Chapter 13: An imperfect life
In the early morning, Rin stretched out on the futon in one of the guest rooms in the castle. She had been staying here for the past two nights, much to her husband's dismay. Her anger over what happened was subsiding but very slowly. She hadn't gotten the chance to see Ami yet, but was still trying to figure out the words to say to her. She picked herself up and went down the hallway to the room that she shared with Akio. She looked down to see that he was sleeping soundly. He looked so peaceful there and she let out a small crack of a smile before she made her way over to the mirror and sat, grabbing a brush and taking it to her hair. She would return early enough in the mornings that way she could avoid making the fight between her and Akio noticeable.
"It's been two nights. Maybe I should let this go. Be the bigger person. Even after what he did and said, I do believe he is a good man."
There was a small knock on the door and Rin walked over to go get it. There was a servant girl who seemed no older than ten at the door with a pot of tea on a tray. Rin smiled at the small girl. She had been coming in Ami's absence in the morning.
"Thank you, I shall serve my husband his tea so you don't have to do it this morning." She said, winking at the girl. She took the tray from her and smiled.
"Have I not been making it right, Lady Rin?" The little servant girl asked concernedly, which made Rin's heart drop. Why was this young girl worried about tea? She should be outside playing and having fun.
"You've been doing just fine. Wait here." Rin said as she went inside to place the teapot down on a table. She looked over the table until she found Akio's sweet stash and grabbed out a small piece of candy. She made her way back over to the door.
"Here. For you." Rin said, smiling at the young girl as she gave her the candy. The young girl looked as if she'd been given gold. "Why don't you take the morning off and go play outside? If anybody bugs you, just say Lady Rin said so."
The girls face lit up even more and she nodded. "Thank you, Lady Rin!" She then took off like lightning down the hall.
"You just made that little brats day. I am not deserving of such a gracious and kind wife." Akio's voice took her ear, making her jump a little. Rin had thought he was asleep. She looked over to him as he stood up and started walking towards her.
"Hm. Maybe." Was all she said back to him.
"Rin.."
"Here, sit." Rin ordered. Akio obliged and made his way over to be seated by the mirror.
Rin poured some tea from the pot into a cup for him and carried it carefully over to him. She then took out the brush and started to brush his hair, not saying a word. He looked at her for a minute, intrigued that she was finally paying attention to him. The past couple of days she ignored him completely. Akio felt her fingers through his hair and sipped his tea, trying to act normal. He couldn't take it anymore; he needed to speak to her. He gently grasped her arm that held the brush, and pulled her closer to him as he turned to face her.
"Rin. I want you back here with me. It pains me to see you gone every night."
She looked at him and wilted a little at his puppy dog eyes. Akio was so handsome it was hard to resist him. But she tried, struggling to release herself.
"You don't think it pains me to sleep alone as well?" She responded, truthfully. The past two nights had been cold and lonely.
Akio then surprised her as he fell to his knees and buried his head in her legs, his hands reaching around her hips.
"Come back, my sweet. I will try to be a kinder man. I can't have this anymore, Rin. I need you with me." He whispered, breathing in her scent.
Rin looked down at him and felt herself melt at his touch. He had made her so angry but now she was just being overcome with desire. Part of her wanted to throw him off and tell him no, but the larger part of her was giving in fast. She had come to enjoy and missed their midnight hours together, becoming entangled in each other's bodies. She pressed both of her hands back on the drawer and leaned backwards against it, feeling weak at the knees. He grabbed at her bottom as he breathed her in, making her gasp.
"I want your body, Rin, right here and now." He said enticingly, and looked up at her as she breathed quickly.
"Then you shall have it." Rin whispered.
Akio became overrun with desire as he had finally won over his wife. He pushed her stomach back a little so she was completely against the dresser and lifted her kimono to throw himself under it. When he did, he began to kiss her ankles, making his way up to her delicate thin legs which brought forth a moan from her lips. He beamed at her loss of control and made his way further up.
Screams of pleasure could be heard coming from the young Lady of the castle that morning up and down the hallway. A servant crossed the room with a look on her face and continued on her route. This was definitely not the first time she had heard such cries coming from Lord Akio's room before, and it probably wouldn't be the last. She merely shrugged and kept walking.
When they finished up, Akio stood up proudly as Rin took a second to regain her composure. Akio grabbed at his tea that he had left and took a big gulp before letting out a sound of satisfaction. He started to dress himself as Rin slowly rose to her feet and went to sit at the mirror and wiped her face with a wet cloth. Neither of them said anything to the other for a couple minutes as they fixed themselves up. He looked in the mirror as he straightened his clothing out, and then looked to Rin, who was still in the nude and sitting at the mirror, brushing her hair for the second time that morning.
"So did you send back a letter to your friends?" He asked, trying to seem nonchalant.
"Yes. I told them I was fine." She responded, not really wanting to talk about it, as Akio had threatened to hurt them if they ever came around.
"You can't blame me for being upset that they tried to take you, and no less you were planning on keeping it a secret, which is unacceptable."
