A.N: As some of you may have noticed, I have uploaded a cover photo for this story and this is the background: Nope, it is not a creation by me. Instead it is a photo I found when I googled something to do with Kyon and wrestling or whatever and I found a few photos someone posted of a created wrestler version of Kyon. I thought it looked decent enough, although the gimmick of 100% Muscle Kyon seemed to be OOC for him since, well, him having an ego only leads to getting his ass handed to him in some way. I did like one of his wrestling attires and the suit-up attire he had minus the bunny ears (likely Haruhi's work if any), the latter of which I made the cover pic.

I do play some wrestling games (not often considering school work and better games out there) but I don't think I'd ever have the patience to create a custom version of any of the SOS Brigade members. My complexes would not allow it to be less than accurate, not perfect.

Anywho enough of that dribble, enjoy the show!

Ps: The poll on my page is still active for the time being until the next chapter, so don't forget to vote!

Disclaimer: Along with TMOHS franchise, I also don't own the cover picture provided. Why can't I be the beacon of a massive franchise?...Soon…

/

Chapter 13: Being Weird

….Or maybe I will cough out in agony.

I gripped my sore rib cage, launching myself off of the satin pillow (Why didn't I get satin?) and unto my ribs. I could hear, who I believed to be, Tsuruya laughing next to my ear, which I would've attended to if my hands weren't so focused on my sore ribs.

''You have quite the nerve to sleep in my bed, Kyon. What did you think you were trying to get?''

If Tsuruya was right next to me and I'm on Haruhi's bed, then they both must be…How long were they here?

''Really? That's the first question you ask me after violating my bed sheets with your presence?! This is the reason why I had you sleep under me, Kyon!

I was hoping my Chieftian aura would motivate you to be a better Brigade member. Obviously, it's needed!''

I don't think it's Chieftian, but whatever. And what else could I do? You were all sleeping in front of my bed? I opened my eyes ever so slightly, slowly noticing the ever-so-mighty boss, crossing her arms above me. I've had to be almost face-to-face with her when I was groaning in pain.

I looked around to notice two other odd sights I never thought I would ever be in the presence of in this situation: Asahina was lying next to me to my left, Tsuruya on my right; barely able to hold her laugh and trying to give me a death stare, and Haruhi above me…on top of a bunk bed…in the morning…if I was any other guy, I would consider myself the luckiest man on the planet!

But I know an attempted guilt trip from Haruhi when I see it. I'm on a battle of three fronts!

''That's no excuse for sleeping in your Chief's bed, idiot! How do you think any of the other girls would feel if you slept on their beds?''

I already know what would happen: Asahina would whimper in fear while Tsuruya would give me a much worse punch, either way. Not that I told her this, then again maybe I should've.

I cocked my eyebrow, hoping to look smooth, sarcastic. ''Barred from their slumber like I was?'' I was honest. Just not Haruhi honest. Her morning anger intensified for a moment, shutting her eyes to yell at me. I'm a smartass; comes with the muscles I suppose.

''Alright, Baka! For that, you get a penalty!'' Penalty? Tsuruya is paying for everything! What can you force me to do?

She gave a toothy grin that stunk of secrets. Only the Cheshire cat could mischiefly grin better. She turned around for a moment to look outside the window and slowly turned her head back to me.

''Well, Mikuru does need supplies and we are in a new place. We're gonna need someone to carry all of our stuff.''

She pointed directly at my nose in judgment. ''But for this, you are carrying all of our things while we go through the mall! Don't you dare drop a thing, otherwise double penalty! And you. Don't. want. That. Kyon.''

I can see why Asahina would need supplies for making more costumes but why would we need to go shopping? We barely have enough room for everything up here to begin with. Where do you plan on putting anything if we have too much?

It's too early for this.

I sighed and gave her a nod. I don't have the patience or care to continue this argument without any breakfast.

Her Cheshire grin transitioned into a small smile. ''Good, now get off of my bed before I kick you off!''

Somehow I had to call upon all of my yoga powers to maneuver my way below Haruhi to get to the ladder at the base of the bed. She wasn't moving and moving to the sides would mean an awkward stare from either of the girls. Not risking that. I shimmied myself slower and slower as not to fall off the bed and not to face Haruhi's face or…well…all I have to say is thankfully she was wearing pants.

