John practically ran out of his classroom, he had gotten a text from Clara saying she had a surprise for him. He ran down the flight of stairs almost knocking Professor Song down the stairs; he paused to apologize to her but he noticed that she had tears in her eyes; He stopped her with an arm on her shoulder.
"River…Are you okay."
She shrugged his hand off and tried to continue walking up the steps, he stopped her again this time by running halfway up the stairs and blocked her path. "River, just talk to me what is wrong?"
Clara stood outside of the University, leaning on her new moped that he father got for her birthday that was on its way, it had two helmets so she thought John and her could go for a ride. Some cat calls and whistles made her blush all the university boys were staring as she waited, her legs draped over the handlebar of her moped. The sun shined off of her bare legs and she had chose to wear jean shorts instead the motorcycle pants her father insisted she wore while riding the moped. She rolled her eyes at the memory of him holding out the keys and the hideous pants. She glanced at her watch and noticed that the ten minutes that he claimed to be there in had came and went.
She pulled out her cell phone and noticed that she had text telling her he'd be a little bit later than he expected, she sighed and put her headphones in and waited. John sat in an empty classroom with River crying into his shoulder.
"So are you going to tell me what is wrong?"
She pulled away from him and gave a small smile. "You know, I'm sorry I never appreciated you. I see the way you are with Clara, and I remember how amazing you were." He shifted uncomfortably to sit back on the desk behind him. "But I fucked up and I see that now."
"Look River-"
"John let me finish, I'm sorry…I'm so sorry." She began sobbing again and he then knew that this was much more serious than he wanting to get back with him. "River, please talk to me." She wiped the tears from her eyes and held onto his hand, she smiled serenely and a tear fell from her eye.
"I'm dying."
Clara sighed dramatically but perked when she spotted John walking down the University steps, he quickly gave her a kiss on the forehead when he reached her but his smile didn't reach his eyes, Clara noticed but pointed to her moped. "Wanna go for a ride?"
He grinned and pulled her into a hug. "For your birthday I assume?" She nodded against his chest but she paused when she had noticed he smelled of women's perfume. "You wear perfume now?"
He let out a breath that he had been holding and rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly. "Well no, I just gave one of my co-workers a hug she was having a bad day." Clara nodded but couldn't shake the feeling that he wasn't telling her the whole truth; she smirked and swung her legs over the seat. "So, get on clever boy."
He made a grimace and rubbed his hands together. "You see when you texted me at first I was not very busy and then it seems like, BOOM, everything came out of the wood work. I would love to go but I have a ton of work that I need to finish." She smiled; she understood he had a busier job now that he was in 'the big leagues.' She kissed his so he would stop rambling about how no one here appreciated his civil war puppets.
"I understand honey, I'll just ride over to Tiffany's. But I'll see you later, yeah?" He nodded fiercely and pulled her slowly into a kiss, she felt him kiss her with his whole body. She rolled against him and moaned into his mouth but as quickly as it started he pulled away and patted her on the head.
"I'll talk to you later sweetheart." He ran back up the stairs and out of her sight, she sighed and strapped her helmet to her head.
She was fine when he had cancelled some time later that night but when he cancelled every single day that week she became irate and saddened, she now sat outside of her school when he pulled up while a sheepish smile. "Sorry I'm late, I got held up." She frowned and slid into his passenger seat while slamming the door. He flinched and tried to hold onto her hand as he pulled away but she began messing with her hair. He sighed. "Is something wrong Clara?"
She looked at him feigning innocence. "No, why would anything be wrong."
He knew that tone, it was the one she would get if there was some sort of mystery that he needed to solve, so he sat a the red light and racked his brain for anything that could be wrong. And like a big needle in his side he froze, he wasn't telling her why he had been staying late at work. He licked his lips slowly.
"Are you mad that I've been staying late at work?"
Clara crossed her arms. "No."
"Clara please... don't be upset at me I'm just swamped at work." He pulled up to her driveway; her father was already in the doorway waiting for her to get in the door. Clara sighed rather loudly before grabbing the handle to the door, John grabbed her other hand with a frown on his face. "Clara I'm sorry, it'll calm down soon I promise."
She nodded solemnly before kissing him gently on the lips. "Just don't forget about me okay?" He nodded before watching her walk slowly to her father who glared in his direction, flipped him off and closed the door behind him. He hung his head let it rest against the steering wheel, he knew that he should be careful about spending as much time with her but his heart clenched when he thought of the woman who was now shacked up in his house…dying slowly.
