Marie burst through the door at the top of the tower, skidded through a sharp turn, caught herself on the parapet, then ran along beside it until she stumbled to a halt at their usual lookout spot. "Ha, I won!" she crowed triumphantly, between gasps for breath. "Didn't think I could, did you? But I beat you, Anna! Fair and square!"
Only then did she turn around and realize that the red-headed princess was not standing right behind her. In fact, she didn't see Anna at all.
"Anna?" she called out. "Anna, where are you?"
"I'm over here, Marie," came an answering voice from somewhere around the curve of the tower's central spire. Marie retraced her steps, past the door and around to the other side of the guard walk. Sure enough, there was Anna, perched on top of the wall like usual. But this time, her eyes roved over the grounds enclosed within the castle walls. They swept back and forth across the palace, then rose up to scan the houses and shops of the town that clung to the foothills beyond. A wistful smile curved her lips.
"Anna?" Marie queried as she came to stand beside her at the wall. "You okay?"
Anna closed her eyes for a moment, drawing in a deep lungful of the sweet spring air. The last chill of winter had only recently receded, but the scent of growing things was already heavy on the breeze. It seemed to bring with it the promise of new beginnings. And second chances.
"Marie", she began, "have you ever spent so much time dreaming about what you want that you forget all about what you already have?" The other girl just stared up at her, clearly not having any idea what she was talking about.
Anna turned halfway around, so that she straddled the parapet, and looked down from her perch. "I think I need to apologize, Marie. I'm afraid I haven't been a very good friend to you."
Marie looked startled. "What are you talking about? Of course you've been a good friend! I mean..."
But Anna just shook her head, a smile still on her face at Marie's immediate attempt to jump to her defense. "No, I really haven't. And it's no use arguing with me. I've been thinking about this a lot lately. And I know I'm right.
"We first met what, about six months ago now? Seven? And since then, we've had all kinds of fun. Played every game we could think of. Joked, laughed. And we've talked about all sorts of things. But when I think back now, I realize that we never talked about the really important stuff. I certainly didn't. In fact, I went out of my way to hide the most important stuff from you."
Anna turned her head and gazed back at the palace. When she spoke again, her voice had become just the slightest bit distant. "Friends shouldn't keep secrets from each other. Not about the things that really matter."
Marie wasn't entirely sure where this was going. But she was starting to feel more than a little uncomfortable before Anna finally continued. "Elsa left her room."
"What?! When? Today?"
Anna started to shake her head, then shrugged again. "I don't know, maybe. But no, that's not what I meant. I mean she has left her room, several times now apparently, over the last few months."
"She...? But...? When did you find this out?"
Anna looked back at Marie again, and there was the slightest suggestion of pink tinting her cheeks behind her freckles. "The fifth of March."
"Oh." And then, as the significance of the date registered in Marie's mind, "Ohhhhhhh..."
Anna nodded. "I was sitting in front of her room, going on and on about everything that had happened that morning. And then suddenly, there she was. Standing right there in the hallway."
Marie could almost feel answers suddenly clicking into place inside her head. But she had to ask anyway. "What did you do?"
"I lost it. Everything I'd been bottling up since she first hid behind her door. All the anger and pain. I just... It was too much. And I laid it all on her. I said some truly awful things. And I can't lie to myself and say that I didn't mean them, because I really did.
"Then, at the end of it all, I just turned and walked away. Turned my back on Elsa. Shut her out the way she had shut me out for so long. And at that moment, it felt good. It felt right. It felt like what she deserved.
"But by the time I got back to my room, I had already realized what I'd just done. That I did to my sister the exact same thing that's been tearing me up inside all this time. And I hated myself for it. I couldn't stand to even look at myself in the mirror the rest of that day.
"So I tried to make it right. That night, after everyone else had gone to bed, I slipped out and snuck over to Elsa's room. I had no idea what she must have thought of me at that point. I figured she had to be furious with me for the way I'd treated her. So I left her a gift, one that I hoped might let her know how sorry I felt. You might have noticed that one of my dolls has been missing."
Anna's eyes seemed to focus on something that only she could see. "Then I waited. I figured, after all, that Elsa had already left her room three times. Surely, if she'd forgiven me, she could come out again and let me know. And if she didn't... Well, I figured that meant that she was still mad at me and didn't want anything to do with me. So I kept waiting. And waiting." The young princess shrugged. "And she didn't come."
"Oh, Anna," Marie sighed sympathetically. But Anna just shook her head.
"I was being an idiot. Acting like I was the only one whose feelings mattered. Never stopped to think what Elsa might have been feeling. That she might have been every bit as lost and lonely as I was. And who knows how long things might have stayed that way, both of us too scared to reach out to one another. Each convinced that the other wanted nothing to do with us.
"I'm just so lucky that you're a far better friend than I have been. I never thanked you for what you did, you know. I'm not sure how I could ever thank you enough."