That part was the most harrowing. If I blushed, the girls would notice and I would be dead. If morning wood began a few metres earlier, I'm sure a Closed Space would open up inside this RV. Mental willpower and my strife to not suffer any further pain powered me through…up until I needed to sneeze…at the wrong place…at the wrong time…in the wrong position.

Oh crap…

I heard Haruhi whimper, vaguely seeing her blushing. I had no time to look at either of the other girls. I only had one thing in mind: Get off this floor.

Screw subtlety. I slipped through between Haruhi's arch and leapt off the bed and unto my feet. I took a bundle of clothing on the floor that I had in my bag and ran downstairs. I know for sure I had no point in going back upstairs anytime soon. This was perfectly sure with what I thought I could hear was a silent scream breach my inner thoughts.

I notice downstairs that Koizumi was asleep on the couch, his ear buds still in his ears and Nagato was still reading away; seemingly unphased by the scream. It had to be silent.

I sighed. Sighing because I knew what this means now: She haunts my waking consciousness too.

/

It's a good thing Nagato drove us to a mall for a few reasons, the main one I will forever consider a saintly joy was that it had a few diners inside. I took a shower in the RV in what felt like nanoseconds, got dressed in that somewhat cozy, somewhat cramped bathroom in microseconds, and dashed out before Haruhi could track me down and do her thing.

Someone out there had to hate me or maybe I did something in a past life like stomp a butterfly or farmed a bad crop one day. If that were the case, I'd love to track them down and shove their face to the dirt for causing fate to say, 'Hey, wanna make Kyon's life even more awkward?'

I only had so much money with me so I bought a few bentos and some green tea to boost my mood. I may need the mental reflexes to come up with a really good way to get out of that position.

''Kid, is that you?''

I turned my head around, hoping it wasn't who I thought it was. Then again, I don't know anyone who refers to me as kid.

''Vance, You're here too?''

Vance, the hulking brute, walked up to my table with a large tray of food. It made anything I had been eating to Taniguchi's horror look like cub food. I had at least counted 8 steaks on his tray with a moderately sized salad.

''Course I am. I have a show here tonight too. Where are your friends?'' He looked curiously at me, sitting alone on a four person table.

I told him that I needed to get some time for myself; there was no way I was gonna tell him about what happened earlier. He smirked.

''Traveling with three girls will want you to do that.''

''Four.'' I corrected him.

''Good luck. Do you mind if I sit here?''

I let him know that everyone was still in the RV so he was free to sit across from me.

''An RV? Not a bad way to start. When I first started in the business, I had to travel with three buddies of mine in a cramped little car. It's good for someone your height, but I need accommodation.

Took me two years before I decided to say, ''Enough, I need a car for me,'' so first time I started working for a big promotion, I bought an electric truck.'' He looked slightly embarrassed when he said electric but I paid no mind to it. I won't snub my nose at someone who likes clean air and leg room.

''Eventually, I got so big in this industry that I started traveling to and from some shows in a limo until I decided to humble up and get myself something like what you guys got. Mine's parked in front of the coffee shop not far from here.''

You started traveling in a limo? I've been in enough to know it only meant I was going to found out something odd or I was going to go somewhere odd. I don't think I'll ever feel that same way.

''Such is the life of a popular heel faction. You do know what a faction is, right?''

I shook my head. He didn't seem impressed with my lack of wrestling know-how.

''It's a group. Your….SOS Brigade? Yeah, that's a faction or a stable, either way you're a group.''

''Okay, sorry.''

He waved his hand in between bites. ''Don't worry, kid. You're learning. Speaking of learning, ready for your match tonight?''

I knew we were going to be on the show, I just didn't know who we were gonna be against.

''Your Mother Hen really doesn't tell you anything, does she? I'm sure the head promoter told her the matches for the show. I don't know what your girlfriends are doing but I know you and Koizumi are facing me and, hopefully, a sober Keiichi. It's a title re-match and, spoiler, you two are still the good guys.''

So much for that surprise later tonight. Keiichi still isn't cleaned up?

He shook his head; sticking his fork on one of his morsels. ''I doubt it. After our last match, the trainers were not impressed with his behavior. He's losing face with the higher-ups and he's losing face within the company. The guy needs serious help and he's not getting it. It frustrates me.

