"Acknowledge me as Zero!" Lelouch tried desperately, with every bit of authority he could muster.
Schneizel only shook his head. "I'm afraid you've already passed on that title, Lelouch."
That means I can't give him commands anymore.
"Zero wants you to let me go!"
"He doesn't even know you're here," Schneizel replied, making no move to disengage the obviously modified lock on the door.
Lelouch grit his teeth, cursing himself. Since having Schneizel handle all the guards at once made sneaking various supposedly dead people in and out so much easier, even Lelouch hadn't questioned allowing him full authority over Zero's personal guards. There shouldn't have been any harm in it, because as long as Schneizel believed Zero was the only one inside the security perimeter, the Geass would prevent him from making any hostile moves.
In this instance, however, Schneizel's authority likely meant that he had been able to simply order the guards out of his way, so that he could walk straight through to Zero's private suite. Even their privacy efforts now worked against them, as the very same soundproofing that kept voices inside Zero's and Euphy's suites also prevented anyone inside the suites from hearing something going on outside.
Lelouch momentarily debated trying to make a phone call for help, but it seemed like a foolish venture at present. Schneizel is more than smart enough to see through a crude distraction, and if I'm not fast enough to get my phone out and place a call before he grabs it, I'll have lost my best option for later. Worse, Schneizel might react by deciding to search him for further communications devices or weapons. Lelouch looked into his perfectly cold, rational gaze and decided that he didn't actually want to find out exactly how thorough Schneizel would be about that sort of thing.
I won't risk using the phone, unless I'm sure I can at least succeed in placing a call, Lelouch decided. His top priority was to avoid being revealed to the world, so as long as that wasn't happening, he was okay...relatively speaking. Thanks to the Code, I know he can't permanently kill me, he consoled himself. On the other hand, having the Code meant that Lelouch could be tortured indefinitely or made the subject of endless, painful experiments.
...At the very least, I can apparently knock myself out for a few hours, if it comes to that, he thought wryly.
Unfortunately, because Euphy wasn't expecting him, and C.C. would just assume he was busy fighting with Cornelia, no one would immediately realize anything was amiss. But if Schneizel is back then Nunnally must be, too, because I know Zero ordered him to go out to support her after we sorted out the mess with Cornelia. Again, though, Lelouch's own security precautions would be working against him. Because I've warned her how suspicious it is to visit Zero's suite when he's not here, Nunnally will probably wait to see me until Suzaku heads back. My best bet may be to try to stall until then.
Lelouch did his best to force his racing heart to calm.
Schneizel wouldn't have installed a modified lock if he intended to move me right away, and Suzaku said he'd be back before dinner, so it shouldn't be more than a couple of hours before he returns. I just have to hold out until he notices I'm gone and comes to find me.
"Why did you drag me in here, Schneizel?" Lelouch demanded, eyes narrowed.
In response, the man used a sweep of his hand to indicate a chessboard set up on a table in the center of the room. "I'd like to play a game—with stakes, of course."
Lelouch shot a quick glance back at the door. If he weren't mistaking the mechanism, the modified lock wouldn't open without a key, even from the inside, which in itself proved that Schneizel had definitely planned something in advance, but the chessboard eliminated any possibility that his planning had been made without knowledge of Lelouch's presence. So he was expecting to ambush me. He knew I was here.
This was basically his fear of global discovery made real on a smaller scale. How had Schneizel become aware of the Demon Emperor's survival, and could anyone else find out in the same way?
"You mentioned stakes?"
"If I win, I want you to point out to Zero every reason why it could be in his best interest to take back a particular order he gave."
Which order? Surely Schneizel isn't doing all this over the occasional midnight catfood run, or something like that?
Lelouch considered all the commands he knew Zero had given.
As long as it doesn't endanger Nunnally's safety, we can find a workaround.
Lelouch nodded. "If I win, you will tell me every way in which you became aware I survived my assassination."
"Agreed."
It was easy to nod confidently then, but Lelouch found that his palms were sweating even before the tenth move.
Should I fight for the center? Sacrifice my knight?
...No. No, my knight is too precious to do that. Even if Schneizel is in a better position...
But he is still so clever, he might be able to...
