CHAPTER 13

A few days later, I was still battling with the thought of forgiving Troy and actually letting him have his chance. But really, have a chance in what? I didn't know, but I think I kind of let the girls' advice get in my head. Maybe Troy wasn't that much of a bad guy as I put it.

But still, the boys annoyed and picked at us at times, but I had to say that it was at a low rant, lower that it had been since I got to East High. So maybe they were beginning to change? But who knows?

Can you ever expect boys to change? Won't they always stay what they are: boys?

And with that state of mind I hopped into the van that had started picking me up since I got into the teen pregnancy program. My baby was growing up, but my belly was still not swollen much, which was great, because I didn't want it to show and be the center of attention. I wondered if any of the girls in the program had to go through humiliation for the rest of their school year.

Thing is, I started to just develop something. I don't exactly know what it is, but I have this apprehension this excitement building in me everyday more at the conception of being a mother.

It's just so overwhelming and stuff. The thing is, right now I'm still not sure if I'll be keeping the baby or giving it up for abortion. I'm sure her or his dad wouldn't mind what I did, seeing as he rejected me the day I told him all about this.

I think that's what I was more afraid of. Maybe that's why I wasn't able to let Troy in yet, seeing the way he has been treating me and everyone even if we kissed. TWICE.

I got to admit thought that It was a pretty good feeling, and I just can't help myself from feeling like fireworks were taking place in me, whenever he touches or kisses me.

It actually feels…great!

And that's one other thing that frightens me.

What if I was falling for him? What would happen then?

Was that little voice in my head right? Was that little voice that was telling me to just move away from him for the sake of my heart right?

What if I was rejected and left alone?

What if I had to go through this whole thing all over again?

No, I couldn't. I can't let him in my life and into my heart.

'The heart is the window to the soul. Mine is pretty easy to look into, but getting in is another story'…that was always what I told myself…but looked what happened with Mark?

Hadn't he been the jerk that was let into my heart and that broke it?

Would Troy do the same?

But the thing is, why was I even thinking about him like that? Why was I even thinking about him being my boyfriend? Couldn't I have a guy friend?

That would be fine right? He would not be able to break my heart that bad because he wouldn't have a big impact in it.

Even if a lot of people though that people from the opposite sex couldn't stay friend long enough to not fall for each other, I don't think I really have a choice.

It's either let him in or not. And when he gets in, there's only one door open: friendship.

I sat down in my usual seat, a little bit closer this time to the rocking chair near the place where the babies played with their blocks.

That little girl again got my attention. That same small blonde girl that was in the corner, dressed in a cute flowery soft pink dress, playing with her blocks.

She had caught my attention since the day I got here, but not enough for me to meet her mother. She always seemed so distant thought. And …thoughtful. Could that be possible for a child this young? Or Was It just me imagining things? Probably.

Then, later on, while we were still in homeroom, I saw her mom. She was sitting on the rocking chair, watching her softly and I think that the little girl felt her mom's presence in the room because she looked up from the pile she was making and smiled and then, putting her blocks away, she helped herself up with her hands and managed to walk there, and I smiled the whole time because even if she nearly fell at first, she somewhat started walking perfectly, gracefully.

I really must had been imagining that, maybe this whole thing was influenced by me wanting my child to do the same with me…but who knows?

But just that little moment made my heart twitch in excitement. I really wanted this baby!

After a while of watching them interact with each other, the little girl cried out for feeding and just in the most secretive way, the teenager opened up her blouse and the next thing I knew the girl was sucking in.

It was just amazing and it was the very first time I saw it naturally. Most of the girls around hadn't had enough milk for constant feeding and so had to give their babies milk from the bottle already.

My eyes whelmed up at the sight, and I found myself anticipating my turn, wanting for my time to arrive impatiently, and here the thought of keeping my baby came back again.

My mom and I hadn't talked about this like everything else had been discussed. She just proposed to take care of the baby for me while I finished high school and from there, I could decide what to do. But she said she was going to just be there for me with the baby whatever happened, and so I counted on that.

Nothing would separate me from my child, but I could give her up for adoption, just the time that I finish college and get a job and take care of her or him when I'm ready.

Couldn't I do that?

I think I wasn't the only mom watching that blonde girl on that day. It was just an amazing sight and I could hear her humming to her child while drawing small circle on her small cheek.

I could almost grasp the peace of that moment. It looked so amazing from my point of view, so I couldn't imagine how overwhelming it must be for her mother.

And suddenly, like feeling my gaze towards her direction, I saw the blonde furrow her brow and tighten her hold around the kid when she turned to me, and the child let out a little cry in the sudden movement and the moment that her brown eyes were out of mine, love came back on her face, and she smiled at her daughter reassuringly.

I quickly looked away, not wanting to disturb them any further.

And when I turned to face the teacher, the girl I had seen in the gym with her nose deep into her book was staring at us. And when she saw me looking at her, she turned around again, like she was embarrassed or something.

But after that period, I walked up to her, determined to have more than just eye conversation with her.

Her name was Kelsi. She was really shy and didn't tell me anything when I talked to her at first, like she was oblivious of the fact that I was standing right next to her and that I was actually talking to her.

But then, I think she realized that I wasn't going to eat her alive or anything and she smiled and told me her name in a strong voice. One that I wouldn't expect from someone who seems so small, sad and timid, so…vulnerable.

She was pregnant, which explained why she didn't have kids sleeping or being fed in her arms.

Six Months she said. And I just couldn't believe it because she looked anything than six months pregnant!

And so I just envied her because I wanted to just be just like her, that everyone was oblivious that she was pregnant.

I had no other class with her except for gym session and I asked her who that blonde girl with the deep brunet skin baby was and she seemed hesitant to tell me what she knew.

We were walking towards her next class, which was close to mine and I smiled reassuringly and with a small voice, she said:

"Sharpay Evans. Not everyone know that she has a baby, and I think that she intends on keeping it that way, so watch out on not telling anyone okay?"

Her affirmation was strong and clear and I nodded my head as we separated and she entered her next class. I watched as she made her way through the class, unnoticed and right there two desk before her, sat the Sharpay Evans.

I gulped down as she looked at me, her eyebrows almost touching, and her jaw clenched. It was like she was sending furious signals for me to back-off and somehow I understood and just walked away, and I was strangely somehow, somewhat…scared.

I think it was about time that I introduced the characters you guys are more familiar with and so I hope that you all are pleased with what is happening right now. And it was a little bit of a filler, so yeah, I hope you are all pleased.

Review please?

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God Bless.

Tell me what you want to see in the next chapters and you might see that happening!