I'm just gonna leave this here...

Chapter 13

A short time later Cisco was back in the chair. Joe had arrived, and the entire group was assembled.

"You sure you don't want to run some more tests?" Cisco adjusted his glasses again and laid back nervously.

Martin smiled. "Nothing we do could ever quite simulate this, Cisco. Let's just try it and see what happens. Remember, find the frequency of the metal first, and then try to project the world frequency over it."

"Okay." Cisco tried to breathe a few times, repeating his mantra. "Use the force, use the force, use the force."

Martin's voice was calm and reassuring. "You just need to feel. Feel the vibrations, Cisco. Tune into them. Then push them out. You can do this."

Cisco looked at the group gathered around. Iris gave him a supportive nod and smile. Joe was trying too hard to look casual about this, and Caitlin and Ronnie were practically radiating positive thoughts.

Cisco heaved a deep breath and closed his eyes. Martin carefully placed the metal fragment in his open hand. "Just feel the vibrations. Focus only on them."

For several minutes there was only the sound of Cisco's deep breathing. Then he twitched in surprise, a startled gasp interrupting his focused breathing, but he quickly rallied and resumed. "I feel…something. I see…" His voice drifted off as he worked to intensify what was happening.

Images began to flow through his head again, but he was getting better at finding the one he wanted. He focused on all three of the pieces, sitting on a table somewhere. He had worked specifically on tuning into the pieces themselves and less their surroundings. Where they were and who was with them mattered less than Barry being aware that they were being connected with and broadcasted over. He could feel them begin to vibrate. This was the wake-up call, the signal to them that Cisco was trying to provide Barry with a way to get home.

He breathed again. Feel the force…that advice really did work…now feel the air. Feel this world's frequency. He thrust aside the niggling self-doubt and focused on creating a beam of frequency based on the vibrations of the air. He could almost picture it focusing together and flowing over the telegraph he'd already established with the piece. C'mon Barry, get what we're trying to do…c'mon Barry…

After Barry got off work, he and Bear and Iris had headed straight to S.T.A.R. Labs, hoping that something might happen that evening. Harrison and Tess were there as usual, and everyone else employed there had gone home. Bear couldn't take waiting around the apartment for the rest of the night. He was wearing his suit just in case. He was leaning against a console, chatting with Barry and Iris, when Harrison suddenly shouted from across the cortex.

"Bear get over here!"

Bear raced across the cortex to the table Harrison was looking at, followed quickly by Barry and Iris.

Harrison was pointing to all three pieces of metal on the table. They were shimmering. No, they were vibrating just enough to be seen. Bear suddenly couldn't breathe. "Oh, this is it."

Harrison's eyes were gleaming with excitement. "This is it, Bear. Are you ready?"

Bear nodded, mouth dry. "Yeah."

"Then do what you do best." Bear looked up. Harrison was smiling at him, eyes alight with anticipation and excitement. "Run, Barry, run."

Bear swallowed and stared at him for a fraction of a moment. It was too familiar. He couldn't shake the feeling that Eobard was looking back at him. He'd had that same look many times before. Bear shook off the sudden discomfort that laid over him and went to Barry and Iris, giving each a hug, and then Tess. Each wished him safe travel. Harrison offered his hand, which Bear shook.

Bear picked up the smaller metal fragment and moved to leave the cortex, heading for the hallway that led down to the particle accelerator itself, and looked back one last time. Iris and Barry were holding hands and beaming at him. Harrison had an arm around Tess for a moment, then moved to pick up one of the larger pieces and follow Bear.

The walk to the pipeline area was silent. Both men were aware of the enormity of what they were about to attempt. Bear pushed away memories of the last time he had made this walk. Once he made it all the way to the accelerator floor, he looked back up at Harrison, who was standing on the upper level. The only thing missing was Eobard's pipeline cell.

Harrison's voice echoed down to him. "Bear, focus on the piece in your hand. If we're right, Cisco is broadcasting the frequency of your world over it. Your secondary frequency isn't gone yet so you should be able to lock onto it and use it to phase. Don't focus on the piece, focus on what's coming through the piece."

"Got it." Bear swallowed, his hand clenching on the fragment.

"Good luck."

"Thank you." Bear looked up, avoiding Harrison's gaze, and then pulled his hood into place. He bounced on the soles of his feet for a moment, loosening his muscles and readying to run. Then he started running.

The first few laps were basically warm up, and he tried not to notice when he passed the spot where the wormhole had opened up in his world. He also tried not to think about what had happened after that. He increased his speed, going faster and faster. When it felt like a good baseline, he allowed his focus to drift to the metal in his hand, letting his running go on autopilot navigating turns as he went loop after loop.

He could tell his singularity frequency was still there, if less, because it was far easier to move past the frequency of the piece itself and look for anything else coming through. He raced countless laps as he reluctantly allowed Eobard's voice to echo in his mind.

