out.
She stared out the heavily draped window, a million things running through her head. At some point her eyes drifted down to the book again and she continued reading.
"How long has she been up there again?"
"Two hours twenty seven minutes and fifteen seconds."
Everyone in the lobby turned to Andrew who sheepishly pointed to the clock by the counter.
"What do you think she's doing?" Dawn asked.
Gunn shook his head. "My guess, nothing. She might have just needed to get away from all of you staring at her like she's going to explode. It doesn't help it that there is a vamp with her face but now you guys are backing off?
Willow shook her head. "No, I think you've got it wrong, mister. We're here for her. I mean I know exactly what she's going through I've had an encounter with a vampire that looked like me from an alternate universe."
"Have you had the fate of two worlds on your shoulders?" Gunn asked.
"Well no, but-." Willow paused. "Hey, what exactly is your point? You really don't know her, I'm her best friend!"
Gunn put his hands up. "I just was stating something."
Willow shook her head. "If something was bothering her and she needed to talk we would be there for her, I mean we've always been there for her."
Spike raised his eyebrows. "If my memory serves me correctly, what happened right before you closed the hellmouth?"
"That was nothing! We were just, well we needed to,-." Willow started and Dawn shook her head.
"We kicked her out." She said.
"You what?" Angel asked.
"We kicked her out." Xander said.
"Guys!" Willow said starting to get annoyed. "That was different, this is different. We're here for her now okay?"
Everyone nodded and grumbled.
"So, what do you think is in that book?" Andrew asked, fidgeting.
Buffy was never really into reading. When it came to the research thing that was her friends forte. She was more the, 'find what I'm looking for and I'll go kill it' sort of person. But there was something about this book that made her want to keep reading. Which was weird. But she knew that this was a book that she had to read for herself and she really didn't want anyone else reading it. It was something she needed to do alone.
After reading another chapter Buffy remembered something. Lorne had given her a piece of paper when she had sung for him. She fished through her pockets and found a folded piece of paper. When she unfolded it, she found an address on it. From her knowledge of L.A, she remembered that it was a club and bar just a little down from where Caritas was.
She walked down the steps leading down to the lobby and saw all of her friends sitting around waiting for her.
"Ah, the hermit emerges." Xander said. "What news do you bring us from the land of mysterious black books?"
Buffy smiled and looked at Faith. "How long has it been since you've been to a club?"
Faith shrugged. "A couple years, why?"
Buffy shrugged. "I figure we can all use some loosening up, and you know there might be informants or something."
Dawn stared at Buffy. "Are you serious? All of us, at a club…?"
"We have shopped for the occasion." Cordelia said.
"Good we'll go in an hour. The sun should be down by then." Buffy nodded at the group and went upstairs to get changed.
The club was dirty and filled with demons and it reminded Buffy of the Fish Tank down in docktown. The only thing was it didn't smell like fish, thank god for small favors.
"Are you sure this is the kind of club you wanted to go to, Buffy?" Dawn asked.
Buffy, who was in a daze while she tried to find exactly what Lorne wanted to show her, turned back to Dawn and shook her head trying to clear it. "Yeah." She said finally. She pointed to a chair in the corner by a table. "Sit there."
She turned around to the Willows. "Can you sit with her?"
Both Willows nodded and went to grab chairs. Dawn grumbled something about not being a kid and being able to watch over her.
Giles and Giles and the Wesleys and Freds went over to a table close to the one Dawn and Willow were sitting at. Cordelia joined them, as did Xander and Andrew and the Gunns. Faith went of to go dance with a man and the Angels, Spike and Xander stood with Buffy. Buffy stared at Angel for a moment. Then she turned around and walked toward the back. If anything were going to be here it would be back there.
In the back there was a bunch of crates and cobwebs but then there was a sheet over a doorway. Curious Buffy pulled the sheet away to see what was behind it. There was a whole other room and in it girls were passed out in chairs and on the floor.
Buffy ran to go check on one and found no pulse. She looked around at the others and wondered if they were dead too.
"It's too late for them." A scruffy looking man in the corner said. He had grey hair and a beard and his clothes were wrinkled, as was the skin on his face. He looked at least seventy but she knew he was younger than that.
"What happened to them?" Buffy asked, noticing needle tracks on the girls arm and two pierce marks where she was sure a vampire had drained them.
"They OD and they were drained." The main said.
"On what?"
The man didn't answer the question. "Its leads you down to hell, if you od. For a while it just gives you memories, good ones. The vamps love it. It's intoxicating." He spit out the last sentence.
He got up and smiled for a second looking down at the girl. "So beautiful." He said. Then he shook his head. "She was my daughter." He closed the girl's eyes and went back into the chair.
"What else does it do?"
"Sometimes the vamps are knocked out by it, it stables them. That's when we get them." He shook his head and stared at the girl on the floor.
Buffy wandered in the back rooms for a while before returning to the group.
"Everyone ready?" She asked.
"Finally." Andrew said and hopped up and almost ran out the door. "That gagnar demon was giving me the creeps."
Dawn smirked and walked over to Buffy. "You okay?" She asked her big sister.
"Uh huh." Buffy said as she continued walking in the direction of the hotel.
"Well, it's just you seem kind of distracted…"
Buffy turned to Dawn. "I'm fine Dawnie, just a little tired. How about you? Are you okay?"
Dawn smiled. "I'm fine."
Buffy brushed hair away from Dawn's face. "I'm sorry you had to come here and see this."
Dawn shook her head. "It's okay Buffy, there's nothing you could have done about it. Besides I'm fine, its you I worry about, we all worry about."
Buffy smiled. "I know. But I'm okay, really."
"Okay." Dawn said.
"Should we go tease Andrew about the Gagnar now?"
"We shall."
When they got back to the Hyperion everyone but Spike voted sleep.
"I'm tired." Andrew whined.
"Me too." Buffy said and yawned.
"Yeah, who wouldn't be? You spent like five hours reading a mysterious little black book." Xander teased.
Buffy folded her arms and yawned. "Reading does make you sleepy."
"Finally we figured out the age old myth." Xander said and everyone turned to him. Had he attempted a joke…?
Buffy smiled at him. "Night everyone."
"Night." Everyone said.
A knock came at Buffy's door. Buffy, clad in a cami and pajama pants opened it. She saw Angel, in his usual black pants black shirt attire.
"Hey." She said.
"Hey."
"Come in." Buffy said and opened the door wider for him.
He went in and stood in her room and she sat down on the bed.
"What's up?" She asked.
He shook his head. "Are you okay?"
She nodded. "Peachy."
"Then, what's going on?" He motioned over to the book lying on the bureau.
"It's complicated." She told him.
"How? What is it? What's in the book?" Angel asked.
"A lot of things, I still haven't figured it out yet." Buffy said.
"Then let me help you."
His face softened and she got up and kissed him. "We can figure it out in the morning, but now sleep."
He nodded and walked to the door.
"Do you have to leave now?"
He turned around and shook his head. She got in bed and he lay next to her. She rested her head on his chest and closed her eyes. He brushed the hair from her face and kissed her forehead. In a matter of minutes they were both asleep.
A/N: An update! And it wasn't months after the last one! Hopefully since its Summer I will be able to update more. Thank you so much for all of the reviews! Keep reviewing please they really help me update, believe it or not! Hope you enjoyed the chapter, I'll try to update soon!