Chapter 13
When Lily saw me she came to me and hugged me tight.
"I'm so sorry."
I nodded and kept walking.
She didn't come after me.
Not that I wanted her to. I just wanted to be alone. I felt dead inside. Was it my fault he died? He was coming to see ME after all.
I needed to see Joe. For some reason he was the only one who could really relate to me. Him and I were the closest ones to him. I didn't see Joe at all.
Did he leave again? My question had been answered when I got home he was sitting at my door.
"What are you doing here? Why weren't you at school?" I asked sitting next to him.
"I just couldn't do it."
His eyes were red.
"I could have really used having you around today. Everywhere I went I saw his face."
I was getting teary eyed.
"I'm sorry. I just couldn't."
"It's okay." I said looking down.
"Was he on his way to see you the night he died?" Joe asked.
"Yeah. He said he wanted to tell me something."
Joe froze next to me.
"What is it?" I asked worried.
Joe stayed silent.
"What is it you're not telling me?"
"Nothing."
"Do you have any idea as to what he was going to tell me?" I asked trying to get him to look me in the eyes.
"I don't know."
"Fine. Don't tell me." I said getting up and opening my door.
"Wait." He said grabbing my hand.
"What?" I asked.
He pulled me close to him and held me.
"It isn't the right time. But I will tell you at some point."
I had no idea what he was talking about. But I trusted him.
"Okay." I said looking at him.
Nick's been gone for three months now. I still miss him greatly but the pain is manageable.
"Hey Joe." I said walking up to him at school.
For some reason when I looked at him, it seemed as if I was looking at him for the first time. "Hey beautiful."
I smiled.
He had been calling me beautiful, pretty, and just finding little ways to make me smile and feel better about myself.
"Who are those flowers for?" I asked looking at them.
"Actually they are for you." He said handing them to me.
"What are they for?" I asked confused.
"You know senior ball is coming up in a couple weeks and I was wondering if you would want to go with me."
I was shocked.
"I had no idea you were going to ask me."
"Then that means I hid it well."
He seemed really happy.
"Yes you did." I said smiling.
"So what's your answer?"
"Yes."
His smile grew bigger and he lifted me up and twirled me around.
I laughed.
"Why so happy?"
"Because the only girl I wanted to go with said yes."
"Aw I'm happy too. There's no one else I would rather go with."
He looked at me.
I mean really looked at me, the way he used to. I still care deeply about Joe. But when I was with Nick I was happy. He might have been the one. But now that he's gone and Joe's here is this life's cruel way of saying I should be with Joe?
Then Lily walked up.
"Hey guys. Where did you get those flowers Miley?"
"Oh Joe gave them too me."
"Any reason why?"
"He asked me to senior ball." I said with a smile.
"Aw lucky you have a date."
"Don't worry we'll find you someone." I said lightly touching her arm.
"Right."
"Just you wait and see." I said laughing.
If Lily hadn't shown up just then would something have happened?
I pushed my thoughts aside and walked.
"What do you have planned?" Joe asked following.
"You'll see." I said with a grin.
When I got the English that day I walked over to my seat which is next to Oliver.
"Hey Oliver." I said sitting.
"Oh hey Miley."
"So are you going to senior ball?"
He looked nervous.
"If I find a date."
I think he thought I was going to ask him.
"Oh well I think I have the perfect girl in mind for you."
He was silent for a moment.
"Who?"
"My friend Lily."
He looked relived.
"She's great! Pretty, smart, and dateless."
He thought a moment.
"Sure. Why not? Just let me know when I can meet her so we can talk about it."
"Great!"
This was perfect. Now Lily had a date, and he was perfect for her. He was sweet, funny, cute, has blonde hair and athletic. Just her type.
"Lily!" I said when I found her at lunch.
"Hey." she said closing her locker.
"Guess who now has a date to senior ball."
"I already know your going with Joe."
"No not me silly! You!"
"What?" she asked confused.
"I found you the perfect date!"
"Who?"
"His name is Oliver and he's sweet, funny, cute, athletic, and has blonde hair!"
"Oh my gosh! Now way! He sounds perfect for me!"
"I think he is! He wants to meet you so you guys can talk about it and stuff. I'll let you know when that will be."
"Okay awesome!"
"We both have dates this is so exciting!"
"I know! I can't wait!"
"Neither can I!"
This was going to be amazing. We couldn't wait until senior ball.
"You look happy." Joe said as we walked out of school and toward the parking lot.
"I found Lily the perfect date. So now we both have dates."
"Oh awesome! I knew you were up to something." He said laughing.
"And I didn't make it obvious or anything."
"Oh of course not. When do you ever make anything obvious?"
He said making fun of me.
"Meanie!" I said hitting him playfully.
When we reached my car I stood against it and looked at Joe.
He looked back at me. He rested his hand against my car and was hovering over me.
"What are you doing?" I whispered.
His intention was to kiss me.
But then something changed and he backed up.
"Nothing." He said backing away.
I was confused.
"Wait." I said pulling him back to me.
He looked unsure of what I was doing.