"Breathe…breathe" He let the metal piece lay loosely in his grip, feeling for a broadcasted frequency.

"Feel the air…feel that wind on your face…" Bear could feel it, but he could also feel vibrations rolling off the piece that weren't there a moment before. He suppressed a thrill of excitement, not wanting to get so distracted that he lost it.

He had no idea how many laps he had run by now, but it didn't matter. He could feel the lightning. He could feel the air. He could feel his cells, every one, in a state of excitement, ready to phase. He let the vibrations from the piece run up his fingers, through his arm and into his body, flooding it with the frequency of his own world. Home…

He was ready. He was starting to phase. It was more gradual than usual, and Bear could feel the extra effort it took, the extra distance of an entire dimension he was trying to cross.

But it was working. Every lap around so far he had seen Harrison standing above, just like Eobard had. But every few laps, Harrison wasn't there. Every few laps, Bear could see moonlight filtering in through a hole in the roof that was there in one world, but not in this one.

Spurred by the success, he allowed Eobard's voice to replay in his head as he focused even harder. Whispers and advice and memories he had shut down long ago once he realized that Wells was a murderer and a fake now came to life.

"I may not care about people, Barry, but I care about you." "You can do this, Barry, I believe in you." Not even those memories could diminish this moment.

On the upper level, Harrison raised his arms, excited beyond measure. "It's working!" His voice was exultant. "It's working!"

Bear was phasing home.

Iris stood next to her father, hand in her pocket clenching her metal piece so tight her fingers were going numb. She watched Cisco closely, desperate for some kind of sign. This has to work. It has to. Her father glanced down at her, and she could read the same thoughts in his eyes. His arm went around her.

Minutes passed in tense silence. No one wanted to interrupt or disturb the process, but the waiting was becoming unbearable.

Suddenly Caitlin pointed at a monitor screen. "Oh!" The others rushed to it. Cisco twitched in his chair but didn't open his eyes.

It was camera feed from a camera down in the accelerator, the same one they had been using to watch Barry time travel. The chamber stood empty and partially lit. But as Iris watched, she began to pick up a regular discrepancy. She moved closer to the monitor, and the others crowded around her.

There, in the middle of the chamber, a quick blur raced past the camera every few seconds. With every lap as the group watched, the blur became slightly more distinct. First just barely seen, next clearly human but transparent, next transparent human in a red hazy suit. Glitching and skipping, the speedster was starting to fill out into reality.

Barry was slowly phasing into this world, one lap at a time.

"It's working." Martin's voice was hushed, as if afraid to jinx it. He moved back to Cisco's side. "Keep going, Cisco, it's working!" Cisco made no reply, but his muscles tensed as he put in extra effort.

Iris turned and ran to the accelerator, the others not far behind.

Cisco was putting everything he had into broadcasting the signal. Images of the other metal pieces in their various locations still vied for his attention but after the wake-up call, he pushed them away as he searched for Barry. When he found him, Barry was still blurry, whatever voice speaking to him was still distorted. But that didn't matter because Cisco focused on sending the signal straight to him now. He got the feeling that Barry was running, could feel the small piece that Barry was holding in his hand, and he knew that Barry had reached the same conclusions they had. Barry was trying to phase.

Cisco poured all of his energy and concentration into the signal, and as he did things started to become clearer on Barry's side. He could see Barry, running round and round in what looked like a particle accelerator ring. He could see him starting to become less distinct and yet more distinct. He was glimpsing both worlds, it was really trippy. He could see that there was no hole in the accelerator roof like they ha— Caitlin's exclamation and Martin's voice cut across his concentration, and he had to focus extra hard not to lose the connection. He heard footsteps vacating the cortex, but he didn't have time to think about it because Martin was encouraging him to keep going. He doubled his efforts.

And suddenly the connection was crystal clear, the picture in his head bursting to life in full color and sound. He could see Barry, running laps in the S.T.A.R. Labs accelerator, phasing slowly to another world. The picture rapidly began to bleed to the edges like watercolors, filling in the rest of the scene.

Standing above Barry on the upper level was a man who looked very familiar. The scene abruptly filled in, overwhelming Cisco with the speed and content.

Eobard Thawne was standing above Barry, exultant as he watched Barry run. His eyes were alight in a very familiar, now very terrible way.

"It's working! It's working!" He laughed. The sound was jarring to Cisco, sending shock to every nerve, every cell, the feel of his heart shredding apart replaying in his mind.

"Ohmygodohmygod! What is he doing there? What is he doing? Barry look out!" Cisco was barely aware he was yelling out loud, too aware of his heart beating, shredding… His focus shattered, pulled apart by intense emotions that felt as real as Eobard's vibrating hand.