Rin let out a sound of frustration. She had just let go of her grudge, and now he was jumping at the chance to point of her shortcomings as if he was in any position to. She rose off of her seat and went to go grab the kimono off the ground.
"I didn't though, did I?" She asked him. He kicked her kimono away from her as she tried to pick it up, smiling to himself as if it was a joke.
"Would you have if not persuaded otherwise?" He gently grabbed her arm and pulled her to him, wrapping his arm around her.
"Maybe. I don't know. I just didn't want any issues to arise, which there clearly was." Rin said, pushing away at his chest like a cat trying to claw its way out of its Master's loving embrace. He held her still there as she growled at him. "Please, let me get dressed, Akio."
"I will retract my statements about harming your friends. As long as they do not attempt to take you, I will not be an enemy. They are welcome to come here and see you. But please, you must not try to keep any secrets from me again, my sweet." He said, rubbing his nose against her cheek as she got frustrated with his hold on her.
"Fine! I won't. Now let me go." She demanded. He released his hold on her and she stomped over to her kimono before throwing it on, looking back at Akio in frustration.
"Maybe instead of interrogating me, you should go to Ami." Rin suggested, straightening out her kimono. "Although she probably doesn't want to see you right now after what you did."
"Rin, don't say such things." Akio chided. "I am her Master. Ami would be delighted to see me." At those words, he kissed her cheek, and left her there. Akio's statement reminded her very much of Lord Sesshomaru's unwavering pompous attitude. He was in charge, and everybody should be happy about it.
Rin sighed and couldn't exactly argue with Ami's situation without being a hypocrite. She had been the same way towards Lord Sesshomaru, as far as her blind devotion. But she still couldn't imagine Ami being happy with Akio after what he did. Had Lord Sesshomaru been cruel to her, would she have stuck around and loved him like she did? She couldn't say with clarity that it would have dissuaded her from staying with him, because she was so unconditionally in love with him. But he hadn't been, which separated her former situation from Ami's. Sesshomaru had never laid a hand on her, much less whip her like that. She closed her eyes and thought of him before she shook her head at her own thoughts.
"He is no longer mine to admire. I must think of other things now."
Akio made his way down the hall, thinking of his situation with Rin. He shook his head at his own attitude. He should not have been so forward. But the other part of him was just glad that their argument was over and that she was being agreeable. He saw a servant woman carrying a bucket of salt water and a cloth down the stairs into the servants quarters.
"Come, Kira, let me take that off of you. It was meant for Ami, right?" He asked, taking the bucket out of her hands.
"Yes, my Lord. Her welts have gone down quite a bit so now I'm just making sure they don't get infected before they fully heal. She should be fine in a day."
"Thank you, Kira. I will take over here." He said, and he got a look of surprise from the servant woman.
"Very well, my Lord. If that is all I'll take my leave." She bowed before going the opposite direction.
Akio nodded and made his way down the steps. He rarely went downstairs into the servants quarters as it was unnecessary for him. He got a few worried looks and bows as he walked down the hallway past a couple rooms. He stopped at Ami's door and let himself in without knocking. When he did, he saw Ami there, lying on her stomach and looking in the opposite direction of the door. Ami heard this and spoke.
"Kira.. you don't need to visit me so often I'll be okay.." She said, closing her eyes.
Akio made his way over to the futon that she was lying on and put the bucket down. He then gently pulled back the thin sheet that was covering her, and looked at her back. He felt bad when he saw the red welts going from her back down to her bottom. Without speaking, he dipped the rag in the salt water and wrung it out. Ami didn't bother turning, as she was in a depressed state and didn't want to face anyone, including other servants.
"Kira, I wish you would not do this everyday. It stings me so." Ami whined as Akio dabbed her welts with the cloth. "I suppose I'll be healed enough by tomorrow or the next day to work. I can't stand lying here all day anymore. It gives me too much time to think."
Akio was intrigued by all these words she was speaking as she was usually quiet when he was around, so he wasn't bothering to tell her that it was him. He cleared his throat and continued without saying a word, as he was dabbing away at the very wounds he created. He felt bad about them, but didn't beat himself up over it at all. She had pushed a noblewoman, and she could have been punished much worse for such an offense if his Mother had been the one to do it.
"I've had yet another nightmare about that horrible place. I could hear them calling out to me. All of my old friends.. They died horribly and I was the one who got away. But it's almost like there is no relief in being the last one standing. Sometimes my guilt makes me wish I had just..
Ami hissed aloud when he dabbed a rather raw spot. "Just sometimes I think I should have died with the others."
Akio stopped completely and tossed the rag into the bucket and sighed, looking away from Ami. He put his hands over his face, deep in thought. He had never heard such depression coming from anybody before. And he did care for the girl, so he didn't want her to feel this way. He dropped his hands to his knees and looked at Ami as she rustled bit.
"You're so silent, Kira, I'm sorry if I make you uncomfortable with my thoughts."
"Ami.." He finally said.