No, this may be my one chance. He is looking to achieve a good position, now, and he will look for the best possible situation to develop into at each move along the way, always seeking the best present.
But I believe in the future. Even if there are too many options, so that it's impossible to calculate, I'll gamble, that with the right pieces, I can...
The losses were piling up on each side, and Lelouch felt the weight of each pawn he managed to capture, the loss of everything he couldn't afford to keep.
You were always a little more cautious than me, Schneizel. You could have used your king to take my bishop, even if it would have prevented you from castling. This move will make it very hard for me to keep the initiative, though, so...
The most frightening part was that he couldn't actually see the future, when he was facing Schneizel. The stale, formulaic play of most Britannian nobles had nothing on Schneizel's brilliancies, and as the number of possible moves his opponent might make increased, the lines of potential futures split out into incalculable infinities.
But even if I can't exactly calculate the right path, that doesn't mean the future I want isn't there. Lelouch took another critical look at the situation, eyes narrowing as he focused in on clusters of pieces, strings of dependencies. Should I keep my last rook defended? No, I can force a rook exchange, and if I don't move my pawn now, I will lose all chance of promotion.
Sweeping his eyes over the board three moves later, all that remained were two kings, two queens, two bishops, two knights, a rook, and five pawns. They were exactly even in material, except that Lelouch had the two knights and two pawns while the rook and remaining pawns were Schneizel's.
My knights will be weaker now that the board had cleared this much, although with his king that far back, I may still be able to press my advantage...
Schneizel still had better control of the center of the board, his queen a potent threat, but Lelouch calculated through the squares, all the possible positions collapsing into patterns of white and black, gain and loss.
Two of his pawns are completely undeveloped, and his king...
Schneizel, you always had better moves to make, but leaving those wing pawns back there could cost you eventually.
If I move here...
"Check."
He'd used his first knight for a royal fork, which forced Schneizel to sacrifice his last bishop in order to save his similarly threatened king.
Then you'll do this...
"Check," Schneizel stated, but after playing it out twenty moves in every foreseeable direction, Lelouch merely moved his king further into the open, even if it did leave his own bishop undefended.
I can still do this. My king may be dangerously exposed, but at least I have the freedom of movement...
He slid his threats along the sides, trying to push the future into the configuration he wanted, even as Schneizel slid around his predictions with practiced ease. Finally, Lelouch moved into place so that he would be able to menace Schneizel's remaining rook on his next turn, well aware that the king's retreat would be the only way to unpin it.
You can't really afford to lose any more pieces, can you?
Of course, it went without saying that Lelouch couldn't, either.
Move your king, Schneizel, just a little further back...
Lelouch smiled. It took another five moves, but he finally advanced his pawn again, revealing a discovered check from his queen.
You'd love to use your undeveloped pawn to take mine, but you can't, because you're in check. You can just move your king further away, but if you do, then there will be nothing to stop my newly passed pawn from promoting and putting you in check again, so you'll have to...
Schneizel paused. "Do you wish to play it out?"
They could both calculate to the end result, now, but Lelouch nodded, having always preferred to play his games against Schneizel through to completion. Their moves were swift and smooth with the future already known, Lelouch's knights working together to trap Schneizel's king behind his own pawns.
Lelouch slid his queen across the board in the final move of the game.
"Checkmate." The word should have been perfunctory, but such a rush of adrenaline accompanied his victory that Lelouch was practically shaking. It almost hurt to unclench his fingers from his piece, his muscles were so cramped from clenching too hard.
His heart was actually thundering in his chest from a board game.
I can't believe it... He stared a the board in awe, trying to memorize every detail.
I beat Schneizel at chess...
I finally beat Schneizel at chess!
It was a dearly held childhood dream come true, and he looked up, smiling furiously at his adversary.
Schneizel met his gaze with a small smile of his own, his eyes fond and yet so very, very sad. "Well played. Very well played, little brother."
It hurt, somehow, to be called brother in such an unexpectedly sad voice, because part of Lelouch still remembered being a small boy staring at a chess board, working so very hard to win an acknowledgment from the older brother he'd admired. The rest of him, though, remembered being an Emperor fighting a war for the fate of the world, and that Emperor was furious.