He now sat in his driveway, afraid, Mostly because of what Clara said. "Don't forget, how could I." He sighed and switched the car off and headed inside. River was lying on the couch, wrapped in blankets and the TV blaring. He wanted to yell, he wanted to kick her out, he just wanted his ghost to be gone but his ached when he looked at her. He couldn't lie to himself, he still loved her in a way but he knew that they were finished; plus he only wanted Clara.
So instead of yelling he sat next to her on the couch, his hand buried in his hair and his head lolled back in pure exasperation.
"What am I going to do?" He whispered lightly to himself.
Clara spent all night contemplating on what she should do next, she was beyond irate and now she was becoming worried that he was changing his mind about being with her. So she decided to drive to his house late that night, she smiled when she saw all his lights were on. She had called while sitting outside on her moped but had no answer, so she slid off and knocked on the door.
Still no answer.
She sighed, maybe she should just go home and ignore the nagging feeling that was eating away at her nerves. She was scared. Clara just wanted her Doctor back and she would do anything to get him back to normal, so she turned the nob and smiled triumphantly when it moved without hesitation.
She stepped inside and called out his name.
"John? I know you might be busy but I needed to speak with yo-"
River's hair was visible but she was facing away from her, but the position looked terrible as she noticed from behind her form was John sitting on the couch. John stood up suddenly, his face surprised his girlfriend was now standing in his house.
"Clara, what are doing here?"
Clara scoffed, she just caught John kissing River and he had the nerve to change the subject. But what Clara didn't know was that she had seen it all wrong, River's big hair made it look like they were face to face but she was only leaning over him as she tended to his nose bleed which she inadvertently caused by stressing him out.
"So this is what you've been up to? Screw your ex?" John gave a confused eyebrow then realized the way River was bent over him. He stammered and flailed his arm. "No no no, this is not what it seems like. You see I got a nosebleed. Happens when I'm stressed sometimes and then River noticed it and decided to take care of it but she was doing it all wrong-"
"John just shut up, so you're telling me that you were kissing or haven't been kissing?"
He laughed and tried to move closer to Clara who stepped back in the process. "No sweetheart, I would never do that. River tell her."
River nodded but Clara wasn't listening to any of it, she just wanted to get out of there. So she stormed out of the house in tears. John watched as she left, he was glued to the ground but turned back to River.
"I'll call her tomorrow."
"Sweetie, you might want to talk to her now." He shook his head and threw himself back into the couch. "No she needs to cool down." River gave a small smile but it faltered as she swayed slightly, John gave her a concerned look and watched as she fell to the floor.
"River. River!?"
He shook her lightly but she wasn't responding.
Clara made it back home and she wanted to scream. How could she be so dumb as to believe such a great man wouldn't end up a cheater? She locked herself into her bedroom and cried, she wasn't good enough. Why did she ever think that she could be enough for him, she was barely nineteen, what could he possibly want with her.
Her phone rang and she noticed that it said John. She ignored it. All ten calls from him until he finally stopped, she sighed and turned off her light to go to sleep, but her phone rang again but this time the number was unknown. She sighed. "Yes John."
"Actually no, this is John's mother…. John is in the hospital and he needs you there." Clara shot up and more tears fell. "What is he alright?!"
Idris sighed. "No, just please come down here, I know its late but if you love him. Please, he needs your help."
Without a second thought she was now standing outside of the room John was in, but she stepped inside she noticed that he wasn't the patient, River was. Clara stood behind him and he sighed.
"I've been taking care of her…not sleeping with her. She's dying Clara and…I couldn't let her die alone."
Clara instantly felt terrible but she felt even worse when she noticed how lost he looked, so she did the only thing she could at the moment. She found him. With a hand she grabbed tightly on to his own and rubbed circle of comfort to remind him of his way back home. And when he looked up into her eyes, she knew at that moment that she was his home. His beacon, and when a sob left his lips she kissed the op of his head and pulled a chair up beside him as they sat and waited for River to wake up.
When she did briefly, John was by her side. Stroking her hair and his tears dropping onto her bed. River smiled and touched his cheek. "She'll take care of you, I love you sweetie. I always will."
"I hate goodbyes." She smiled at John. "Then make it seem like I'll see you again." The machines beeped all around them. A tear rolled down her eyes and Clara ran into the hallway to get help. John stroked her face and smiled. "See you around Professor Song."
"Till next time Doctor-." The machines whirled and screamed, she faded and John fell back into his chair. Clara returned with the nurse but it was too late, John turned to her; his eyes filled with unshed tears. She pulled him into a tight hug. His hands buried themselves into her hair and he cried. Sad that River was gone but also relieved that Clara was beside him.
"Oh my Clara…My beautiful Clara." She held him and he knew that he was home, he was safe and he was loved. They ushered the both of them out of the room but all John could feel was the softness of her skin against his own, and right now that's all that he needed.