Swearing.
"S***!"
"STEVE!"
Several pairs of eyes widened and stared up at a very-red faced and angry-looking Steve struggling with the toaster. (He had burned his fingers. Again.) Steve's own eyes widened and he raised his hand in front of his mouth.
"I…I didn't just say what you think I said."
"No, you said – "
"I know you think you heard me say…something vulgar, but, I can assure you, that is not what I said."
"I didn't even know he was capable of swearing."
"I said, ah." Steve stopped talking and pressed his lips into a line. He deliberately stared at the counter.
Tony grinned widely. "Can you believe that we were all in here to hear you say that? Just my luck. You lose, Barton!" Clint groaned and dropped his head into his hands while Natasha pulled a bill from his wallet. Bruce shifted in his seat and also dropped a nice, new, $20 bill on the table in front of Tony. From his post in the kitchen, Steve looked up and gaped.
"You guys were…betting on me?" he asked. Tony grunted.
"Don't look so shocked, you make bets all the time." The bills slid into his pocket and Clint let out another groan.
"Yeah, but – not about my teammates!" Oh, his face was definitely red now.
Bruce walked over to Steve and took the toaster-issue into his own hands. "Then what else are we supposed to bet on?" he asked, amused. "There's lots of variables involved." Steve pouted his lips.
"But that's terrible!"
Clint flopped onto the table top. "Tell me about it," he said, voice muffled by where his face was buried in his arms.
"You can't keep that money," Steve said, turning to Tony. "That was a mean bet, and it isn't fair."
Tony raised his eyebrow. "I'm keeping the money, Cap, whether you think it was mean or not. You're the one who swore at a toaster." Steve stared at him for a good few minutes. His lips pursed slightly and his eyebrows furrowed just a tad in the center. It was tense, to say the least. Finally, he stood up and made his way around the table, calm as all get-out. He paused next to Tony's chair and took a deep breath.
"Well," he said, "how much do you win for this?" He turned and looked Tony in the eye.
"F*** off, Iron Man."
And he walked out of the kitchen.
Clint whooped and took back his money, plus some.
Errmmm, yep. Asterisks because reasons, though I dunno if it actually makes it any better. Also, now I have this mental image of Steve actually swearing in asterisks, though, which is…well, it's actually kind of hilarious. I'm trying to keep up with this as best I can, but sometimes inspiration fails to hit. Also because Supernatural. Thank you to all my readers, reviewers, and followers!