Hey guys! First I want to say (cover your ears) I DO NOT OWN HARRY POTTER WHATSOEVER! ALL RIGHTS GO TO THE QUEEN HERSELF! Whoo!
Except for my OC's. Those, are the sole property of moi :) Here it is! The second installment in Aurem Quattor!
Wish me luck guys as I try to post this series again.
The next day, started out brightly. The fire of the flying car fiasco had already gone out, but people were still whispering it behind their backs and some of the Slytherin first years had took to admiring Tess. Though their detentions still hung in place.
The Quartet's first class was Herbology with the ever kind and yet plump, Professer Sprout, a squat little witch who wore a patched hat over her flyaway hair; there was usually a large amount of earth on her clothes and her fingernails would have made Harry's Aunt Petunia faint. Gilderoy Lockhart, however, was immaculate in sweeping robes of turquoise, his golden hair shining under a perfectly positioned turquoise hat with gold trimming.
"Oh, hello there!" he called, beaming around at the assembled students. "Just been showing Professor Sprout the right way to doctor a Whomping Willow! But I don't want you running away with the idea that I'm better at Herbology than she is! I just happen to have met several of these exotic plants on my travels . . ."
"Greenhouse three today, chaps!" said Professor Sprout, who was looking distinctly disgruntled, not at all her usual cheerful self.
There was a murmur of interest. They had only ever worked in greenhouse one before - greenhouse three housed far more interesting and dangerous plants. Professor Sprout took a large key from her belt and unlocked the door. Tess caught a whiff of damp earth and fertilizer mingling with the heavy perfume of some giant, umbrella- sized flowers dangling from the ceiling. He was about to follow Ron and Hermione inside when Lockhart's hand shot out.
"Harry! I've been wanting a word - you don't mind if he's a couple of minutes late, do you, Professor Sprout?"
Judging by Professor Sprout's scowl, she did mind, but Lockhart said, "That's the ticket," and closed the greenhouse door in her face.
"Harry," said Lockhart, his large white teeth gleaming in the sunlight as he shook his head. "Harry, Harry, Harry." Completely nonplussed, Harry said nothing. "When I heard -well, of course, it was all my fault. Could have kicked myself." Harry had no idea what he was talking about. He was about to say so when Lockhart went on, "Don't know when I've been more shocked. Flying a car to Hogwarts! Well, of course, I knew at once why you'd done it. Stood out a mile. Harry, Harry, Harry." It was remarkable how he could show every one of those brilliant teeth even when he wasn't talking "Gave you a taste for publicity, didn't I?" said Lockhart. "Gave you the bug. You got onto the front page of the paper with me and you couldn't wait to do it again."
"Oh, no, Professor, see -"
"Harry, Harry, Harry," said Lockhart, reaching out and grasping his shoulder. "I understand. Natural to want a bit more once you've had that first taste - and I blame myself for giving you that, be cause it was bound to go to your head - but see here, young man, you can't start flying cars to try and get yourself noticed. Just calm down, alright? Plenty of time for all that when you're older. Yes, yes, I know what you're thinking! 'It's all right for him, he's an internationally famous wizard already!' But when I was twelve, I was just as much of a nobody as you are now. In fact, Id say I was even more of a nobody! I mean, a few people have heard of you, haven't they? All that business with He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named!" He glanced at the lightning scar on Harry's forehead. "I know, I know - it's not quite as good as winning Witch Weekly's Most Charming-Smile Award five times in a row, as I have - but it's a start, Harry, it's a start." He gave Harry a hearty wink and strode off. Harry stood stunned for a few seconds, then, remembering he was supposed to be in the greenhouse, he opened the door and slid inside. Professor Sprout was standing behind a trestle bench in the center of the greenhouse. About twenty pairs of different-colored ear muffs were lying on the bench.
"What in the Rowling was that all about?" asked Tess. Harry shrugged in response.
When Harry had taken his place between Ron and Hermione, she said, "We'll be repotting Mandrakes today. Now, who can tell me the properties of the Man drake?" To nobody's surprise, Hermione's hand was first into the air.
"Mandrake, or Mandragora, is a powerful restorative," said Hermione, sounding as usual as though she had swallowed the textbook. "It is used to return people who have been transfigured or cursed to their original state."
"Excellent. Ten points to Gryffindor," said Professor Sprout. "The Mandrake forms an essential part of most antidotes. It is also, however, dangerous. Who can tell me why?"
Instead of Hermione, Tess' hand narrowly missed Harry's glasses as it shot up.
