Disclaimer: Still wishing I owned more than the plot line and idea. Still am not a man, still can't write music, therefore, I cannot claim any of the songs.

Song this time is Still Alive from Portal...I'm addicted. Sorry!

Honestly, anyone who is missing this chapter, that's seriously alright because the better half of this is pretty much Alice with a curling iron...though there might be something essential you need to know. I'm seriously thinking that I should have written it the way I planned in the first place, but I had to give all of the gory details! Ha ha.

Ok...so...I think I got like twenty reviews on the last chapter, which was...amazingly odd, but still so amazing...

If you guys break one hundred this time, I might just be able to give you all a Christmas Eve present!...but that means that people who don't normally review would have to review (if you review and don't want a quote, just say so! I wouldn't want to ruin the story for anyone, promise!)

Oh, and, this is uneditted. I was too tired. Excuse the mistakes. You can yell at me in your reviews. Ha ha.

P.S. You'll all get a Christmas Eve present anyway. I just wanted to see if that gave insentive! Sorry! Being a Scrooge!

Chapter Twelve

Yes, I have guilted myself into going on a date with Edward Masen. It was actually quite funny. I mean, I had a foolproof plan to get out of the pent house without being noticed.

COMPLETELY foolproof.

If I had taken in certain factors which were CLEARLY presented.

Factors like Jacob sleeping in my room, or even being in the house period. I have to admit, he was infuriating, a nuisance that I hadn't imagined. When I realized my plan didn't even consider him, I was actually quite…beside myself, really. I thought I had thought of absolutely everything.

While I was still riding home, I sent Edward a text message.

Edward,

Sorry about the dinner plans.

You wouldn't happen to still be available, would you?

His reply comes much too soon on my phone…and, at the same time, not soon enough. The tone of his text message: panicked.

Bella, is something wrong? Where are you? Do you need a ride somewhere?

I think I almost choke on my own saliva when I read it.

Fine, perfectly fine.

I tap the message back out with an amused smile on my face.

But…I was wondering if you'd still like to go to dinner…?

I sigh and hit 'send' before I can regret it. Emmett, sitting in the front seat, driving in silence, suspects nothing.

I send Alice a quick text message.

Al:

I don't feel so good. I'm not sure if you're going to be at the penthouse, so I'm texting to tell you that I'm going to lay down for a bit.

I hope that can at least get me out of the fashion show. I was working on how to get out of the house, unnoticed. I could ask Jacob to cover for me, but then he would probably ask too many questions and Edward Masen would end up dead in a ditch tomorrow morning.

My phone vibrates to two text messages.

I open the one that blares 'Alice' in all capital, bold letters.

I'm at home. Are you still up for going clubbing with Rose? Come on, it'll be fun! We can hype you up on the vicodin that dumb doctor who deals with your ovaries gave you…or was that the stuff you were allergic to? If it's not pain, I'm sure we can dig something out of my Gucci medicine chest!

I snort. Alice was getting out of the house. That was a good thing. Emmett wouldn't tell anyone. If all else failed, I would tell him I was going out with Rosalie and Alice afterall, that I would call them in-route to find out where they were. I would have to start coming up with excuses to avoid the Gucci bag which Alice kept everything imaginable in. We called it her 'drug store' because if you needed ANYTHING, say the words and Alice would pull it out of her bag.

I open Edward's next.

Did you have something in mind?

How to answer that…I try something that seems the least suspicious.

What did YOU have in mind for tonight. You were the one that asked me to dinner. Lol.

After I sent it, the first this that popped into my head was 'Did I just type "lol"? What am I? Sixteen?' I shake my head and give an exhausted sigh.

"Alice?" Emmett asks from the front seat.

I decide it's best to tell a half truth. "Yeah."

"Dancing with Rosalie?" As if he didn't already know.

"Yeah," I say, my smug smirk plastered on my face. "You know, you're good. You should open up a fortune telling business."

"Hardly. I get my information from Alice. She's the crazy one of us," he says, hiding laughter.

"Yeah." I mutter again.

"I like your mono-syllabic vocabulary tonight, Bells. It makes you rather agreeable," he says, his voice laden with sarcasm. I'm just marveling at the fact that he even knew the word 'syllabic'. "So…what are you going to tell her?"

I put on my most pathetic, cracking voice, one which I learned while I had a really bad case of type B strep throat, and say, "That I feel sick."

Emmett laughs. "I'd buy it. Of course, the real test is going to be Alice," Emmett waits a few moments before speaking. "I'll back you up. You can walk into the apartment leaning on me, if you want, but then I'm going out for drinks with Rose's brother and one of my other high school friends. If Alice still goes out with Rosalie, you'll have the pent house all to yourself…except, of course, for Jacob, who I am surprised hasn't killed anyone yet."

