White

Chapter 12

Believing

(A/N I'm home sick today with some sort of tummy bug. I figured I'd get to writing some more. This is a turning point in the story. I hope everyone enjoys it.)

SOUNDS/sounds

Thoughts

Disembodied Voices

(Last Time)

"Stubborn," he sighs in an annoyed tone, turning from me. "One. That's all you get. One outburst from him no matter how small you're off that case."

"That's fair. I can totally do that," I nodded in agreement. "Thank you. I'll try my hardest even if it only lasts a day or two."

"I still shouldn't let you," he grumbles, focusing on the TV and his eyes narrow. "It seems the family of that kid that kill himself has decided to put it on the news despite us coming up with an agreement to keep it all disclosed. That's really not going help their case by going against our agreement."

I turn back to the TV to see what Father was talking about. Sure enough there was the hospital pictured on the screen and there's a picture of the boy that died. What a mess everything is turning out to be and I fear things might only get worst.

(Ichigo's POV 12:03 AM)

"NOOOOO!" I scream out!

I can't move! Why can't I move? Where am I? What is this place? I-I can't figure out where I am! Dammit, why can't I move my body?

"Easy, easy, now! Calm down!" I turn to my right and see a man standing there. Who's that? "You just woke up from a nightmare. You've been thrashing around for hour or so."

"Wh-what?" my voice catches in my throat as I breathe heavily. A small light is turned on over my head, giving the room some illumination. "I don't… Where?"

"You're at the hospital. Now calm down. You're going to hurt yourself thrashing around like that," the man tells me and I look around the room some more. "See? You're okay. You were just dreaming."

"Dreaming…?" I mutter as my eyes adjust to the light overhead. "I-I…"

"You need a nurse?" he asks me and I shake my head. I'm starting to come around now. I now notice the man as one of my guards. "All right, just calm down."

I try to settle myself back down in my bed as the guard goes to take his seat again. Dreaming…? That nightmare… I'm in a cold sweat again and my body is shaking, badly. My heart is pounding hard in my chest. I can even hear it in my ears, thumping loudly. I don't like it. It was even more vivid than the last. I could make more details. I could feel even more pain and taste more blood in my mouth. It felt like my body was cut wide open yet burning at the same time. That black figure… I came close to making out a face for him. There were also more black figures this time and a lot of them. Almost like an army. I noticed noticed that there were two people at my feet. They were my friends or something. I don't know why I want to call them that but that's what they feel like to me. That one lone figure that attacks me. I can't shake him for my mind. I feel like he's the leader of that black colored army.

My mouth feels so dry. I turn to look at the guard as he reads his book. The other one isn't here. I wonder where he went. I let out a long sigh as I spot my cup of water on the table so close to me yet completely out of my reach. I do so hate these restraints. If I want to do one damn them I have to ask for it. I hate it but I need to ask him for my cup. My tongue is sticking to the roof of my mouth. Shit.

"Hey, I need some water," I state as the guard looks up from his book.

He gets up and sets the book down on his seat. He takes a few short steps to the table and picks up the cup. He brings the straw to my mouth. The water hits tongue and throat, bringing me some relief. I turn my head when I have enough. He sets the cup back down and goes back to his chair and book. It's very quiet in here. The only sound is coming from the heater by the window. The clock on the wall is reading 12:10. This is going to be a long night. I'm not going to like it one bit.

Ha! You don't know what a long night really is!

"The hell?" I snap, looking around the room.

"Is something the matter?" the guard asks me, peeking over his book.

"I, uh… No…" I put my head back down on the pillow and he goes back to damn book.

Hahahahaha! My, my, what a situation you have put us in! Too bad.

What do you mean us? I ask as I notice that voice isn't really coming from my ears.

Hmmm? Well, now… I mean us plain and simple. You and me, of course. Hadn't you pitched that fit we wouldn't be here, strapped down. However, you're little fit also helped me out a good bit. You needed that shock to let me out. So, I can't complain too much, now, can I?

What are you talking about? I ask the voice, bluntly.

Hahaha! You can't figure it out? That's fine I can be your subconscious for the time being. I can't really do much now anyway. That sucks, but at least you can hear me now. Ha!