Marie's cheeks turned positively scarlet with embarrassment. "Anna, I wish you'd stop saying that. You shouldn't put yourself down. You're a great friend!"
"You think so?" Anna asked with a voice that clearly indicated she still disagreed. "I wanted to do something to thank you, Marie. Something really special. Because what you did for me and Elsa meant more to me than you'll ever know. So I wracked my brain for hours and days trying to figure out what I could do for you that could come anywhere close to that. And that was when I realized... just how little I really know about you."
Marie laughed. "Are you kidding? All the questions you always grilled me with? All the time I spent telling you ab-"
"About the places you lived," Anna interrupted. "About the sights and the sounds of all the cities you've been to. Yeah, I know all about them. But they aren't you, Marie! When did I ever ask about you?"
The brunette opened her mouth to respond, and then stopped. She thought back on all their conversations, all their idle chatter. And she had the sudden sinking feeling that she wasn't going to be able to argue with Anna on this point.
"I'm so sorry, Marie," Anna replied to the look of dismay that had appeared so clearly on her friend's face. "It's all my fault! I think... I think that I was scared to let myself get close to someone again. Afraid to get hurt again. And it also sort of felt like I would be abandoning Elsa if I let myself make a new friend while she was still hurting so much.
"I see now how unfair that's been. To everyone, really. But especially to you. And I wish I could go back and do it all over again, only get it right this time. But since I can't, I'll just have to do the next best thing. From this point forward, I want to start being as good a friend to you as you have been to me!"
And so saying, Anna hopped down to the flagstones beside Marie and wrapped her arms around her friend, hugging her tight. "That's going to be no small feat, mind you," she whispered into Marie's ear. "But you're absolutely worth it."
• • •
"Now, where should we start?" Anna asked a minute later, when she finally released her embrace. Her face was aglow with excitement, and her body was so full of nervous energy, it seemed completely incapable of standing still.
Marie, still a little thunderstruck by it all, just shook her head. "I... I have no idea! I can't think of a thing."
Anna laughed. "That's alright. Hey, I know! Why don't we take a walk around the grounds? Walking always helps me think." Marie nodded distractedly, figuring that at least a walk might keep Anna from bouncing up and down on the spot like she was now – a singularly distracting movement that certainly wasn't doing anything to help Marie's concentration.
So the two girls made their way back down the tower steps that they'd so recently climbed, Anna still seeming to bounce a little with every step. Marie, meanwhile, found herself falling a bit behind, as her mind continued to try to catch up with what had just happened. She still hadn't quite sorted it all out when she reached the bottom of the stairs... and nearly ran into Anna. The other girl was leaning against the side of the doorway, arms crossed and with a friendly smirk on her face. Having been far too excited to rein herself in, she had reached the bottom well ahead of Marie. Then she had just turned and watched her friend's slower progress down the last curve of the spiral stair.
"Sorry," Marie began.
"Uh uh," Anna cut her off. "No apologies. We've already settled the fact that I'm the one who needs to be asking forgiveness today, not you. So no more of that, understand?" Marie nodded, her lips quirking at Anna's gentle scolding. Anna stepped to one side and graciously gestured for her friend to lead the way into the courtyard.
"So," the princess continued as they stepped back out into the bright spring sunlight, "tell me all about Marie!"
"Oh, Anna," Marie replied in exasperation. "I don't have the faintest idea where to begin. I've never liked talking about myself..."
"Well, there you go!" Anna exclaimed enthusiastically. "See, I've learned something new about you already!" Marie intentionally misstepped so as to bump Anna off balance with her shoulder. They both grinned at each other.
"Alright then, let's try a different approach," Anna decided. "What's your favorite color?"
"Oh. Um, yellow, I guess."
"Favorite dessert?"
"Hmm... Raspberry souffle."
"Ooh, never had that before. But it sounds delicious! Ever had any pets?"
"Not that I recall, no."
"Shoe size?"
Marie stopped in her tracks and gave Anna a look that clearly said, What kind of a question is that? Anna brushed it off with a wave of her hand. "You're right. Doesn't matter. Let's see. I do know that you like to read, so... favorite book?"
"Oooh, that's a tough one. There are so many." They continued to stroll around the grounds as Marie mulled over her answer to that question and the parade of others that followed. Anna was definitely learning a lot about her friend that she'd never known before. And yet, all these bits of trivia still didn't feel like they were adding up to a real sense of Marie herself. She had the nagging feeling that, if she could only hit on the right question, she could finally unravel the mystery. But she was quickly running out of ideas.
They stopped to let a duck waddle across the path a few feet ahead of them. Four fluffy new hatchlings were strung out behind her, hurrying to keep up with their mother. They were such adorable little fuzzballs!
