A/N: Contains spoilers from GO! I don't own the Titans, but if anyone wants to give me possession of them for this Christmas, I would highly appreciate it. I would have never canceled the Titans if I owned them. I am mixing what I saw in GO! With my own version of their past as I had wrote it before in the prequels to this story. Please bear with me. If you don't want to be spoiled, don't read the chapter, it's alright. It's a good chapter but you won't get too lost with the story if you don't read it :)

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Chapter 12

Yearning and Healing

Cyborg woke up at the sound of his alarm clock. He opened his eyes, welcoming the new day like every day of his life. No one could ever understand his joy and gratefulness towards life, that is, unless someone had been on the verge of dieing and was brought back by a mere miracle…along with some help from technology. He stretched his arms and took a deep breath, exhaling the last remains of drowsiness he might have had. He looked at his arm and saw the time: 7:00AM.

"I feel like making breakfast for everyone," Cyborg thought. Starfire was the only one willing to prepare breakfast for them. At first, it had been painful for the Titans to eat what she made since she had trouble learning the name and use of Earth's food. Little by little, the Tamarean had learned to combine the ingredients and to measure them appropriately. Once she had learned the tricks of cooking, the Titans were always happy to eat what she made…as long as she did not use any of her alien ingredients, that is.

However, after she left, the task of making breakfast had been appointed to whoever had the time and will to cook for everyone in the morning. Sometimes BB had cooked, but he had ended up eating most of the breakfast or "made-up breakfast," like Cyborg called it. Sometimes Cyborg did the cooking but BB refused to eat the "sinner's food." Robin had made the effort to make breakfast but most of the time; he was not in the mood for eating, let alone to even prepare food. Even Raven had made the attempt to prepare breakfast but she had not succeeded in preparing anything edible to no one else but Silkie; and Silkie ate anything.

Cyborg sighed. It was not the early time in the morning that bothered him, or even the fact that he was making breakfast for everyone, even BB; but the current date that worried him. August, the month of August had arrived, marking the 4th month that had passed since Starfire had left. "You have no idea how much we miss you, li'l lady."

Cyborg made his way outside his room, and slowly walked down the path of the hallway. The hall was quiet, too quiet, for a place that was home for 5…4 teenagers and a mutated worm. Cyborg knew Raven was at the roof, meditating. BB was still asleep in his room, and Robin was doing his morning workout in the training room. Robin had been afraid of losing shape with no "work" in the past few months. He had morning training, noon trainings, evening trainings and night trainings.

Cyborg knew, as so did the others, that loosing shape was only one of the reasons he trained too much. The other reason for distracting himself was to forget that one of the members of the team was still not present yet. "Robin needs her…we all do."

Cyborg finally arrived at the main room, specifically the kitchen, and wasted no time in beginning to prepare breakfast. He opened the refrigerator and grabbed what he needed. "Bacon and eggs for Robin and me, tofu for BB," Cyborg thought and closed the door. Raven only drank her herbal tea this early in the morning. "Wouldn't hurt to make some extra eggs for her, right?"

He reopened the door and grabbed more eggs and bacon to have in case Raven felt hungry. "That girl is too skinny anyways; she needs to get more fat around those bones!"

"Who is too skinny?"

Cyborg flinched. He slowly turned around and saw Raven standing by the counter; an eyebrow lifted and her right fingers tapping the table, while her left hand rested on her hips. Cyborg gave her his biggest apologetically smile. "Would you believe me if I told you I was talking about Bumblebee?" Raven shocked her head. "Not really."

Cyborg closed the door again and left the items on the counter. He turned on the stove and began to look for pans and the kettle in the cabinets. Raven sat on a chair, still at the counter. "Need help?" Raven asked while resting her chin on both of her hands. Cyborg shocked his head.

"But maybe you can help me eat it."

"Between you, Beast Boy and Robin, that food will disappear in seconds."

"Perhaps, but I never see you eat, Raven."

"What? Are you saying that maybe I need some fat on my bones?"

Cyborg flinched again. Rave smirked at his reaction. "It's alright," Raven said. "But, do you know who needs fat in his bones also? Robin. He hasn't been eating right…much less sleeping right. Maybe if I eat something, we can convince him to eat as well."

