Have I mentioned how much I adore imprinting? Because I do. This chapter is all about the concept of imprinting – what it is, how it works, and its importance. Most of the information I have is from the Twilight Saga Wiki and from my own ideas and thoughts about it.

Also, Annie's research is basically based off of my own research; the definitions of imprinting were found on Google. My information about Hodgkin's Lymphoma is from cancer.(GOV) and mayoclinic.

Edit: I apologize if anyone got the update for this more than once; I had to repost the chapter several time because of spelling/grammar issues.

Chapter 13:

"I have found the one whom my soul loves." – Song of Solomon 3:4

Stratford Household, Forks, Washington:

Imprint: (noun) – 1. A mark made by pressing something onto a softer substance so that its outline can be reproduced. 2. A printer's or publisher's name, address, and other details in a book or other printed item.

Imprint: (verb) – 1. To impress or stamp (a mark or outline) onto a surface or body. 2. (of young animal) come to recognize (another animal, person, or thing) as a parent or other object of habitual trust.

Curled up under the nest of pillows and blankets in my bed, I scowled at my computer screen.

Three weeks had passed since my last encounter with Seth, and I hadn't seen him, the pack, or any of the imprints since that night. Well, I guess that wasn't exactly true. Every once in a while when I would glance out my window, I would catch a glimpse of tan fur hidden in the trees behind the house, but every time that I would try to look closer, it would disappear. I knew that he was out there, but I just couldn't bring myself to climb down the stairs and walk out the front door to get to him. It was all for the best, I supposed. Better to stay away so I could eventually forget –

But my mind wouldn't let me forget - that was the whole problem.

I stretched my hands, feeling the knuckles in my bony fingers crack as I made to search again for more information, though I doubted I would find any. On a whim, I opened a search engine homepage and typed, 'Imprints Quileute Legends.' Several websites popped up, and I clicked on the first link.

According to the ancient Quileute stories, imprinting is the involuntary mechanism by which the Quileute warriors find their supposed 'soul-mates.' It is a profound and intimate phenomenon that exists among Quileute shape-shifters.

"Okay," I murmured to myself. "But that doesn't tell me anything." I scrolled down a bit, and continued my research.

Supposedly, according to legend, the first 'documented' record/portrayel of imprinting was in the case of warrior-chief Taha Aki and his Third Wife. Taha Aki, a proud Quileute chief and one of the first shape-shifters, went through three wives, the first two of whom preceded him in death.

"Still not giving me an explanation," I mumbled. I returned to Google and clicked the next link, hoping for better results.

When a shape-shifter imprints a specific person, he becomes unconditionally bound to her for the rest of his life. It is said that the experience is akin to being gravitationally pulled toward that person while a glowing heat fills up the body. The connections that the wolf had made throughout his life are severed, or become simply secondary, and the only thing left that matters is the imprintee, leaving the shape-shifter with a deep desire to do anything to protect and please this person.

What would happen if a wolf is rejected by his imprintee is unknown, though this is assumed to be virtually impossible by most experts. The imprinter is deemed to be the "perfect match" to the imprintee; he will be anything she may want or need, making any rejections highly unlikely. In the case that it does happen, however, the imprinter may feel unspeakable pain.

The Most Sacred Law: If an imprintee were killed, the imprinter would never be able to forgive or forget the person responsible for her death. In the case of the killer being another pack member, whether purposefully or on accident, the inevitable result would be a fight to the death. To avoid feuding bloodshed within the pack, it is said that the Quileute's have established their most sacred and strictly followed law because of their imprints: no wolf may kill a fellow wolf's imprinted one. No exceptions.

I shut my laptop, not bothering to close out of the open windows I had left on the screen. My fingers tapped against the top of the computer, nails having been bitten down almost completely to the stubs. I climbed out of bed with a little difficulty and sat in my rocking chair near the window, glancing out toward the trees to catch a glimpse of a werewolf. Nothing was there.

I don't know why I was surprised at what I read. After all, Emily had specifically told me that the longer I stayed away form Seth, the worse the pain would feel. Hell, I could have guessed that on my own, especially if the squeezing in my chest was anything to be considered.