I cock my head and look at Emmett through the rear view mirror. My phone vibrates in my lap, but I ignore it. "What do you mean?"

Emmett sighs. "He's extremely volatile, especially where you're concerned," Emmett says, seriously. "The boy's got a crush the size of the San Andreas fault."

My eyes blaze with anger. "Emmett, don't make fun of Jacob like that. He's my friend, nothing more."

Emmett shrugs. "Whatever you say, Bells."

I might have some serious rethinking of my plan to do. That and Emmett's comment has me thinking 'What if Jake does have a crush on me?'

I do stagger into the apartment on Emmett's arm. Emmett loves the fact that he gets to be in on this little charade. He's having so much fun that he helps me to a couch, and covers me up with a blanket. "Get some rest, Bells."

"Oh my God!" Alice rushes over to me. "What happened?"

"I feel sick," I whimper, pulling the blanket tighter around me.

Jacob must hear because he rushes into the room, looking the ever concerned, loyal best friend. "What's wrong with her?" Alice has to shoulder him out of her way. She smoothes my hair down and whispers to me that 'everything's alright.'

Alice looks at Emmett curiously. "She got sick in the car," is his reply. He looks at his watch fro dramatic effect and says, "Listen, I told Jasper I would meet him in about five minutes. I hate to leave Bella here alone, but…Jake's here with her, right?"

Alice rolls her eyes, but nods. Emmett turns toward the door. On his way out, he winks at me before closing it as quietly as he can. "I take it you don't feel like clubbing tonight?" Alice asks, pouting.

"Not really," I say, shivering, hoping I at least get points for creativity. I sniffle. "I think I'm just going to stay here for a while and curl up under my blankets."

Alice snaps to attention. "Dog!" She yells to Jacob. I do wish she'd quit calling him that. He is a human being, not matter how loyal and cuddly he may be. She associates him with a B movie werewolf or something… "Out of her room. You sleep on the couch. Bella is going to sleep, alone, in her room. I think she has a cold. Maybe it's just now setting in from all of the filming outside. You shouldn't push yourself so hard, Bells!" She says, concerned. She tugs on my arm to get me up and leads me, slumping, to my room.

She treats me like a six year old again, tucking me in, ordering Jacob 'out' again, and then shutting the door quietly before turning back to me.

"Are you ok?" Alice asks, the cute features filled with fear and concern.

"Yeah," I mutter. I feel great, in truth. Edward told me he would be picking me up for our nine o'clock dinner reservations at eight-thirty. I planned on walking since the restaurant, Cicada, was right around the corner.

It was already eight. If the plans had remained the same, Alice should leave any minute.

But she didn't. She came and sat on my mattress. "How are you feeling?" She asked me, her voice patronizing.

"Terrible," I moan, rolling over. Something tells me that she isn't buying this, but it's the only shot I have.

Alice smoothes back my hair. "Aw, poor baby," she says before taking my shoulders rather aggressively. "Now get up and don't pull that crap with me 'cuz I heard about your date!"

"What?" I try to sound, not surprised, but confused. "What date?" I moan.

She pulls me up by the shoulders and roughly sits me in a chair by the vanity she insisted upon buying me…well, more like throws me in the chair. "Stop faking it," she says, taking up my hair brush and begins brushing out my hair. It's amazing how gently she does it. I'm not sure I trust her, though.

She hums as she chatters, placing the shortest front layer of my hair around my face to frame it as she begins to pull the rest of the front back. "Oh, rats…I forgot my curling iron…" she pouts as she ties a black scrunci around the ponytail she has formed on the back of my head.

"I don't know why you're doing this. I'm not going anywhere…" I mutter, though I don't sound sick.

Alice turns back to me as she opens the door to run into her room and grab the essentials. "Madame Mary Alice Brandon knows all," she says, teasingly, thought I wouldn't be surprised if that entire statement was true. She comes back within three seconds with a make-up bag the size of the purse I usually carry, a curling iron, a straightener, something that looks like a tiny corkscrew, a clear plastic bag full of shiny hair adornments, and a dress in a Saks Fifth Avenue bag.

"What is all of that?" I ask, warily, looking at the things, trying to decide which is the most torturous of the torture objects.

Alice smiles, a mischievous grin. "Stuff to make you look pretty!"

Oh, yeah, torture objects.

"Now," Alice says, plugging everything into available sockets. "What kind of look should we go for?" Alice walks a circle around me. She's like a lion hunting a poor little antelope, except this one would happen to be a not so graceful antelope, possibly with a broken leg. "I say, sweet and innocent," she voices her opinion, the only opinion, and takes up the straightener as she flatirons the front part of my hair. "You're going to looks so pretty!" She admires the flat ironing.