You gave Nunnally the switch to fire F.L.E.I.J.A. and left her as bait, to die in the destruction of the Damocles! You dragged me into this room as your enemy, so get angry! Show me your frustration and contempt! Tell me that I cheated or that it was only blind luck, that my feelings of victory are just an illusion and that you'll attack again and again until you find my weak point!
Schneizel only gazed at him quietly, no hint of hostility in his posture or expression.
"Just what sort of game are you playing at, Schneizel?" Lelouch demanded, pushing away from the table to stand in indignant fury, angry most of all with himself, for letting the feelings of the past sweep him away for even a moment, when the present victory was only a cruel mockery of his childhood wish.
Even if to a lesser degree, it was the same stupid thing he'd done when he'd first seen his mother alive in the World of C—the part of him that was only hope and memory and aching emotion had been all too willing to accept the miracle without seeing the cold facts surrounding it. It had only made the pain worse when circumstance had finally forced him to realize that the mother he'd remembered being so strong and brave and vivacious had indeed been all those things, and yet she hadn't really been a mother at all. She didn't even understand the feelings behind Nunnally's smile. She never thought about them.
No matter how often I smile, you won't understand either, will you, Schneizel? He felt it shouldn't have hurt as much as it did, but although Lelouch had been surprised to hear Euphy profess that he was "Schneizel's favorite", in truth, he did remember a time when Schneizel had been important to him, at least. He'd been the perfect mentor, after all: eloquent and poised, helpful and so brilliant, generous with his time and with his wisdom, always patiently willing to explain his strategies or play just one more game with the younger sibling who'd once naively hoped to grow up to be like him. You were everything I could have wanted, Schneizel, except the brother that I thought I had.
What had once seemed like precious memories were rendered worthless, when stripped of the love he'd thought had underlain them, and part of him wondered what had been so very wrong with him, that neither of his parents had truly cared, that it took hearts as loving and open as Euphy's and Nunnally's not to immediately cast him aside, as soon as it was convenient. Do they care for me because I truly deserve it, or simply because they don't know how to feel any other way? Even Suzaku has admitted to hating me for a time.
"What is it you want with me?" he demanded of Schneizel, frustrated that the wounds of the past never seemed to completely finish healing, forcing him to rely on anger and stubborn pride to keep from showing any further weaknesses to his supposed sibling.
"On the Damocles, Lelouch, you told me that I lost to you because I was only willing to play games I knew I could win."
"I remember."
"It was an accurate assessment," Schneizel acknowledged, and Lelouch was surprised that he'd cede even that much of a victory. Despite his extraordinary talents, Schneizel perhaps had never been as proud. Maybe he has no wounds worth protecting? "I don't mind retreating, in order to find a better move later. I told myself this sort of cold logic was an advantage, but the passionate determination I thought would be your downfall instead allowed you the freedom to make moves I would never risk."
"That's why I challenged you today, Lelouch, because this was a game I didn't know if I could win."
Lelouch stared at him in surprise. "You...wanted to change."
"A stagnant world has already been rejected, so it would be pointless to cling to a defeated idea, wouldn't it? Yet, even though I came here with that logic, even though we played with stakes, your will to risk everything—because victory is worth so much to you—is still missing from my own strategies."
Lelouch tensed, as his mind refocused on the most important point in all of this. "You promised you would tell me how you knew, Schneizel!"
"Yes, I did."
He took out his phone, and for a moment, Lelouch thought he was going to call in accomplices to help cart Lelouch off. Instead, he only played back several recorded audio files. They were all of Suzaku talking.
"That's what Le—what I thought. Forget what I just said."
"I need you to help me sneak Lelou—I mean, rearrange the guards. For security reasons. Only remember your orders from this conversation."
"I don't want to help Lelouch sneak onto the Damocles either, C.C., but...oh, crap, Schneizel's still on the line." There was the loud rustling sound, as if someone had made a sudden grab for the phone. "Um, forget whatever you just heard."
By that point, Lelouch was looking at Schneizel through his fingers, too annoyed and embarrassed to face the man head on. "I told him. I told him and told him not to use my real name. I'm practically sick with how many times I repeated myself."
"He's an impulsive person. Why trust someone like this to keep your survival secret in the first place?"