"Sounds like a plan," Cyborg replied. Cyborg continued to prepare breakfast and Raven offered to help to prepare her herbal tea. Cyborg accepted the offer and both of them were soon talking and laughing for the first time in months. There had not been much interaction between the members of the Team in the past months. Many things had happened to them in the past years. Things that had changed them and had made them mature even more, before they even really had to do so.

Cyborg chuckled, "Remember that time when BB thought his mask made him look cool?" Raven smiled. "It wasn't as bad as when I told him that he was funny! I have no idea what I was thinking! I created a monster that day!"

"You like my jokes Raven, don't deny it now!" BB said from his standing position at the entrance of the living room. "If I told you I did, would you stop making jokes?" BB shrugged. "My jokes make people happy, Raven. How can I deny the gift of happiness to the world?" He said while walking to the place Raven had been sitting and taking the seat himself.

"The same way you deny the gift of silence from me." BB glared at Raven. She smirked and returned to what she was doing. "Cyborg, are you making tofu for me?" BB asked pleadingly and Cyborg nodded. "Yes, grass stain, but only for you, no one else is eating it, got it?" BB nodded. "You are the ones missing out on it, not me! I am smart!"

"Whatever you said, dude," Cyborg answered. BB smiled and turned his face to the breathtaking view of the city from the glass wall at their Tower. This was the first time in a long, long time that he woke up this early. He had forgotten the beautiful view the Titans had from their home. "Do you guys remember the first time we noticed this place was awesome to build a house at?"

Cyborg smiled at the memory. They had just defeated the Gordanians, peace was restored to the city, and he had made new friends. That had been the happiest moment of his life until then. "Yeah, that was the day the team started, unofficially but yeah."

Raven sighed. She also remembered that long day. She had been walking around, moping about her destiny with Trigon when she sensed the alien presence. She had not have gotten involved in the fight if it was not for Robin and the others who asked her to stay. "He is green, I am half-robot and she's from space," Raven remembered Cyborg telling her that when she felt bad about using her powers to transport them to the aircraft. "It was then that I realized I had found a home." She thought.

"What about you, Raven? What is it that you remember the most from that day?" Cyborg asked. "If only you knew what that day means to me." Raven thought. She shrugged and decided not to reply. Cyborg and BB understood her silence as a clue that she also held onto that memory with all her might. The kitchen has become silent again for a few minutes until Cyborg spoke again.

"What about BB? He had sparkles on his eyes when he saw Robin, callin' him Sir and all." BB sighed. "Yeah, yeah, I did…so?" Cyborg chuckled and shocked his head. "You acted like such a fan boy, BB. It's not even funny! No, wait…it is!"

Cyborg laughed some more at BB's younger years of innocence but was taken aback when the elevator's bell ringed. Cyborg's laughter stopped, Raven stopped preparing her tea and BB gasped.

As if on cue, the three Titans looked at each other, none of them able to utter a word and trying to remember that their lungs needed air. They had been awaiting her arrival for such a long time, and had spent some more time yearning and reminiscing, that they had forgotten to stop and think what they would do when she returned.

"We hug her to death and welcome her back home, what else?" Cyborg thought. "I take her to the mall." Raven thought. "I tell her a joke!" BB thought. Suddenly, the three young minds connected for what seemed a second, and had the same thought at the same time. "What will Robin do when he sees she is back?" BB could not help to gulp.

Finally, the long seconds after the elevator's ding that had seemed like hours, came to an end and the door of the elevator opened. The Titans turned their attention to the slowly opening door, revealing the person inside the small moving room…and Robin walked out from the elevator.

The Titans' eyes bugged out and sighed in relief. However, their relief was suddenly replaced by sadness again and then by surprise. Cyborg arched and eyebrow when he saw his watch on his arm. Raven looked at the relaxed Robin walk inside the main room. He smiled at them as in a sign of acknowledgment of their presence, and then made his way to the couch. He turned the big screen TV on and rested his steel-toe feet on the table in front of the couch, grabbing the remote on his right hand and extending them to the sides of the back of the couch.

