Emotions

Installment 13: Curiosity

Description: Damon hears a rumor that Elena's dreaming of him, and he's curious to find out if the rumor is true.

Context: Mid-late season 2 fic.

Rating: T

"Aren't you just a little bit curious?"

"No," Damon responded, turning around and walking up the stairs.

"I know I am," Katherine declared, following him up the stairs. He rolled his eyes.

"Stop following me."

"No," Katherine said, following Damon into his room. Damon tried to shut the door in her face, but she caught it with one perfectly pampered hand and pushed it open. Damon groaned and gave up, falling on his bed. Katherine sat on the edge of his bed and stared at him. "I bet she's dreaming of you," she said.

Damon heaved a sigh and covered his face with a pillow, trying to block out the annoying buzzing that was Katherine Pierce. He failed.

"Oh c'mon Damon, even a blind person could see that she has the hots for you," Katherine said.

"I'm not invading her dreams Katherine, so drop it," Damon responded.

"Oh, look at you being all noble and white-knighty," Katherine purred, lying down on her stomach next to him. "I thought I killed that part of you when I changed you."

Damon groaned and threw the pillow off his head, turning on his side to face her.

"I hate you, did I tell you that?"

"Not today, but it's good to have the reminder," Katherine paused. "So, are you gonna—?"

"Why do you even care?" Damon interrupted her. "I didn't think you would show so much interest in my love life."

"Hey, I used to be your love life, I have a right to be curious about it now," Katherine insisted. Damon raised his eyebrows at her skeptically. Katherine sighed and gave in. "Okay, you're right. I don't care about your love life, Damon, but I do care about Stefan's."

"So what if she is dreaming of me?" Damon asked. "That doesn't change the fact that Stefan is helplessly in love with her, and even if he wasn't, he still wouldn't love you."

"You always were such a pessimist, Damon," Katherine said. "But, I'm not. Stefan loved me once, you know. Then, he went and fell in love with my doppelganger. He may not know it yet, but he still has a little something for me. I want to see if Miss Goody-Two-Shoes Elena Gilbert isn't as good as Stefan thinks."

Damon laid there in complete silence, letting Katherine's words sink in. He was curious. He wanted to know if Katherine was right—he wanted to know if Elena had some subconscious attraction to him.

"Nope, no, never," Damon responded after a while. "Now, get out of my room."

He stood up and grabbed Katherine by the arm, dragging her out of his room and slamming the door in her face.

Damon couldn't believe he was actually doing this. If Elena ever found out, he would be dead. But nonetheless, his curiosity got the better of him.

Damon stood in the corner of Elena's room, watching her chest rise and fall with her breath. She looked so peaceful when she slept. Damon always loved watching her sleep, but he hadn't invaded her dreams in a long time. He still felt guilty about it sometimes, but Katherine had really gotten into his head—he needed to know.

Elena made a small noise and rolled over in her sleep. Damon watched her with gentle eyes. He focused on her entirely and next thing he knew, he was transported into the confines of her mind.

"Elena! Wait up!" Caroline's voice sounded. Damon watched as the blonde vampire caught up to the brunette human. They were in the Mystic Falls city courtyard.

"Hey," Elena said.

"Where are you off to?"

"The Grille," Elena responded. She began walking towards the restaurant; Caroline fell in stride with her.

Damon pursed his lips. This wasn't nearly as exciting as he had hoped it would be.

The girls walked into the Grille and Elena's eyes scanned the room. Nothing seemed out of place. Her high school peers were joking around and playing pool, Matt was busting a table, Bonnie was sitting by the fireplace engrossed in a book. It was like Damon was looking through Elena's eyes; he saw everything she saw in the exact same way she saw it. Elena's eyes darted to the bar and that's when everything changed.

Dream-Damon was sitting at the bar, nursing a bourbon. If there was such thing as tunnel vision, this was it. Everyone else blurred in Elena's peripheral vision, she could barely hear the previously-deafening noise of the Grille, but dream-Damon was clear.

Damon's jaw dropped. He wondered if this was how Elena always saw him, or if it was just her dream. Nonetheless, his heart soared.

Elena quickly began walking towards Damon; it was like she had no control over her body.

"Elena! Wait!" Caroline shouted after her.

