Well this took long enough to update. Sorry guys. Hope you like it! I don't own anything you recognize in this story! Hugs and kisses to all my wonderful readers!
Blaine hummed softly as he played the keyboard for a few minutes before Kurt came home. It was a song that had just popped into his head that he needed to get out. As he played it he felt the release of the sadness and pain from his life with Hunter as well as the happiness he was now becoming used to with Kurt. he smiled as he thought of his Dom, of the man who had given him hope and a future again, or maybe it was for the first time. he'd been claimed only a couple weeks but he felt happier than he had ever been.
Kurt entered the apartment and for the first time in a month and a half, there was not a sub on his knees to greet Him. His heart stopped and fear shot through Him until He heard the soft sound of music coming from the bedroom. The song was haunting and at the same time, somehow joyous, Kurt was sure He'd never heard it before. He slowly and quietly approached their bedroom, not wanting to interrupt Blaine, who from what Kurt could see as He peeked through into the room, was in a world of his own. Kurt smiled, Blaine had put on a bit of weight, and he was slowly getting to a healthy weight, and more slowly a healthy mentality, though Kurt knew that once He greeted Blaine and the sub realized he had lost track of time and would panic and expect punishment. That was okay though, Kurt was learning how to defuse his panic before it got very far. Now Blaine seemed to positively glow, as he was getting what his body, heart and mind needed for the first time in his life.
Blaine played the piano as if he were born to do it, as if there was nothing more natural for him. It made Kurt happy to see the peace on Blaine face that could normally only be found when they just finished a scene, and though Kurt did love being the one that put that look on Blaine's face, He couldn't help but be happy that His sub's happiness wasn't solely because of Him.
Blaine focused on the keys in front of him, not letting anything but the music come into his brain. The notes flew through him, engulfing him and letting him drown while still breathing. his heart seemed to beat in time to the music and he couldn't stop the smile that came on his face. he knew he should have stopped and started dinner, it was nearing that time, but he couldn't bring himself to take his fingers off the keys.
Kurt just stood there watching him for nearly 15 minutes, careful not to even breathe too loudly and disturb Blaine, though from the look on Blaine's face, a war could be going on in the living room and he wouldn't have looked up. Kurt finally turned and headed into the kitchen to start dinner, He knew His cooking skills wouldn't be too rusty. He fixed pork chops with roasted rosemary potatoes and grilled asparagus, the pork chops only had 5 minutes left when He heard a sharp cry and the sound of footsteps barreling down the hall. Blaine was white as a sheet when he appeared in the kitchen doorway.
"Hello, My love," Kurt greeted him casually, hoping Blaine would quickly pick up that He wasn't upset. Unfortunately Blaine went even paler and he started stammering, his breathing shortening and his hands started shaking.
"i—i- didn't- i just-" Blaine looked miserable, a far cry from earlier.
"Hey, hey," Kurt soothed, standing to embrace him but Blaine flinched violently and took a step back, that hurt more than Kurt would ever admit. "Zuri, you know I don't do that," Kurt said calmly, hoping Blaine didn't hear the hurt feelings. Blaine whined softly, tears trailing down his face, "Baby, I'm not angry at you," he claimed, taking a step closer and this time Blaine let him, though Kurt could practically see the tension rolling off of him.
"I'm so sorry, Mast-Bwana I," Kurt froze at Blaine's near slip up and Blaine knew instantly what he did. "No, that's not what i meant, i just… Oh Bwana i…" a soft sob escaped Blaine's lips. Kurt lunged forward and pulled Blaine into his arms, ignoring the cry of panic Blaine released.