The Titans at the kitchen looked at him questioningly. They all had thought he had been in his room all this time but apparently he had not. BB slyly walked towards Robin and stood behind him. He waited a couple of seconds before poking Robin's shoulder. Robin did not move at all but uttered a low "Yeah?" as a response.

"Care to tell us where you were?" BB asked. Robin shrugged and flipped the channel to the morning news before he replied, "Just cruising around, that's all." BB turned to his friends with a what-he-thinks-he-is-so-smooth face while waving his arms in desperation. Cyborg shrugged and Raven walked towards Robin, her herbal tea on her hands. She hesitated a little before finally sitting a few feet away from him.

"Was there any crime scenes at the city last night?" Raven asked, trying to sound as casual as possible, and then taking a sip of her tea. "Nope, everything's fine," Robin replied and continued to watch the screen. Raven frowned. "We are making breakfast for all of us, I feel like eating something else today, rather than only my tea. Want to join us?" Raven asked, this time with a little bit less of asking tone, but a more demanding tone.

Robin thought about the offer. If he said no, the Titans would ask him why he was not hungry, which would lead to them asking more questions about his whereabouts last night. He could not risk them knowing what he had been doing last night. As a matter of fact, he did not even think they would be up this early. His night escapades had been happening for a while now and none of them had ever noticed, since when he came back, they were not even out of their rooms yet.

On the other hand, if he said no and just left to his room, the Titans might begin to worry about him. He did not want to worry anyone ever again with his problems; not after the last person he had worried about had left his side, perhaps for good. He erased that last thought from his mind and decided to stick to his first option. He was not really hungry, though. He had just eaten breakfast a while ago.

"Sure, why not?" Robin replied and flipped the channel again, this time to an action movie marathon. Raven stood up from the couch and returned to the kitchen to continue to help Cyborg. BB jumped from behind the couch and watched the movie with Robin. Raven placed her cup of tea on the counter and eyed Cyborg. Cyborg replied with a whisper. "He's lying to us."

Raven nodded. Cyborg knew the alarm system was still on but he wondered if Robin had made it silent for them not to hear it. Raven knew he was lying, she could sense it. She also knew that she could just take advantage of their bond and wander on his mind to find the truth. However, doing that had proven to be a big mistake on the past. As much as she and the other Titans wanted to know what their leader was planning, she had to respect his privacy, at least just this once.

After a few more minutes, breakfast was ready and Raven was already setting up the table. Cyborg moved the pans with food to the kitchen table and then called BB and Robin, who were still watching the movie. "Yo, get your asses here! Breakfast is ready!"

Robin turned the TV off, only to hear BB's whining. "But the best part was coming! Five more minutes….please?" Robin said no and began walking towards the table with a muttering BB behind him. Raven and Cyborg sat on one side of the able while Robin and BB sat on the other side. The four Titans sat and began eating, trying to find topic of conversation that was not…

"Dude, before you came in, we were talking about the day we meet, remember?"

Exactly that…

Robin smiled. "Yeah! There I was, trying to go on solo and then I find a little green man who looks at me like if I was an idol of his! How can I forget that?" BB frowned while the other Titans chuckled. "From all the things you could have said, you just had to remember that one didn't you?" BB asked. "I try my best," Robin replied in between chuckles. "Whatever, man!" BB said.

"Come on, Beast Boy! How can I forget your face with the stars above your head and that silly mask?" Robin asked, smirking. "Well…that boy with silly mask saved your butt from getting whipped by a GIRL!" BB said and the table went quiet.

BB covered his mouth with both of his hands. Raven glared at BB and Cyborg's eye went down; so much for a happy breakfast. The Titans expected Robin to excuse himself and leave the table with a sour face but he did not. In fact, he grabbed another bite to eat and after chewing it and eating it, he spoke.

"It wasn't just any girl. It was the strongest girl ever…I wouldn't have mind getting my ass kicked by her. It would have been an honor…" Robin said with his voice almost breaking and full of sorrow.

"I'm sorry dude, I didn't mean to—," BB began but stopped after Robin spoke. "It's ok, it wasn't that bad…I got a kiss, remember?" Robin said, half-smiling. BB smirked, "That's right! How was it?" BB asked. By now, Raven had slapped her face with her hand and Cyborg was shooting daggers with his eye at BB. Leave to Beast Boy to put salt on the cut.

