Part 12

Adam could barely open his eyes; they were so heavy that he struggled to keep to keep them open. He looked down to his left and saw a woman's bowed head resting on small, white hands clasped in prayer. He was puzzled at first and then he realized that it was Lucy, that she was kneeling and praying by his bedside. He wanted to speak to her, to touch her hair and to thank her but he felt too weary and overwhelmingly sleepy. His eyes closed and he fell asleep knowing that Lucy was there and that she cared for him still.

Lucy walked downstairs and Ben stood up. "Thank you, Mr. Cartwright, for letting me see him." Lucy picked her gloves from off the table and began to put them on.

"Now, Lucy," Ben said, "stay for a while and have some coffee or tea. It's too cold out there for you-you shouldn't have driven all the way out here."

"When I heard what had happened, I wanted to see him. I had said some unkind things to him the last time we spoke-and I didn't mean them." Her voice broke and she took a deep breath, Madame Millais' earlier advice ringing in her ears when Lucy became upset at the news about Adam, "Breathe, just breathe, ma chere."

"I wanted to apologize to him," Lucy said. She stopped, trying again to control her fear. Adam had looked so pale and his breathing was so rough that she half believed what Mrs. McHale had told her in the shop, that Adam Cartwright had a near-fatal lumber accident, a tree fell on him, and that he was dying.

When Mrs. McHale had said that, just nonchalantly, Lucy felt dizzy-she felt light-headed and had to sit down. Mrs. McHale had called to Madame Millais who came from the back, and when she saw Lucy's paleness, the whiteness of even her lips, she told Lucy to drop her head and to breathe and then she ran to get a glass of cool water.

"Drink, ma chere, it will do you good. Now what is it that made you go so pale? It is not your parents, no?" Madame Millais kneeled next to Lucy's chair.

"I was just asking Miss Lucy if she had heard about Adam Cartwright," Mrs. McHale said. "Everyone is talking about it. It seems he was almost killed and still might die. Well, she went white and I thought she was about to faint and that's when I called you." Mrs. McHale was flustered but at least she had the satisfaction of discovering new gossip. Just wait until she told everyone that Lucy Fairmont had practically fainted at the news that Adam Cartwright was close to dying. After all, Lucy Fairmont had ended two engagements with two eligible bachelors, one of whom left Virginia City immediately after Lucy broke off with him. And then she had moved out of her parents' elegant home, turned her back on all they offered her just so she could earn her own way. And now Lucy Fairmont had shown her hand; there was definitely something between her and Adam Cartwright. Mrs. McHale and her friends could spend many a lovely time recounting past incidents or events involving Lucy and Adam that would support this conclusion and fuel even more gossip.

"Mrs. McHale," Madame Millais said, smiling, "pick out any hat you would like. You may then have twenty per cent off for being so kind. I think Lucy does not feel well so I will return in a moment." And with Mrs. McHale looking at the prices of all the hats she had tried on to see which one cost the most, Madame took Lucy to the back and guided her to a seat.

Lucy let herself be led; she couldn't think what to do. Adam might be dying and here she was in town, selling hats to vain, fat women. "I need to see him, Madame," Lucy said. That was all she knew to do; to go see him.

"D'accord, ma petite. Just breathe. Just breathe slowly." Lucy did as Madame told her. "Now, listen to me. I have my carriage at the livery-breathe…just breathe-and you tell the man that I say you may take it."

"Thank you," Lucy said as she stood up. Now she knew what she would do; she would go see Adam and tell him that she was sorry for what she had said. She didn't want him out of her life-there was no life without him. It couldn't be too late; the fates wouldn't be that cruel. And when she arrived at the Ponderosa, Ben showed her upstairs and then closed the door to leave her alone with him. All she could think to do was to drop to her knees and plead with God to spare him. And then, she rose and looked down at him, brushed the stray hair from his forehead and bent and kissed his brow.

"Please, Adam," she quietly said, "if you can hear me, know that I didn't mean what I said. I didn't mean it and I'm sorry if I hurt you. I do love you-my heart is fixed on you and I have no room for anyone else, no other man but you." Then she turned and went downstairs where Ben was waiting for he; he hoped that perhaps Adam had spoken to her-said something.

"Are you sure you won't stay? Just some coffee to warm you up?"

Lucy slipped on her leather gloves. She felt that Ben wanted some company but knew, with the long ride back to town that she couldn't stay any longer. "No, Mr. Cartwright, I really can't stay. I need to return to work. Madame Millais let me have the afternoon to come see Adam but…I really need to get back."

"All right, Lucy," Ben said, "Let me help you with your cape." Ben held her cape and then wrapped it around her and she reached up and buttoned it at the neck. "Let me walk you out." Ben put his hand on the small of her back and guided her out. He helped her into the small buggy.

"May I come see him again?" Lucy asked, taking up the reins.

"Thank you, Lucy. I'd appreciate that and I'm sure Adam would as well."

"Do you know what happened, how he was hurt?"

"Well, we're not sure. Two men were supposed to be out there cutting but when Hoss and Joe found Adam, they were gone. Adam wasn't really capable of talking when they found him, he kept falling into unconsciousness, but we suspect that maybe they intentionally felled him along with the tree, probably by accident, and then ran. Sheriff Coffee's been looking into it but that's about all we know."

Lucy nodded. "I'll be back to see Adam again as soon as I can," Lucy said, and started to back up the buggy, then stopped. "If anything…if he gets worse, you'll let me know? Please?"

"Yes," Ben said. "I'll let you know." He stepped back and Lucy left. Ben watched her ride away and then solemnly returned to keep vigil at Adam's bed side.

