Chapter 13:

2 + 2

I reached a point where I was certain, without a doubt at all, that I'd fully and completely lost my mind. It would have been more comforting for me to believe that I was still that other girl, from that other world, that I was in a coma experiencing this elaborate hallucination and that none of it was real.

A desperate hope that everything I was experiencing wasn't real, that the stress, confusion, and fear weren't real. It would have made it easier to cope, easier to play along, right?

The pain in my mouth when I bit my tongue, that was real, too real. Fingernails digging into my palm, the itch and ache of my broken arm in the cast, the rough feeling of the textured throttle lever. No, it was all too real.

The rocking of the aircraft, the buffeting of the wind, the feeling of the G forces, sound of my own voice? All the things that dreams got wrong, things that would tip you off, make you realize you were asleep. I'd been able to lucid dream before, knew enough to notice.

I sighed and eased back on the throttle, blinked my eyes and shook my head. Pay attention to one thing at a time Rei, don't get lose in thoughts, don't lament what wasn't and what can't be, fly the plane. I licked my bottom lip and turned my head to the side of the canopy. Raptor on my right, there was another still on my left. Still in formation.

They hadn't ordered me to disarm, hadn't treated me like I'd disobeyed orders, but then... maybe I didn't have to obey them anyway, they weren't in any chain of command that I was part of, were they? No, Nerv authority superseded their own, at least in matters where I was concerned.

I toggled the gear down, deployed flaps, and eased back on the throttle some more. Runway in sight, altitude dropping, airspeed dropping. Formation landing, because why not right? I'd have preferred to come in solo, but Becket had insisted.

The airbase though, I remembered it, from those memories I was given. She'd been here before, I hadn't. It looked different than I remembered. Fewer buildings, lots of craters. There'd been a battle here, but it didn't look fresh.

I eased back on the stick as we crossed the runway threshold. Twenty, ten, touchdown. "and... boards out, brakes on..." I muttered under my breath as I throttled down to idle. The g-forces from the deceleration pressed me against my harness, but nothing I could deal with.

My eyes scanned the runway in front of me. As the plane on the left, I would take the taxiway first, and Becket would follow, but that meant I had to find it first.

Red. A big red head.

I blinked, turned my head to the side, between two of the hangers, under a camo tarp, there was red paint, a lot of red paint. I'd caught it out of the corner of my eye, and having looked at it, paled. Unit Two was here, for some reason. Was it that time already? The fleet was already on their way to Japan, how was Unit Two supposed to get to Japan from here? What was it even doing here? More IPEA shenanigans or something else?

My right hand clenched on the stick as I stepped into the left rudder. If Two was here, that meant the pilot was close by right? Was that why they'd directed us here, or was that just a happy coincidence? Was this the reason for the intercept before? They couldn't hit the base to take out the Evangelion, so they figured they'd do the next best and take out one of the pilots?

No, that didn't make sense, they'd only have decommissioned one pilot, and not the one for this unit either.

I steered the jet over into parking as a member of the ground crew waved me in, a fuel truck and a utility truck with the Nerv fig leaf were waiting for me.

"Moment of truth..." I muttered to Misato as we rolled to a stop, "Nerv's here, time to face the music."

"I'm sure it'll be fine Rei."

xxx

The thick nostalgic scent of the jet fuel mingled with the sweet coppery scent of the LCL in a way that almost made me vomit, and I still couldn't keep the grin off my face despite that. Unit Two, in the flesh, right in front of me. It was cool. I mean, aesthetically, Two looked awesome. The fact that I wasn't the only game in town made things even sweeter.

You never appreciate how comfortable that eighty meter engine of destruction made you feel until you no longer have it by your side and ready to go.

"Just when I was getting used to the cold," Misato complained, "we had to go and ruin it by heading south."

"Misato, do you ever feel like you've gotten way too Jaded?" I asked with a raised eyebrow. I jerked my head towards the gigantic leg of Unit Two over to our left. "I mean, we're standing next to an eighty meter biomech that can kill space monsters, while standing in the middle of a military base, and we just got out of a fighter jet. The future is now and you're complaining about the heat."

"It's hot out, it's uncomfortable and my legs hurt from being stuck in that cockpit for hours, I think I'm allowed to vent a little, Rei." she replied with a nonchalant shrug as she turned to walk towards a small portable building set up alongside a row of Nerv-marked crates.

"Oh come on Misato, where's your sense of wonder?"

"It's wondering where our contact is, and if this building has air conditioning. You're welcome to join me."

I rolled my eyes and followed her towards the door. The building was a sort of tan corrugated sheet metal rectangle, like the kind that they moved around on a flatbed trailer behind a semi truck. No windows, one door, and an air conditioner sticking out of the side of it.

Well, it was better than boiling in my own sweat. I couldn't exactly just sit in the Viper with the engine running and the air conditioner on, could I? I could not.

Although the mental image of sitting in a fighter jet idling in the parking lot of a 7-11 while Misato went inside for snacks was a delightfully hilarious one.

