MANDATORY AUTHOR'S NOTE: Quick update again! And the chapters are shorter, lol. But not for long! Also, there's some citrusy fluff in this one, but no lime/lemon. MUST BUILD TENSION

DISCLAIMER: This disclaimer applies to the entire story. Kingdom Hearts and any and all things having to do with it do not belong to me. However, the plot and plot events are entirely MINE, along with the band Destiny's Embrace, the use of the word Hikari as a name, and the characters' personalities.

NOTES: This story is rated M.

ENJOY!

~x~

Chapter Twelve

~x~

Kairi closed her eyes and turned her face away, though it killed her to do so. She could feel Sora's eyes burning into her flesh; felt his body pressing up against her in an intimate fashion. She wanted him more than anything—so why was she pushing him away? Perhaps it was because she simply couldn't trust him. He had hated her up until this point and she could hardly believe that he could suddenly care for her overnight. Was it really just the self-harm? Or was it something else?

Sora surprised her by placing a gentle kiss to the side of her bared throat, sending a delicious chill down her spine. Kairi gritted her teeth against the feeling and tried to push him away.

"No," he growled, pulling her in closer.

"Stop," Kairi pleaded.

"I won't." He kissed a scorching hot trail up her neck and to her earlobe, causing her to cry out. Her knees knocked together, and if it weren't for Sora's hard body pressing her into the wall, she would have collapsed. Her hands tightened their grip on Sora's jacket, unwittingly keeping him near.

Sora's tongue followed wherever his lips journeyed, and it was all Kairi could do not to rip his clothes off right there in the entryway. She panted heavily as her blood began to heat, on its way to boiling. How could Sora know just what to do to render her so useless? When they had been friends, there had only been that one experimental moment when they were Freshmen, and that had been an excursion led by their hormones. Now that they were older and both had experience (though Kairi had more experience than he ever would, morbid as it was to say), Kairi feared that even if the roof came crashing down on top of them, Sora would get his way.

Suddenly and unexpectedly, Sora let go of her and stepped away. He stood there, eyes on fire and hands shaking, fighting the violent storm that raged inside of him.

Kairi placed a hand to her forehead, as if she had a headache. Her mind was addled—she couldn't think straight. She didn't know why he had stopped, but she knew that she needed to tread carefully.

"Sora," she said slowly. "What . . . Is happening between us?"

"I don't know."

"You have a girlfriend."

"I know."

"And there's too much between us."

"I know."

"Sora . . ."

"Shut up."

And then he was kissing her. He was kissing her with such force and zeal that one would have to be blind, deaf, and dumb to not understand the meaning behind his lips. His fingers tangled themselves in her long, cherry-red hair, pulling hard enough to sting. Kairi did her best to keep up, kissing him back with as much pressure and passion as she could manage. Sora started walking backward, into the kitchen, pulling Kairi along with him as she clawed at his shirt. She moaned, he panted, and then she was sitting on the counter with her legs wrapped around his middle.

You know the feeling of being caught up? Like when you're hanging out with a friend, and then that friend calls for more friends to come over. They bring friends with them, and then all-of-a-sudden, the group plans to go skinny dipping in the neighbor's pool. You never agreed to it, but you're so overpowered by how many people there are that want to break trespassing laws that you're scared to say no. So you do it, and it's awesome, but it leaves you with this tiny little icky feeling in your heart that say, "Hey, you know . . . Maybe I shouldn't have done that." But you can't have any regrets because that's what life is all about, right? "Spontaneity?"

Sora slipped his hands up underneath Kairi's shirt and grabbed her breasts, palming them as if they might break. Kairi exhaled sharply and arched her back into his touch, her stomach twisting and turning at the thought of what was happening. What might be going to happen.

"Nnh, Sora," she moaned loudly when he nipped her collarbones.

"You like that?" he chuckled devilishly, passing the pads of his thumbs over her nipples repeatedly. Her body responded in kind, her hips jerking uncontrollably. Kairi gripped the edge of the counter on either side of her thighs as if it were anchoring her to the Earth and keeping her from floating off into space. This reminded her of the time Vanitas had kissed her in this very spot, on the counter, but this . . . This was much, much better.

Kairi nodded rapidly in response to Sora's question, keeping her eyes closed. She was afraid that if she opened them and looked at him, then she would find out that this was all a crazy, stupid dream. Whether her and Sora had things to talk about to mend their friendship or relationship, or whatever it was, she still wanted this. It was like a small bite of the most delicious cake in the entire world, and she wanted to savor it.

