Reborn : C13
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J A C O B
I was sprawled restlessly across my bed, unable to sleep, unable to let my mind go to a safer place – a calmer one.
I closed my eyes, the image of Bella, falling to the ground, burned into my eyelids. They snapped open again, my body jolting in frustration; this had been going on for the past hour.
No human would survive that attack. In theory, Bella should have died.
But only a tiny fraction in my mind believed that that possibility still existed; that Bella had closed her eyes for the last time, had breathed her last breath.
Because by now, the filthy bloodsuckers would have turned her. In fact . . . Bella would be fully changed by now.
I swung my legs over the edge of the bed, my feet nearly breaking through the wooden floor. I couldn't sit here. I couldn't.
I left the house as silently as possible, hoping not to wake up Billy; the last thing I needed right now was his calm, philosophical reasoning.
Leaving the house, I broke into a run, feeling the familiar sensation take place as my body phased into that of the giant wolf.
Jacob. Sam's voice greeted me, deadly calm.
Any sign of her? I was still hopeful; another foolish fraction of my mind burned brightly with the false anticipation, knowing that there was no way she could have survived . . .
A jumbled mixture of thoughts passed through my mind; snapshots, images.
Scents.
There's a new scent present near the Cullens' home . . . I'm pretty sure . . .
I ran faster, my paws pounding into the earth. But not positive.And then I found the memory of the scent in Sam's mind, experiencing it for myself.
Sickly sweet, of course. Overpoweringly so.
And yet somehow . . .
My instincts took over, recognizing the face behind the scent. A blurry, shaded image of Bella formed in my mind, tender and laughing, flipping her hair over her shoulder.
Jacob . . .
Why was he so calm? Didn't he understand? Didn't he realize?
An angry growl burned in my throat as I let the wolf in me take over, carrying me far away from the pain that ripped through my heart.
B E L L A
"So . . . where are we going, exactly?"
Edward and I were speeding down the highway, the first signs of night touching the sky. He turned to me, clearly smirking. "You'll see soon enough. Can't you just enjoy the nice, soothing drive?"
I rolled my eyes at him. Sure, the intense speed felt different now . . . I felt safer this time around, less vulnerable. It was almost a comforting experience . . . especially with my hand still deeply intertwined with Edward's.
"Not really. I'm not a fan of surprises, you know."
He sighed, feigning disappointment. "I'm taking you hunting, of course."
I felt a thrill in the pit of my stomach – but not necessarily a good one. "Hunting? Already?"
He chuckled now. "Considering we both have a rather substantial thirst at the moment . . . don't you think that it's a good idea?"
I frowned, more aware of the burning in the back of my throat, of the tense feeling that knotted up my back. "Uh, yeah, I guess. I just wasn't sure if I was ready . . ."
He chuckled again, his dark eyes bright with amusement. "You're as ready as you'll ever be, of course. Being ready simply means being thirsty." His gaze lingered on my face for a moment, his hand lightly tracing the bruise-like shadowing that now circled my eyes. "And you are thirsty . . ."
I managed a weak smile. "Yeah, I guess I am."
In truth, I was nervous. Edward had never allowed me to watch him hunt before – the very idea of letting me do so had horrified him.
I tried to picture myself hunting; stalking a deer, teeth bared, hands extended outward . . .
I laughed. I couldn't help it. The image was so ridiculous in my mind.
"What?" His eyes were on me again, clearly amused.
"Nothing," I answered, the laughter subsiding. "I was just wondering – how exactly do I do it?"
He chuckled. "It being hunting, I presume?"
I smiled sheepishly. "Yeah. I mean, I know you sort of attack the animal, but I don't get how, exactly . . ."
He was quiet for a moment, thinking. "It won't be hard for you, not at all . . . It's more about giving yourself to your instincts more than anything else."
I swallowed. "Ah. Okay. And how do I do that?"
I saw the corners of his mouth turn up, very slightly. "You'll see when you're there. It's very . . . intuitive." He seemed to be laughing at some private joke, and I frowned in irritation.
"It'd better be." I crossed my arms over my chest in mock anger, and he laughed.
Finally, Edward edging the car to a stop next to a broken path on the side of the road. He pulled the key out of the ignition, smiling his crooked smile. "Are you ready?"
I shrugged. "As ready as I'll ever be, I guess."
We left the car, our feet crunching noisily in the montage of leaves and twigs that coated the ground. He stopped suddenly, turning to look at me. "We'll have to run the rest of the way."
I nodded, waiting for him to turned around and crouch so that I could climb onto his back. He stared at me, puzzled.
"Bella, you do realize that you can run on your own, now . . ."
I brought the heel of my palm to my forehead in embarrassment. "Oh, right. Duh. Sorry about that."
He chuckled. "That's quite allright. Now, of course, you may not be able to keep up . . ."
I grinned at his dare. "Probably not."
"Well, let's what you can do, then, shall we?"
And then we ran.
--
"See that deer, over there?" He pointed at a flitting shadow between the trees. I nodded.
"I prefer something a little bit more aggressive," He grinned, knowing that I would immediately remember his preferred mountain lion. "But I suppose deer is a good way to start – if you remember, it was Carlisle's first . . . taste, if you will."
I nodded again. I tried to focus on the unfamiliar ache that was lingering in the pit of my stomach, the tender burning that tinged my throat. "What now?"
He chuckled. "Go on – remember, let your instincts guide you."
I rolled my eyes, but began to walk towards the deer, finally breaking into a run.
Running with Edward as a human had prepared me for the running I would do as a vampire. But I had never expected the feeling to be so enjoyable – the unexpected rush, the feeling of giving yourself to the wind . . . it was all the more stronger when the feat was being accomplished by your own body, rather than depending on somebody else's.
The deer came into view again; it had paused, lifting its head to look at me. Its eyes were large, innocent . . . fearful. I was fiercely reminded of the trite expression -- "a deer caught in headlights".
I was the car. I was going to take it down.
The wild thought seemed to break away a careful barrier that had lay inside of me; suddenly, my thirst was everywhere; in my muscles, as my fingers curled and back tensed . . . in my stomach, as the aching grew furious . . . in my chest, as I heard a low, tender growl purr through me . . .
And of course, in my mouth, I felt the venom begin to collect , coating my razor-sharp teeth. My tongue slipped out, lazily running over my lips.
The deer remained frozen, too stunned to move.
I leapt forward, time seeming to freeze as my feet left the ground.
And then I struck.
It was mostly a blur; I was suddenly on the deer; I wanted the deer . . . I wanted it. I was only vaguely aware of my teeth sinking into its neck, of my hands clawing viciously at its flesh.
The smell of blood cleared away any rational thought – I was the hunter; this was my prey.
As the first of the blood trickled down my throat, the monster inside of me purred, satisfied with my victory. The taste was incredible; it couldn't be properly described into words. At best, I could describe it as vaguely smoky, vaguely sweet . . . but overwhelmingly whole.
I drank eagerly, closing my eyes, savoring the rich flavor.
"Bella,"
I froze, and then snapped my head around, my eyes wide. Who dared to threaten my meal?
Oh. Edward.
I felt myself come back, my mind slowly slipping back into place over the blood-lust, the overwhelming instincts.
With a sudden realization, I knew that once upon a time, I would have been horrified at what I had been doing . . . at Edward being there while I was doing it . . .
But I surprised myself by smiling. "Edward," I stood up, turning away from the deer, away from the temporary beast that now dwelled within me.
His returning smile was hesitant at first, but gradually, it grew into the crooked smile that I loved.
Everything would be easy from now on; we were free.
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Only 2 more Saturdays until Breaking Dawn….I can hardly wait!