And then suddenly, a snatch of barely remembered conversation popped into Anna's head and right out of her mouth. "If you could be anything you wanted to be when you grow up, what would you be?"
For the second time that morning, one of Anna's questions brought Marie up short. However, the expression on her face was quite different this time. She looked... embarrassed?
Anna turned to face her friend head on. "Marie?"
The other girl began to play nervously with the ends of the ribbon tied around her waist. She bit her bottom lip self consciously before finally saying, "Promise you won't laugh?"
Anna drew a finger twice across her heart. "Promise."
Marie considered Anna for a long moment before finally drawing a deep breath, closing her eyes, and then saying all in a rush, "The only thing I've ever really, really wanted to be is a musician."
When she heard no reply, Marie cautiously opened one eye and peeked out. There she saw Anna standing, eyes round and bright, cheeks dimpled, with both hands covering her mouth. "You are laughing!" she accused in an offended tone.
"No!" Anna shook her head and dropped her hands to reveal what might have been the broadest smile Marie had ever seen on her face. "Oh, Marie! That's so perfect! I don't know why, but it is. It's you, it's so perfectly you!" Marie felt a sheepish grin spreading across her own face. "Oh, tell me more!"
"Well," Marie began, quickly warming up to the subject in the face of such an eager audience, "I've always enjoyed music, for as long as I can remember. My mother is a wonderful singer, though she's rather shy about it. I don't think I've ever seen her sing in public. But whenever we were at home, she would just slip into song while making dinner. Or when I was young and she was giving me a bath. Oh, and her lullabies! I can still hear them in my head as I drift off to sleep some nights. So our home was always full of music.
"But it was in Cartagena that I really fell in love. You see, there was this plaza in the neighborhood where we lived. And about once a week, a group of local musicians would gather there to perform. All kinds of different instruments, mind you. They were sort of an informal orchestra. There were quite a few professionals – some were with the symphony, others with smaller bands. But most of them were just people who loved to play.
"Usually, they would pick popular tunes that everybody knew, and that was wonderful. But every month or two, they'd put on a real 'production'. They'd actually select some more complicated music and get together for a week or so beforehand to rehearse. And when the time came around for one of those concerts, the entire neighborhood would show up. The plaza would be so crowded, you couldn't move. But nobody seemed to mind once the music started."
Anna watched as Marie closed her eyes and began to sway gently to music only she could hear. "I never missed a single one of those performances. Oh, Anna. It was so beautiful. Every time, I'd feel my heart breaking one minute, only to then have it soaring among the clouds the next. It was... it was... Oh, I can't describe it. You had to be there, to hear it yourself. And I thought if I could do that, if I could someday make people feel the way I was feeling? Well then, how could I ask anything more of life."
Marie fell silent, her eyes still lightly closed as the music played out in her head. Anna just watched her, mesmerized. And when her friend finally let the song slip away and opened her eyes again, the only thing Anna could think to say was, "Wow..."
How did I never know any of this? she wondered. She felt more ashamed than ever about how little she'd learned about Marie during all these months. But today was all about correcting those mistakes, not dwelling on them.
"So what instrument do you play?" Anna asked, her curiosity well and truly piqued.
Marie shrugged, suddenly looking a little embarrassed. "Um, none, actually. I mean, just because I love listening to music doesn't mean I'd actually be any good at playing it. And sure, I sometimes imagine myself up on stage performing with the orchestra. But it's just a silly dream." Anna noticed that Marie was once again toying with the ends of her ribbon. "I mean, I'm just a harbor master's daughter, after all. What do I know about music?" She gave a small laugh, an attempt to take some of the sting out of her own words. "In the end, I'm happy enough just to be in the audience."
Anna stared at her friend, searching her face. Marie wasn't returning her gaze, but was looking down at the strip of yellow fabric that she kept rolling and unrolling between her fingers.
"It's not silly," Anna declared somberly, placing a hand on Marie's shoulder. "I think it's a wonderful idea. Now if you'd said that you wanted to grow up to be a souffle chef, that would have been silly."
Her little jest had the desired effect, as Marie giggled endearingly and let go of the ribbon. Anna took advantage of the opportunity to slide her fingers down her friend's arm until she could clasp the newly freed hand. Their fingers intertwined. And then, smiles on both their faces, they continued their walk through the gardens, chatting amiably once again.
But Anna's mind was already racing far ahead.
• • •
Later that afternoon, she stood before the closed door, feeling unaccountably and uncharacteristically nervous. She still wasn't completely sure that this was a good idea. But she couldn't do this alone, and she couldn't see any other way to make it happen.
Steeling herself, she raised her hand and rapped her knuckles against the wood.
"It's me, Anna." She swallowed. "I hope I'm not bothering you. But I... um... I need to ask you for... a favor?"
There was a pause. Which lengthened into a silence. And then finally, the familiar voice replied.
"Alright. Come in."