"The cry of the Mandrake kills anyone who hears it," she said promptly.
"Precisely. Take another ten points," said Professor Sprout. "Now, the Mandrakes we have here are still very young." Hermione and Tess high fived.
"I didn't know you read." Ron whispered to the American.
"Hermione made me." She said bitterly. "All summer."
"And it helped you, didn't it?" Hermione said, prompting a red faced Quintessa.
"Shut up." Tess muttered while smiling.
"You're welcome, good friend of mine." Hermione whispered.
Sprout pointed to a row of deep trays as she spoke, and everyone shuffled forward for a better look. A hundred or so tufty little plants, purplish green in color, were growing there in rows. They looked quite unremarkable to Harry, who didn't have the slightest idea what Tess meant by the "cry" of the Mandrake.
"Everyone take a pair of earmuffs," said Professor Sprout.
There was a scramble as everyone tried to seize a pair that wasn't pink and fluffy.
"When I tell you to put them on, make sure your ears are completely covered," said Professor Sprout. "When it is safe to remove them, I will give you the thumbs-up. Right - earmuffs on."
Harry snapped the earmuffs over his ears. They shut out sound completely. Professor Sprout put the pink, fluffy pair over her own ears, rolled up the sleeves of her robes, grasped one of the tufty plants firmly, and pulled hard.
Harry let out a gasp of surprise that no one could hear.
Instead of roots, a small, muddy, and extremely ugly baby popped out of the earth. The leaves were growing right out of his head. He had pale green, mottled skin, and was clearly bawling at the top of his lungs.
Tess had seen horror movies, but to her, that was creepy.
Professor Sprout took a large plant pot from under the table and plunged the Mandrake into it, burying him in dark, damp compost until only the tufted leaves were visible. Professor Sprout dusted off her hands, gave them all the thumbs-up, and removed her own earmuffs.
"As our Mandrakes are only seedlings, their cries won't kill yet," she said calmly as though she'd just done nothing more exciting than water a begonia. "However, they will knock you out for several hours, and as I'm sure none of you want to miss your first day back, make sure your earmuffs are securely in place while you work. I will attract your attention when it is time to pack up.
"Four to a tray - there is a large supply of pots here - compost in the sacks over there - and be careful of the Venemous Tentacula, it's teething."
She gave a sharp slap to a spiky, dark red plant as she spoke, making it draw in the long feelers that had been inching sneakily over her shoulder.
Their earmuffs were back on and they needed to concentrate on the Mandrakes. Professor Sprout had made it look extremely easy, but it really wasn't. The Mandrakes didn't like coming out of the earth, but didn't seem to want to go back into it either. They squirmed, kicked, flailed their sharp little fists, and gnashed their teeth; Harry spent ten whole minutes trying to squash a particularly fat one into a pot.
Malfoy was stupid enough to poke it, but he ended up getting his finger bit by it and had a hard time getting it out.
"Note to self." Tess muttered, enduring the screaming wails of the Mandrakes. "Never raise babies."
By the end of the class, Harry, like everyone else, was sweaty, aching, and covered in earth. Everyone traipsed back to the castle for a quick wash and then the Gryffindors hurried off to Transfiguration.
The rest of the day until lunch went by easy. The hall was just as chatty as ever and filled with the sound of students. But to Harry and Tess, they heard to sound of Ron putting Spellotape on his wand. Despite it's name, Spellotape was just that, tape.
"Say it." said Ron miserably. "I'm doomed."
Harry opened his mouth to speak but Tess beat him to it. "Oh no. You my friend are not doomed. You're burning on the stake as we speak."
"Hi!" A cheerful voice spoke up and a flash caught their eye. The boy taking the picture was a very small, mousy-haired boy they had seen trying on the Sorting Hat last night staring at Harry as though transfixed. He was clutching what looked like an ordinary Muggle camera, and the moment Harry looked at him, he went bright red. "I'm Colin Creevy! I'm in Gryffindor too!"
"Hi Colin." said Harry. "Nice to meet you."
"Sup, Colin?" Tess asked nicely.
"Wow!" Colin said amazed. "You're that American!"
"Ron." Dean Thomas interrupted. "Is that your owl?"
Flying into the Great Hall was a brown tawny owl that landed in the bowl of chips, prompting laughter from the entire school.
"Bloody bird's a menace." Ron mumbled. Errol got up, blinked and flew off. Ron took one look at the scarlett letter and paled. Harry, already have witnessed Tess's similar shame, knew what was coming. "Oh crud."