Bear was keeping track of the differences of the two worlds, watching one fade and the other become solid. He was between worlds now. He was so close, almost home. His last lap did not have Harrison standing above him, but it did have someone else.

His automatic glance up as he passed was habit now, just checking the progress of the phase since it was one of only a few indicators. Harrison was flickering in and out, much like his body must be. Everything seemed slower like it always did when he ran so fast, but when he looked up this time it slowed even more. Seconds stretched into eternities, one after another after another…

Iris was standing above him, beautiful as ever, looking down at his blur with eyes wide. They were filled with hope, longing and that same look she'd given him when he'd walked into the coffee shop after his coma.

Without meaning to he slowed slightly, wanting to hang on to the moment. Their eyes met for the briefest of milliseconds. Then he had sped past her position and he raced around again, wanting to see her, to complete the phase.

But he never made it. Halfway around the loop the piece in his hand altered its feed of the world frequency, rendering down to essentially static. Random vibrations and shocks filled his body as it tried to match what was now coming through. Instead it became jumbled and confused. Bear felt his body overload, short-circuiting as every nerve went haywire. One moment he was running, partially phased into his world, and the next he was down, skidding and rolling along the accelerator floor.

Except he wasn't just skidding and rolling. He was also phasing, in and out, an elbow passing through the floor where it should have hit and been badly damaged, his head passing through the side wall as he flipped askew. His other elbow and a knee didn't fare so well. He traveled a good fifty feet before he came to rest, but even then he could feel that something was very wrong.

Iris couldn't stop the swell of emotion inside her when Barry briefly met her eyes. Then he was gone again as Joe, Caitlin and Ronnie came up behind her to wait as well.

Their jubilant anticipation was soured as they waited, and waited. A blurred red form, barely visible, careened through their sightline. They all could clearly see the floor beneath him he was so transparent. Before he had even come to a complete stop, he was gone. He blinked out of their world, leaving them stunned.

All he left behind was horrified silence.

Cisco felt the connection break as Barry went down. "Barry! No!" He bolted upright in the chair, staring at Martin in horror.

"What happened?" The foreboding on the other man's face only confirmed Cisco's fear.

"I lost him! I messed it up…" He pulled off his glasses, trying to figure out what exactly had just happened. It didn't take long for his rational mind to play it out for him, for him to realize that if there was another Barry and another Oliver in that world, it was highly likely that there was a Harrison Wells alive and well, never body snatched by Eobard, not an evil speedster. Cisco had seen him and panicked, and Barry had been lost in the transfer.

"I'm sorry…I'm so sorry…let's try again. We can do it again…"

Martin's face didn't change. "Okay. Try it again." He nodded at the piece Cisco was still holding.

Cisco put the glasses back in place, but when he closed his eyes and tapped into the piece, he could only see the metal pieces now. No Barry at all. Cisco shifted through the different views over and over, hoping Barry would eventually show up. But he never did.

Even after he'd finally given up, Cisco stayed in the chair and left the glasses on. It was easier to avoid Martin's eyes that way.

But there was no way to hide the tears starting to run from behind the glasses, so Cisco got up and left. He ran down the hallway, headed for his car. He didn't feel like he could face anyone.

"I told them. I'm not that guy."

Barry, Iris and Tess had been watching Bear begin to phase on the monitor and were beside themselves with excitement. For a few precious minutes. Once they saw Bear go down on the monitor they all rushed to the accelerator. Barry sped past them all and was the first to arrive, of course. He stopped a few steps away and approached cautiously.

Bear lay on the floor, twitching and writing. He looked like he was shorting in and out, very similar to the time on the couch, but this time Bear was awake, and Barry could see random golden lightning sparks occurring all over his body. Barry didn't say what he was thinking, but it didn't look good. He kneeled down next to Bear, carefully assessing him.

"Bear?"

Bear's eyes blinked behind his mask. It was hard to focus, hard to think at first. His body was in chaos. "—I miss it—" Even his voice was shorting in and out. It sounded like he was a bad cell phone connection. What did emerge was distorted and strange, like when he disguised it.

Barry couldn't hide the distress in his expression. "I think so. What happened?"

"—n't know." Bear grimaced, trying to breathe. "I—almost there."

"Yeah, you were." Barry scanned Bear's body up and down, noting how various parts of it were going translucent and then solid, but not at the same time or even the same transparency. Bear was wavering back and forth, but there were multiple frequencies at work here. "Just lie still, Bear."

Bear tried, he really did. But his body refused to. It was twitching and jerking, overactive in every way. He groaned.

Harrison had waited for Tess and the others to arrive, and now they all were approaching. Barry held out a hand. "Don't touch him, he's not stable."

Iris came closer but didn't touch Bear. "How do we help him?" Her question was directed at her husband.