Yet, to the Titans' surprise, Robin smiled again. "Wouldn't you want to know Beast Boy?" Robin said. BB smirked and poked Robin's ribs. "Puh-lease! You were drooling over yourself and trying to follow her with the excuse of finding out if she was a threat! You were all 'They won't take you, not if I can't help it!' and 'I didn't get your name' and blushing…pathetic, man, just pathetic!" BB said making sure he made an awful imitation of Robin's voice when he quoted him.

Robin burst in laughter this time. The Titans gave him a strange look while he punched his chest to stop him from chocking. He drank a big sip of his milk and placed the glass down before laughing some more. "Well, can you blame me? This girl comes to Earth, kicks my ass, kisses me and then leaves? Didn't you think I got intrigued?" Robin asked.

Cyborg smirked. "Yeah, who would have thought that the Boy Blunder would become an alien's bitch?" BB spit his made-believe milk and began laughing. Raven tried her best not laugh but she could not help to scoff to prevent laughter from coming out of her mouth. "So…? Yes, she can do whatever she wants with me! There, I said it! Are you happy now? Besides, it wasn't just any alien…it was a hot alien…" Robin said, accomplishing his task of leaving his friends speechless.

He laughed at his faces and calmed himself down before speaking again in a mocking tone, "Who is laughing now, eh?" The Titans shock their heads and the laughter began again. Finally, after many months of the eeriest sounds of silence around Titans' Tower, laughter now echoed on the walls of their home. "I wanna see you saying that when she's here! Then we would get to see your ass being kicked…again!" Cyborg said between laughs.

"I'll make sure and tell her you were making fun of me and she will take care of your for me," Robin replied. "Take revenge on you…with them? I don't think so. She has better things to do." Raven said.

"Are you saying that she would not avenge my honor?" Robin asked, trying to sound hurt but failing miserably. "First, you would have to explain to her what hot means…oh, wait! You don't have to because the guys at the club and at the mall called her hot already and you have not!" Raven said.

"Well, uhm— then…"

Raven arched her eyebrows mockingly. Cyborg smirked and BB tried his best not to laugh again. "Whatever!" Robin said and filled his mouth with as much food as he could. The Titans finished eating in between jokes and teasing Robin as much as they could. They were happy to have the old Robin back, even if it was only for the time being. They missed their leader and they were sure he also missed them.

After the food was gone and the place was clean, Raven left to her room while BB and Cyborg took over the game station. They invited Robin to play but he was really tired. He had spent the entire night awake and he wanted to shower and take a long nap. He knew he had to return to his newly-found task as soon as the Titans fell asleep, and he did not want to take any chances. "Maybe another day, ah?" was Robin's response.

Cyborg and BB returned to their game and Robin went straight to his room to grab clean clothes, and then made his way to the bathroom. He allowed the water to run until hot water filed the bath tub. "Even a tough guy like me deserves a bath, especially after the night I had." He undressed himself and allowed himself to sink into the tub. "This feels nice."

Robin closed his eyes and remembered the events of last night. He had not expected what had occurred to him, nor did he expect to succeed in his task with such speed. If he knew he the marvels he could have accomplished a long time ago, he would have not hesitated at all before. "All I have to do now is waiting; I have all the time in world now."

Robin sighed and opened his eyes once again. He then realized something. He was in the same place and in the same position Starfire had been when Slade attacked her. He admitted that he had not believed it before, even if Starfire had told him right away. However, after talking to Jones, he now knew not to doubt her. "I haven't seen Slade in a while, though. I have dreamed of him but I haven't seen him. I wonder where he is."

It was true. The last time he had seen Slade was that night at the garage. After that, the nightmares had stayed but he had not seen Slade behind his back or listened to his teasing. "Maybe he gave up," he thought, "or maybe he has found her!" Robin whispered. "No, he doesn't know where she is; he can't travel to Tamaran, can he?"

Robin wished with all his heart that he could not. All the evidence he had that she was alright was the weird dream he had about them. Even then, his piece of evidence was not tangible. "Maybe it was only a dream after all. And I'll be damned if it was! I have to gain courage to pop the question again!"