"No, I've waited long enough," Elena responded. She marched right up to dream-Damon, spun him around, and without any hesitation, pressed her lips to his. She melted into the kiss and moaned into his mouth. She climbed onto his lap until she was straddling him and wrapped her arms around his neck. Elena broke the kiss and dropped her head to Damon's shoulder, burying her nose in his neck. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, enjoying the odd sense of peaceful happiness.

"Elena!"

Elena jumped off of Damon's lap and turned around to find Stefan, watching her with pain in his green irises. His eyes were watering and his mouth was partially open.

An overwhelming amount of guilt washed over Elena; she opened and closed her mouth, gaping like a fish out of water.

"Stefan—I—I'm sorry, I—."

Elena jolted up in bed, breathing heavily. Her eyes instantly fell on the dark figure standing in the corner of the room.

"Damon!" Elena shouted. She jumped out of bed and charged towards him.

"Elena—I swear, I didn't—."

"Get out!" Elena screamed, grabbing him by the arm and pulling him towards the window. "Get out, you terrible, terrible monster!" she practically pushed him out the window and when he was gone, she closed the window and fell against the wall. She buried her head in her hands and tried to focus on her breathing, replaying the haunting dream in her mind.

"Please Bonnie, I need you to do this," Elena begged.

"I'd rather just kill him," Bonnie said, closing her locker and giving her full attention to Elena. "Did he really do that?"

"Mhm," Elena said. "Are you really that surprised?"

"I guess not," Bonnie said with a shrug.

"I really need this, Bon," Elena insisted. "I'm spending the night at Stefan's tonight."

Bonnie sighed.

"Of course," Bonnie said. "We'll do the spell afterschool."

And surely enough, Bonnie did cast a spell over Elena. The spell aimed to protect Elena's subconscious mind from any vampire intrusion.

Elena told Bonnie that she didn't want Damon to have access to her mind anymore, but that was only part of the truth. In reality, Elena was curious—last night wasn't her first dream of Damon and she had to know if he was planting these dreams, or worst yet, if she was dreaming them all by herself.

When Elena went to the Boarding House that evening, she tried to avoid Damon. She didn't want to deal with his apology. She was genuinely pissed and just wanted to spend the night with Stefan. Luckily, Damon was out that evening and Stefan and Elena had the house to themselves.

"Elena, I'm sorry."

"I don't want to hear it, Damon."

"Seriously," Dream-Damon grabbed Elena's arm and forced her to look at him. His gorgeous blue eyes were clear with a sparkling honesty. It stole Elena's breath away. "I would never do that to you. Not anymore."

"Damon…" Elena said hesitantly.

"Do you trust me, Elena?" Dream-Damon asked. His voice was soft and sincere.

"Uh…yes," Elena admitted.

"Good," Dream-Damon responded. "Then, you trust me to do this?" He grabbed her hand and entwined their fingers. Elena looked down at the gesture and inhaled sharply. "And this?" he asked, pulling her into his arms. He wrapped his arms around her and propped his chin up on her head, swaying her gently to a song that only they could hear. Elena fell into an easy rhythm with him. She wrapped her arms around his waist without any hesitation and swayed with him. "I love you, Elena," he whispered.

Elena felt tears swell up in her eyes. Her heart thundered in her chest. She had never felt so free before and it terrified her, and hearing Damon's love confession burst open floodgates that Elena didn't even know she put up.

Tears started streaking down Elena's cheeks and she turned her head ever-so-slightly, pressing a gentle kiss to the bare skin of Damon's sternum with quivering lips. She squeezed her eyes shut and clung onto him tightly.

Elena woke up with wet eyelashes. She pushed herself up and rested against the bedframe, clutching her knees to her chest. She snuck a quick look at her boyfriend, Stefan, who was sleeping peacefully next to her. She buried her head in her knees, squeezing her eyes tightly.

She thought back to her dream, to the way it felt to reciprocate Damon's feelings. She thought back to his eyes—she's always loved those eyes, but she never let herself consciously love those eyes. She thought back to his lips—so tempting, they've always been tempting, but she's always pinned it as nothing more than lust.

This was more than lust.

And she was in charge of her dreams. That was obvious now. Bonnie's spell had definitely worked; Damon was nowhere to be found, yet Elena had dreamed of him.

She wanted him, on more than just a physical level. That much was undeniable now.