"I hadn't intended to survive at all!" he defended, somehow unwilling to be judged a fool by this opponent, in particular.
"I see. I had wondered why you would risk such a thing, when it endangers the very plan you struggled so hard to complete."
"We both know what the logical course of action is, but I unexpectedly survived my perfectly planned assassination, thanks to an accident and an interfering witch." He snorted. "You're welcome to try explaining to Nunnally and Zero why I need to die after all, Schneizel—because my own arguments have gained me no traction on this point."
"...No, I doubt they would accept such cold logic, no matter the provenance."
"Yes, they think differently, or at least it seems so, most of the time." He paused, wondering if he should bother explaining himself any further when he knew Schneizel would never share his views, before coming to a decision. Even if he won't agree, I'm not ashamed of the convictions that led me here. It was so rare that Lelouch got the chance to be honest with someone who had some hope of matching his reasoning abilities.
"Even though we are used to calculating everything out, sometimes, the number of possibilities is simply too great, even for us. At those times, Schneizel, perhaps you simply want to retreat, until the potential outcomes become more clear, but there is another way. I have chosen to take those leaps of faith: to believe that if I'm willing to risk it all, I can obtain the future I want."
"Yet, that is also the quickest path to defeat," Schneizel pointed out.
"Yes, that's true, as well." I have certainly tasted the bitterness of my own failures. "But a kind world requires leaps of faith, Schneizel, because who has ever lived without knowing any pain, without ever being hurt or disappointed or betrayed? At any given moment, it is always safer to lock your doors and close your heart, and yet if everyone does that, it only leads to the cruelest of worlds. People must place their trust in each other, not because it's what their logic tells them would be best in any given moment, but in defiance of their present caution, for the sake of the world they want to create."
"I see. Because I only wish to take the sure path, I have ended up losing everything I fought for." The sadness was back in his eyes again.
Lelouch frowned, not wanting to be manipulated by what were probably feigned emotions, but curious despite himself. "Schneizel, tell me, what exactly is it that you would have asked for, if you had won?"
In response, Schneizel played one more recording. As it ended, Lelouch found himself staring at the other man with something uncomfortably close to pity. Even if we'll always think differently, this is something I can understand.
"Since I destroyed Pendragon with F.L.I.E.J.A. and then launched the failed plan with the Damocles, there is only one person who has remained loyal to me. I thought these stakes would be enough, but it seems that not even this could change my way of thinking sufficiently."
Lelouch closed his eyes, pained, remembering how he'd focused on looking outwardly calm and assured as he made his live broadcast from the Damocles, declaring dominion over the whole world, and hopefully halting any remaining resistance from the Black Knights. Inside, he'd just been desperate to finish quickly so that he could turn his phone back on. The Lancelot Albion's IFF transponder had been down for a long time by that point, with no news from Suzaku.
After the announcement, Lelouch hadn't been able to stop pacing until the phone call had finally, finally come in from his Knight, although when Suzaku had confessed he needed "help" reaching the shuttle he was supposed to discreetly sneak away in, Lelouch had become frightened that the intended lie, that the Knight of Zero had been killed in action, might actually become reality.
There was so much blood.
Staring at the still form he'd found slumped against a wall, the remains of Suzaku's shrapnel sliced uniform deeply charred by a too close explosion, Lelouch had thought, for one terrifying moment, that he'd finally succeeded in killing the last friend he had left. The next moment, Suzaku had breathed and opened his eyes, and the blind horror of being at once so guilty and so utterly alone had receded behind commands and bandages and desperation, the terror gone but never entirely forgotten.
I understand why you would risk Zero's wrath, Schneizel, by coming after me.
"This isn't the sort of thing you needed to win a chess match for." It was so easy to become trapped in thinking of all the ways that you could hurt me, but I should have seen that no matter how controlled you appear outwardly, there must still be things that you care about—and ways in which you can be hurt, yourself.
"If not a chess match, then what is it I needed to win, Lelouch?"
"Winning isn't the point. Whether it ends in success or failure, Schneizel, your intent to change still has meaning, doesn't it? Besides which, the whole point of this new world is that it should be kinder for everyone." He shook his head. "I'm sure Zero never meant to say such a thing to you, in the first place."