What? I don't understand, I snap at the voice. Who are you?

I'm really surprised you don't know who I am. Can't you tell by my voice? You gave me a nickname once when you were eleven.

Nickname…? I ponder on the idea for a moment. No, it can't be!

Oh, yes, I'm still very much here! I've been around for years! I just couldn't do much but watch as you live out your pathetic excuse for a life. And you really are pathetic!

Shut up! I snap at the Devil as I clinch my teeth, hard.

Now, now… No, need for that. I am not your enemy, not even once. Actually, I'm here to help you.

I doubt that! You made me hurt all those people! You're the reason why everyone is scared of me, I bite out at the Devil in my head.

Really? Think back. Even before I came to be known, people were already weary of you. Your school for example. They were the ones that put you here in the first place. Not to mention those little temper tantrums towards the nurses and doctors. You would hit, kick, and bite them. People were already scared of you. I just knocked up the fear a couple more levels, that's all. It's was already in your nature to be like that.

But you didn't help! I remember fragments of what I did! I regretted every—

DON'T LIE! You enjoyed it! You knew you should regret something like that, as society has taught you! But inside no matter how hard you try to deny it you actually enjoyed it. You reveled in it. Right now we are separate but we are still one in the same. I am you and you are me.

I don't believe that! I wouldn't willing hurt anyone to that degree on my own! I retort back, clinching my teeth harder and my fists tighter.

Maybe not yet but you have to admit that your willingness to hurt others has gotten stronger over the last few years. I know you fantasize about how you would like to hurt people. In fact, if you could, you'd like to kill a few people, especially Dr. Ishida. Don't deny it. It's crossed your mind several times. You have several scenarios on that matter alone. All involving slow torture and I must say I like that.

Stop it! A thought is a thought! Nothing more! I snap back. I would never kill anyone!

But thoughts that dwell too long can become actions. I know you want to do it, but you just don't have the courage yet. That's fine. We've both got time. But you should know that time is not your on side but it is for me. Now that I'm here don't be surprise if you start to notice some changes.

What do you mean by changes? I demand quickly as I start to notice his presence leaving me. Hey, what do you mean by that! Answer me!

You'll know…

And like that, the Devil was gone. My body is shaking again, in anger this time. What did he mean by changes? I don't understand. I slowly loosen my jaw and it aches badly. I also release my fists. My hands have bad cramps in them from being clinched like that. So, he's always been around, has he? I let out a ragged sigh and turn to look at the guard. His nose is glued to that book. He's totally oblivious as to what happened just now. I turn to look back at the ceiling; a horrible white tile ceiling. Why must I be tortured by something as simple as a color? It's disgusting!

All I can do now is just dwell on what happened. That monster is back and he is here to stay. I don't like that idea. Not one bit. He is me and I am him? Never! Not even once. I refuse to believe that we are one in the same. We can't be. I don't want to believe that. But there is a fear building me that I can't deny. Just what did he mean by changes?

(Uryu's POV 1:32 AM)

I lie awake watching TV out of boredom. I really dislike this apartment. Kitchen, living room, and bedroom are all in one. The only separate room is the bathroom. My couch thankfully is a futon. I just need a new mattress for it. I yawn. I guess I need to get some sleep. I've got more school work in the morning. I'm just glad I don't have to go into school, that's all I'm saying. I sit up and reach for the remote at the end of the bed. I turn off the TV and adjust my pillows. I should probably take a pain pill but I'm too lazy to do so. I let out a long breath and roll over.

It doesn't take me long to settle but I just can't sleep. I worried about what's going on at the hospital. I know it's really eating away at Father. It's not really my concern directly but… I let out another breath. I try to push all of that out of my mind so I can sleep soundly.

Shuff… Shuffff…

What's that? I open eyes but remain still. It sounds like something is dragging. I puzzle on what that could be. I don't want to make a move as my bed makes a lot of noise. Do I have a mouse or something? I really hope not. I keep hearing it. It's not far from me. It sounds like it's coming from behind the head of my futon. Behind the couch is a wide open area leading to the kitchen. It's rather dark in my apartment I hope I can see what it is. I carefully reach for my glasses and carefully move a little farther up to peer over the end. The noise stopped. I know whatever it is, is still in here. I just need to wait it out.