"I still don't know why you're doing this; I'm not going clubbing," I mutter.

Alice tilts her head to the side. "Clubbing? Who said anything about clubbing? I'm making you look pretty for your date with Edward, darling," Alice says.

I am in awe. "What date?" I say, again, pretending to know nothing about what she's talking about.

"The one at Cicada. Your reservations are at nine, right?" My silence is taken as affirmation. "So…eight-thirty, knowing Edward. Aside from the fact that it might take you that long, dependant upon traffic. It's August, so it really is still a major tourist season. Until September pretty much the entire country might as well be out here." Alice surmises as she takes up the curling iron, sprays my hair down with a bottle of hair spray, and begins to curl the ends of my long hair. "Now, I've never really been to Cicada, but one of my clients went there last fall and it's supposed to be VERY fancy. Use your best etiquette, ok? Make me proud that I claim you. I'd much prefer it if you didn't throw wine on him as he is being quite nice this time…even if it is white wine." I open my mouth to say something, but she snaps at me. "If you say you don't know a thing about this one more time, I will go through your cell phone and show you all of the text messages between the two of you."

"How did you know about all of this?" I snap, ready to turn around, getting hit in the back with a curling iron and cursing.

"That's what happens when you jerk around," Alice says, rolling her eyes. "I know everything…aside from the fact that Edward was supposed to go out for drinks with Jasper and Jasper said he cancelled. Well, you're canceling, too, and, honestly, what are the odds that both of you just happen to choose to be hermits on the same night? So, I went around and dug up what I could…and half of it was intuition."

"Alice," I say, warningly, "This was supposed to be a secret."

Alice laughs. "From me? Yeah, right! When you get back, I want all of the gory details...provided that you do get back and don't spend the night in the hospital again."

"Alice!" I say, as threateningly as I can muster. "You cannot tell anyone!"

Alice laughs again. "Bella, do you honestly think I would tell anyone about this?" She shakes her head and laughs. "IF you want the honest truth, I'm having too much fun with this. Besides, it's a once in a lifetime thing. It's not like you're going to be dating him!" Alice says, laughing hysterically.

I grimace. She's right there. This was a one time thing. I was too plain for Edward to even consider me attractive. The sparks I felt were just chemistry on-screen, not off. Alice finishes and I shake my head to clear it, using the bouncy curls as an excuse.

Eight ten.

Alice really is a miracle worker.

Alice pulls out the dress next. "This," she says, reverently, holding it like the Bible itself, "Is a Versace off the rack. I bought this in New York for the dinner tomorrow, but I think that this occasion is perfect for it."

I can't help but gape in awe.

The black dress is a straight sheath which was possibly the most conservative thing Alice had ever bought me. It would go down just below my knees, though I think on the model it was intended to be above her knees. I was short, not like Rosalie. There was a simple ruffle right beneath my breasts. The sleeves were barely on the shoulder, short ruffles of black mesh that would fit my upper arms snuggly.

It was pretty. Very pretty and very expensive. "But…what am I wearing tomorrow night?" I ask in desperation to be rid of it.

"Ah," Alice shrugs. "Don't worry. I've got a lot of off the rack stuff that I bought today for you. They're all designer, but I didn't have very much time to get them fitted to you." This was short for Alice told them 'I want this, this, this, and this in these measurements and, if it's not ready in five minutes, you'll never work in the fashion industry again.'

"Why can't you just use the stuff that you design?" I moan, looking dismally at the dress. I was going to trip and rip it.

"Because!" Alice says, huffily. "Mary Alice is an exclusive line. I've been so busy getting ready for Paris summer fall fashion week, not to mention Milan and New York, that having to deal with you and three new lines requires me to shop rather than sew." I roll my eyes. She pats my shoulder. "Don't worry. I'm making your dress for the premiere already!"

She throws the dress at me with a slip and some kind of contraption that appears to be a corset, but if she thought she was getting me into that, she was nuts. Alice had other plans. She didn't plan on me dressing myself at all. "Now, stand up, put those on the chair, in the order, take your shirt off, take your bra off, and pull the corset around you…or I will be forced to tackle you." I do as she orders.

Five minutes later, my chest is sky high, my twenty-four inch waist is now twenty-two inches, and I'm not sure if I can breathe properly…and I know I could sing in this thing. Talking's going to be a problem enough. So, I'm standing in a mini-slip with a corset on as Alice tries to get the dress over my newly grown chest size.

Can't wait till she zips me up. It'll be another size bigger.