Robin closed his eyes again, trying to remember his dream about her with as much detail as he could. "She was sad for being apart. She does miss me as I miss her." After remembering her and her voice, he finished his shower. He got dressed and began combing his hair. "Where's my hair gel?" Robin thought.

After looking for it in the cabinet, he was able to find a nearly empty bottle of hair gel. "I need to buy another bottle or I will have to leave my hair down." He was able to comb his hair with the little gel he had, throwing the empty bottle to the trashcan afterwards. "This time I wont buy the cheap one." He walked to his room, fell on his bed, and kissed consciousness goodbye.

Raven walked towards the kitchen. It was 10 at night and she craved a hot cup of herbal tea. The doors of the main room slid opened and she was surprised to see the big screen TV on. "Stupid, Beast Boy! He must have fallen asleep at the couch again." Raven thought. She made her way to the kitchen and poured water on the kettle to then place it on the stove. She turned the fire on and began sighed at the box of different kinds of tea she had in front of her.

After much thinking, she finally decided which one she wanted and pulled it out from the box. She closed the box and placed it back on the top cabinet, just in time to hear the kettle whistle. She quickly turned the stove off, avoiding a night talk with the most likely fallen asleep Beast Boy and poured the hot water on her cup. She placed the tea bag inside it and observed how it quickly began to color the water.

She grabbed her cup with both hands and made her way to the TV. She eyed the room on her path, trying to find the remote so she would not have to risk being seen by BB but, to her bad luck, the remote was nowhere to be found. "We have 20 remotes! 20 remotes and I can't find one?"

Raven arrived at the TV and was close to turning it off when someone's voice stopped her.

"I'm watching that, you know?"

Raven sighed in relief. The voice that she had heard was not BB's voice. It was Robin's voice. She turned to face him and saw he had been laying on the couch. He then he sat. "I didn't see you there before, what are you doing up this late?" Raven asked.

"Couldn't sleep…" Had nightmares again, "You?" Robin asked. "Felt like having tea." She answered. Robin nodded and then sighed deeply. He knew Raven knew he was lying. He was thinking of Starfire and Slade's threats had woken up him from his slumber. Raven thought of leaving him alone but she could not help to still feel like everything was her fault. She had pushed Robin's buttons until he was so sick of being blamed for everything that he ignored Starfire for a while.

"Maybe if I hadn't been so nosy, she would still be here." Raven thought. "But maybe being nosy can get me his whereabouts from last night. He is Robin but he shouldn't be out at night by himself. Especially if he doesn't tell us about it." Now everything that Raven needed was an ice breaker. Something to start the conversation, so she asked the first thing that came to her mind.

"Have you given up on her?" Raven asked Robin "Smooth, Raven, real smooth, why don't you just rub a picture of her to the poor guy's face, eh?" He sighed, and flipped the channel for the 20th time before answering Raven's question. "Not at all…I just figured that she left so she would not see me worry about her, it would suck if she came back to see me looking like I am half-dead. Then her departure would have been in vain, you know? To be honest with you, I can't wait to see her again."

Raven sat next to Robin, seeing that he was in the mood for talking. Maybe she could find out where he had gone the night before after all; and why had he not asked for help with anything that he might had been doing that night. "You are full of surprises, Robin. Do you know that?" Raven asked.

"How come?" Raven took another sip of her tea, this time making him wait for an answer. "You never lose hope."

"I care for her too much to doubt her reasoning. She knows what she is doing. She has never let me down before and she is not going to start now. I know it." Raven could not help to feel bad for her friend. Four months, four months had passed with no word of her well-being. All they could do was to pray and hope she was fine and that she was coming back, soon.

"Do you miss her, Robin?" Such a simple question with a simple answer; or so some might have thought. Yet, Robin knew that the question had more to it. What was exactly what Robin missed? Did he miss the attention? Did he miss the physical presence? Did he only miss the touch? Robin frowned at the mere insinuation of lack of true love in his feelings for her.

"I miss everything about her, Raven. It's like half of me left with her. It makes me feel hollow inside. Like if there exists this big hole inside me and nothing seems to fill it up. I have never felt like this before and it scares me."