Ami opened her eyes and shot up like a lightning bolt when she heard his voice. She scrambled to her knees, covering herself with her sheet.
"My Lord!" She shouted."I didn't know it was you."
"I know." He said, sitting still and looking at her for a couple minutes. "Do you trust me, AmI?"
"Of course I do. I always have." She was still in awe that he was here in her room.
"I will protect you from others… and yourself. It's been 5 years. You must surrender this guilt you carry for your lost friends. It is no fault of yours they are gone."
Ami just looked up at him with admiration and let out a small smile. He was her knight in shining armor, and no one could take that from her. He always knew the right thing to say or do.
"Come, Ami." He said, reaching out to her and pulling her onto his lap. She blushed and kept the sheet secure in her fist, as to keep herself covered. Akio began to run his fingers through Ami's hair, making her close her eyes in bliss. This was something he had been doing since he rescued her from that horrible place. He felt bad for the girl and wanted to be close to her, and from that action he had gained a great amount of love and admiration from the girl. Ami noticed that it had stopped around the time he met Rin months ago. Some might think it strange but Ami was happy to be so close to her Master again.
"Oh, Ami. You are so loyal to me. You make me very happy."
"Then I am happy, too, my Lord." She chimed in, so blinded by his touch and his flattery. "I thought you might still be angry with me."
"You are forgiven. Infact, Lady Rin wants you back with her. She still likes you very much."
Ami almost sighed aloud at this. She was hoping that she would not be going back to Rin, as it caused a bunch of trouble for her.
"Is it your wish that I go back to her, my Lord?"
"It is, Ami. You will start tomorrow morning since you are so eager to leave this bed."
"Thank you, Master." Ami said.
Akio breathed in Ami's scent, and could feel her heat through the thin sheet that covered her.
"You need to do something for me, Ami."
"What is it, my Lord?"
"I need you to be my eyes. If Lady Rin gets anymore letters, I want you to bring them to me first. Also, if she says anything you think is important for me to know, I'd like you to tell me." He ran his finger over her collarbone and she moaned lightly. So Rin had showed him the letter. It frustrated Ami more that it took what it did to convince Rin to just tell the truth.
"Of course, my Lord."
"Good. I know you will not hesitate to tell me anything that goes on. You will be rewarded for any information."
"All I want is to serve you, my Lord. Just keep me like this, please."
He felt himself become aroused by these words. It didn't help that Ami was half naked to begin with. She wasn't eleven anymore, she was a sixteen year old girl and his body took notice of this. He coughed to distract himself from feeling this way. He gently lifted Ami to his side and stood up, wanting to end this conversation before he thought more of the situation at hand.
"My loyal girl… she will always have her Master to protect her." Akio said, stroking Ami's cheek before he started to head for the door. She melted at his touch, as she usually would. This was the kind of typical scenario that Ami would find herself in. Akio swooping in to make her fall even more for his charm and flattery. Ami sat there, breathing loudly. Ami had felt his arousal and in turn, she felt it as well. She slowly began to lay back down on her futon, closing her eyes. She felt bothered in the best way possible.
"I shouldn't desire him this way.. But I can't help it.."
Ami slowly moved her hands under the sheet.
…
Rin was in the gardens, with her hair tied back, shakily holding a bow and arrow. She pulled back on the bow and released. The arrow was released from the bow with great force but it missed the target board completely. She tapped her foot in frustration before she heard someone laugh aloud and looked across the garden to see that Lady Mai had been watching and was, of course, taking her chance to poke fun.
Pulling out another arrow, Rin felt like aiming for her mother-in-law this time, but refrained. She had been out here a few times before trying to learn how to use the bow and arrow. She was her own teacher, so it wasn't exactly going well. But she knew it was important to learn how to defend herself if she ever wanted to leave the village.
"Damn! Why does Akio give me such doubt? I wish I could trust him completely, but I can't. My better instincts tell me to keep caution. I have to be able to leave if I need to. I need to have the upper hand. I can no longer be a damsel in distress."
She let another one go, again it completely missed the target. Rin growled in frustration and sat down.
"It seems that the arrow does not come naturally to you." A voice said from a few feet away. Rin looked up to see her father-in-law standing there.
"Apparently not. But I wish to master it.. so I will."
"I've never been much for bow and arrow, either. It takes a certain kind of person to master that kind of weapon. You don't seem the type. You're far too high strung." He criticized, touching her shoulder.
"Are you saying I should give up trying to learn?" Rin asked, disappointed.
"No no." Eito chimed happily, holding her scarred hand up for her to look at it. "I saw what you did to that target a while ago. You carry a high energy and brute strength. If you want to see a weapon that will be more suited to you, follow me."
Rin was curious now. She was following her father-in-law in great anticipation. He seemed excited as well, he was walking a little faster than he normally would have. They eventually came to a room inside the castle that Rin had never seen before. There were racks lined with different weapons throughout the room. She looked at some of the weapons as Eito picked some up and set them back down, struggling to even hold most.