I was travelling with the guy a few months before you guys came to the picture and I was helping him and it was going good. The guys decided to make this into a story about how Keiichi would rise from the ashes and get back into the spotlight but when we won the titles…'' He snapped his fingers aloft and pointed his finger in the opposite direction, ''…back he goes into the bar, drinking with the guys and flirting with the girls.''

I can see why that could've been considered an inspirational tale spun out for some Oscar winning movie about generic guy goes out to win in insurmountable odds but this was real life. What kind of people would turn that into a story with real people?

I sipped some tea before I gave a reply. ''So you stopped traveling with him because he relapsed?''

He shook his head slightly. ''He stopped traveling with me because I was a 'downer' on his revelries.''

That would best describe me if Taniguchi wanted to start wrestling, or Kunikada would be. Regardless, it's a shame to see someone doing so good and going back to the demons.

''It's his own fault. He has a lot of demons. If he doesn't fix himself soon, he never will.''

That would normally sound pessimistic but how long has he been looking after him not just as a team but before that? I don't think he should just leave him be. I can't give that input; I don't know how long he's known him; how long he's had to deal with him. You can only do so much for someone who's not willing to help himself.

He finished his final morsel of steak and wiped his mouth clean of any stain in a very British manner, might I add. That narrows down the western side of his genetics, seemingly.

''Anyways, I just wanted to let ya know that ya may have another handicap match. Terrible for the crowd, but expect it.'' He looked over my shoulder, his eyes widening. ''Gonna give you a heads-up, your friends just entered the mall, and your Mother Hen with the ribbon? I think she's looking for ya. I'll leave you to that.''

Thanks for the warning, Vance. I scarfed the rest of my tea and tried to eat the rest of the final bento before the Brigade came for me. I think he bowed to me and left slowly but I was too focused on finishing my food and anticipating what Haruhi plans on doing to me. I'm getting a double penalty for sure!

''There you are!'' My intrepid leader declared, charging at me along with the rest of the group, Nagato trailing behind. Expecting a punch, I sped through the last of the bento before she finally arrived. Last meal was finished; I'm ready for the Squad.

She put her fists on her sides; bending in my direction. ''Don't you think you can get out of your penalty by running off. You have a duty, mister!''

Wouldn't dream of it.

/

We all sat down at a diner that had spots for six seats and we each had to draw straws. Whoever had the three short ones were in one group and the ones with the three large ones were in another. Asahina went first. She calmly and slowly plucked a short one.

Tsuruya went after and as swift as thunder, she took out another short one. A smile that could challenge Haruhi's revealed itself from her face.

''We're together again, Mikuru!'' She brought her hand up to which Asahina looked at her hand, trying to remember what she was supposed to do with this gesture.

''It's a high five, you need to touch her palm with yours.'' I whispered to her. She nodded and gave Tsuruya her high five. I guess Asahina will have some familiar ground for today.

Koizumi and Nagato both took large ones until finally I was last. It seemed evident that me and Haruhi would not be in the same group for whatever we were gonna be doing but after earlier, I didn't mind having to not defend myself. It could give me time to think of a way to get out of it.

I took the straw closest to her index finger, slightly crossing it with my pinky. It was softer than usual. I took out a short one. Oh boy…

''Looks like we have Kyon for the next little while!'' Tsuruya declared with that same smile and Asahina looking at me with a smile. Haruhi, on the other hand, seemed like she lost her toy for the day, and I mean that literally.

''Just because you're not in my group doesn't mean you get off easy. Whatever the girls want to buy, you are carrying until we go back to the RV! That is your penalty.'' She spoke with her arms crossed after finishing her drink.

It was decided that Team Megas (Me, Tsuruya, and Asahina) were to go shopping for materials for Asahina's costumes while Tsuruya just wanted to get new clothes. We also had the extra task to track down any strange goings. Seen that coming. On Team Suzumiya (Haruhi, Koizumi, and Nagato) they were going to venture around the mall to find souvenirs and track down the paranormal. Could you make it any more obvious about your ego?

''Oh and Tsuruya, if Kyon ever goes out of line you have my permission to whip him in public.