I hadn't slept well in days, my appetite was slim to none, and every single time I felt myself hesitatingly falling into an uneasy sleep, I would jolt awake for some unknown reason. I had spent hours just staring at the ceiling, memorizing every spot and blemish. I had a feeling that Eli was starting to think that I was depressed, especially since I hadn't even told him anything that had happened the night of the bonfire. Everything in my body urged me to run out into the woods like a maniac, screaming Seth's name and begging him to give me a chance to explain why I was afraid of 'forever.'

But then there was another part of me that was battling back in full force, claiming that it was better for Seth to just find someone else –

Which was impossible, I had realized, since imprinting was apparently this unchangeable force. That little tidbit was the first piece of information I was able to gather from my research. Imprinting was permanent. It could not be forced on anyone or changed to a different person, no matter how much the imprinter or imprintee would want it. Denying it would just mean pain for both parties involved.

Which left me in the position to make an impossible decision.

I didn't understand imprinting as much as I wanted to and I still wasn't sure why, of all people, Seth imprinted on me when there were tons of people that were probably better suited to be with him. However, I also knew that if I didn't want to go mentally insane and cause myself even more pain then was actually necessary, I needed to swallow whatever fragile pride I had, get rid of my stubbornness, and come clean to Seth. I wasn't sure how he would react, but hiding it from him was more trouble than it was actually worth. He had sucked up his own fear and confessed his secrets to me fully knowing that I would probably react badly, but he had still told me because he believed that I deserved to know.

And I had completely screwed everything up. I had no idea why fate would have Seth imprint on me when I was sick. I mean, surely somebody up there knew I was sick – why would they pair a werewolf with a sickly human?

I swallowed against the lump that had suddenly appeared in my throat. I needed to talk to Seth. I needed to tell him –

Tell him what? a snide voice inside my head asked. How you're a liar? How you're a terrible person for hiding life-changing secrets from him?

Life really sucked sometimes.

Keeping my secret from Seth hurt just as much as I expected it would hurt to actually tell him, but at the same time, just being around him made me feel better. Would it be selfish of me to tell him just so I could keep him around longer? Just so I could have someone to lean on in case things went bad?

Tomorrow I would be making the trip back up to Port Angeles for my second treatment, and then they would – hopefully – say that I was stable enough to be able to take my treatments at home. I wasn't sure what they would tell me – if I was getting better, worse or staying the same – but I knew one thing for sure: I wanted Seth to be there with me.

I needed to tell him. Now.

Taking in a huge breath and gripping the arms of my rocking chair, I stood, feeling forty years older than I actually was. I made my way out of my bedroom and trailed my way down the stairs to the living room where Eli was passed out on the couch while a rerun of NCIS played on the TV in the background. I stopped, leaning on the back of the couch as I shook him awake. "Eli… Eli, wake up."

His eyes shot open at the sound of my voice. "Annie?" He sat up, suspiciously studying the dark circles under my eyes. "What's wrong, are you okay? What are you doing awake? What time is it?"

"I'm fine, I couldn't sleep, and it's almost two AM," I answered. "Why don't you go to your room and get some sleep?"

He rubbed his eyes and yawned. "You're the one who should be sleeping. Why aren't you in bed?"

"I was thirsty. I just wanted to get myself a glass of warm milk or something," I lied. "Why don't you head to your room and get some sleep?"

"Do you want me to make it for you?" he asked, standing. He stretched, bracing his back on his hands. "You can go sit in bed and I'll bring it up to you."

"Eli, you're exhausted. Go and get some sleep. I can take care of myself," I urged, ushering him towards his room. "Besides, I think I might watch a little TV or something until I get tired."

If he wasn't so tired he might have argued a bit more with me, but instead he just nodded his head. He kissed my forehead. "Call me if you need anything."

"I will, I promise."

Waiting until his bedroom door was completely shut and I heard him climb into bed, I unlocked the front door, feeling a sudden dizziness hit me once I set foot outside. "Okay, Annie," I whispered, giving myself a pep talk. "Breathe." I fought against my dizziness, making my way over to the steps and taking them one at a time.

Once I reached the bottom step, I had to sit down. I bent over and rested my head in between my knees, taking in greedy lungful's of air. "Get up!" I ordered myself. "You have to do this." I pushed myself to my feet, and made my way toward across the yard.