"Why don't you try this on for size?" Eito took her hand and placed in it a long, thin sword. He took a few steps back to allow her to wave it around a little bit and get comfortable with it. Rin smiled as she looked at it. When she held the sword in her grip she thought of Lord Sesshomaru using his Baksaiga with grace and skill. She tried to hold it as he would, and smirked. Who would've thought Rin would ever be holding a sword? She knew right away that Lord Eito knew what he was talking about. It was perfect.
"It's great. It feels more natural." She said, smiling at him.
"Then it is yours, my dear." Eito said, putting his hand on her shoulder, "But I expect you to work hard at mastering it."
"Thank you!" Rin beamed happily before stopping herself. "I don't know if I should though. I wouldn't know the first thing about swords, even if I've seen them used for so long. I've never used one myself."
Eito smiled and stepped forward, excited about the girl's enthusiasm.
"I will do my best to show you how to master the sword. I am an old man, this is true. But I am not completely incapable. I taught my son and now you will learn, too. That is, if you will have me for a teacher."
"Of course!" Rin said with delight, before making herself stop. "I fear that your son will not like this arrangement though."
"I am afraid my son may have inherited some of his mother's finer qualities." Eito said sarcastically. "They are both far too used to having everything exactly as they want it. But that is no concern of yours. If it your desire to learn how to do it with or without Akio's blessing. You are an ambitious girl. You will not be dissuaded from doing what you truly want."
Rin lifted the sword and smiled at the old man. "So when do we begin?"
"Anxious girl! I will meet you here at noon tomorrow and we will begin training. I must say I am excited to have a pupil again after so long."
"And I am glad to have a teacher that I am so fond of."
Lord Eito laughed aloud and patted the girl's head as he began to walk out of the room. "I will see you tomorrow at noon, dear Rin."
Rin waved it around for a bit longer before leaving the room. She came to her room and placed it on the table, sat cross legged and stared at it for a while. She was excited for the next day to come. Learning to handle a sword was about much more than defending herself and being able to leave if she chose. She closed her eyes and thought of Lord Sesshomaru again. She already resigned herself to the fact she would never forget about him.
"I will find you again."
Rin crawled over to a big chest that was close by in the room and dug her hand under it, pulling out a small box. She crawled back over to the table and opened it, looking at the items inside. In the box were all of the things that Lord Sesshomaru had gifted her over her years with him, she sifted through it until she found her amethyst necklace. When she did, she gently wrapped it around the handle of the sword and set it back down, watching the purple glow daintily.
When she heard the door open, she snapped the box closed and looked over, expecting to see Akio. Instead, it was Ami who entered the room. Rin looked over to her and tried to find the right thing to say, but she had been caught off guard.
"I'm sorry for coming in like this. I just…" Ami was clearly anxious. She came over and sat down on her knees to be at Rin's level.
"It's okay, Ami. I'm sorry for what happened to you." Rin said, "I should have protected you."
"Please, don't be sorry. I lost myself. I deserved nothing less." Ami responded.
"No. What my husband did was awful. You bear him no ill will after that?"
"I could never bear any ill will against him. He takes care of me. He protects me."
Rin nodded and stroked the amethyst as Ami spoke. She expected this kind of response. "It's nice to know that someone is there to protect you." She agreed before sighing.
"What is this, Lady Rin?"
"Lord Eito is going to teach me how to handle a sword. He is such a good man."
"He is. But I was asking what this was." Ami gently touched the amethyst and looked at Rin with curiosity.
"Oh.. this was a gift from Lord Sesshomaru. He gave it to me a while ago."
"The demon Lord? He must have cared for you very much to gift you something so lovely as this."
"Yes. He did care for me."
"I'm sure he still does, Lady Rin."
Rin frowned, she wanted to end this conversation before she got upset.
"Well if there is nothing more to say.."
"Yes.." Ami said, standing. "Have a good evening, Lady Rin."
…..
The next morning, Rin woke up to the sound of birds chirping outside of her window. She was excited to begin training today. She looked to her side and noticed that her husband had never come home the night before, which was strange because he always did. It was not abnormal for him to miss dinner and come to bed after she was asleep. But this time he had not come at all. She shook her head and rose up to dress herself.
She heard a knock on the door and Ami entered. Rin watched her and she set down a pot of tea, not seeming confused by Akio's absence at all.
"Good morning" She chimed as she poured a cup for Rin.
"Morning… where is my husband?" Rin inquired, sipping at the tea.
"Well, he left yesterday to visit one of the neighboring villages and he hasn't returned yet." Ami said cheerfully, and sat down next to Rin. "But don't worry, that happens sometimes. He'll be back today, I'm certain."
"Oh." Rin said, dropping her worry. "Well, here, you have tea with me instead, then. I've missed having you around, Ami. I hope everything between us is okay."
"Lady Rin, I just want to forget about what happened." Ami said, pouring herself a cup of tea and sipping at it. "What time do you begin training?"
That broke Rin from her thoughts. "Noon. Just let me know when Lord Akio gets back, please."
"Of course."
…..