Everyone, we meet back here at 2:00 pm sharp. Don't be late!'' She has a whip!?

''Don't worry, Kyon. We'll take good care of you, right Mikuru?'' She looked back at her nodding friend before we decided to go out and shop. I don't think I've ever been around Tsuruya long enough to know if she was being sincere but I can't imagine she would be nearly as relentless as Haruhi.

The mall here wasn't as big as the one we were used to back home but it still had its assortment of shops and clothing places. There was nothing here that interested me in terms of clothing but then again I had enough to comfort me for the time being. Regardless, I still bought an outfit or two just to make sure I had something from this place. It would be good to say I have something from this place or that place just for the whole memory thing.

Ahhh Metaphysics, it's what stops me from thinking about having to carry all of the girl's bags which, by the way, number at 4 each right now, including my own! Did you plan on accommodating the entire roster?!

''Don't talk like that, Kyon. You remember what she told me I could do to you if you got out of hand.'' Tsuruya spoke with a smile and a sing-song voice, doing a good job at hiding the sinister entails of that sentence. Wink at me, I don't care. I'm not Kunikada.

Eventually, we found ourselves in one last store which had to be either Tsuruya's choice or Haruhi's.

''Alright, Kyon. We only have one last stop and we're done, but we won't be here for too long…''

Oh thank-you!

''…as long as I have everything on Haruhi's note.'' It figured Haruhi would be behind having me go inside a lingerie shop with the longest note in existence for such products.

''Let's see, Miss Nagato wants…'' And around this time, I started to go into a state of sensory deprivation because I really don't need this today. This was Haruhi's doing, wasn't it? Damn my gender, damn my society, and damn my behavior!

After what felt like eons having to look up at the ceiling to avoid seeing what the girls were buying for each other and everyone else as well as gawking customers either laughing at me for carrying their bags or laughing at me for reacting so immaturely (as if you people would understand if you weren't in my shoes) I heard a small declaration of resistance come from Asahina.

''But, I didn't write that down.''

''Oh come on, Mikuru. Me and Haruh-nyan both agree you'd look hot in this.''

''I don't know, I don't wear things like this.''

''Just try it on and see how it feels. I bet you'll change your mind so fast when you look in the mirror and see yourself.''

''O-okay.''

My imagination was processing on the very idea of what to expect from those two and what they want Asahina to wear. Frankly, I didn't want to know. The very idea that Asahina in front of me in a stunning piece of lingerie….shut up, brain!

''Oh, Kyooooon.'' I turned to my left to see Tsuruya looking straight at me with another bag, held gently by her two fingers. Thine wish is my command, I suppose.

I took the light bag in the one finger on my right hand that had any blood circulation left and placed it there.

''Ya know, we could sit down if you want. There are a few chairs right next to the changing rooms.'' Tsuruya pointed at two distinct chairs right next to the hallway for the rooms. Seemed like a voyeuristic fallacy but I've stood up long enough.

''Wouldn't hurt.'' I responded as she started skipping slightly to the farthest chair from the hall, meaning I'll be on the closest end. Is this some form of a trap?

''It's kind of rude that you kept looking at the ceiling the entire time. You don't have to be so shy.''

Tsuruya? You too think I'm rude? Believe me, if it were any other day at any other time I wouldn't be this shy.

''From what I saw this morning, being shy should be the last thing you could be doing. No point in being that way. That's why I like what Haruh-nyan's doing for Mikuru.

I've known her for about a year and in that time she's so shy. She wouldn't talk to anybody if they didn't talk first. I remember one time, we were having lunch and some guy who had to be the biggest douchebag I've ever known tried to hook up with her while we were eating. He didn't have the decency to look in her eyes either.'' She punched her palm in a menacing stance.

''She whimpered and looked down, she wanted to run. I wanted to flatten the guy but she wouldn't like that, didn't want the attention. He wouldn't leave her alone until I threatened him to go fly off.''

With the way she was talking, maybe she should have been wrestling Shaku instead. ''The point is Haruh-nyan is helping her get out of her shell. The Mikuru you know is much different than the one I did; going around in Bunny and Maid costumes, going inside a lingerie store with a guy! Maybe one day she will gain the confidence to clobber a guy who looks at her down low like I had to two weekends ago!''

