Armstrong gets his sparkles stolen
Edward Elric and his brother were stuck in Mustang's office while Mustang talked them through their latest assignment. Hawkeye looked on, hoping to get the Colonel to do some paperwork after the boys left. And despite Ed's simmering temper, all was relatively peaceful.
Then, Armstrong burst through the door.
"SOMEONE HAS STOLEN MY SPARKLES!"
Silence. Then Ed spoke.
"…Huh?"
"Look!"
Armstrong struck a pose and all four of the room's other inhabitants leaned in for a closer look.
"Well I'll be damned," Roy said, "He isn't sparkling."
"YOU SEE?"
"Alright, calm down, Major Armstrong," Hawkeye said calmly, "Where was the last place you had your sparkles?"
"This is ridiculous," Ed muttered.
"I had them last night! I did a full body workout right before bed and I was sure I had them!"
"Alright, everyone," Roy said, "Let's go look for some sparkles."
As they filed out the door and began to make their way out of the building, Hughes stuck his head out of his office.
"Hey, what's going on?"
"MY SPARKLES ARE MISSING!"
"…What?"
"My thoughts exactly," Ed grumbled.
"C'mon, Hughes," Roy said. "We need all the help we can get."
"…To do what exactly?"
"Find the sparkles."
"…Um, ok. Whatever you say."
And so Hughes joined them as they exited the building and stood outside.
"…What now?"
"I guess we get people to strike poses."
"No, wait! There!"
Hughes pointed to a girl walking across the street. It was hard to see from their position, but she did seem to have a glow about her…
They rushed across the street and confronted the startled girl. She definitely did have a few sparkles floating around her.
"WHY DO YOU HAVE MY SPARKLES?" Armstrong asked sadly.
She looked at him incredulously. "YOUR sparkles? I just got them from a nice sparkly guy."
"What?" Roy said, startled. What did he look like?"
"Um…Skinny. Green hair. Weird hairdo. Weirder outfit."
"Sports bra and a miniskirt?" Ed asked.
"Yeah, actually. Why?"
"…Great. Well, at least we know where Armstrong's sparkles are."
XxXxXxXxXx
Lust was walking through the homunculus' hideout when she passed Envy. She stopped.
"…Envy, are you sparkling?"
"Mmhmm."
"…I don't get you. At all."
She left. Envy grinned. But his grin faded when he heard a large boom nearby. Then another boom. And another. Each time the booms got louder, until finally Alex Louis Armstrong burst through the wall next to him.
"THE ART OF TAKING MY SPARKLES BACK HAS BEEN PASSED DOWN THE ARMSTRONG FAMILY LINE FOR GENERATIONS!"
And here, my friends, is where the term 'Envy bashing' becomes quite literal.
I just loooove picking on poor Envy. : D
And yeah Hughes is dead by the time Roy's working in Central. Whatever.
Armstrong sure loves the caps lock…