Shuffff… Shuffff…

There it is again. I look for any sign of movement on the floor. I finally see something. It's pale in color and doesn't really a have defined shape. What is that? It's certainly bigger than a mouse, hell a cat for that matter. I'm curious as to what that is but I'm also a little nervous about going over there. I need to know what it is. I decide to climb over the head of my futon, which was easier said than done in the dark. I forgot my school books were there and nearly tripped on them. That hurt a bit. It was also a stupid move because of my knee. I remain perfectly still for a bit keeping my eyes focused on the bulky object almost in the kitchen.

Finally it started to move again after a couple of minutes. I need to sneak up on it but what am I going to do when I find what it is? I need something in my hand just in case. I move carefully towards the closet by the door. I have a bat in there not to mention some archery equipment. I doubt I'll need anything like that. The bat should be good enough. I slide the door open just enough to get my arm in. I feel around to find the handle to the bat. Got it! I slowly pull it out to make sure I don't hit it against anything.

Okay, this was it. I carefully make the short distance towards the moving object. It's still too dark for me to tell what it is. It doesn't seem to be aware of me, yet. I move in a little bit more and hold the bat over my head. I'm going to hit it first before it takes notice of me. I quickly bring down the bat as hard as I can!

"YYAAAAHHH!"

"THE HELL!" I stumble back as the object screams at me. And I mean screams! It sounded human!

I grip the bat hard again as I watch the object roll around on the floor. I hit it once more and again it screams at me. What is this damn thing? I hit it yet again, this time I use the bat as a driver. I send the object into the front of the stove. I quickly hurry over and turn on the light over the stove. I look down to see it's my tote bag and it's moving. Not to mention it's also yelling and cussing at me. What hell is going on? I put my foot down on the tote as the thing inside tries to get out from under my weight. That fact that the object within is cussing at me bothers me the most. I need to know what's inside.

"Get off of me, you son of a bitch! You're hurting me, dammit! Shit!" it yells at me as reach for the zipper. I lick my lips nervously as my fingers grab the zipper and pull it open. "When I get out of here I'm going to kill you!"

That doesn't sound too good. I pull back the edge of the bag with my foot still on it so it can't go anywhere. My eyes grow wide as they fall on the last thing I ever expected to see! It's my stuffed lion and it's moving and screaming under my foot!

"AAAAGH!" I stumbled back into the stove. That hurt like hell!

"Asshole," the lion grumbles at me as he pulls himself out of bag and rubs his back. "You don't go around hitting people like that!"

"FUCK," I yell, kicking the lion into the pantry door. "What the hell are you?"

"What is it with people and wanting to kick me into things?" he yells as me as it gets back to his feet. "That really hurts! NO! Wait!"

I take the bat and slam him against the pantry door and hold them there! What am I going to do with him and what is it? It's clearly the lion I had made but what is going on? I… I don't know what to do! I honestly don't!

"Let's go of me, you bastard," he yells at me, trying to squirm out from under the bat. "You're hurting me!"

"How?" I ask, leaning in a little more on the bat. To say I was freaked out would be an understatement. "You're not… You don't even have real body!"

"STOP IT! SERIOUSLY!" he yells at me. "I don't know how any of this works!"

"What are you?" I demand, loudly.

"Well, I was human about 24 hours ago! Why don't you ask that bitch Orihime what she did to me," he snaps at me, still struggling against the bat. "She put some kind of charm in this damn stuffed animal and she trapped me in this body! Honest!"

"What?" I ask, shaking my head! This makes no sense whatsoever! "I don't understand! You're not making any sense to me!"

"I'm trying to spell it out to you, brother! As of last night I was human! Well, in spirit form more or less," he grumbles at me. "Ever hear of astral projection?"

"Kind of," I mutter, not quite sure.