Alice tugs VERY hard on the dress, I think I hear something rip and the dress is under my chest. I look at the pixie in amazement. "Did something just…"

"Rip?" Alice asks. She shrugs as she pulls the dress back up over my chest, holding the sleeve to one side as I slip my arm in and doing the same with the other side. She pulls the skirt of it down, pushes my breasts up over the ruffle, something I find awkward, and takes something and sprays it at my chest, sticking the dress to me. She doesn't spray anything but that before she zips me up.

"Spray adhesive," she explains. She walks around me, surveying to see if she did any damage. "You're great…now…" she takes out a thin belt with a Greek buckle. "You'll wear this on your waist. With your curves in that corset, your waist will look about two inches. And you have to wear the matching black velvet sandals!" She pulls out death traps and I roll my eyes.

"Flats?"

Alice glares. "Not a chance." I groan again. Alice begins to platter on again. "All of it's Versace. You'll be perfect. It's going to look great. Now for the make-up…I have thirteen minutes to make you look gorgeous!"

She throws me in the chair and takes out foundation which begins to get slathered all over my face. I squeeze my eyes shut and wait for it to be over. I open my eyes when I feel spray on my face. "WHAT IS THAT?!" I rage. She's going to ruin the make-up!

"Model in a bottle!" Alice says, waving a setting spray at me. "They use this stuff in Wicked on the Witch all the time. You should know to trust this!" She seems appalled. I look at myself in the mirror. My eyes resemble a male peacock, but not in a bad way. It's light blue on the inner corners and dark blue on the outer corners with a deep blue liquid eyeliner flared out. My eyelashes are curled and mascaraed. My face looks gorgeous, captivating.

Alice glances at the clock. "With five minutes to spare! Yes!" She does a very Emmett-esque fist pump as the door buzzer calls her away. "Come on, Bells. We have to see the look on his face."

I suddenly remember that Alice should be with Rose. "Aren't you supposed to be out?"

Alice smiles. "I pushed us back an hour. No biggie." She smiles mischievously as she opens the door.

Alice has to put on a charade at the door. "Edward!" She says, as surprised as possible. "What are you doing here? Did you need to see Bella? She was VERY sick, but I'm sure she'll feel much better once she finds out you're here!" She laughs before attacking him as she invites him in. "Did you honestly think you could keep anything from me or are you both idiots?"

Edward is dressed very nicely. He is wearing a suit jacket, dress pants that match, a white button-up shirt which is open at the neck to reveal part of his beautiful torso. My breath catches in my throat as my body hums. He is gorgeous.

My body can not behave itself while he is around. He is comparable to pure sex in its most saturated form…of course, I wouldn't know as I am a virgin.

I shake my head. I can't let my lust get in the way. One date is all I have to get through. Just one.

Edward is holding flowers, something I notice only after I have examined everything else about him. "They aren't roses," he says, as if I couldn't see that. It's lilies and freesia. "I wasn't sure if you were simply not fond of rose or of me…either way, I thought I should change my tactics," he says, jokingly.

I reach out to take the flowers, but Alice gets them first. "Hurry up and get out of here before Emmett of Jacob see and then we all die!" She laughs, all but pushing us out the door.

Edward escorts me out of the apartment building. We both are silent.

"Why did you change the flowers?" I ask, my voice might sound weak, but that's all I can muster.

Edward glances at me to see my looking at the ground for two reasons: one- so I don't have to look at him and two- so that I can see where I am walking so I won't fall in these death traps.

I can't believe I'm still shorter than him in these.

"As I said, I wasn't sure if you didn't like roses," he says, though his voice is still light.

"But, I do." I say, finally looking at him as he opens the passenger side of his car. It takes me a moment to realize that we're in an Aston Martin, not his Volvo.

Edward helps me inside before he goes over to his side of the car. "Really? You would prefer the roses?" He smiles. "You are a very unpredictable person, Isabella Swan."

I turn my face toward him, looking at him with a genuine smile on my face. "I'll take that as a compliment."

Edward pulls smoothly enough out of the parking place to make me jealous of his parallel parking skills. The smile is still on his face as we have to stop at a traffic signal. He looks at me and I note the sparkle in his eyes. "Would you like another one?" His voice is still teasing.

I roll my eyes, smiling playfully. "Watch it, buddy; you wouldn't want to get red wine all over that shirt, too."

He laughs. "I doubt that this would get me in too much trouble." I look at him, appraisingly. "You look very beautiful tonight." His words sound so sincere that I feel like a sixteen year old girl who is about to go around the corner into her room and jump up and down with a horrendous grin on her face.

As it is right now, I'll stick with the horrendous grin. I think I can get away with that one.

All things considered, I still couldn't help getting out at the restaurant and asking myself 'What am I doing here?...with him of all people?"

What will happen next?...as if that isn't obvious enough. Ha ha.

Hope you enjoyed and I hope that everyone is having a marvelous Christmas season!