"Were you going to do this?" I asked before I pressed my lips against his.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and pressed my body against his. He pushed me back against my car and wrapped his arms around my waist. I loved him with all my heart. After the kiss I just stood in his arms and had him hold me.
"Miley?" He asked.
"Yeah?" I asked looking up at him.
"Do you remember when Nick died and he was coming to your house to tell you something?" "Yeah."
"Well I know what he was coming to tell you." Joe said pulling away from me.
"What was it?" I asked confused.
"He was coming to tell you how I felt about you."
"What?" I asked.
"He told me he knew I was still in love with you so he was going to tell you I think."
"But why would he want to tell me that?"
I didn't know how to feel.
"He said he knew you still loved me too."
How could Nick have known that? I never acting on it.
"I-I-" I stuttered.
"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said anything."
He thought I was hurt. He thought I would be angry at him. I wasn't. Just the opposite. It sounded like something Nick would do. He wanted to make people happy.
Joe was starting to walk away.
"Where are you going?" I asked stopping him.
"I get your mad at me. I'll just leave you alone. We don't have to go to senior ball or be friends anymore."
I slapped him.
"I'm not mad at you! And we are going to senior ball together. But we can't be friends anymore." He looked crushed.
"Then why do you still want to be my date?" He asked confused.
"Because I don't want to be just friends." I said stepping closer to him.
He was silent.
"I want to be more. I love you Joe. I always have been. Always will be."
"I love you too Miley." He said smiling.
I was with Joe again.
When I told Lily she wasn't surprised.
"Finally!" She said when I went over to her house later that night.
"Psh." I said pretending to be offended.
"You guys needed to get back together. It was painful to watch you two give each other the 'I love you but I'm afraid to say anything' look."
"We did not give each other those looks!"
"Uh yeah you did! Like all the time!"
We both laughed. I knew what she meant. It did take us a long time to move forward.
"Okay so maybe we did."
"I hope you guys actually stay together this time." Lily said.
"Hopefully he doesn't cheat, or randomly leave again."
"If he does your not allowed to go back out with him."
She was right. I can't go through this for a third time.
"I know. I can't go through this a third time."
"Good."
"Hey Miley wait up."
Oliver said running after me the next day before school.
"Oh hey. What's up?"
"When can I need Lily?" He asked as we walked.
"How about right now?" I said walking to my locker where she was.
"Hey Miley. Who's this?" Lily asked.
"Lily this is your date to senior ball."
"Hi." He said with that goofy love smile.
He was so into her.
"Hi." She said back with the same goofy smile.
"So I'll just leave you two to talk." I said before walking away.
I was pleased with myself. It was a match made in heaven.
As I was walking I ran into Joe.
"Hey." I said with a smile.
"Hi." He said smiling then kissing me.
We walked down the hall holding hands.
"So how are you this fine morning my love?" He said.
"I am wonderful." I said laughing.
"Wonderful!" He said laughing too.
I just laughed again.
"So where's Lily? Isn't she usually with you in the mornings?"
"Usually but she's currently talking to her soul mate." I said proud.
"Her date to senior ball?"
"Yes."
"So now their soul mates?"
"Yes. He's just her type."
"Alright then." He said laughing at me.
Then I stopped him and looked at him.
"What?" He asked confused.
"Do you have any feelings what so ever for Lily still?" I asked seriously.
"No!" He exclaimed.
"Okay." I said looking away from him.
"Why would you ask that?"
"I just needed to make sure. I don't want you to cheat on me with her again. Or at all."
He cupped my face in his hands.
"I'm not going to mess this up again."
I wanted to believe him.
I'm not saying that Joe is the last boyfriend I'm ever going to have and I want to marry him, I just want this to be the last time with him. No more back and forth.
"I hope so." I said before walking again.
We fell into a comfortable silence.
Then the bell rang.
"I'll see you later." I said before kissing his cheek and walking away.
"So how did you like meeting Oliver?" I asked Lily later in the only class we had together.
"I owe you big time! He's amazing! I think he likes me. We're going to hang out tonight." She said excited.
"I knew you guys would hit it off!"
"I'm so glad you fixed us up!"
I'm glad Lily was happy. She hadn't had a boyfriend since Joe. I mean she went on dates here and there but never any boyfriends. So hopefully this will be the start of something great. It's finally here! Senior ball! Lily and I got drop dead gorgeous dresses that will make our dates mouths drop.
"Are you ready?" I asked before opening the door to let our dates in.
"Yes. This is what we've been waiting for."
I opened the door and as I said the boys' mouths dropped.
"You girls look amazing!"
"Thanks." We both said smiling.
Oliver extended his arm out to Lily and Joe did the same for me.
We were off.
The place where it was being held looked amazing! The theme was masquerade. So everyone was wearing a mask.
As we were dancing I looked over to see how Lily and Oliver were doing but they were gone. I figured they went outside to get some air or something, so I didn't worry. A slow song started and Joe and I grew closer and started to slow dance. I rested my head on his shoulder and he held me tight.
"I've gone through so much with him." I thought to myself. "I think he is the one."
