So my first night in my – excuse me, our – new apartment wasn't what I thought it'd be. I thought we'd christen our new bed, pass out from all our passionate, steamy, sweaty, utterly orgasmic lovemaking, and wake up to do the whole thing again. Several, several, several times. Several.

But no.

Here I am, half-naked in bed for the completely wrong reasons. It was so fucking hot and I didn't want to go out into the hallway to fix the thermostat because I didn't want to potentially run into Brittany. I'm sweating like a bitch in this cast too. Shit, it's going to smell horrible when I get it off. I actually gag a little at that thought.

"Arhhhhhh!" I petulantly flail about on my bed but then stop when I realize I'm too old to be doing that.

What am I supposed to do? What am I supposed to say to her? I went out for a breather because I didn't want to stupidly take out my unwarranted behavior on Brittany and she insinuates that I cheated on her! It's not fair. How do people do this relationship shit all the time? How does this make sense? People are fucking masochists. Sorry, people in relationships are masochists.

She said we might as well live together because it'll happen eventually. Sorry for thinking I was going to live with my girlfriend instead of a roommate.

My phone's alarm goes off. I have a class today. Fun. No really, it's fun. Science is fun and cue the Bill Nye the Science Guy music...

I took my time getting dressed but best believe I hauled ass leaving the apartment. Which is stupid because Brittany has to teach an early class today so I didn't even need to try to avoid her. But, wouldn't that mean that she's actually avoiding me? Why is SHE avoiding ME? I didn't mislead her. I didn't get her hopes up. I didn't hurt her feelings.

But, whatever. I'm almost in class anyway and I don't need to be distracted with blue – eyed beauties.

/

Class was interesting as always and that was considering that I was only half listening. That's fine though. It'll give me another pretense to avoid my new roommate. I'm walking home and I can just feel the scowl on my face. I need to stop doing that because I just don't have botox in my budget.

Before I go home I stop at my churro stand and buy a couple of pick-me-ups. They didn't even last the walk back to the apartment.

I stand in front of the door, playing with the keys in my hand. Fuck. I know she's there because I can here her moving about. Unless it's a burglar. Hopefully it's a burglar. I'm from Lima Heights, I know how to deal with those assholes. I don't know how to deal with the woman I'm falling love with.

I exhale and finally unlock the door.

I'm instantly met with Brittany. Well, not Brittany but her scent. Her beautiful, beautiful smell. And I just weirded myself out. What is it with me and smells today.

"Hey." I turn to my right, to see Brittany standing in the kitchen. Her shoulders are slumped and her eyes are sad.

"What happened? Did someone fuck with you at work?" I drop my bag and I'm almost out the door, to go find out what happened to her, when I feel her clutch my bicep. I look down at her hand and then her, with a confused look.

"I missed you." she tells me. And I feel bad but do I have a reason to feel bad? Am I being selfish?

"You left without saying bye this morning. You didn't text me in class like you always do." I shrug. She doesn't say anything and I sure as hell don't know what to say. "Are you hungry?"

She shrugs. "Sit. I'll make you a sandwich." She sits and I wash my hands so I can get to work and make her a sandwich.

"Some guy puked in class." she blurts while I make her a sanwhich.

"That's normal. That's his own physiological way of letting it be know that he sucks."

She giggles and I swoon.

I place the sandwich in front of her with a glass of chocolate milk. I reach over to the drawer next to the fridge and grab her a crazy straw. She loves those. Whenever she uses them, she gets all cross-eyed trying to follow whatever she's drinking. Can we say adorable?

"You're not going to eat?" She asks me when she sees that I didn't make one for myself.

I pat my stomach and I get a little nostalgic thinking about the few, or dozen whatever, churros I had on the way here. "No. I already ate."

She drops her sandwich and tries to scowl at me. "Did you fucking go to Hooters to see that adulterous slut?"

Whoa. Stop.