"Well, basically I would come see Orihime at night and then last night she suddenly puts me in this stupid plush toy," he bites out, kicking at me. "That idiot trapped me in here and my physical body died at the hospital next door! Does that clear things up for you? I just died and I'm stuck in a toy!"

I just stare at him as my mind tries to process everything. What? I hear what he said but I still can't wrap my mind around it. I start going through the story bit by bit. When an idea hits me! This was the bastard Orihime had been hinting as her tormentor. Well, well, well...

"Hold on a minute! You would visit her at night, right?" I asked as he suddenly looks a tad nervous. "You were the one having your way with her!"

"Hey, now! Wait a minute! Don't do anything rash!" he yells at me in a panic. "I'm fragile! Very, very fragile! I can tear very easily!"

"Not that easily," I grumble, grabbing him with my hand and removed the bat. "I know just what to do with you for the time being."

"N-no seriously, I'll tear," he chatters as I bring him up to my face.

"I made the plush toy you're in! If I can make you, I can brake you," I growl at him, bending down to pick up the tote bag. "Time to get back in the bag."

"No, wait! Don't put me back in there! C'mon, brother, be nice about this! I just died," he whines at me, kicking his legs frantically. "Show a little respect for the dead, why don't cha?"

"Why? I have no sympathy for the devil," I smile as I shove him back into the small tote bag and zip it up. "Oh, boy…"

I sit on the bench in the laundry room, which is located on the basement floor of the building. It's quiet down here at night. I have no idea what I'm going to do with him. I watch as he spins around and around in the dryer. His time is about up. I figure this might be the best way to punish him for now. I can't get him wet so I just figured I'd make him take a good long run in the dryer. That should do the trick.

But honestly what am I going to do with… With that thing? If Orihime was trying to make a point to me about something she nailed me good. I know she did it to get him away from her but I have a feeling, given what I've heard, she also did it for Ichigo. She wanted to prove to me that Ichigo isn't crazy. Well, not entirely, anyway. I bite my lip as I look up at the dim florescent lights above me. I have the toy as proof but… My father… I need to show him but at the same time… Oh, geez, what do I do? Shit…

I hear the buzzer for the dryer go off. I get up, walk over to the appliance, and open the door. I hear him moaning and groaning in the drum. I pick him up and place him back in the tote bag. I hurry back up to my apartment. The elevator is broken so I have to go up about 5 flights of steps. Just my luck. I quickly unlock my door and walk in. I shut the door behind me and hurry back over to my bed. I set down the bag and pull out the dazed toy. He seems to be coming around.

"Don't… Don't you ever… Do that again," he groans at me, holding his head as he sits up. "And sit still, will ya…"

"I'm not moving around," I tell him, leaning him against the pillow so he can sit up. "You deserved that."

"I died last night, wasn't that enough for you? Geez," he grumbles, leaning back against my pillow. "I will get you back for this! Not now but I will. That's a promise."

I rub the bridge of my nose. What do I do with him? How long does the charm last? Is it permanent? I can't just get rid of him but I don't want him here either. He freaks me out! Oh, damn! How do I actually handle this? Talk about the ultimate curve ball. I let out a deep breath and slump a bit as the lion leans farther back on the pillow. I don't have anywhere I can put him. He'll just have to stay here. Damn…

"What are you moaning about?" he asks me, crossing his arms.

"A lot of things…" I sigh, looking down at my left hand. The bandages have come loose I need to replace them shortly. "For starters, you're going to have to stay here."

"Oh, yeah… Not like have much of a choice, as my body is most likely in cold storage right now," he barks at me.

"What am I going to do…?" I mumble, looking at the floor.

I've got to show him to my father that's a given, but how? I can't just bring him back to hospital with me. I'll have to have father come over here or I have to record the lion. I can do that with my phone! I don't have a real camera but he needs to see this. It might help Kurosaki in the end. However, his tantrums still requires that he remain isolated. This will only help him so much but it might be just what Kurosaki needs.

"Stay put," I tell the toy as I get up and grab my phone from the charger.

"Are you going to record me? You think this is going to get you famous on the internet or something like that?" he sneers as my phone turns on. "Not going to happen. I'll just pretend I'm an average stuffed animal!"