Taking his face between her hands, she kissed him slowly and deliberately, pushing her tongue past his lisp in order to taste his emotions. He inhaled through his nose and tilted his head slightly, deepening the kiss and heightening Kairi's senses. His hands gripped her hips and pulled her down off the counter. They continued to kiss, their arms wrapping around one another, and suddenly Kairi didn't feel like this was simply being "caught up" any longer.

They kissed for a long moment before Sora pulled away and rested his forehead against hers. They took some time to catch their breath, and then they looked into each other's eyes. Kairi's bottom lip began to tremble and her eyes filled with tears.

"What are we gonna do?" Kairi whimpered.

"I don't know."

Kairi sighed and pushed him away. She walked a few yards to the right and then crossed her arms over her chest.

"Sora, I can't do this if you're not willing."

"Willing?" Sora's voice was edgy. "What the fuck does that mean?"

"You have to be willing, Sora!" Kairi yelled, throwing her arms out to the side. "You have to be willing to do whatever it takes to fix us! And that means we have to trust each other."

"I . . ." He rubbed the back of his neck and averted her gaze.

Kairi shook her head and walked over to her front door. She turned the knob and pulled it open. With a flourishing gesture, she pointed the way out.

"Leave," was all she said.

Sora stared at her. "Are you being serious right now?"

"Yeah," she replied. "If you're not going to be able to trust me, then leave."

"Oh, and like you can trust me?" Sora scoffed. "You're acting like this is all on me!"

Kairi shot him a look of incredulity. "Of course I trust you! You've never given me reason not to trust you. You may be an asshole, but I trust you with my life, Sora."

He was obviously stunned. "But . . . But how?"

Kairi rolled her eyes. "Sora, how you treat me doesn't affect whether or not I can trust you. It's what a person does that makes them untrustworthy."

The brunette looked down, and it was so much like the old Sora that Kairi nearly burst out crying. Whenever he got in trouble when they were kids, he would hang his head like a lost puppy, apologize, and then trudge off as if he were the saddest boy alive. The fact that he was hanging his head right now proved to Kairi that she still trusted him—he felt bad for his actions, and that made him human.

Sora walked slowly to the front door, and then paused. He glanced at her over his shoulder.

"This never happened, okay? I don't want Xion finding out."

Dismayed, Kairi nodded numbly. For some reason, she had thought—she had hoped—that Sora might actually want to work things out. But apparently she wasn't even worth it to him.

"And Kairi?"

"Hm?" Kairi mumbled, eyes downcast.

Sora sighed and turned completely around to face her. Gently, he took her hand and held it to his chest. Kairi stared at him, regarding him with shock.

"Promise me you won't hurt yourself again, okay? Just promise me, and I . . . I promise you that I'll . . . Try to trust you."

Kairi wanted to say so many things. She wanted to call him out and argue that he was being hypocritical; that he had no right to be demanding anything of her when he couldn't even make a solid promise in return. She frowned, but kept her mouth shut. "Baby steps," was what Namine would say.

"Are you going to stop being so mean to me?" Kairi challenged.

Sora's lips quirked upward in a lazy half-smile. "Maybe."

Kairi slapped him on the upper arm and blushed. Were things going back to normal . . . ?

"All right," Sora laughed. "Well . . . I suppose we should get together to work on the project soon, but my band is practicing a lot because we have that show on Halloween."

Kairi nodded slowly. "That's fine. The next part isn't due until next week . . . I could just finish it for you?"

He grinned. "Really? Sweet! Thanks!"

He leaned forward and gave her a quick, surprising peck on the cheek.

"Later, Kai." And then he was gone.

Kairi held a hand to her cheek, eyes wide as she stared into the empty air he had just vacated. She couldn't believe it. Things had literally done a complete 180, and now not only was Sora acting friendly toward her, but he had actually made her a promise. He had always kept his promises in the past . . . Would he keep this one?

Kairi would soon find out.

~x~

It soon became clear the following day, Thursday, that Kairi had been played for a fool. Not only did Sora completely ignore her existence at school when she tried to wave at him, but he actually laughed when Xion and her friends made jibes at her in the hallway. At first, Kairi had chalked it up to him not wanting Xion to find out about what they had done (which was pretty fucked up, when you looked at it), but when she'd tried to talk to him in Home Ec and he'd just gotten pissed off . . . Well, she realized the truth.

After Home Ec, Kairi cornered him in the hall.