The sword came swinging slowly towards Rin and she placed both hands on hers and lifted it to block. She let out a grunt as she held it there with all of her strength as Eito pressed his sword down. Even though he was an old man, he was an aggressive teacher. It was the first day and she had already learned so many different things. She sweated through a simple white kimono used for sport. She breathed aloud and she pushed back and Akio's sword was pushed away from her.
Akio smiled greatly at the girl's ferocity. He hadn't had this much excitement in a long time. He placed his sword down on the rack and sighed in exhaustion.
"Dear Rin, that is enough for today. You wear out this old man."
"Old man, you exhaust me as well." She said, laughing breathily.
Rin kissed Eito on the cheek before they parted ways and she started down the hall, trying to choke back her exhaustion from such a vigorous training session. She wiped her forehead with her sleeve.
"Lady Rin!" She heard from down the hall. It was Ami, walking towards her. "Lord Akio is back, and he is in your room now."
"Thank you, Ami." Rin breathed out. "I wish to go to him alone."
Ami nodded at Rin and watched as she walked by her.
When Rin got to the room, Akio was replacing his clothing with something cleaner.
"I woke up and you weren't here." Rin said, folding her arms.
"Rin! My sweet, I am relieved to see you." Akio said, wrapping his arms around her and kissing her on the lips. He had his arms around her when he noticed her dress and the sword on her side. "What is all this?"
"Well, I started training with your father." Rin said.
Akio started laughing a bit and grabbed at her bottom. She could tell by his movements and smell that he had been drinking the night before and might still be a bit intoxicated.
"Only you, Rin, would desire to do such a thing. That's what I like about you."
"Don't mock me, Akio. I'm serious." She said, not appreciating the laughing.
"Rin, are not excited to see me?" He wrapped his hands around her hips.
"Where were you last night?"
Akio pushed away at her hips and she stumbled back a little bit, catching herself. She pushed him back with her hands.
"Why are you so difficult? I was out on business last night." He said in defense.
"Is that why you smell like sake and sweat?" She taunted him.
Akio sighed heavily, too tired to carry on such an argument.
"Yes, yes. If you wish to hear it, there was a celebration. We were making a big delivery and settling some business the Elder of the village and he wanted me to share a few drinks with him."
Rin moved herself over to the bench by the mirror and placed the sword upright by it before she sat and put her hands on her temples. She knew already that he had been out all night drinking. Why should she care? She did not love him, although it did frustrate her that he thought he could just do whatever he wanted without telling her and come home to a loving wife with welcoming arms.
"Oh Akio, don't treat me like this. My heart can't take it. I have lost so much."
Akio stopped himself and really looked at Rin, she looked so beautiful even as she was covered in sweat. He felt bad for leaving her all night like he did with no notice.
"I have shared my body with many women before, but none please me so much as when I am with her."
He took her hand and led her to the futon with him and laid down, motioning for her to lay beside him. She laid down on her side and he wrapped himself around her.
"Rin.. I am sorry." He breathed out as she took comfort in his warm body. They both fell asleep there in the middle of the day, exhausted and jaded.
…
((One year later))
"Lord Sesshomaru!" Jaken shouted. "This is all coming along so great. The base floor has already been finished and so the men say the rest will be a breeze! This crew has been working swiftly."
"Hn. The quicker it goes up, the greater the reward, they know that." Sesshomaru said, leaning up against a boulder, closing his eyes. "Another year at least, though, I presume."
"This is very exciting, my Lord."
Sesshomaru remained silent. The past year had been busy until now. Finding someone to build his estate, finding a place to build it. Getting all the finer details out of the way. Now he just had to wait. It was all being taken care of now. He didn't like being idle like this. He breathed out and figured it best if he fell asleep. He let himself doze off.
Sesshomaru stood in front of a large river, looking to either side, slightly confused. He was completely alone. A wind came through and he heard a cackle of a laugh he hadn't heard in ages fill the air. He had recognized the laugh as that of Naraku. His initial reaction was to take out his sword.
"Show yourself!" Sesshomaru demanded.
The laughing ended abruptly and Sesshomaru sniffed the air, smelling absolutely nothing. He was still on his guard, even though he knew that Naraku was dead and it couldn't possibly have been him. That was when he saw a body floating on the river, head down with the back exposed. He recognized this body. It was curvy and pale and damaged, as it had a hole where the heart should be, all bloodied and bruised.
"Kagura." He said, walking into the water to retrieve the body. "It can't be her."
The water made its way up to his waist as he finally reached the body. Sesshomaru could feel his brows tighten as he stared at the body before him. He was hesitant to turn it, as if something horrible might happen. He had witnessed Kagura die with his own eyes ages ago, yet here her body was, floating lifelessly in the river.
He breathed in and began to turn the body around slowly. What he saw made him jump back.
The face he was looking at was not that of Kagura's, but of Rin's. And it was horribly bruised and beaten with blood trickling down the lip. He began to breathe quickly as he dragged the body out of the water.
"Rin.." He said in horror. "How could.."