I shook my head and reached into the zippered pocket on the right leg of my flight suit, found what I was looking for, and stepped through the door and into the cold rush of air conditioning. I picked at the wrapper as my eyes adjusted to the room, shapes quickly shifted into focus and-

Red.

I bit down on the end of the granola bar and crunched it slowly between my teeth as my eyes drifted from Red and over to Misato, and then back again. Plug suit, nerve clips. Yep, Eva pilot. "So, Unit Two looks pretty red, eh Red?" I asked as I crunched another chunk off the snack bar.

The girl sneered at me, her face bordering between disgust and dismissal, "Rei Ikari I presume? Your reputation precedes you. Shouldn't you be in Japan, protecting everyone from Angel attacks? Reckless!"

I crunched down on the granola and stared at the person in front of me, the girl. My age, little slimmer figure, smaller chest. I could take pride in my superiority in that regard anyway.

I shrugged stared at her blankly, "Well, I did kill an Angel with a fighter jet, so there's that."

She snorted and laughed, "Well, you might be a rookie Evangelion pilot, but… I suppose I do have to give you that one, even if you had help."

Woah, crazy girl, totally shifting gears like that? What was she playing at? Testing me or out of her mind?

"What Asuka is trying to say," Misato started with a harsh look at the other girl, "is that she's pleased to meet you and is glad that we'll be traveling together back to Japan, and now that we're here we can get ready to leave, right?"

"Oh yeah totally that," Asuka replied, looking over at me with… amusement? "Let's go with that. California was boring me anyway."

I pushed the rest of the bar into my mouth and crunched down. It wasn't perfect by any means, not a steak, or even a hamburger, in terms of satisfaction. But, it took the edge off, and the crunchiness was satisfying.

I turned my eyes to Misato, then shrugged. This chance meeting, if it really was chance, wasn't really my thing. The flight over, the stress from that, the night before? I was more than a little exhausted, physically and emotionally and, well…

I dropped the wrapper on the table and turned around for the door and made it three steps when I heard something from outside, a sort of metallic squeal, and the roar of a diesel engine. My hand touched the door handle, and I shoved it open for a quick look outside.

My eyes took a few seconds to adjust to the brightness, then I saw the source of that diesel engine sound; an eight by eight boom truck was driving past, and my F-2 was hanging off the boom. "Well, that's different..."

I shook my head and stepped backwards back into the room, and turned around, licked my bottom lip. "Misato, some people are stealing our jet."

I almost couldn't believe it, not necessarily that the jet would be moved, that wasn't difficult to comprehend. No, that they were using a crane to do it? What the hell was the point of that? I looked out ahead of the truck, down the tarmac, towards the… oh.

"Rei? Who's doing what?" I heard Misato's footsteps approaching from behind on the steel floor, click clack. I heard, but I couldn't really spare the attention to care.

At the far end of the pair of parallel runways that ran the length of the airbase, and finally without the camouflage netting covering it, I witnessed the largest aircraft that I had ever seen in my life, possibly the largest that had ever been built. A twin boom flying wing with an elevated cavity along the center-line, more engines than I could count, and a large aerodynamic pod with two huge red feet sticking out of it.

The square cube law wasn't even a polite suggestion, it was bullshit.

That this thing could even pretend to fly, let alone fly with an Evangelion slung under it? The rational human being inside me couldn't fathom this thing flying without snapping itself in half, and the pilot in me wanted hands on throttle and stick.

Nothing like an F-2 or an F-16 though, it probably flew like a fright train. Fast by necessity and with a turning radius the size of Montana.

...were they going to load my jet onto that thing?

"I see you've noticed my ride. Pretty cool huh?"

My eyebrow twitched and I looked over towards the sound of the voice. Asuka was peeking out of the door next to me and she had a smug smirk plastered on her face.

"Eh… Mine's faster."

"Mine is bigger," She growled back.

I felt a hand on my shoulder and heard the chuckle behind me, "Girls, you're both pretty. If you're done bickering, I've got to make some calls."

I shrugged and waved my hand, "Don't worry about it Misato, I'm fine. In fact, I'm going to go check out that big plane."

"Well, take Asuka with you then. You girls are going to need to learn to get along with each other. I wouldn't want to have to turn the plane around half way to Japan."

xxx

Jet fuel, hydraulic fluid, smoke, and the acrid stench of a plasma arc. The kind of things that made a girl feel right at home. Well, made me feel at home anyway. Asuka probably wouldn't agree, but what did she know anyway?

The plane, this Evangelion transport, was bigger than I had imagined, at a distance it was really hard to get a handle on the scale of the thing. A gigantic flying wing with a cavity underneath it to hold the Eva, that much I had seen from the other end of the airfield, but once I got up close I figured out exactly where they were putting my plane.

The thing had an elevator on it, and it was this elevator that we took from the tarmac up to the small cargo bay situated above the Evangelion docking equipment. The compartment was expansive, you could probably have fit half a squadron of fighter jets and the requisite support vehicles and equipment in it, with room to spare.

I licked my lip and looked around the room, workers were almost frantically scurrying about, running through checklists or maintenance work. A few people were inspecting the shipping containers that took up a full half of the bay; likely equipment for the Evangelion slung underneath.