"I wish I could tell you I knew she was coming back soon, but I don't know about that. She might take one more day to return, she might take a week, a month or even a year. Are you willing to wait that much? Are you still going to feel the same way about her when she returns?"

"Raven, I always thought that when someone left your side, it was worse for the person leaving because he or she could not take anything with them; because they had to leave everything behind and start all over again. Now I know that it's not true. The person who stays behind is the one who has to deal with the burden of loneliness because he did not have a choice. The person who left had the choice to stay but decided to leave. The real sorrow stays with the one left behind. I don't like that burden, Raven. It hurts like a bitch, but I am willing to hold on to any hope I have for the sake of hearing her voice calling my name, and only my name, again."

"What will you do if she decides to stay and never come back? She has that option, you know?" So much for talking about last night, Raven thought in defeat

Robin frowned even deeper, and Raven swore he saw him flinch at the mere thought of losing Starfire. His fists and jaw clenched tight, trying to restrain the urge to cry like a baby at the possibility of not seeing her ever again. He had not cried on the outside, but in the inside his body was beginning to get filled up with salty water. It was only a matter of time before the tears would make their way to his eyes. "Not now, not in front of them."

Then there was the dream he had months ago, the dream where he had traveled through space to meet up with her. The dream that had renewed his hope and allowed him to express what he felt to her; "I…I want you to…I want you to marry me…" Robin remembered telling her that in his dream. I want to have a normal life…and I want to spend it with you." And he still did.

"Robin…?" Raven still waited for Robin's response. She knew it hurt him to even think about that, but she also wanted to make sure he knew this scary scenario might end up happening. She had to be his dose of reality, not only because it was true, but because she was his friend.

"That is not in my case scenario list, Raven. And if it does happen, I'll deal with it then, not before."

"Close enough," Raven thought and took another sip of her tea. "What are your other case scenarios?" Robin relaxed a little; at least they were not going to talk about Starfire not returning home to them. Robin cleared his throat.

"Well," Robin began, lifting his index finger of his left hand to indicate the first option was coming up, "There is the first scenario, where she comes back, after a while we get married and have lots of babies." Raven smirked. "Then we have case scenario two," Robin lifted a second finger, "She comes back but decides to break up with me…then, with time, I convince her to love me again, and then we get married and have lots of babies." Raven had a big smile on her face by now. "At least he is joking by now. He must be feeling better."

"Finally, case scenario 3," He lifted a third and last finger, "I get my ass on the T-Ship, go to Tamarean, bring her ass back here and then—," Raven interrupted Robin and finished his sentence for him; "you get married and have lots of babies."

Robin smiled and shocked his head. "Not really, Raven. I get her ass back here, we get married, and then we have lots and lots of babies, more than the previous two scenarios, 'cause she made me travel a bunch of light years to get to her." Raven shocked her head. "You have it bad, don't you?"

"Well, yeah…that's what I've been told." Robin answered. Raven stood up from the couch and Robin still chuckled to himself. She extended her arm to Robin and opened her hand. Robin saw something shine on her palm and got closer to get a better look. "What is that? A penny? Are you paying me to make you laugh, 'cause that is Beast Boy's job," Robin said.

Raven rolled her eyes. "No, clorbag! This is a gift a dear friend of mine gave me when I thought everything was lost and had no hope. I held on to it, but I think you need it more than I do right now. Don't lose it because I expect it back from you as soon as you get well."

Robin grabbed the penny and gave it a long look before placing it inside his utility belt. "Thanks Raven." Raven nodded and began to make her way to the main door. It was late and she wanted to go to bed. She walked to the door and before walking out of the room, she spoke to Robin one more time.

"And if you tell Beast Boy I still have that penny he gave me, I will make sure you are not able to have lots and lots of babies." Robin laughed. "K, Raven. My lips are sealed." And with that, Raven left behind the closing door. Robin then turned the TV off before quickly making his way down the elevator, to his R-Cycle. The hours of darkness had arrived, and so had his duty of every night.

"If they ask, I'll tell them I went shopping for hair gel."

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A/N: The REAL story begins in the next chapter. New chapter will be up in a couple of days:)