I knew it was kind of stupid to be wandering around at night in only my pajamas, but I was hurting and desperate. Right at that moment, I would settle for whatever contact with Seth I could get, even if it was through another one of the wolves. And I knew one of them were there, listening. I just knew it.

"Seth?" I asked into the quiet night. I scanned the trees for any sign of movement, taking a few steps closer. "Someone? Come on, I know one of you is out there."

The wind rustled the branches of the trees, and an owl hooted softly in the distance, but there was nothing else.

I mentally cursed myself. One of them was out there, I could feel it. "Please," I begged, my voice beginning to get high and desperate. The wave of guilt that swept over me was completely over-whelming, making my stumble and fall onto my knees in the dirt. I was in the wrong, I knew I was. All my fault, all my fault. "Please, I just need to talk to you, to explain. I'm so sorry; this is all my fault."

I would have missed it if I hadn't been paying close attention. The leaves of one of the bushes startling rustling slightly, and a pair of eyes peered out at me from between the trees.

"Please," I said, reaching out a hand into the open air. "Seth?"

The wolf stepped out of the trees, it's tan fur clumped with dirt. Seth slowly made his way toward me, stopping a few feet away. My lower lip trembled.

"Can you…" I swallowed, "Can you change back? We need to talk. Please, Seth."

He shook his head, blinking at me. His eyes seemed dead. My guilt increased.

I wanted to move to my feet and take a step forward, but found that I couldn't move. A sob escaped my throat, emotion flooding through my lungs. "There's so much I have to tell you, Seth. Why I'm always tired and why I'm so skinny and look like I'm sick. There's so much, so much that I've been keeping from you because I don't want you to get hurt, but all I've managed to do is hurt both of us in the process."

He cocked his head to the side, taking a small step forward.

"You might completely hate me for keeping this from you, and I wouldn't blame you if you do. All I've done so far is push you away because I thought I would be able to save both of us from being hurt, but I've made it all worse."

He took another few steps forward, and he was close, so close that I could reach out and touch him if I wanted to, and man, did I want to. My skin burned as I was struck with an unmistakable feeling of want; I wanted him, for as long as he would let me have him.

One touch. Just one touch and I knew I would feel better. I felt safer just being near him, and I already felt a bit of my strength returning as my dizziness started to subside. Just as the very tips of my fingers brushed against a strand of his fur, he turned and walked back to the forest. I sat there, dumbfounded, unable to do anything as I pathetically watched him walk away. "Seth," I whispered brokenly, "Please don't go."

But he was gone.

My knees gave out and I fell backwards, unable to keep myself upright any longer, landing hard as I sat backward onto my calves. It had gone too far, I had screwed up, and he didn't want anything to do with me. He had given up on me and I honestly couldn't blame him for doing so.

I felt pathetic and heartbroken, and the worst thing was that I knew I had no one to blame but myself.

But then I was swept upward into a very tight and comfortable warm embrace. I cried into his chest, managing to choke out, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." I could feel the warmth of his hand on my back through my pajama shirt, his tight embrace keeping me locked against his body. My arms managed to wrap around his neck of their own accord, knotting themselves into a tight embrace, fingers playing with the edges of his hair.

When I looked back on it, I wasn't entirely sure how long we stayed in that position. It could have been seconds, or even hours, but eventually my crying ceased and I was brought back into reality with a single thought in my mind:

Seth, I have cancer.

I sniffed, pulling back a bit to look into his face and being struck with the realization that this was the worst I had ever seen him. His eyes were red and puffy, surrounded by horrific bags and dark circles. He was covered in dirt, and there were several leaves hanging out of his hair from his time spent in the trees. I choked out a laugh and brushed them away with my hand and onto the ground.

"There's something I need to tell you," I started, my voice soft and shaky. "It's really important and I've tried my hardest to keep it from everyone up until now. I don't know how you'll take it, but I can't keep it from you anymore. It explains everything – why I was so hesitant to be your friend, why I don't like the thought of forever, and why I freaked out about the imprint. Please don't hate me for keeping this from you, but –"

Seth, I have cancer.

"Listen to me," Seth interrupted, before I could get the words out. "I love you."

"Seth –"

"You don't have to say it back, I just need you to know that, okay?" he continued, letting our fingers thread together. "I love you so much more than I've ever loved anyone or anything else in the whole world. Whatever you're hiding isn't going to change the way that I feel about you. Nothing could ever change that."