Lucy returned a few days later and Adam was awake. He smiled when he saw her.

"How are you doing, Adam?" Lucy said, sitting down on the chair by his bed, the one where Ben had sat for hours watching Adam breathe.

Adam still felt drowsy and weak but he wanted to stay awake for Lucy. "Well, I haven't died yet if that's what you mean?" Adam noticed that Lucy had put a book in her lap. "What's that?"

"It's a book, Adam." She held it up. Lucy knew what Adam meant but now that he seemed to be better, she thought she'd return a little of his teasing of her.

"You know what I mean, Lucy. What book is it?"

"It's Candide by Voltaire. Have you read it?" Lucy sat, her hands folded on top of the book.

"No, can't say that I have." He took as deep a breath as his ribs would allow; he couldn't talk for long without getting winded.

"I thought that I would read to you since your arm is in that splint and you can't hold a book-it just came yesterday. Would you like that-if I read it? You can say, no, my feelings won't be hurt." She looked at him as he lay with his eyes closed and her heart softened at the sweetness of his mouth. Lucy always thought that Adam had the mouth of an angel, softly curved with lush, full lips and she remembered the night months ago at Joe's engagement party when he had kissed her with such longing and desperation. But when he turned his head to look at her, she snapped out of the reverie.

He smiled at her. "Yes, I'd like that, Lucy." And he closed his eyes to listen and she bowed her head to read.

"There lived in Westphalia, in the castle of the Baron of Thunder-Ten-Tronckh, a young man upon whom nature had bestowed…."

Adam would chuckle when Lucy read an amusing line and then, when his mouth opened slightly and his breathing softened, Lucy knew he was asleep. She closed the book and placed it on the nightstand, bent over to kiss his forehead and after offering a small prayer thanking God for sparing him, she left.

Thus she came every chance she had and read to him and he became stronger every day. Soon, he was sitting up in bed and alert when she came, the splint gone from his arm which was now wrapped with a length of bandage. She was glad to see his broad smile whenever she arrived but he also teased her, asking her how she found time out of her busy day selling hats to travel all that way to the Ponderosa just to read to an ungrateful invalid. And now, having finished Candide, Lucy had started to read a translation of The Count of Monte Cristo. He would listen and comment on the novel, especially on the plot of revenge, but then one day he asked her about the Christmas Ball.

"Are you going to the ball, Lucy?" Adam asked.

"What?" She looked up from the book.

"The Christmas Ball? Are you going?"

Lucy was flustered. "No, I'm not going."

"Why not? No one ask you?"

"I don't see that it's any of your business." Lucy didn't know what else to say; he had caught her off guard.

Adam laughed. "Now don't be offended, Lucy. I just asked. I was planning on asking you myself but, well, the best laid plans o' mice and men, as Burns said."

"Well, aren't you fortunate then that you were almost killed," Lucy said sharply. "You never had to ask me." She bent her head and began to read again.

"Lucy, stop reading for a minute, would you?"

Lucy stopped and looked at him, trying to control her expression; he had upset her and she didn't want him to know-but she knew he already knew and was trying to apologize.

"I really was planning to ask you. I didn't like the way we left things-you feeling the way you did. I wanted to try to make things right again between us."

Lucy swallowed. "Well, thank you, Adam" Then she looked at him. "I wanted…when I heard you had been hurt, I came out here to…to let you know that I didn't mean what I had said. I regretted the way I spoke to you and all that I said."

Adam reached out to her with one hand. "C'mere, Lucy. Let me kiss you. Let's kiss and make up and be friends again."

She put the book in the chair and went to him. He reached for her and she sat on the side of the bed and he pulled her to him and kissed her, She relaxed, enjoying his mouth, and then, before she could stop him, he had pulled her down and rolled her over on the bed so that she was on the other side of him and he was looking down at her.

"Oh, what…Adam let me up!" But she saw him smiling down at her and then he kissed her again. She started to struggle but succumbed, surrendered and put her arms around his neck and she kissed him back. She felt his hands move on her, caressing her, his hands running over her and she felt herself open to him, to let him have his way with her. He kissed her neck and she closed her eyes as he slowly unbuttoned the neck of her blouse and followed the now-open neckline with his lips.

Suddenly they heard, "Harrumph!"

Adam turned and Lucy sat up, flushed with embarrassment. Ben was standing there holding a small tray of coffee and two slices of pie.

"Hop Sing sent up some coffee and pie. I'm glad that you're feeling better, Adam."

Lucy scooted off the bed by going over the end near the footboard. She smoothed her skirt down and quickly buttoned the neck of her blouse. Then she reached up and smoothed her hair. Adam sat grinning.

"I don't know if you should leave me alone with Lucy anymore, Pa. She tried to take advantage of an injured man." He touched his sore ribs.

"Did that hurt your ribs, Adam?" she asked.

"Just a little," he answered.

"Good." Lucy turned to Ben. "I'm sorry, Mr. Cartwright. I assure you that it won't happen anymore-I won't be lured into such a position again." She turned to look at Adam who was obviously enjoying the situation. "And as for you, Adam Cartwright, I have a good mind to never come to see you ever again." And she started to leave.

"Lucy," Adam called out. She stopped and turned to look at him. "You will though, won't you? You'll come back."

Lucy gave a cry of exasperation and then huffed out of the room. Adam could hear the heels of her shoes tapping on the wooden stairs.

"Adam," Ben said, "why do you tease her so badly. She's not a girl, she a grown woman"

"I assure you, Pa, I am very aware of that. Very aware." Adam relaxed against the pillows, readjusted the bed covers. "Care to join me in coffee and pie?"

Ben just shook his head and sat down to join his son.

TBC