"I love you Zuri, I don't ever want you to be afraid of Me, I won't ever punish you physically or otherwise for doing something as innocent as playing your keyboard." Kurt wiped Blaine's face tenderly, "It was absolutely beautiful, by the way, what you were playing." Blaine sniffed softly, blushing shyly, "You are not going to be punished, My darling. It gave me the chance to cook again and I quite enjoyed Myself." He promised, holding Blaine close, letting him lay his head on His chest. Blaine was still trembling but Kurt was fairly certain it wasn't because of fear of Kurt anymore but rather memories of the past. There were days Kurt would give anything to know everything that happened to Blaine so that He could completely fix it.
"i-i got di-distracted," Blaine muttered, Kurt felt Blaine fist His shirt, trying to make sure he wasn't separated from Kurt.
"That's fine, sweetheart, it's not wrong to get into your music. I don't want you to ever think that your life is supposed to only be about Me. Yes, you are My sub, but I want you to have your own life too. I want you to get distracted by something you love; I want you to be excited about it. I would have interrupted you if I thought you were only supposed to serve Me, that is not your life's purpose, Blaine. One day you can go back to school if you want, or get a job." Blaine looked up at Kurt surprised, "you are My favourite thing about being home, but I don't want this apartment to become your prison, even if you never look at it that way."
"i like being here," Blaine whispered, trying not to quiver at the idea of his true reason, which was that he didn't think he could face going outside yet, especially without Kurt.
"I know you do, sweetheart, and I won't ever make you do anything before you are ready," Kurt replied, kissing him lightly. Blaine then remembered the conversation he'd heard the night after their claiming,
"Is that why You still haven't taken me to meet Your parents?" Blaine asked before quickly realizing he was being disrespectful and after what he'd just done he hardly thought he should be so much as speaking without permission let alone being snarky. Kurt traced is face slowly, His fingers barely actually touching Blaine's flesh.
"Do you want to meet them?" Kurt asked softly, His tone of voice showed there was absolutely no pressure and Blaine bit his lip.
"i just don't want to disappoint You, they might not like me," Blaine admitted softly. Kurt smiled softly,
"I love you, that will be good enough for them," He claimed. Blaine looked up at Him, every other thought left him as those blue eyes bore into him. The insecurity, the fear, the pain of the past, everything just faded- he had Kurt, the rest of it was just details.
"i want You to be proud of me, so if that means meeting Your parents then-" Blaine began, but Kurt shook His head,
"I am proud of you because you are Mine, that's it." Kurt reported, and Blaine's eyes filled with tears, "That's all I need to know to be proud. The rest of it is just extra that makes me the luckiest Dom in the world." Blaine shook his head, "I walked into this apartment and My heart stopped when you weren't at the door." Blaine flinched and ducked his head but Kurt lifted his head affectionately, smiling warmly, "Then I heard you playing that keyboard and I knew you are healing. you aren't letting being a sub and being afraid of punishment run your thought process, you are letting yourself be… you." Kurt tried to explain, stroking Blaine's face. "I don't ever want you to be a mindless slave, you are My boy and I love you more than I can possible tell you, but the very last thing I ever want, is for you to think only of serving Me. you are just as important, being submissive doesn't make you weak." He paused, "Hell it makes you the strongest person in this room." Blaine's face shot up to Him, shock and confusion on his face. "Do you realize that I could never do what you do? I could never give Myself fully as you choose to, you choose to let Me tie you down and have control, do you know amazing that is? I've always thought subs were the most incredible people because you all can do something Doms could never dream of doing." Kurt stated.
"But subs can't do what Doms do either," Blaine claimed mildly desperate to not to let himself be put above Kurt, or Doms in general. Kurt smiled stroking his cheek,
"It's not as brave to take control as it is to give it up. I could hurt you," Kurt admitted, "I could go too far, you as well as anyone knows how Doms can hurt and mistreat subs, some without meaning to, but… you make the decision every single day to trust Me not to hurt you. I hope you know that's not something I take lightly." Blaine couldn't help but smile as he buried his face in Kurt's neck,
"I know Bwana," Blaine whispered.