Elena heard the front door open and the gentle thud of footsteps downstairs. Her head popped up: Damon was home.

She heard him walk to the parlor, pause, walk to the bourbon, pour himself a glass, walk to the couch, plop down.

She remembered her outburst at him last night, the way she pushed him out of the house, the harsh words she used against him. Elena's heart was pierced with guilt. She needed to talk to him.

Elena crawled out of bed, careful to not wake Stefan and she tiptoed downstairs. When she reached the opening of the parlor, she saw the back of Damon's head. He was staring into the fireplace, watching the red and orange flames dance.

"Are you here to punch me?" Damon asked without turning around. Elena practically jumped out of her skin at the sound of his voice. She inhaled deeply to compose herself before speaking.

"I'm actually here to apologize," she said, walking into the parlor. She stopped when she was in front of him and she looked down at him. The light of the fire danced across his cheekbones, illuminating his darkest and most defined features. Elena's breath caught in her throat. He was beautiful.

"Hmm," Damon responded. His blue eyes darted back to the fireplace. They were darker than usual, probably from the soft lighting.

"What I did was unjustified," Elena continued. Damon raised his eyes to meet hers. He could see the guilt and regret in her eyes and he knew that she meant her words. He softened immediately.

"I'm sorry too," Damon said. "I shouldn't have been there."

Elena sighed and shrugged.

"No, you shouldn't've," she agreed. "I probably shouldn't have hit you."

"It's not exactly a new thing between us," he said sarcastically. Elena chuckled mirthlessly.

"No, I guess not," she paused, toying with the hem of her shirt. "I'm also sorry that I called you a monster."

"I am a monster, Elena," Damon insisted, meeting her eyes again. Elena furrowed her brow and subtly shook her head.

"I don't believe that," she said softly.

"Then you're an idiot."

"Maybe," Elena admitted with a shrug. "But I accused you of something you didn't do."

"Let's get something clear, Elena," Damon said, leaning forward and placing his glass on the coffee table. "I've done a lot of bad things in my existence. I've given you false dreams before; I've intruded your mind. And I intruded your mind last night, but I didn't give you that dream."

"I know," Elena whispered timidly, turning her eyes to the carpet.

"That was all you, sweetheart," Damon continued. "And yes, I probably shouldn't have intruded your mind like that, but you cannot tell me that you don't have anything for me."

Damon was sick of sugarcoating it. He knew Elena had some feelings for him; he didn't know what they were, but they were there, and he wasn't going to rest until she came to terms with that.

Naturally, Damon expected her to throw his drink in his face, give him a good ear chewing, storm off upstairs, and wake Stefan. Instead, Elena nibbled on her bottom lip and crossed her arms. Her eyelashes fluttered up as she looked at him with the most innocent, coy expression he had ever seen on her.

"I know I have something for you, Damon," Elena whispered so softly that Damon had to lean in to catch it. His eyes widened. He really didn't expect that.

"What?" Damon asked with a furrowed brow. Elena shut her eyes and pressed her palm to her forehead.

"I'm with your brother, Damon!" Elena insisted. "I have something for you, yes, and it terrifies me because I know that it's more than just lust, but I'm still with Stefan." Elena inhaled deeply and sucked on her bottom lip, attempting to keep away the tears that threatened to overflow. Damon noticed how much this was bothering her and he was overcome with sympathy.

"Hey, hey," he said soothingly, "come here." He extended his hand. Elena stared at his palm for a while before finally giving in and taking it. Damon gently pulled her down to him and tucked her under his arm. Elena immediately fell to him and placed her head on his shoulder and her hand on his chest. She closed her eyes and inhaled deeply, letting his scent overwhelm her.

"Nothing can come of this," Elena whispered weakly. Damon stroked her hair and pressed his cheek to the crown of her head.

"I know," he whispered, "at least, not yet."

Elena furrowed her brow, but Damon's continued comfort and strength immediately calmed her down and her eyelids began to feel heavy. She had an emotional couple of days, and she was exhausted.

Right before she fell asleep she remembered Damon's words: not yet, and for the first time, she seriously started to wonder: when?

A/N: I hope you enjoyed this update; I enjoyed writing it. Please let me know your thoughts in the reviews. It's unbelievably helpful! Thanks for reading!