"Well, here we are, the Resistance headquarters," Gorslax announced. Alfred looked up at a hotel.

"What?! This is where I'M staying!"

The two went in and up to the room.

"This is EXACTLY where I'm staying!" Alfred yelled, taking in the familiar furniture and the lack of a mint on the pillow.

"Yeah, well, you know, we could save a few bucks this way," Gorslax replied.

"Who is 'we'?"

"Hello again, Heart of America," said a familiar monotone voice.

"Norge?! What?!"

"Oh yeah, hey. I have no idea what's going on," greeted another familiar face.

"Oh shit! Arthur!" Alfred moved to Arthur's side. "Is Norge controlling your mind?"

"I don't think so. I don't think that's happening."

"It's all very complicated."

"Oh hey Ludwig," Alfred said.

"Hello."

"Welcome to the Resistance," Norge said.

"I'm not joining any resistance of yours, you destroyed America!"

"I will explain shortly. I believe you're already familiar with the baby."

"Oh nooo! I'm just a stupid babyyyyyy," The awkwardly vibrating baby whined.

"Yeah, I know that baby."

"Great." Norge cleared his throat. "Well then let me introduce you to those you don't know. The small sailor boy over there is Not A Country."

"My father's name was Not A Country! You can call me Is A Country!"

"Okay," Alfred deadpanned.

"The couple on the bed are Roderich and Elizabeta."

"Sup bro?" Elizabeta said.

"Nice to meet you," Roderich added.

"Well, look at Mr. Fancy over here."

"Well I'm sorry Elizabeta, for trying to be so polite!"

"Weird. You know, Liz, you kinda sound like Gorslax," Alfred commented.

"Oh shit, Gorslax is here?"

"Oh god," Roderich groaned.

Gorslax strolled up.

"Hey Elizabeta, how are you?"

"Friggin bored."

"Well, things are about to get pretty ridiculous."

"So you two know each other?" Alfred asked.

"You know the Horcruxes from Harry Potter?" Gorslax inquired.

"Those pieces of Voldemort's soul that he split off, to remain immortal?"

"Yeah, that's it! Basically Elizabeta's one of my Horcruxes."

"Weird."

"I'm like that big snake that eats all the good wizards!" Elizabeta chimed in.

"So what's going on here?!" Alfred demanded. "Why aren't we kicking Norge to death?"

"Because you are all targets of a greater enemy now," Norge replied. "Whatever you may think of me, or what I have done, there are powerful beings out there to destroy you. I am the only one who knows how to stop them."

"What do you think, Arthur?"

"I think I don't understand any of this well enough to give an informed answer."

"Well I say whaat? Nooooo! I'm just a stupid babyyyy."

"Why the baby?! Why is the baby here!?"

"Like I said, he's a target," Norge sighed. "Thanks to me, you're all targets."

"Except for me! I sorta just stumbled into this wacky situation!"

"Yes. Not A Country is here because Not A Country won't go away."

"Well if I wasn't here, who would be the funny guy?!"

"What aren't you telling us, Norge?" Alfred pressed.

"Nearly everything. I have kept and will continue to keep most of the important details to myself."

"Listen, I know I'm just old Gorslax, fifth dimensional demigod; but for what it's worth, I can sense wicked souls, but I don't sense one within Norge."

"Thank you, Gorslax. That brings me more comfort than you know."

"Alright, well, tell us everything that you can, America ASSASIN!"

"The beings who are out to kill you are trying to revert my work."

"That's what I'M trying to do!"

"If they succeed, the entire universe will be enslaved by them for all of time."

"Oh. Well I don't want that."

"I was not aware that they could follow me here. It was not within their capabilities. But thankfully, they have brought with them the instrument of their own destruction."

"What is this instrument you speak of?" Ludwig asked.

"Within me lies the ability to change reality. The invaders have a device with similar capabilities. But theirs can make irreversible damage."

"Why are they after us?" Arthur questioned.

"They don't know which of us has been changing reality. Methods for tracking such things are crude."

"So we're all in danger because you're too sneaky?" Alfred deadpanned.

"And because they are capable of, and willing to kill every person on this planet to find me."

"Uh OHHH!" Not A Country shouted.

"Oh my god, SHUT UP!" Elizabeta shouted back.

"Yes, that is rather distracting."

"It looks like somebody needs a time-out! Uh ohh, that somebody is mee!"

"I hate everything about Fug!" Alfred proclaimed. "The country, and its terrible people!"

"It appears you were not alone," Norge added. "It was only after the Fug colonies came into existence that the invaders took notice. I seem to be very close to finishing my work."

"So what's the plan, Norge?" Ludwig asked.

"The invaders have set up a base of operations in town at a nearby J.W. Marriott."

"They're staying at the J.W. Marriott?!" Alfred exclaimed.

"Yes. The J.W. Marriott provides all the luxuries and amenities an invading force could require. It was a perfect choice."

"I can't believe the aliens are staying at a nicer hotel than I am!"

"They are not aliens, exactly. It's hard to explain."

"I'm telling the chief 'Hey! You want me continue fighting alien crime? You better get me a room at the J.W.'"

There was an awkward pause.

"Moving on. Tomorrow, we will launch an assault on the hotel. Once inside, I will search their room for an access device that will teleport me to their control nexus."

"You sure know a lot about these invaders," Arthur commented.

"I do. I know nearly everything about them."

"So is everyone going along with this? Because I'm not convinced that kicking Norge in the face is not the better option."

"Yeah, I feel weird about how little information we've been given, considering the risks," Roderich agreed.

"Are you sure you're not just boring?"

"Excuse me, Elizabeta, for trying not be led into a giant trap!"

"We're going to be invading a J.W. Marriott, who cares if it's a trap?! It still sounds like a pretty good day, Roderich!"

"You have all witnessed the power of these beings," Norge interrupted before things could get out of hand, "They are after you. Helping me is your best chance for survival."

"I suppose I am in. Invading a luxury hotel sounds like a blast," Ludwig said.

"Sure, count me in too," Arthur added.

"I believe I've made my position known," Elizabeta declared.

"I'll sleep on it," Roderich said.

"Are you kidding me?!"

"Fine! Whatever, I'm in."

"I know I'm in!" Gorslax piped up.

"I'm just a stupid babyyyyyyy."

"Well it sounds like the yays have it!" Not A Country yelled.

"Alright, if you're all in, I'm in. But I'm watching you, Norge," Alfred warned. "And we're going to have a long talk about America when this is all over."

"We can have it now. It's only 4pm. We have a lot of time before tomorrow."

"Oh. Okay. America is great. Bring it back."

There was a short pause.

"Is that all you wanted to say?"

"Well, when I said 'long talk', I meant that I wanted to kick you in the face."

"Oh."

"I guess I'll just do that tomorrow."