"So I know my cooking can't possibly be as good as yours, but if you're interested, dinner is ready." Blaine nodded, and gave Kurt one last squeeze before releasing Him and falling to his knees. Kurt smiled and put dinner on the table, Blaine had taken a huge step.
Later that night after all the dishes were washed and Blaine had promised to play the keyboard whenever he wished, they cuddled on the couch. Blaine would never tire of the weight of his collar or the comfort of Kurt's arms around him, but he couldn't help but think that maybe it was time for him to start being a bit more proactive in his own healing.
"Bwana," he said meekly nuzzling his face into Kurt's shirt.
"Mmm," Kurt replied softly. Blaine paused, he wasn't used to asking for things, especially if not in the dungeon, but here he was trying to gather the courage to ask the man who loved him, to help him go outside. Sure he'd gone out when they were going to sign the claiming papers and to confront Hunter, but that is because Kurt was there and Blaine wasn't thinking about where he was, but rather whom he was with. Kurt kissed brought his hand to His lips and kissed it tenderly, "Safe." Kurt whispered, reminding Blaine who he was with. Blaine's mouth twisted up and he nodded,
"i was wondering-" he bit his lip and inhaled before opening his mouth again, "Do You think maybe we could start going out more? Nothing huge just… like walks around the block so that i can-" he cut himself off, sounding completely ridiculous. Kurt however held Blaine tighter for a moment before kissing his hair,
"I'm so proud that you are Mine," He stated. "Of course we can, we can do anything you want, at whatever pace you need to take." Blaine smiled and leaned further into Kurt's embrace,
"i am just afraid i'm not going to be able to take it." Blaine whispered. Kurt kissed his neck and shoulder several times,
"This isn't some kind of test, Zuri, I'm willing to do this if it's what you want and I don't ever want to make you go out if you don't want to. And if you do push yourself too hard I will be there to hold you until you don't hurt so much," Kurt promised. Blaine shook his head,
"Sometimes i don't know how i fell in love with someone so corny," Blaine teased. Kurt play swatted him,
"I don't know how I fell in love with someone so mouthy," Kurt replied. Blaine blushed shyly, burying his face in Kurt's shoulder. Kurt chuckled kindly and hugged Blaine tighter to Him, "Mmm, I love that mouth," He stated. Blaine blushed harder and sighed softly, this was going to be a long, painful process, but maybe with Kurt by his side, he could do it.
It was the next day when Blaine decided he wanted to try it for the first time. Kurt didn't want him to push himself too hard just yet so it would be a trip to their building's elevator and back, by himself, without Kurt holding his hand. Standing next to Kurt as he looked down the hallway, which seemed to stretch on forever, Blaine gulped hard.
"you're going to be fine, absolutely nothing can or will happen to you, you'll be in My line of vision the entire time." Blaine took a huge breath in and set his mind and body to go forward. he made it halfway to the elevator before freezing, what if everything wasn't okay? What if someone came and saw him and got to him before Kurt could? he wasn't supposed to leave his Dom's home, that wasn't allowed, he was too weak and—
"Blaine," the voice was calm and firm, and still several yards behind him. "I'm right here," Kurt reminded him. Blaine forced himself not to look back, he knew if he looked back, he'd go running to Kurt, and he wanted to prove to Kurt but most of all himself that he was capable of more. The voices in his head however, weren't so kind, yelling at him that a sub's place was in the home, and how dare he let himself be convinced that he was ever going to be anything more than a piece of furniture meant for Kurt's use. It was his father's voice more than Hunter's that rang out the loudest.
"Father," Blaine said meekly, "Please let me go see them." Blaine had just been marked as submissive a couple weeks ago and his father had forced him to quit all extracurricular activities, which meant he only got to see his friends at school.
"No!" his father replied, "you are a sub, Blaine, which means you will never be your own person again." Tears filled Blaine's eyes, he hadn't wanted to be a sub, he hadn't wanted to know that his future meant he would be treated the way his mother was treated, as little more than a tool or object to be pulled out when useful.