He laid her body down by the water and investigated it to see if she was still alive. But she was not.
"You failed to save her." The voice called again.
He became heavy with rage as he looked upon the dead body of Rin before him. He growled heavily until he became so filled with rage that his eyes turned red and his fangs grew larger. He let out a roar that filled the air.
Sesshomaru gasped and lifted his head, his eyes red with anxiety. He was still laying down by the boulder that he had fallen asleep by. He looked to Jaken, who was feeding Ah Un and let out a heavy breath before leaning back again, bringing his hand to his forehead.
"A dream? I haven't dreamt in ages." He thought to himself, still worked up from such a sight. He was relieved to know that it was not real though.
This was the first time he had thought of Rin in a very long time, he had been so distracted before. He tried to relax but Sesshomaru simply couldn't let this bad feeling go until he saw that the image was not real. He felt an irresistible urge to know that Rin was okay.
"Jaken, stay here with Ah Un. I will be back in a couple of days."
"Yes, my Lord."
…
When Sesshomaru reached his destination, he stopped himself before he took another step toward the village. He could see the castle not too far away through the trees. He thought of Rin and how she was so angry with him the last time they saw each other. Certainly she would not want to see him at all. And if he was being honest with himself, he did not want her to see him showing such concern for her, as that might start a new wave of problems.
"She cannot see me. No one can see me." Sesshomaru told himself as he flew onto the roof of the palace and waited patiently for any sign of Rin or someone who would have come into contact with her. He looked around the gardens and sighed.
"Why am I here right now? Why all of a sudden such concern? This Sesshomaru confuses himself."
But at the same time, he could not rid himself of the horrible face he had seen in his dream. He needed to see Rin's face. He needed to see that she was okay. He waited for at least two hours. He cursed himself for being so diligent.
Just then, two girls came strolling into the garden. One he remembered as the servant girl that had been listening in on his conversation with him and the Lord and Lady of the castle. He gasped when he looked to the girl next to him.
He looked at her long wavy hair and her olive skin. He took in her crooked smile and her infectious laugh as she was making conversation with the other girl. She looked so much more mature than how he had left her. She wasn't scarred, or bruised like in his dream. She was not only fine, she was lovely. Sesshomaru wanted more than ever to let her know that he was there right that second, but held himself back. He did not need her knowing this. He didn't want her to know that he had come all this way just to see her face.
"She is fine. She is okay.. Why don't I want to leave, then?"
He stayed and watched her engage and walk around for a little bit before he forced himself up to remove himself without a trace.
((Meanwhile))
"Ami. You must tell him to stop bugging you!" Rin laughed aloud.
"Lady Rin, have I not tried? He insists that it's going to happen. I tell you, all the castle guards do is flirt tenaciously with the girls who work here." Ami said, giggling to herself as well. "It's become old very quickly."
Rin sighed happily as she shook her head. Ami and her had mended their relationship well over the past year, although she made sure that she never told Ami something that Akio couldn't hear. Not that anything really came up, anyways. She hadn't heard from anyone for a very long time, and spent most of her time either with Ami or Lord Eito. She had been training very hard with her father-in-law and was already very good. The year had really gone by rather quickly and she couldn't believe that she had already been there so long. Her relationship with Akio had improved very much. He tried to be around more often, and she was doing her best to make him happy. Things right now were going as well as they could be, although the hole in her heart she felt from the beginning never really went away.
"Lady Mai has been on about you, again." Ami told Rin, making her roll her eyes.
"What about me, this time?" Rin inquired.
"She was whining to me the other day about how you have not been bearing sons for your husband." Ami said, shaking her head. "As if it is something you can simply choose not to do. I think of all people, she should know that. I've heard she did not become with child until she was already 28 years of age."
"Such a hypocrite." Rin sighed. "Besides, my husband could care less whether or not I bear him any children right now. He is far too busy to care. I could certainly wait."
Rin had no desire to have any children right now, and thought maybe she was willing her own body to avoid such things to happen. She had the feeling that she was not meant to have them. Not right now at least.
Just then, she had the weirdest sensation that she was being watched. Rin hadn't felt like this for a long time. She looked around aimlessly and up at the buildings but didn't see anything. But she could feel it. She knew that someone had been watching her. She could sense it with her whole being. Her instincts told her what it meant. She said aloud what her mind thought of this sudden feeling. Rin felt his presence. There was no doubt that he was around here somewhere watching.
"Sesshomaru.." She whispered to herself.
"What was that?" Ami asked, confused.
Rin panicked as she saw an orb of light in the distance, headed away from the village.
"I have to go, Ami." Rin ran back inside the castle and raced to her room, trying not to knock anybody down on the way. Ami followed her as quickly as she could. Rin quickly grabbed her sword and threw it in her belt and headed for the door. Ami was a short distance behind her.
"Lady Rin! Please! What are you doing?"
"Ami, I am sorry but I can't tell you." Rin said, "Now please don't follow me."
The guards looked confused as they saw the Lady of the castle race out the door. They both turned to Ami.