Seth, I have cancer.

"Seth," I said, breath hitching in my throat as I lifted my eyes to look into his, "I have cancer."

In the movies when big news is dropped, there's this huge moment of explosive energy. Music swells in the background as the characters are struck with the realization that things are never as they seem. It's noisy, it's rough, it's painful. It feels as if the entire world is listening in on that one sentence that brings about the climax of the story.

But now, sitting there in the dirt with Seth, there was nothing but silence.

I struggled to find my voice and speak. "It's a type called Hodgkin's Lymphoma," I explained, figuring that I might as well get the whole story out before I lost my courage. "It's a cancer of the immune system. My lymphatic cells aren't doing what they're supposed to be doing; developing and dividing more rapidly than they should be. Really common, actually; more than 9,000 cases a year, and I just happened to be one of those 9,000."

Seth was quiet. His jaw was clenched, and his hands were shaking uncontrollably as they fell to grip my shoulders.

"I moved to Forks because my doctor said that fresh air would be good for my health. The day you wanted to hang out, that Saturday, was the day I started chemo. I have to go back to Port Angeles tomorrow for another treatment, but hopefully they'll start me on home care so I don't have to go all the way up there twice a month."

His eyes fluttered shut as he leaned forward, resting his forehead against mine.

"Seth? Please say something."

He slowly started to shake his head. A shudder went through his entire body. "No. Annie, that's not funny."

I frowned. "What?"

"Don't… don't lie about something like that. That isn't funny."

He thought I was lying? Why in the world would I lie about something like this? "Seth, I… I'm not lying."

His eyes flashed; his grip on my shoulders grew tighter. "Tell me you're joking," he begged desperately. "Please just tell me this is some huge joke."

"I wouldn't joke about something like this," I responded.

"No," His head fell into the crook of her neck. "No, no, this can't be happening."

"Seth –"

"I can't – I can't believe this."

My heart sank.

"I just… Oh, God, Annie this whole time you were sick. I knew something was wrong, but I could never figure out what it was; I could smell it on you, like poison in your blood, but I never realized." He shuddered, pulling her closer to his chest. "I'm so sorry."

I let out a laugh of disbelief, my palms resting flat on his warm chest. "Why are you sorry? It's not as if it's your fault."

"I know I couldn't have been making it easier for you, and… and… How could I have not figured it out?" he asked miserably. "Oh, God… I should have been able to piece it together but I couldn't, and…"

"Seth, it's okay," I responded, reaching around to rub his back the same way he rubbed mine. "Everything is going to be okay."

"No, it's not okay." Seth let out a shaky breath, increasing the pressure of his hand on my back as he gently pulled me to my feet. "We need… I need to get you out of the cold. You shouldn't be out here when it's freezing like this."

"No, I don't want to leave you again," I told him in response, tightening my grip around him. I couldn't be away from him anymore. Now that he knew, he really knew, I knew that to lose him would be to have my heart broken. I wasn't sure if I was strong enough to go through that.

He swung me up into his arms as if I weighed nothing. "Neither of us is going anywhere ever again. I'll stay with you until you don't want me to be near you anymore."

I buried my face in his neck, taking comfort in his warmth and the promise behind his words. "I never want to be away from you again."

"You never have to, Annie. I promise."

My twelve-year old self would have never believed me if I had told her that I would eventually be letting a half-naked, Native American werewolf-shape-shifter sleep in my room with me, but sure enough, there I was curling into my massive pile of pillows watching as Seth pulled my blankets up to my shoulders before awkwardly standing next to the bed.

"Uh," he said, gesturing to the piles of mud that had clumped onto his skin, "I'm kind of… dirty."

"I don't care," I responded, patting the bed next to me. I waited until he settled himself onto the mattress before asking, "When was the last time you took a shower?"

He crinkled his nose. "Uh, two weeks ago? I think?"

I made a face. "Seth, that's disgusting. Haven't you been home?"

He had the decency to look sheepish as he turned on his side to face me, trailing circles on my hand. "Uh, the last time I went home was probably the last time I had a shower."

"Seth!" I hissed, my voice sounding a bit dull after all of my crying. "Your mother is probably worried sick."