"But i'm not claimed," Blaine whispered quietly, not quietly enough apparently,
"That is irrelevant!" Mr. Anderson claimed, his voice not raising in anger, for Blaine was no longer worthy of evoking emotions. "submissives don't go out on their own, they don't have wishes and wants, they have nothing but the primal need to serve their master, is that clear?" Blaine's heart broke at those words, and he wasn't sure it would ever be put back together.
"Yes, Sir," he complied.
No. Blaine shook his head, that wasn't true, he did have wants, and he wanted to prove that he was more than what his father and Hunter had tried to force him to be. He was more than a sex toy, he was a person with hope and dreams and feelings, and he didn't want to ignore them anymore. he wanted to be everything Kurt believed he could be, he wanted to be a sub worthy of a Dom like Kurt, and he would.
Suddenly the elevator dinged and unaware of how he'd even gotten there, he flinched and cowered slightly as he braced himself for who would be behind the door. It was just a man in a suit, a Dom, but not one Blaine knew. Blaine backed away slightly, whimpering, expecting to be scolded. The Dom looked down at him in concern,
"Are you okay, pet?" Blaine stared at Him for a moment before nodding.
"Mark," Kurt called, both Blaine and the Dom looked up at Kurt who was beaming with pride and Blaine forgot to breathe. It wasn't until Kurt joined them and put His arm around Blaine's waist that Blaine inhaled again.
"Are you okay, love?" Kurt asked, and Blaine nodded honestly.
"Hey Kurt," the man greeted pleasantly. Then He paused and His face lit up, "Oh my God, is this your new sub?" Without waiting for conformation He held His hand out to be shook, "It's so good to finally meet the sub who made Kurt smile again." Blaine looked at him surprised and took His hand. The Dom smiled warmly at him,
"Nice to meet You, Sir," Blaine said quietly, leaning into Kurt once his hand was released. Mark didn't give him the same terrified feelings that a lot of Dom's had, but he was still a Dom and Blaine wasn't sure how to react to Him. Mark smiled at him before looking up at Kurt,
"How's Your baby?" Kurt asked, smiling when Mark's grin suddenly stretched from ear to ear.
"She's beautiful, still keeping Me and her mom up all night but hey, I can't think of a better problem to have." Kurt chuckled kindly,
"I'm so happy for You guys," there was more to that story but Blaine didn't dare ask now, he just stood silently next to Kurt, staring at the floor.
"Well thank You, I thought I'd lose Jenny too if…" Mark stopped for a moment before continuing, Kurt put His hand on Mark's shoulder, giving Him a smile of comfort before Mark cleared his throat, "Sorry, anyway, I've got to be going, but I'm so happy for You and it was a pleasure to meet you, little one," Mark said to Blaine who smiled shyly and nodded,
"It was nice to meet You too, Sir." Mark smiled warmly and moved to walk past them,
"Have a good night."
"You too," Kurt replied, "Tell Jenny I said hello," Mark nodded before heading down the hall. Kurt turned his attention to Blaine, "Let's go back to the apartment," Blaine nodded, leaning against Kurt maybe more than he wanted to have to but he also knew his Dom would never judge him for needing Him. Once inside the apartment Kurt pulled Blaine to Him and put His chin over Blaine's hair. Blaine sighed in relief he wasn't away he wanted and nuzzled into Kurt's chest. "Oh My beautiful boy, I am so proud of you." Blaine could do nothing more than smile and mutter,
"Thank you, Bwana," into His chest as he sighed happily at the closeness they were sharing. It was the kind of closeness Blaine had only ever seen in movies.
"Today down the hall, tomorrow around the world," Kurt cheered, pulling away from Blaine who giggled at Kurt's ridiculousness but couldn't help but flush in pride. Kurt smiled and kissed Blaine gently, "I can't imagine being as brave as you are."
I am less than satisfied with that ending. Sorry loves. I'll update as soon as I can