"It's not for the internet," I tell him as I wait for it to finish booting. "My Father owns part of the mental hospital. There's a patient that could sort of use your help."

"Not going to happen," he snaps, going limp as I turn on the camera.

"Please, you have to! You really don't understand," I plead with him but he does move an inch. "Please, I'm serious about this. Without your help Ichigo will be in deep water when he gets back. Not to mention you will close the case for Orihime. You'll make a lot of things better for other people."

He still won't move or make a sound. He won't help me willingly. I'll just have to get drastic again. I grab him with one hand as the other holds the camera still on him. I'll just threaten him.

"You want to go in the dryer again? I can do that right now," I snap at him but still no response. "I'm not bluffing! Please, move or say something!"

He's being so damn stubborn. Fine, if he wants to be that way. I turn off the camera and quickly shove him back in the small bag. If he thinks I'm playing he's got another thing coming. I'm in no mood to put up with this. I start heading out the door once again.

"I'm not helping even if you do throw me back in the dryer," he tells me, bluntly. "This is what you get for throwing me in dryer to begin with."

"I'm letting you live here so you can be a bit more respectful to me," I bite out as I turn back on the camera. Maybe I can get him by surprise. "It's just a simple request."

Again he's quiet and not moving. How did he know I turned back on the camera? It does make a sound when I hit record. Damn it. I don't know how to change the setting for that. I run a hand down my face and I toss him and the bag back on the bed. My leg can't take much more of this running back and forth. I sit back down on the bed and unzip the bag. I have to catch him off guard or bring father over here but even then he could fake not being alive so to speak. Damn it!

"Pisses you off, doesn't it?" he asks, peeking out of the bag at me. "Serves you right!"

"Shut up," I groan as I fall back onto my bed. "You really could be a benefit to a lot of people."

"Not going to happen. I don't owe you or anyone else a thing," he states, walking over my head and kicks me. Not that it actually hurt. "So there!"

"I'm Ishida Uryu by the way," I tell him as I still look up at the ceiling.

"What? Oh, yeah… I'm Takahashi Kon," he says, sitting down beside my head.

I slowly sit up remembering my hand needs re-bandaging. I get up to get my bandages, spray, and tape. I want a pain pill but I'm not about to take one with him hanging around. I get the needed supplies and turn the light on above my bed. I take off the old bandage and toss it into the trash. Hear Kon hiss as he looks at the cuts and stitches in my hand.

"I've got 31 stitches," I boast, holding up my hand. "Lovely, isn't?"

"Yuck," he shakes his head and shivers a bit.

I spray my hand down and let that dry a bit before putting new gauze on my hand and taping it down. I put everything away before turning off the light again. I need to get some sleep but I don't know how to do that with him here. It's rather awkward and creepy but I need some sleep. It's already a little after 3 in the morning. I yawn a bit, looking down at Kon. Ha… I even got him to do it too.

"I don't know what you want to do, but I need sleep," I state, sitting down on my bed. "So, good night."

I left the light over stove on. I need some light in here with my new house guest being here. I get my pillows and fix them up before pulling the covers over my shoulders. I let out another yawn and set my glasses back down on the table. I really need some sleep. I don't care what Kon does as long as he doesn't bother me. He can't get out the apartment so I'm not worried about that.

"Can I watch some TV?" he asks, finding the remote on the end of the bed.

"Just keep it down," I moan as the TV comes on. "I have a lot of school work in the morning."

"Yeah, yeah," he mutters, turning down the volume.

I listen as he goes through the channels. I need to figure out something to do with him. He won't get on camera and I fear he'll play coy if I bring my father over. I don't want to bring him back to the hospital. Murphy's Law will have a field day with that. I'll just have to catch him off guard is all I can figure to do. However, I know I can help Kurosaki some by knowing that he isn't seeing things. I just hope I can help him in some way that doesn't involve anymore stitches.

(A/N Yay! The chapter is finished. I told you it was going to have some turning points. What are your thoughts on it? Let's see were things go from here. I wanted to start really moving things along. I hope this was a good chapter. Later!)

Millie M. Banshee