Chapter four continuation

The ceremony was now coming to an end. The room was being emptied out as people went on to continue their daily business. Only the council members, Guinevere and a select other few would travel down to the catacombs where Arthur would be 'laid to rest'. Merlin was not included in the select few, nor was Gaius.

The room had now been emptied out aside from the individuals whom were to accompany their king to his final resting place, figuratively speaking. Arthur had been laid to rest at The lakes of Avalon, but formalities and traditions must be upheld. Gaius and Merlin were both asked to leave the throne room, as the next part of the ceremony was about to begin. The doors were closed shut behind them after they left the room, silent glances being exhanged between the physician and his ward.

"How are you holding up, Gaius?" Merlin asked in a concerned tone of voice, placing a hand upon his mentor's shoulder. A weak smile was offered in response. "I will be fine, my boy." Gaius responded, placing an arm behind Merlin's shoulders, patting lightly, before he headed off in the direction of the Physician's chambers. Merlin followed a few paces after Gaius as they made their way up the winding staircase.

Gaius pushed open the door, holding it for Merlin letting him enter the room before he closed the door behind them. Merlin took a seat at the table, leaning his elbows onto the piece of furniture whilst watching Gaius with observant eyes. Silently the elderly man went about his business, resuming his work without a single word being spoken. The silence was rather overwhelming, and after a short while Merlin finally spoke. "Need any help, Gaius?"

His question was met with a slightly raised eyebrow, which was then accompanied by a nod. "If you have nothing to do, you can prepare these herbs for drying" Gaius spoke, gesturing towards the basket of herbs that had been brought to his chambers, but not processed in any form or way.

"Sure" Merlin responded, rising up to his feet. He picked the basket up from the floor, clearing some space on the work desk, before he sat the basket down on a chair. He received some thread, and then begun the process of binding the stems of the plants, so that they could be hung up in order to dry. There was silence again, except for the sounds of the pestle and mortar that Gaius was currently operating, and the gentle sound of the plants moving against each other. He kept a keen eye on Gaius' facial expression, whilst dedicating enough focus to his own work. From the deep lines on Gaius' face it was evident that he was struggling emotionally, whilst attempting to maintain a solid and stoic facial expression as he worked, not to mention the work that was being done were things that could wait until a different day, which made it clear that the physician was attempting to distract himself. Gaius looked as though he could take to tears at any given moment should his focus be broken. It was difficult seeing Gaius in this emotional state, but it was very understandable. The man had been suppressing his grief ever since the news of Arthur's death had reached him, and he knew that he'd have to work through it sooner or later. It may be best if he did it sooner, rather than later, seeing how Merlin wouldn't be there for much longer, and if he dealt with it later, then he'd be almost entirely on his own.

"Gaius. Are you all right?" Merlin questioned, his gaze now fully set onto the older male. No response.

"Gaius?" Merlin repeated, his hands ceasing their movements as his brows begun to furrow ever so lightly. Gaius stopped what he had been doing as well, taking a rather deep breath as he did so.

"I am fine, Merlin." was his response, before his hands resumed the work they had been doing only a brief moment before. His voice had trembled when he had spoken, the way ones voice trembles when you have a lump in your throat whenever you are attempting to not cry. Gaius wasn't all right.

If only the stubborn oaf of an old man had acknowledged the fact that he wasn't all right, instead of attempting to hide it, then it would have been so much easier for him, but no. It could never be easy, could it? Now he had to nudge carefully in hopes of getting Gaius to open up to him, with the risk of the elderly man shutting him out completely.

"I don't think you are fine, Gaius." Merlin spoke, and upon doing so the lines on Gaius' face visibly deepened. His hands stopped moving again as well.

"What do you want me to say, Merlin?" the man muttered, his voice sounding choked and coarse.

"The truth. You are like a father to me, Gaius. I want to be there for you, but you won't open up to me. You won't talk to me about how you truly are feeling about everything that has happened. You don't have to be strong or brave for me, Gaius, nor do you have to for anyone else either. Talk to me Gaius, I beg of you. Seeing you this way, with no way of helping you.. It pains me more than you know." Merlin spoke.

It did not seem like Gaius could hold it any longer, his hands clenching tightly around the pestle and mortar, his eyes closed shut and as he exhaled, a sob escaped the body of the elderly man. Merlin did not waste a single moment, closing the small distance between the two, before he moved to close his arms around his mentor and father figure. "I am sorry, my boy. I am truly sorry." Gaius let out, closing his arms around Merlin in return, as he continued to shed tears.