"So, how did you break your arm?"

I froze at the sound of the voice, I'd been lost in my thoughts. I looked over at Asuka, then back to my left arm. I rolled it over and worked my fingers. It still itched, but I'd managed to stop thinking about it so much lately, with everything else going on.

"I'm sure you've read the after action report," I said simply and looked away, towards the open hatch that the F-2 was being loaded in through. Why would she care? We just met and our first interactions weren't exactly full of love.

"I read the reports, but… I wanted to hear it from the horse's mouth," She answered with a non-committal shrug. Right, you want to hear me say it… because? Fine.

"I cracked it during a plug ejection, and broke it when I forced the hatch release on Ayanami's entry-plug. She was okay though, so it all worked out okay in the end," I explained, absently clenching my left hand into a fist.

"Well, okay except that your broke your arm huh?" She answered back. I couldn't read a motive in her voice, no inflection that would give away exactly what it was she was trying to get at. She wasn't being flat, not like Ayanami, she just sounded… bored?

I shook my head, "I won't let anyone get hurt trying to protect me, if I can help it. I think… I think she was willing to die to save me, I just wasn't willing to let her go through with it."

"Well aren't you just the heroic soldier," She snipped.

I felt the cast material cracking in my hand as I clenched, "N-no, that's not it at all," I ground out through grit teeth, "nobody dies for me, not if I can help it. I haven't done anything to earn that kind of loyalty."

I relaxed a little and turned to her. All those memories coming back, now, in front of her? "I don't think… That I could live with the guilt."

"But you're okay killing yourself to save other people? That's a bit hypocritical don't you think, Ikari?" She pressed, she leaned towards me, invaded my space a little. I guessed she was trying to play on the Japanese propensity to avoid physical contact?

I signed and leaned against a crate and looked up at the ceiling, "Well… it wouldn't be the first time. You might be right Asuka."

"You take the fun out of it when you just agree with me, you know that right?" She said with a smirk as she leaned next to me, she seemed relaxed. Was she trying to piss me of or just figure out my limits?

"So," I asked, looking over her plugsuit-clad form. I felt a blush rise on my cheeks a little as my eyes traced along her- "eh, so why are you wearing that anyway? Just want the world to know you're an Eva pilot? Is that why you do this?"

She curled down the corner of her lip and looked into the distance, "I guess you could say that. Piloting Evangelion is my way of telling the world I'm important. It's something I'm good at, so why wouldn't I want everyone to know how great I am, right?"

I stared into the palm of my right hand and frowned, "I guess that's as good a reason as any..." I trailed off. I was really looking at Asuka like this? With a blush and wandering eyes? I just met her, pretty sure I didn't really like her…

"So what about you?" She asked and leaned forward, away from the crate, and turned to face me. "What makes you pilot Eva?"

I stared back down into my hand and clenched it into a fist. What was the reason? The one I'd been telling myself? "Because I can. It's… an obligation, I guess. I can protect people, and because I have the ability, I have the obligation to fight. I can't just stand by and do nothing if there's something I can do. Hell, when I didn't have an Evangelion I stole a fighter jet and went five rounds with an Angel."

"So, you do think you're a hero eh, Ikari?" She prodded with a smirk.

I laughed and shook my head, "No, just stupid, but I guess there really isn't that much of a difference, huh?"

"Hah, stupid Ikari. I kinda like the way that sounds," She laughed, and my blush returned.

Great, that was just what I needed.

"So there you two are. We're leaving soon, non stop to Tokyo-3!" Misato's voice declared exuberantly from behind me, I turned and saw her grinning face and felt something inside me melt.

I blinked, "What about Beckett and his flight?"

"Headed back to Alaska for now, disappointed? Developing a crush?" She singsonged at me.

I frowned at her, "Well, no, but he was pretty cool..."

"Yeah, totally no crush there," Asuka chimed in from the other direction. Great, they're ganging up on me now. What did I do to deserve this anyway?

"Look, one pilot to another, he has cool toys, that's all. It's respect, not a crush!" I protested.

Misato smirked, "Well, if that's not it, maybe there's somebody else you have a crush on, hmmm?"

Target in the center; Pull the switch. I licked my bottom lip and smiled up at her, "Mmm, maybe there is."

"Oh? Is it Asuka? Rei you've only just met her!" She deflected.

Ah, no! My weakness is strong! I must recover, I've got to counter with something-

"I think that's enough of that. We're leaving right? Well we'd better get ready to go, shouldn't we?" Asuka interjected before I could respond to Misato's needling.

I sighed, sure it was teasing, but… as much as I wanted to get back at her, I wanted to tell her that thing that I was pretty sure she at least suspected. Tell her the truth about… well…

"Hey, Earth to Stupid Ikari, we're going. C'mon I'll show you the flight deck," Asuka snapped as she poked me in the shoulder.

Oh, right then, off we go.

The hair on the back of my neck stood up, a shrill tone pierced the relative calm of the cargo bay.

...an air raid siren?