Barry was staring at Bear, thinking hard. "He might just need a little time to work through it himself. His body needs to find the right frequency again." He glanced back at the others. "I'm a little worried I can't help this time."

"—t happ—d?" Bear was still twitching, but his mind was starting to focus better, even if his speech was skipping. His voice still sounded like a stranger's to his own ears.

Harrison shook his head. "I don't know. Everything was fine. You were doing it, it was working. Then all of a sudden it was like the connection broke and you got stuck."

Bear's head was reeling, replaying memories with Eobard and entwining them with Harrison. "—said—working, you—Cisco—". Bear couldn't even verbalize what he was thinking, but in his head it was becoming clear. Cisco had tapped in enough to see Harrison and thought he was Eobard, and Cisco had panicked. Had he been able, Bear would have wept. Eobard had ruined things again. Even when erased from existence he couldn't be wiped from memory. The shorts of electricity on Bear's body, the twitching and involuntary phasing, and the frustration of losing what he was so close to achieving all became anger that boiled over as he became aware that there was a conversation in progress over him. He glared at Harrison as the latter finished his sentence.

"—but the problem is that if his secondary frequency is gone, which it may well be after this, there is no other viable way to get him home short of creating another singularity."

Barry and Tess were both opening their mouths to respond, but Bear beat them to it.

"Fine. Do it." Bear's voice warbled the words.

It was the first full sentence he'd managed to speak, and it took a few moments for the group to realize he had been the one to actually speak them.

Tess shook her head slightly, rejecting it. "You don't mean that. Think of the catastrophe, the danger to the city."

"—be I don't care anymore." Bear was shifting, struggling to his feet. "Maybe I'm tired of losing everything I ever cared about." His voice blipped in and cleared, but still sounded distorted. He was glaring at them, daring them to argue with him. "Maybe I just want something for myself once in a while." He'd managed to stand upright, still sparking, still twitching, still phasing on and off. "Maybe I just want to be happy. Maybe I'm tired of spending every day suffering because of what you stole from me!"

He was pointing straight at Harrison, filled with loathing, when he finally looked, really looked at him for the first time. The man was completely horrified, bewildered. And afraid. Tess was clutching her husband's arm as if she could somehow keep him safe, and staring at Bear as if he were a dangerous, unpredictable animal.

But the worst was looking at Barry, whose face looked like a reflection of himself. Disturbed, worried, disappointed.

And Iris, standing with both hands over her mouth, silently weeping for him. For his loss. For his actions. For his pain. Much like his Iris was probably doing right now.

Bear pressed his hands to his eyes, weaving where he stood. Eobard's voice whispered out of the corners of his mind again, confirming his worst fears. "I've controlled your life for so long, Barry. How will you get along without me?"

Eobard had taken everything from him, except the one thing Bear needed to get rid of so badly.

"You're no longer you now…" Eobard's words, talking about the speed force, now meant something else.

"And now, somehow, I know what Joe and Henry feel, when they look on you with pride. With love."

It was his greatest fear realized. The monster in his voice, the raging chaos in his body, it was all too much. He could feel blackness closing in, and right now he welcomed it.

Bear pitched straight forward, and Barry raced forward to catch him before he face-planted on the floor.

Central City

Iris sat in her father's living room, not speaking. She dug the metal piece deep into her hand, until Joe gently removed it and wrapped his arms around her. She wept into his shoulder while tears streamed down his face.

Martin sat on his couch at home, having just recounted their near victory to Clarissa. She hugged him tightly, and then they sat in silence. His hand never left hers.

Ronnie held Caitlin close on their bed as they both stared up at the ceiling, keeping each other warm. They needed each other more than ever now.

Henry sat in his cell, contemplating the ruined building he could just see from his window. He was patiently waiting.

Captain Cold went over the plans for his next robbery one more time, calculating seconds, planning moves. It was too easy.

Cisco stood in his apartment alone. He was breathing hard, leaning against the kitchen table. He put his hands to his face, backing away and turning away from the table. He slammed his fists on the counter, and with one sweep cleared it of the dishes scattered across it. Then he sank to the floor and buried his head in his arms, braced on his knees. His voice was muffled, but the words were for himself anyway.

"Screw you, Eobard. Screw you."

His empty apartment stood witness as he wept in defeat.

NOBODY PANIC!
Just remember, it's always darkest right before the dawn.

I always planned for this attempt to fail, even though it was a brilliant plan and they were so close... I swear I have a master plan.
If it makes you feel better, take note of how Iris and Joe pull together in the wake of this loss instead of pulling apart like the first time.

Also, Ronnie/Caitlin and Martin/Clarissa cling to each other. And Cisco...oh look I have to go.
The next chapter is not written yet but I'll do my best to get it out as fast as I can. Hang in there. :)