"What the fuck, Sora?" she hissed. "I understand if you want to keep us a secret, but—"

Sora glared daggers at her, looked around furtively, and then grabbed her roughly by the arms.

"There is no us," he growled dangerously. "None."

"Then what the fuck happened yesterday?!"

Sora rolled his eyes. "You did my part of the homework, didn't you?"

"Well, yes, but . . ." She trailed off and then her eyes went wide. "You . . . You did all that just to get me to do your homework?"

He merely stared at her.

Kairi blinked back tears and stepped away from him. Was this really happening? Had Sora really changed that much . . . ?

"You don't want to fix things, do you?" she whispered as a tear fell.

"Why, so you can lie to me over and over again?" He snorted. "No, thanks."

"So everything . . . All of it . . . ?" She absentmindedly fidgeted with the hem of the sleeve that hid her cuts. Did he feign caring about her self-harm, too?

He didn't say anything.

"Sora, why?!"

He brushed his bangs out of his eyes and looked away as if bored. "I'll admit—I wanted to fuck, but since you put the stopper on that one, I settled for the homework."

Kairi felt all of the breath come rushing out of her lungs and before he saw her break down, she turned and walked away.

She couldn't believe the words that she had just heard. Sora used her. He played with her volatile emotions and he used her. Of all people to do such a thing . . . She never would have thought . . . Did their entire friendship mean nothing to him? She should have known things didn't seem right. He had changed so quickly, without any warning or cause. She should have known that it was all a façade.

Kairi didn't know how much longer that she could handle this. Things with Sora, with her mother, with school . . . It was all too much. She felt as though she had nothing left and nothing to hold onto.

Perhaps Kairi hadn't reached her breaking point. Perhaps the final act had just begun and the curtain was due to close.

Perhaps she just needed one more push to reach her limit.

~x~

The weekend passed by as most weekends had: a depressing, dark blur. Kairi spent her days neglecting her schoolwork and lying in bed with Memory. Whenever Kairi was sad, Memory was sad, and though the dog was a sorrowful reminder of Sora, it was a comfort to have her there.

Kairi stared up at the ceiling, silence ringing in her eardrums, and sighed. There was no other way to explain it: something had to give, and soon. She was tired of playing this game with Sora. The push and pull was starting to pull her under the waves. Any more, and she would drown. She needed something to wake her up; something to jolt her out of her stupor. Before she came back to school, Kairi was tough. She was tough, and she was smart. She didn't purposely put herself in stupid situations that would end in her getting hurt. What would it take to bring her back to that state of mind?

At the sound of her cell phone's ringtone, Kairi took her time answering it.

"What are you doing?"

"Hey, Namine," Kairi sighed. This was the umpteenth time that Namine had called Kairi that weekend. The poor blonde was worried sick since Kairi had pretty much been AWOL since her talk with Sora, and she kept calling her, trying to make sure she was okay and didn't need her to come over. "I'm just . . . Sittin' here, I guess."

"Well, now you have plans!" Namine said brightly.

"What? No, I don't?" Kairi replied, confused. Memory yipped and climbed up onto Kairi's chest, curling up into a ball there.

"Yes, you do," the blonde said. "Wanna know what they are?"

"Namine," Kairi whined. "I don't wanna go anywhere."

"Too bad! You're going!" Kairi heard someone's voice in the background. It took her a moment before she realized that it was Roxas!

"Wha—?" Kairi lifted Memory off of her and sat up.

Namine giggled. "Get ready to go, 'cuz we're on our way."

"But where are we going?" Kairi asked, hurrying to her closet to start searching for clothes to wear. Where could they possibly be going that involved Sora's cousin, Roxas?

"Guess."

"Huh?" Kairi frowned, lifting up a couple of dresses and holding them against herself. "No, just tell me!"

"No!" Namine pouted. "You have to guess!"

Kairi scowled. "Are we going to a movie, or something?" She tossed aside the dresses and continued to sift through her closet. She hoped Sora wasn't going to be involved in this little hang out session. Kairi didn't know how she would react to seeing Sora after what he had told her. She still couldn't wrap her head around the lengths that he had gone to to get what he wanted out of her. She didn't want to believe it, but . . . God, if she saw him now, she didn't know if she would kiss him or kill him.

"We're going to The Secret Spot," Namine said excitedly. "Destiny's Embrace is having a show!"

~x~

A/N: MUAHAHAHAHAHA Sora's back to being an ass napkin. And seriously DON'T WORRY there IS a REASON for it. A good one. A shocking one.

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