I do remember one guy in my class having a black eye. I think he said that he fell down and hit a door. That story was doomed to fail.

''And even without Mikuru's involvement, I would've loved to know guys like you were running around. You're so different from the usual folks I see! Making movies, looking for the paranormal, it's so weird.

But weird is good! I was called that all through school and I see it more as a compliment now; an honorific! Being weird means you're not meant to be a sheep, you gotta be a flying lamb with two swords in hands and a jetpack…with the heart of a hawk! It took me a while to realize you weren't a sheep either or Kuni. You all just seemed so normal but then I heard about you doing all these things from Mikuru and hearing what Kuni was talking about Multiverse theory, it was so cool!

All those other people; the douchebags, the barbies, whatever. They can be sheep but you guys are flying lambs and investing in flying lambs sounds way cooler than investing in sheep, don't ya think?''

Wow, maybe there was more to her being here than just Haruhi telling her to do it. She saw us as kindred spirits who were given a choice of going down two paths and instead we flew to the skies and went to space. I don't think I would've put it the way she did, grouping everyone together like Haruhi would but she was right…..heart of a hawk….huh.

Suddenly, Tsuruya's phone went off, making a large beeping noise that echoed across the entire shop.

''Sorry about that!'' She waved at everyone, that smile never leaving her animated posture. ''It's Mikuru, she's coming out of the stall now!'' She spoke with her eyes closed.

I looked towards the hallway and noticed the door was opening, and I could've sworn I saw a feint light poke out in the little bit of the inside of the stall I could see. Maybe it was just my imagination.

Tsuruya jumped out of her chair and ran to see her while I just did what I did best and looked at the ceiling.

''You are gorgeous! Oh my, you look like an Aphrodittie. Kyon, you gotta come see this!''

''No! It's too revealing.''

''Don't be so modest, Kyon!''

Just gonna count tiles on the ceiling, no big wh…oooa!

/

The next thing I know, I'm waking up by a very strong odor at a…a gym? Why are we at a gym? I looked down to see that my clothes had changed to my athletic clothes and the only people around me were Asahina, Tsuruya, and Nagato. The first two were smiling in delight that I was okay and I know Nagato was too in her own special way.

Nagato was knelt before me with something in her hand that looked like smelling salts. ''He is alright. Do you have any drowsiness?''

Yeah, I got one question I would love answered. ''Who changed my clothes!?''

''I was told by Haruhi Suzumiya to never disclose that information to you upon your revival. I was told to revive you and train you for your upcoming match tonight along with Mikuru Asahina and Itsuki Koizumi.'' You don't need to, I think that question answered itself.

I stood myself back up, in pure wonder about how I got here and what happened. Tsuruya started laughing.

''Geez, I grabbed you to go see Mikuru and I think I pulled you a little too hard and smashed your head against the wall. Sorry 'bout that!'' She scratched her head, which was in a ponytail and a headband, nervously. I didn't feel any headaches, so all was forgiven.

''I'm glad you're alright, Kyon. I'll make you some tea after your fight tonight?'' Oh Miss Asahina, I could hug you right now, my angel!

''Where is Haruhi and Koizumi?'' The girls were about to respond but Nagato took over.

''They are currently within the gym, exercising and preparing. We are in the boxing-wrestling part of the gym and by Haruhi Suzumiya's orders, you are meant to prepare for our match as soon as you awoken. Are you ready and rested?''

I wouldn't say rested, but I will be fine.

Asahina and Tsuruya took a place somewhere else within the room where Tsuruya was teaching Asahina some form of martial arts technique. It seemed a little too hazy with Mikuru trying to replicate the move I could barely see.

''Kyon, in accordance to your wishes we will be going through the first intermediate wrestling training program. Are you ready?''

I smirked; knowing Koizumi hadn't even started this program yet instead he just wanted to cater to the audience and the Brigade.

''I was born ready.''

/

A.N: Sorry for the wait but March is hectic. Any who we will have two matches in the next chapter, which seems overdue considering a wrestling-based story doesn't have much to do with wrestling in it.

As always, review, give constructive critique, I always enjoys some decent mature feedback!

With that said, the poll will close when the next chapter is released so with that said,

Good night and good luck.