"What's going on?" One of them asked. "Should we be following her?"
"She asked me not to, so I guess not." Ami wasn't stupid, she knew that Rin was heading outside of the village.
Ami walked back inside and started to check the rooms for Akio.
Meawhile, Rin had reached the edge of the village and kept running. She ran through the woods until she came to a clearing and stopped, falling onto her knees when she sensed his presence.
"Am I going crazy?" She asked aloud. "Or are you here?"
Sesshomaru was up in a tree, listening to the sounds Rin was making. He peered down at her and kept his position. He saw the amethyst necklace he had given her so long ago wrapped around what looked like a sword. He was oddly surprised by the sight of a weapon on what used to be his Rin. He was more surprised to see that she kept his gift so close to her.
"Imagine me, the great dog demon, hiding from a human girl. What a joke I have played on myself." He thought.
"I know I saw you. I felt your presence." She said again, feeling hopeless and silly, while smiling to herself. "Did you come to see me?"
He still kept his silence as he sat down on the branch of the tree, listening to her voice. It was like torture, but he made himself stay exactly where he was.
Rin sat down on her bottom, and hugged her knees to her.
"So silent…" She said. "If you are here, I just want you to know that I am sorry for the things I said to you before you left. You made me so angry, but I have since forgiven you. But I have not forgotten you."
Sesshomaru felt his chest ache at her words. He hadn't felt this ache for a very long time now, and now that he was around Rin , it was happening again. He wanted it to stop.
"Please just show yourself and let me know I am not crazy." She cried.
Sesshomaru sighed and took off so quickly that she could barely see a flash of light as he flew away into the sky. But that was all Rin needed to know that it was him. She smiled to herself, wondering why after a year and a half he had come. And why he had hidden from her.
Rin grunted and threw herself onto the ground, her arms out as she stared up into the sky.
"So it was you.."
She laid there, enjoying her freedom from the village, and thought of Sesshomaru in a daze for what seemed like hours before she picked herself up onto her feet. She could see that the sun was going down and grudgingly headed back for the village.
Rin knew right away something was up when the guards didn't greet her, they simply opened up the doors for her and let her in. She took a deep breath and walked inside. Ami was already there waiting for her. When Ami saw her, she took a breath of relief and walked over to her and took her hand.
"Lady Rin, I am so relieved to see that you are okay. We sent people out earlier to look for you."
"If I wanted to be found, I would have been." Rin said, not caring very much for how anyone had felt about her absence. That was the first time she had left the village unaccompanied and she was in such a strange mood from having seen what was definitely Sesshomaru, that she was not concerned for anything but him. She let Ami hold her hand while they made their way down the hall to her room.
Ami was silent as she helped Rin put away her sword and change into another kimono. Rin enjoyed the silence as Ami brushed lightly through her hair, being careful not to get any knots. After a few minutes of this, Ami bit her lip.
"I had to tell him, you know." Ami said, putting the brush down. Rin nodded at her.
"Of course."
Just then, a few servants came in and put down a few trays of food before exiting. Akio and Rin often dined together, but not in their room. Rin took notice of the odd situation. Ami stroked Rin's hair with her hands.
"Are you okay?" She asked Rin, showing concern.
"I'm alright, thank you Ami." Rin let out a fake smile at the girl. She made her way over to sit and wait and Ami stood silently, nervously chewing at one of her fingernails.
After a few minutes, Akio showed up at the door with a blank look on his face. Ami looked over to him, waiting for him to say anything.
"Ami, I want to be alone with Lady Rin for dinner. We will not need you to serve us tonight."
Ami bowed her head and looked at Rin before exiting the room. She closed the door and tried to walk away from the room but stayed close to the door.
Rin looked down as she started to scoop out some food onto a plate and place it on Akio's side of the table. She placed some rice for him and poured some tea as he came over to sit down. He was looking at her but she refused to look back at him. She made herself a plate before she sat back and nodded. Akio grabbed his sticks and began to eat slowly, occasionally looking over at Rin.
Rin knew that he was angry, so she just avoided speaking as she slowly ate a little bit of rice. The air was so thick in the room, you could cut it with a knife. They stayed like this for several minutes before Akio put down his plate.
"Rin." He said, wanting her attention. She finally looked at him and saw that he was on edge.
"Yes." She said, acknowledging him.
"Where did you go today?" He asked as calmly as he could.
"I'm not sure." She responded, shrugging her shoulders. "In the woods."
Akio sighed at her short answer before speaking again.
"You left the village today. Why?"
"I wanted to see the outside for once."
He slammed his fist down on the table, making Rin jump. She put her bowl down on the table and looked at the floor, not wanting to eat or be near Akio when he was like this.
"Lies. We go to the river every other week."
"I wanted to be alone." Rin said frustrated.
"You could have been killed. I specifically told you not to leave the village without me."
Rin looked at him as she shrugged her shoulders. "I was fine. I am not helpless."