"Look everyone!" The Irish boy Seamus Finnegan called out. 'Weasley's got himself a howler!"
"Go on Ron!" Neville Longbottom nudged. "I ignored one from my gran once. It was horrible."
"In other words open it already." Tess said already fearing the wrath of Mrs. Weasley.
Ron hesitantly opened the red letter and everyone plugged their ears. Harry thought for a moment it had exploded; a roar of sound filled the huge hall, shaking dust from the ceiling.
"STEALING THE CAR, I WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN SURPRISED IF THEY'D EXPELLED YOU, YOU WAIT TILL I GET HOLD OF YOU, I DON'T SUPPOSE YOU STOPPED TO THINK WHAT YOUR FATHER AND I WENT THROUGH WHEN WE SAW IT WAS GONE -"
Mrs. Weasley's yells, a hundred times louder than usual, made the plates and spoons rattle on the table, and echoed deafeningly off the stone walls. People throughout the hall were swiveling around to see who had received the Howler, and Ron sank so low in his chair that only his crimson forehead could be seen.
"- LETTER FROM DUMBLEDORE LAST NIGHT, I THOUGHT YOUR FATHER WOULD DIE OF SHAME, WE DIDN'T BRING YOU UP TO BEHAVE LIKE THIS, YOU, QUINTESSA, AND HARRY COULD BOTH HAVE DIED -"
Harry had been wondering when his name was going to crop up. He tried very hard to look as though he couldn't hear the voice that was making his eardrums throb. Tess on the other hand was dreading to be mentioned within a howler.
"-ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED - YOUR FATHER'S FACING AN INQUIRY AT WORK, IT'S ENTIRELY YOUR FAULT AND IF YOU PUT ANOTHER TOE OUT OF LINE WE'LL BRING YOU STRAIGHT BACK HOME."
A ringing silence fell. The red envelope, which had dropped from Ron's hand, burst into flames and curled into ashes. Harry and Ron sat stunned, as though a tidal wave had just passed over them. A few people laughed and, gradually, a babble of talk broke out again.
"Well, I don't know what you expected, Ron, but you -" Hermione said, closing her books.
"Don't tell me I deserved it," snapped Ron.
Harry pushed his porridge away. His insides were burning with guilt. Mr. Weasley was facing an inquiry at work. After all Mr. and Mrs. Weasley had done for him over the summer ...
Tess didn't feel any better. In fact, she felt like smoking a cigarette, which thankfully she resisted.
Within the afternoon, the hours passing by, Tess found herself in the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom.
The rest of the class came clattering in, and Ron sat next to Harry. Dean Thomas sat next to Tess.
The office opened to reveal Lockhart in his ever bright robes.
"Me," he said, pointing at it and winking as well. "Gilderoy Lockhart, Order of Merlin, Third Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defense League, and five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most- Charming-Smile Award - but I don't talk about that. I didn't get rid of the Bandon Banshee by smiling at her!"
He waited for them to laugh; a few people smiled weakly.
"That's not smiling." Tess whispered to Dean. "That's cringing. And right now I feel the need to cringe even more." Dean chuckled at her humor.
"I see you've all bought a complete set of my books -well done. I thought we'd start today with a little quiz." The entire class looked surprised at Lockhart's sentence. "Nothing to worry about just to check how well you've read them, how much you've taken in -"
When he had handed out the test papers he returned to the front of the class and said, "You have thirty minutes - start - now!"
Tess looked down at her paper and read:
1. What is Gilderoy Lockhart 's favorite color?
2. What is Gilderoy Lockhart's secret ambition?
3. What, in your opinion, is Gilderoy Lockhart's greatest achievement to date?
On and on it went, over three sides of paper, right down to:
54. When is Gilderoy Lockhart's birthday, and what would his ideal gift be?
Tess jaw dropped open. Just when she thought he couldn't get any worse, she was proven wrong. So to have a little fun, she gave her own unique answer to every question.
Puke green
To get laid.
Being born.
And she answered for the last question,
54. Don't know and don't care.
Half an hour later, Lockhart collected the papers and rifled through them in front of the class.
"Tut, tut - hardly any of you remembered that my favorite color is lilac. I say so in Year with the Yeti. And a few of you need to read Wanderings with Werewolves more carefully - I clearly state in chapter twelve that my ideal birthday gift would be harmony between all magic and non-magic peoples - though I wouldn't say no to a large bottle of Ogdeds Old Firewhisky! Oh and who is this Tess Crosswell who wrote as an answer on question 2, "To get laid?" Tess raised her hand, trying not to snigger at his reaction. "Can you tell the class what it means?" That got Tess howling with laughter and the class stared at her weirdly. "Well?"