Seth frowned. "Yeah, probably, but the guys have been giving her updates. I couldn't stay away from you," he admitted, moving closer to wrap an arm around my waist. He pulled me flush against his chest. "I knew you needed time, but I had to be at least close to you."

"Have you slept?"

"On and off a bit," he answered, kissing my forehead and the top of my hair. "Have you been sleeping? You look tired."

"I'm always tired," I mumbled, tossing a hand over his waist. "But I haven't been able to sleep well that much." I bit my lip before continuing, "I've been doing a lot of soul-searching lately; and I did a bit of research on imprinting, too."

"And what have you found out?"

"Not much," I responded. "I know that it's permanent and powerful."

He was quiet, as if he was intensely pondering my words. When he finally spoke, his voice was low and hesitant. "Are you… okay with this?"

"Do you want my honest answer?"

"Always," he stated immediately, his hand tightening on my skin. "All I want is for you to be honest with me."

Over the past few days I had spent a lot of time tossing back and forth the pros and cons or imprinting, and I had come to my own conclusions on how I felt, what I wanted to know, and how much I wanted from Seth. "At first I wasn't really comfortable with the idea," I started out. "I was scared because… Okay, do you mind if I'm just really blunt with you?"

"Go for it."

"I was just completely terrified because I honestly don't know how much time I have left."

He winced, burying his face in my neck.

"I'm serious," I continued, stroking my fingers through his thick hair. "I could only have a few months left, or maybe I'll live for another fifty years. I just don't know. I had never really thought about forever, because I never really felt that I had forever. Am I making sense?"

Seth just nodded, his nose brushing against my skin.

"Even before I knew about the whole imprinting thing, I didn't want to have to put anyone through that. I thought it would be better that the less people I knew, the less people would have to suffer if I – if something happened to me." I paused, running my thumb over his cheek and jawline. "I didn't want to hurt you, which is why I tried so hard to stay away from you. But God you were so stubborn. And I couldn't even understand why, because all I had done was push you away and you just kept coming back."

He choked out a laugh, pulling back to rest his forehead against mine. His eyes were closed and his eyelashes fluttered as his eyes moved under his lids.

"I still don't want you to have to go through this and if I'm being honest, if I had the choice, I would tell you to find someone else."

At that, Seth's eyes shot open. "Annie…"

"Please just let me finish," I begged. "It would kill me to see you be with someone else, but if I had the choice… if I thought it would save you the pain of having to see me suffer, then I would tell you to imprint on someone else a thousand times over."

His eyes were pained. "Please don't say things like that."

"I understand how permanent the imprint is, though. How we're supposedly… soul mates. I know how painful it is for us to be away from each other, especially the last few weeks. But now I just… I can't imagine my life without you in it anymore." My hands wrapped around his neck and my head fell forward against his chest. "And if that makes me a horribly selfish person, then so be it. I've lost the energy to care anymore."

All at once it seemed that my exhaustion from the past few weeks had swooped in on me. I felt my eyelids drooping, but I forced myself to stay awake. There was one last thing that I needed to discuss with him before I fell asleep. "Come with me to the hospital."

"Are you sure you want me to go with you?"

"Yes," I replied assuredly. "It's not going to be nice, though. I'm going to be pretty out of it for the next two days."

Seth was very quiet as he stroked my hair, lulling me to the brink of dreamland. "Do you remember what I told you the night you first met the pack?"

"A lot of things were said that night. You'll have to be more specific."

"I told you that whatever it was you were going through that I was going to fight it for you," he responded. His voice was soft and soothing. "I know that there isn't much that I can do, but I'm sure as hell going to do what I can. I'm not going to let you go through this alone, and I'm going to do as much as I can to ease your pain, I promise. If you want me there, I'll be there."

I didn't get a chance to respond. With a combination of my mental and physical exhaustion and Seth's warm embrace, I was already asleep.

Clearwater Household, La Push, Washington:

Sue Clearwater hated being left out of the loop.

It had been quite a strange week. Ever since the bonfire it seemed that the entire pack had been turned on its head. No one was really sure what to do. Her son's imprint, Annie, had taken the news about the La Push pack as well as could be expected, but when she was told about the imprint… Everything had changed. Something inside of her had snapped at the very thought of some magical bond. Emily said that she believed Annie was afraid of the something that was so permanent, and Sue had to agree with her. It hadn't been until the word 'forever' had left Seth's mouth that Annie's entire demeanor changed.