"What. The. Fuck. No! I went to the churro stand three blocks down. And she's not an adulterous slut! Wait, actually, I don't know her like that, she could be a slut but she definitely did not slut it up with me. I'm taken, Brittany!" I slap my hand on the counter. She doesn't even flinch. But I flinch because I slammed the wrong hand down.

"How can you fucking say that? I saw her number on your wrist. I'm not a fucking idiot, I know what that means."

I don't say anything. I stomp toward the front door where I left my purse. I pull out my phone and give it to her. "Read the conversation."

She snatches the phone from my hands. Why is she mad? Don't worry, once she reads how much I fucking bragged about my beautiful girlfriend and how I can't wait to marry her and I even fucking asked about the marriage process here dealing with same-sex couples.

She eventually turns over the phone to me. "I'm sorry." She frowns and sits on the couch. I follow her because this is getting ridiculous.

"Did you really think I'd do that? To you? Of all people?" I'm not even mad anymore. I'm...defeated? I don't know, I've never been in this position before.

"Why wouldn't you?"

"Because I have you. This perfect, perfect woman of my own, why would I mess that up?"

She doesn't say anything. "You've been weird since we moved in. I figured it had something to do with her. Or anyone else. Look at you, it wouldn't be hard for you to find someone else."

I scoff. "I've been 'weird' because it turns out that I didn't move in with my girlfriend, but that I moved in with another roommate. That's not really what I had in mind."

"That's why you've been upset?"

"What other reason would I have to be upset?"

She doesn't say anything. Again. "So, move in with me."

"No. I already assumed we were together and you wouldn't have asked me if I hadn't brought it up. I don't want your pity 'move in with me.'"

"Fine. I'll ask again tomorrow."

"Don't." I bite back. "I don't understand why you just didn't move my stuff into your room in the first place."

Then she starts with some spiel about how it's too fast but it's obviously bullshit because everything we've done thus far has been too far so why would this be different. I'll deal with a lot shit especially when it concerns Brittany but I can't do anything about her not being honest with me. I can't force someone to tell me the truth. Well, I can but I would really rather not beat it out of Brittany.

Eventually I tell her that it's fine and that she shouldn't worry about it but now I'm in a mood and don't know how to not be in it.

/

I cannot believe this.

It's been two, catch it, TWO weeks and things are still awkward between us. I thought the honeymoon phase was suppose to last longer than this?

I'm probably being petty but I think I've earned the right to be petty. Haven't I? She still asks me to move into her room every day but it doesn't feel right. It feels fucking forced.

/

I just walked out of the bathroom after having just taken a shower and I totally forgot my robe because I'm still forgetting the bag for my cast.

I bump into Brittany.

"Sorry, Britt." I tell her.

"Move in with me." She says as she shrugs her shoulders.

This is how she asks? I just walk past her and she says nothing.

/

I totally needed a fucking glass of water or something because I had a coughing fit. I deserved it because I shouldn't been having multiple chocolate bars in the middle of the night. I get to the kitchen but don't turn on the light because I don't want the light to bother Brittany, she's surprisingly a light sleeper.

I open the fridge and the tiny little fridge lets me see Brittany sitting on the counter next to the fridge. Scared the shit out of me. If this was a few years ago, having just moved out of LHA, I woulda' taken a swing out of her But now, the tiny bulb lighting her face up as if she's in a Rob Zombie flick, sends me into another coughing fit.

"Why the fuck are you being so creepy right now?" I ask. But it probably sounded more like: Why, COUGH, the fuck, GASPS FOR AIR, are you being, CHOKING NOISE, so creepy right now?

"Because I want you to move in with me."

/

I made Tina come over. No, I literally dragged her out of her apartment and walked her over here. I kept a kungfu grip on her hand the entire time. And the entire time she kept bitching that she didn't have a bra on. Bitch, please. Like she has anything that needs support anyway. I told her Betty Friedan would be proud of her after I told her she was flat-chested and called her names. What? I said Betty would be proud of her, not me.