At these words, Akio swiped with the table with his whole arm, knocking every plate, bowl and cup to the floor. Everything that hit the floor broke into pieces. Rin gasped and looked over to Akio as he stood and turned his back to her for a moment. Her eyes were wide with surprise and uncertainty. She did not move even an inch. He turned back around and looked down at her.
"So you think one year of training with my nearly crippled father is enough experience for you to take on a whole band of thugs, yes? We both know that is not so." He shouted.
"Akio, please." She whispered loudly, hinting to him that he should calm himself and lower his voice. But he was having none of that this moment.
"Well, if that is the source of such ignorant behavior, we'll have to be rid of it. I'm going to be telling my father that you are not training with him anymore."
Rin felt the heat rush to her ears. She couldn't believe he was trying to do this to her. He knew how much she loved her sword and training with it.
"You can't do that." Rin said, rising to her feet. "I'm sorry I left the village, but nothing happened. You cannot take this away from me."
"I cannot?" He said back to her, almost as if he'd been challenged.
He started for her sword that hung on the wall and when he grabbed it, she tried to grab at it as well. He held it to him, careful not to cut himself or Rin as she tried to wrestle it away from him. He got it out of her hands and she grabbed onto the amethyst necklace in a last attempt to take it from him. The chain on the necklace broke and the necklace fell to the ground. Akio looked out the window before throwing the sword out of it.
"Looks like I can. Do not try to defy me right now, you have already done enough." He said lifting a finger.
Rin was on her knees with her broke necklace in her hands, looking at it and choking back tears. She was devastated. She didn't say a word to him. She simply pulled out her box from under the chest and placed her necklace back in, closing the box and replacing it.
"You will be not be leaving the castle for the next few days. I have already alerted the guards not to let you pass the front doors. And they will stop you."
"Why are you doing this to me?" Rin cried, slamming her fist into the floor.
"Is it not obvious? Rin, you swore that you would not leave without me. You swore. My heart was destroyed when I was sitting here, wondering what would become of you. Wondering whether or not my men would find you before the vagabonds did. You defied me. That's why I'm doing this."
Rin was running on anger and sadness. Whether or not what he was saying was the truth, she couldn't respect his way of dealing with this. She stood up and went over to him, looking him in the eyes.
"Your heart? No! You know very well it was your pride that was struck! Don't you dare claim to have a heart right now!" She shouted at him angrily.
A loud sound echoed in the room. Rin was thrown back by the vicious slap that had come down on her cheek. A second one came down, connecting with her nose and lip. She gasped and placed her hands over her face. Her body was in defense mode and her mind was too shocked to think straight.
Akio stood there in shock for a moment, and looked at Rin, surprised and angry. He hadn't meant to lash out at Rin like that, but he had. He couldn't believe himself. He looked at his hands and then back to Rin.
"Rin.." He said before he stumbled out of the room. Ami was at the side of the door looking terrified, she had obviously heard everything. She bowed her head at him when she saw him looking at her. He slammed the door behind him and stormed down the hall. She waited until he was completely out of sight before rushing into the room.
When Ami came into the room she saw Rin there on her knees, with one hand over one side of her face, and the other working hard at picking up all the smashed china bowls and plates off the floor. She didn't even bother looking at Ami as she tried to distract herself with this task.
"Lady Rin, please, I'll take care of this." She offered, kneeling down by her to finish picking up the pieces that were left.
"Just let me, Ami." Rin said, looking up and moving her hand down to pick up the last piece. Ami looked shocked.
"Kami! Rin! Your face. Come." Ami said, trying to pull Rin up to sit on the bench.
"No, Ami, please." Rin choked back tears and pulled her hand back.
Ami fell to her knees and wrapped her arms around Rin in a comforting fashion as Rin began to tremble and cry aloud. When she released her, she got together a white sheet and dipped it in some water and began to dab Rin's face as she cried. The right side of her face was red and puffy and her lip was bleeding. Ami's heart sank at the sight of it.
"I'm sorry this happened." Ami said, helping Rin to stand on her feet.
Ami cleaned up the rest of the mess on the floor as Rin sat down on the bench, not daring to look in the mirror at all. She didn't want to see any evidence of what just happened. She had had such a good year with Akio, and it had all been destroyed in one day. She didn't know what to do or say anymore. She stayed silent and so did Ami.
"Rin, why have you pushed him to this?" Ami thought while finishing up a couple things around the room. "Lord Akio is not a monster. And yet.." She looked at Rin's face and shook her head.
"Would you like for me to stay here for the night?" Ami asked, trying to be helpful.
"No, I'm okay, Ami. Thank you."
When Ami left for the evening, Rin stood up and made her way over to pick up her box of gifts from Lord Sesshomaru and made her way onto her futon. She curled up with the box in her arms, holding on to it for dear life.
"Sesshomaru. Oh, it was nice to know that you were there today. I needed that. But.. what am I to do now?" She thought.
"What am I going to do?"
(( I know! Super lonnnnggg chapter but I wanted to get so much in that it had to happen that way. Thank you for reading. Hopefully the next chapter won't take as long.))