Silence filled the air on the bumpy car ride home. It was a deafening quiet and it was driving me absolutely crazy but I didn't want to be the first to speak so I sucked it up and waited in the awkwardness.
"Tell me what just happened back there?" Randy asked taking his eyes off the road momentarily to look at me.
I stopped watching the trees rushing by so I could meet his gaze. "What do you mean?" I asked him.
"You know…what happened between us…" He said looking oddly uncomfortable.
"You mean your parents didn't have this conversation with you? Ok. Well…when a man and a woman love each other…."
"That's not what I meant." He said gluing his hands firmly to the wheel, his eyes never leaving the road. "I mean…you and me, did we just?"
"Yup!" I responded with a chipper smile.
"Wow. It's so weird."
"How so?" I asked.
"Well you're my best friend…"
"And?"
"So is John, it's kind of like I was kissing him in some weird way..."
"Hey!" I yelled smacking him across the chest. I was somewhat insulted to be compared to his beer swilling, penis owning, and not to mention male friend.
"But in a hot sexy female sort of way…"
"Weird…but I'll take it." I said running my hand through his short hair.
"So are you my girlfriend?" He asked.
"If that's what you want me to be." I said smiling. I couldn't believe this was all really happening.
I flopped my head back and rested it against the headrest as I dwelled in my own thoughts. I shut my eyes and pretended I was all alone just me and my brain. I thought about everything…what I was going to do about this dad situation and about what john was going to say when he found out about Randy and me. Sure, John said that he knew that I would always want Randy, but could he accept it now that I had him.
Then there was dad. I had yet to rid him of that parasite Michelle. I had stopped at nothing to try and scare her away but alas it seemed it wasn't enough. Maybe I was loosing my touch or maybe I had fell behind because of my own troubles but one thing was for sure, this was FAR from over.
The car stopped and Randy shook me awake I smiled at him and rubbed my eyes checking the time. I had slept the whole way home.
"Why didn't you wake me?" I asked.
Randy didn't answer; he just smiled and kissed me lightly. "Good morning."
"Good morning." I repeated.
I hoped that this was the start of many other mornings of waking up to Randy beside me. I swung one leg out of the car before the other one followed. I reached up and stretched and that was when I spotted him.
John looked at me and turned away, hurt filling his gorgeous baby blues.
"John!" I yelled but he didn't even look back. I don't blame him really, this morning I was his girlfriend and now I was with his best friend. It's a fucked up world we live in and as depressing as it is; I'm part of it.
Randy lightly touched my shoulder. "Are you ok?" He asked.
"It's not me I'm worried about." I replied.
"He'll come around, after all you said your self he told you to come after me." Randy said watching the door of the building slam shut and John disappear behind it.
"Ya, but I guess he didn't know if you'd feel the same. As much as he wanted to be I don't think he was ready to see all of this, especially so soon ya know?"
He leaned in and gently brushed his lips against mine. "You're a wonderful person." He whispered.
"Well I don't feel so wonderful"