"Tina! I miss her!"

"I don't understand how you can miss her. She's literally five yards away." She says as she blows on her nail polish.

She doesn't understand. "That isn't MY Britt. My Britt understands everything there is to understand about. THAT Britt sits in the dark at midnight waiting for me to get a drink." I ignore Tina's "what the fuck?" because I don't know, wtf.

"Maybe you should just pretend it didn't happen. I mean, you're willing to forget it, right?"

"YES. I'll do anything. Especially since my midterms are coming up. I don't need the added stress." I rub my forehead and remember that I have a lab due as well.

"So, just move your shit into her room and pretend it never happened."

"Eureka!"

/

An entire two hours later, all of my stuff has been officially moved into our new room. I ask Miss Bangkok if I can treat her to some Korean Barbeque. She tells me that I'm racist but I tell her to shut the fuck up because they have free delivery.

I order anyway and we eat. She tells me about some new guy she met, yadda, yadda, yadda, Asian Ab fetish. I decide it could be a worse fetish and tell her to always use protection. Brittany will get here in a little bit so I kick her out. But not before I throw a hoodie her way because the people of this city do not need to see Tina's tits just hanging around.

I shower and take my time getting ready. I put on my shortest sleep short and my tight sleep shirt before sexily spreading myself over her bed. But not too sexy to the point where it's trashy. I may be a lot of things but trashy is not one of them. I look over to Britt's Woody Wood Pecker alarm clock, it's nine o'clock. She'll be here in about fifteen minutes.

That's cool. I hurry to the kitchen and eat a couple of mini eclairs I bought the other day. I don't even care that they have about a thousand calories each. Hopefully tonight goes well, and by well I mean, not awkward at all, and soon I'll have a different work out. A more enjoyable work out. And by "enjoyable" I mean, I'm going to have sex with Brittany.

I catch the time on the microwave.

"Holy shit. I've been eating mini eclairs for 20 minutes." I say to myself and I wonder on how to hide the evidence. I don't see any other logical solution so I obviously eat the rest and throw the container away. Duh.

I drink some water and go back to bed. Huh. Brittany's about 30 minutes late. She probably got stuck teaching. I check my phone because she usually tells me when she's going to be late but this time, nothing.

She's probably mad at me now. Hopefully she likes this surprise though. I check my instagram to kill time. Rachel always posts the fuuniest things. She really is my ride or die, though. I think I follow too many "animals of IG" though. Naw, who am I kidding these animals are just sooo cute!

And that's the last thing I remember before I hear stumbling and "Spice up Your Life" being sang.

I lift my head up and squint my eyes in the dark, "Britt?" I ask groggily before I sit up and turn on the lamp on my side. She looks like a hot mess. Her make up is all smeared, her hair is all matted and sweaty, and her dress is all mess up. Shit, my girlfriend is beautiful. But then I look behind her and her Woody Wood Pecker clock. It's one o'clock.

"Sanny? What are you doing here?"

I'm a little upset but I really shouldn't be because I'm not her keeper and if she wants to go out, she can. "I live here, Britt-Britt."

"But this is my room?" She tilts her head in confusion.

This is it, my time to shine. "No, it's our room."

It takes a second, she has been drinking, but it finally hits. Her face lights up, "You said yes?!" I nod. She tosses herself at me and kisses me all over my face before finally kissing my lips. Damn, how I went so long without these lips is beyond me. We finally run out of breath and she settles completely on top of me. She has this choke hold on me but I really am not complaining. "I'm glad you said yes, Sanny. I don't want you to get tired of me, you know. Not when I just got you. I promise I won't bore you." She says before she finally nods off.

I think I understand now. I mean, I don't understand why she didn't tell me but I do understand. I kiss the top of her head and let myself finally go to sleep. Maybe this will be the first night I get a full night's rest in weeks.