When I say 'the one' I don't necessarily mean the one I'm going to spend the rest of my life with but someone I'm meant to be with. We have talked about going...all the way. I was just never sure or ready before. But now that I'm a senior and know who he is and I know he loves me and I know I love him.
"Joe. I'm ready." I said looking up at him.
He was confused.
"Ready for what?"
Then I kissed him in a way I never had before to send the message across.
I pulled back and saw shock on his face.
"Are you sure?" He asked acting as if it was too good be true.
I nodded.
He hugged me and we finished our dance.
After, we went outside to look for Oliver and Lily. When we found them they we kissing.
"Whoa, whoa. Let's keep it P-G people!" I said ruining their moment because I'm the greatest best friend in the world.
"It was a harmless kiss!" Lily exclaimed jumping from the bench they were sitting on.
"I know. I was just messing with you." I said laughing.
"Mean!"
"I know. I just wanted to let you guys know Joe and I are going to head out."
"Okay. Oliver can you take me home?" Lily asked.
"Of course." He said with a large grin.
"Great. Thanks. See you guys later!" I said before grabbing Joe's hand and walking out.
I had no idea what we were doing. I was just so happy. I got in the driver's seat of his car. "Where are we going and why are you driving my car?"
"Just trust me." I said starting the car.
My parents were out of town for the night and my brothers were already passed out in their room. I led Joe down the hall and to my room. Luckily it was clean. I closed the door behind me and walked over to him. He seemed to be in shock still. I kissed him deeply and pressed myself against him. It didn't take him long to get into it. He wrapped his arms around me and slowly unzipped my dress. I started to un belt his pants and pull out his shirt, then started unbuttoning it. Our hearts were racing as he pushed me back against the bed and touched me all over. It was really happening. I never wanted it to end. By the end we were lying in my bed under the covers and I was under his arm cuddling him. He kissed my head and I closed my eyes.
"I can't believe we really did it." He said.
"Do you wish you didn't?" I asked sitting up and looking at him.
"No. I liked it. I just never thought it would happen."
"I never thought I would lose it to you." I said laughing.
"And I never thought I'd lose it to you."
"I'm glad I did though. I trust and love you more than anything."
He lightly kissed my lips.
"I trust and love you too."
I felt different the next morning.
I completely gave myself to Joe.
"Why are you like glowing?" One of my brothers asked me.
"I don't know what your talking about." I lied.
"You look really happy. Which is really weird since its the morning."
"I just had a good night that's all." I said walking back to my room.
"Hey." said a text from Joe on my phone when I got back to my room.
"Hi." I replied.
"How are you? :)"
"I'm good. I had a great time last night :)"
"I did too :)"
I wasn't sure if I should tell Lily about last night.
Joe and I talked for a couple hours then I decided to text Lily.
"Hey. How was the rest of your night?"
"It was amazing! Oliver is so amazing! We talked all night and we kissed a couple times and he asked me to be his girlfriend! I said yes of course. I'm so happy! What did you and Joe do?"
I paused a moment then responded.
"We came back to my house."
"Oh what did you guys do? You both had goofy smiles and looked like...well I can't explain it but it looked like you guys were up to something."
"Well uh.."
"What did you guys do?"
"We took it to the next level..."
"Oh my gosh you didn't!"
"We did.."
"Wow Miley.."
"Yeah."
She didn't seem upset, just shocked. When Monday came around I still felt different.
"Hey." Joe said finding me and kissing me on the cheek.
"Hi." I said with a small smile.
We held hands and walked in silence around the school.
Everything seemed to be going well. I had a boyfriend I was deeply in love with, great friends, and a family who loves me. What could be better? Oh yeah, getting into collage.
The end of senior year was growing closer. I really had to start thinking about my future.
"I have no idea what I'm going to do!" I said lying on Joe's bed after school that day.
"Well which school do you want to go to?" He asked lying next to me.
"I want to be near you." I said turning and facing him.
He put his hand on my cheek.
"I do to but what I also want is what's best for you."
"Well my options are Colorado, Oregon, and Massachusetts."
"And my choices are here or Colorado."
"I could just stay here. I wasn't planning on it but I did get accepted here. We could go together." "But you wanted to go out of state for collage. I don't want to hold you back."
"I'll be happy anywhere you are."
"We can talk about it later." He said kissing my cheek then getting up.
"We need to figure it out soon. We can't just keep pushing it off. Unless you don't want to stay together." I said sitting up.
"You know I do! I love you Miley!"
"Then why don't you want to talk about it?"
"Because we still have six months!"
"Fine!" I said getting up and walking out the door.
"Miley. Come on!" He said coming after me.
I opened my car door but turned to him.
"What?" I asked irritated.
"Don't be mad at me."
"I'm not mad. I just really wish you would take the future seriously."
"Why is this so important? We still have time!"
"And it's going to fly by! I want to get this figured out so I know if I have a future with you or not!"
He stayed silent.
"Let me know when your ready to come back to reality." I said getting in my car and closing the door.
I didn't understand why he didn't want to figure this out.
When I got home I parked my car in the driveway, but when I got out I saw someone sitting on the bench. When I saw who it was I burst into tears and broke down. When the person stepped toward me and touched me I blacked out.