After Emily had taken her home, no one had seen a sign of Annie for weeks. Sue also hadn't heard from her son since that night, either, though Leah and several of the other pack members were making sure she was kept updated on how the situation was progressing. Apparently, Seth had taken permanent refuge outside of Annie's house, desperate for some semblance of contact with her. He was taking what little he could get, and Sue didn't blame him; she couldn't imagine the pain he was feeling.

This is how things had been the last three weeks, but finally… Something changed. She had been roused out of a restless sleep at four o'clock in the morning by a sharp banging at her front door. She was hesitant about answering it, being alone in the house since her daughter was on patrol and her son was… well, Seth was basically Missing In Action.

Moving quietly through her house, she poked her head through the curtain. Her eyebrows shot to her hairline at seeing the dirty and disheveled outline of her son at the door, and she hurried to open it. He looked terrible. His eyes were pained and sad, red-rimmed and outlined in deep bruised circles. He was dirty from head to toe, dripping wet from the rain, with bits of mud and leaves sticking to his skin and in between the strands of his hair.

Sue covered her mouth in shock at the sight of her son, knowing in her heart that he was in serious pain. He rubbed the back of his neck and greeted softy, "Hi, mom."

"Oh, Seth." She lunged forward and wrapped him in a tight embrace, attempting to give him the sort of comfort that only a mother could.

His arms draped over her half-heartedly, patting her back. "I'm so sorry that I've been gone. Things are going to be different from now on, I swear."

She ushered him inside and shut the door. "What happened? Is Annie okay? Are you okay?"

He frowned, his face blank and utterly emotionless. "Do you mind if I go take a shower and then we can talk?"

"Of course, sweetheart," she responded, nudging him in the direction of the bathroom where he could clean himself off. "I'll make you something to eat, okay."

"I'm not that hungry, actually. I won't be long."

Sue stared after him as he disappeared into the bathroom. She waited until she heard that telltale creak of the old pipes that let her know he had climbed into the shower before making him a few sandwiches anyway, if only to have something to keep her hands busy.

Suddenly, there was a loud bang from upstairs as if someone was beating against house, making Sue jump as several pictures on the walls rattled. She heard Seth let out an anguished shout. A few tears slipped out of her eyes, hating to know that her baby was hurting and there was nothing that she could do about it. She wiped them away as she paced through the kitchen, waiting for her son to come back down the stairs.

Sue wished that Harry was still alive and there with her. If he were there, he would know what to do. Harry and Seth always did have a close relationship, and Harry always knew what to say to make a situation better. He would have been the best person to help Seth, because Sue honestly didn't know what to say to this pitiful human being that her once cheerful son had become.

Seth was in the shower for more than an hour, and by the time he had come out, Leah had arrived back home from patrol, curious as to why every light was on when her mother should have been fast asleep.

"Let him tell us at his own pace," Sue urged her daughter.

From where she was perched on the edge of the couch, impatiently tapping her foot, Leah scowled. "If he doesn't tell us what happened, I'll kill him."

"Leah…" Sue reprimanded, "Not a good time."

Leah just pinched the bridge of nose to ward off an oncoming headache. "This is ridiculous, mom. And you know it."

Sue did know it. However, she also knew that the imprint was powerful and there was no way to stop Seth's pain over – whatever it was that had happened in the past twelve hours.

"Would you sit down and stop pacing?" Leah ordered, "You're making me nervous."

Sue did as she was told, taking the empty seat next to her daughter on the large couch.

"The water just turned off," Leah commented, glancing toward the ceiling. "He's coming down now."

Sure enough, ten minutes later Seth came slowly trudging down the stairs. He didn't look at his mother or his sister as he made his way through the living room, sitting on the floor in between them.

It was quiet.

Sue sighed, reaching out to kneel in front of her son, resting her hand on his cheek. "Oh, my poor baby. What happened?"

Seth looked up, his eyes glassy. "She's… she's really sick, mom."

Leah leaned forward a bit as they waited for Seth to elaborate.

He opened his mouth to speak and answer their unspoken questions, but choked, only managing to get out one word: 'Cancer.' And for the first time since he was fourteen years old, Seth Clearwater wrapped his arms around his mother, leaned his head on her shoulder, and cried.