"No, no. Don't apologize. You have nothing to apologize for. I understand, Gaius. You mean so much to me Gaius, and to Guinevere as well. I don't know what we could have done without you being there for us, but now it's our turn to be there for you. It goes both ways. You shouldn't ever have to try to shoulder everything on your own." Merlin spoke, tightening his hold ever to lightly.

"You sound an awful lot like me, Merlin." Gaius replied, a light attempt at a joke through his tears. "Of course. I learned from the very best." Merlin replied, a small smile appearing on his face.

The sun had set before the ceremony had finished in the catacombs. Guinevere was beyond exhausted, but there was still the banquet that was being held in Arthur's honor left. It wouldn't be much time to rest before she had to attend to this feast as well. She encountered Merlin waiting outside her chambers, the man offering her a small smile as he laid eyes upon her. He courteously opened the door for her, allowing her to step inside the room, before closing the door shut behind the two.

"Water? Wine?" Merlin asked, raising his brow lightly in an attempt to gage out Guinevere's current mood. "Water is fine, Merlin. Thank you." She replied, offering him a tired smile as she dumped down on a chair with such a lack of grace, that a sack of potatoes would have looked more graceful.

"Had a rough time?" He asked as he poured the water and extended the cup towards her. She took it and only nodded her head lightly. "Want to talk about it?"

"I feel like I have done enough talking for a year.. So no, I'd rather not." she let out, accompanying the statement with a very brief chuckle. "Understandable."

He sat down at the table, leaning his elbows lightly onto the piece of furniture. The room was unusually silent, revealing just how tired Guinevere must be.

"Did you tell Gaius yet?" Guinevere spoke. Merlin shook his head as a response. "Couldn't find the right moment. I'll tell him tonight." Merlin spoke in response.

"Merlin! He deserves to know, don't you think?"

"I know he does, but I just never found the right time. I -will- tell him some time tonight." He reassured. "I wouldn't leave without telling him beforehand anyways. Not when things are the way they are."

"Good." Guinevere replied, offering up a small smile as she did so.

"We have a long night ahead of us, Merlin. Are you sure that you don't want to sit with the guests?" She questioned.

"Yeah, I am sure. It wouldn't feel right."

"You'd better stay hydrated then. I do not want you passing out on us again."

"You got it, Gwen."

The banquet begun, and Guinevere and Merlin found themselves holed up in the banquet hall along with Gaius, the knights and a large mass of unfamiliar faces. The voices blurred together, and many approached Guinevere in order to offer their condolences at the loss of her husband. The room was filled with chatter about Arthur, stories being told and memories shared between those present in the room. If Merlin focused he could pick up on the contents of a few conversations, but he opted to keep his ears to himself, standing by Guinevere's side and aiding her in any way he could, wether it be to refill her cup, or gently nudge her in order to help her stay awake and alert. Occasionally he knew names that she had forgotten, and he discreetly reminded her of them. Much like he had done for Arthur, when he had still been with them. There were a few individuals who made attempts at courting Guinevere, rather tasteless attempts, radiating with their lust for power. However, they were all turned down in a fashion which allowed the men to leave the situation with their dignity intact. Guinevere had a way with her words, and Merlin found himself admiring her for her ability to remain calm and collected in these situations.

The night drew to an end, and Guinevere retired to her chambers for the night. Merlin took this opportunity to speak with Gaius regarding his plan of heading back to Ealdor. They sat together at the table in the Physician's chambers, as Merlin explained his desire to head back to Ealdor, whilst offering reassurance that he would return once the time was right. It was dark outside at this point, but again the people had gathered in the courtyard with candles. He had wondered how many days they would do this before they felt that they had paid enough respect to their late King.

"I'll be back, Gaius. I know both you and Guinevere would hardly last a week without me." Merlin finished after relaying his explanation to his Guardian.

"You have my full support and understanding, Merlin. I am sad to see you go, but you will always be welcomed back with open arms, when you feel ready to return. I am certain that Hunnith would be overjoyed to see her son after so long. I've been meaning to send her a letter, actually. If you would be so kind as to take it with you." Gaius spoke in response.

"I'll bring it with me, no problem in that."

"Thank you, Merlin. You should go rest now. You have a long journey tomorrow."

As Merlin returned to his room for the night, he spent a short while packing his clothing and some of his possessions in preparation of the journey home. He would leave before the Coronation took place, but he would get up early in order to say proper goodbyes before his departure.

When he drifted off to sleep, he dreamt of the good times he had in Camelot, finding rest and comfort in his sleep.

**One chapter left! It may be divided into two posts, but I may cram it all into one large chapter. We will see what I end up doing! Also, we have over 1000 views on this story! It's truly remarkable! Thank you all so much for reading this far, and I hope you'll enjoy the last chapter of this story.**