"Part of me wants to tell you guys." said Tess wiping her tears. "The other tiny sane part says telling you all second years, will take away your innocence and view of the world. In other words, some things are better left a mystery."
Lockhart gave them another roguish wink. Ron was now staring at Lockhart with an expression of disbelief on his face; Seamus Finnigan and Dean Thomas, who were sitting in front, were shaking with silent laughter. Hermione, on the other hand, was listening to Lockhart with rapt attention and gave a start when he mentioned her name. Yet she wanted to know badly what Tess meant by "getting laid."
". . . but Miss Hermione Granger knew my secret ambition is to rid the world of evil and market my own range of hair-care potions - good girl! In fact" - he flipped her paper over - "full marks! Where is Miss Hermione Granger?"
Hermione raised a trembling hand.
"Excellent!" beamed Lockhart. "Quite excellent! Take ten points for Gryffindor! And so - to business -"
He bent down behind his desk and lifted a large, covered cage onto it.
"Now - be warned! It is my job to arm you against the foulest creatures known to wizardkind! You may find yourselves facing your worst fears in this room. Know only that no harm can befall you whilst I am here. All I ask is that you remain calm." In spite of himself, Harry leaned around his pile of books for a better look at the cage. Lockhart placed a hand on the cover. Tess was a bit interested. Dean and Seamus had stopped laughing now. Neville was cowering in his front row seat. "I must ask you not to scream," said Lockhart in a low voice. "It might provoke them." As the whole class held its breath, Lockhart whipped off the cover.
"Yes," he said dramatically. "Freshly caught Cornish pixies. "
Seamus Finnigan couldn't control himself. He let out a snort of laughter that even Lockhart couldn't mistake for a scream of terror.
"Yes?" He smiled at Seamus.
"Well, they're not - they're not very - dangerous, are they?" Seamus choked.
"Don't be so sure!" said Lockhart, waggling a finger annoyingly at Seamus. "Devilish tricky little blighters they can be!"
The pixies were electric blue and about eight inches high, with pointed faces and voices so shrill it was like listening to a lot of budgies arguing. The moment the cover had been removed, they had started jabbering and rocketing around, rattling the bars and making bizarre faces at the people nearest them.
"Oh I'm so scared!" Tess announced sarcastically.
"Right, then," Lockhart said loudly eying the American witch. "Let's see what you make of them!" And he opened the cage. It was pandemonium. The pixies shot in every direction like rockets. Two of them seized Neville by the ears and lifted him into the air. Several shot straight through the window, showering the back row with broken glass. The rest proceeded to wreck the classroom more effectively than a rampaging rhino. They grabbed ink bottles and sprayed the class with them, shredded books and papers, tore pictures from the walls, up-ended the waste basket, grabbed bags and books and threw them out of the smashed window; within minutes, half the class was sheltering under desks and Neville was swinging from the iron chandelier in the ceiling.
"Hold still!" Tess yelled at Neville before throwing one of her books at the chandelier and Neville came crashing down on her before she had time to react.
"Come on now - round them up, round them up, they're only pixies," Lockhart shouted. He rolled up his sleeves, brandished his wand, and bellowed, "Peskipiksi Pesternomi!"
It had absolutely no effect; one of the pixies seized his wand and threw it out of the window, too. Lockhart gulped and dived under his own desk, narrowly avoiding being squashed by Neville, who fell a second later as the chandelier gave way.
The bell rang and there was a mad rush toward the exit. In the relative calm that followed, Lockhart straightened up, caught sight of Harry, Tess, Ron, and Hermione, who were almost at the door, and said, "Well, I'll ask you four to just nip the rest of them back into their cage." He swept past them and shut the door quickly behind him.
"Can you believe him?" roared Ron as one of the remaining pixies bit him painfully on the ear.
"He just wants to give us some hands-on experience," said Hermione, immobilizing all pixies at once with a clever Freezing Charm and stuffing them back into their cage.
"Hands-on? "said Harry, who was trying to grab a pixie dancing out of reach with its tongue out. "Hermione, he didn't have a clue what he was doing -"
"Rubbish," said Hermione. "You've read his books - look at all those amazing things he's done -"
"He says he's done," Tess muttered. "Like I said before, a Grade A phony."