Back to writing… It's something to take my mind off my horrible grades. Of course, my 'horrible' is probably different from most people's... Huh.

I've got to snap outta it, I know. And stop brooding. And start writing... Haha.

Bella's PoV

I strode down the corridors to the Training Hall, feeling irritated at myself, and strangely pleased.

Being so close to Edward was...unnerving, to say the least. I rubbed my hands along my bare arms absentmindedly. A human habit that I had not yet gotten rid off.

I didn't want to be human. It was too complex. And now I found out that being a vampire was just as complicated.

I put that out of my mind as I neared the Training Hall. Aro had recently renovated it so that the walls were made of Platinum. Quite expensive, really, but the Volturi were nothing of not wealthy. Even more so than the Cullens.

Platinum. Toughest material to humans. But it would have to do.

We trained in this Hall. Aro pitted us against each other, than ranked us according to strength and fighting ability. Naturally, Luke and I were ranked at the top.

When I had first joined, it hadn't been long before I rose among the ranks of Volturi Guard members. I had to fight off jealousy and competition along the way. It wasn't easy, but it wasn't that hard either.

Pushing the doors open with more force than necessary, I entered the Hall. Luke was already waiting for me. I greeted him with a smile and a hug.

He grinned back at me, a smile that melted my heart. All my recent troubles vanished out my mind as he leaned down and kissed me.

Aro cleared his throat impatiently. Luke rolled his eyes, his back to Aro, so that only I could see. I giggled quietly as he unlocked my arms from his waist.

Aro started giving orders and calling the new members out to warm-up. I rolled my eyes. Warm-up.

Luke leaned down. "We really have to get a room for ourselves to train," he whispered. I knew what he meant. It was annoying being disturbed all the time.

"Train what?" Jane asked, appearing behind me. Her eyes glittered with mirth. "Your lips?"

The side of Luke's mouth twitched up. I whacked the back of her head, but I didn't say anything.

Alec appeared behind Jane. They were never far apart for long. I stopped wondering whether Alec heard anything when Jane started telling him. They never kept secrets from each other either.

Aro paired us up, Luke and I together, as usual. Jane and Alec. Heidi and Dimitri. Felix didn't turn up. He was too busy shoveling blood down his gullet as fast as he could, the last time I'd seen him.

Round one. I cracked my knuckles. Luke helped me out of my cloak, and then shrugged out of his.

The newbie facing us was cocky, too cocky for his own good. His eyes were crimson. Fresh one, then. I pitied him. He was going to fall, hard.

Aro clapped his hands. Silence washed over the watching crowd of vampires.

The newbie launched himself at us. There was the sound of two boulders meeting in an avalanche as he crashed into Luke.

I watched as they wrestled for a little while. I knew Luke was just playing with him.

It wasn't long before I saw Luke get tired of the game. He rolled out from under the newbie's judo hold.

"So, how's Edward's healing coming along?" He asked, as he hurled the unfortunate newbie into the other wall. I winced in pity inside, but didn't voice my concerns.

"Fine," I yelled across the room.

"I see."

Luke flicked a wrist. The newbie landed in a heap in at Luke's feet.

He flicked my wrist again, backwards. He slammed into the wall behind me.

I turned, as the newbie struggled to his feet. In my peripheral vision, I saw Luke step aside and bow.

"Your turn, love." He grinned.

I raised an arm. His head snapped up.

"Look into my eyes," I ordered.

He lifted his gaze, helpless. Images flashed before my eyes. Things of his life, human and vampire. Secrets and thoughts, things he was ashamed of.

Why do you want to join us? I asked.

The images flickered, and morphed.

Power, said a voice. It was as clear as though he had said it out loud.

Power? I pressed.

Many people joined the Volturi for power, of because they were afraid of us, or they had nothing else left to do in life.

He had more ambition than most, though. Aro would probably prize that above all. He always used to tell us how he knew he wasn't very powerful, but he had rose to power quickly, to vampire royalty, because he was ambitious.

I blinked, then exerted my power over him so that he crumpled into a writhing mess at my feet.

I turned away from him so that the Ancients, Luke, and I could discuss. I knew he would be in too much pain to do anything.

"Let him join," Aro said airily. "He would be a useful Guard."

Caius was against it, of course, but then again, he always did seem to try his best to find ways to undermine Aro's efforts.

This time, without fail, as always, he pointed out that if the boy was too ambitious, he might try to overthrow them and claim the seat of power.

Aro and Luke snorted at the same time, both in derision and disgust.

"Not with them around," Aro said, gesturing to Luke and me.

Caius glared at his brother with enough force to fell a grown man.

They both looked at Marcus to- once again- be tiebreaker.

"Let the insolent little fool join," he said wearily.

Marcus scowled, black as a thundercloud. He stalked out of the room, black cloak swishing around his ankles,

In contrast, Aro grinned and giggled and patted Luke on his back.

I rolled my eyes, and Luke smirked back, wrapping one arm around my waist.

I glanced up warily. Luke's face was hard.

Lowering my head inconspicuously, I stole a glance around from beneath my lashes.

Edward was just outside the glass doors, with his family behind him.

I sucked in a quick breath. What was he doing here?

Alice was supporting him with one arm, and they were arguing heatedly. Edward looked like he was insisting on something, but Aro had instructed the room to be sound-proofed, so I couldn't hear a peep.

Alice seemed to give up after a while, and she let go of Edward so abruptly that he stumbled for a moment. I felt my breath catch, until he caught his balance at the last minute.

Alice mouthed the words, "I told you so," and Edward glowered at her.

"Fine," he snapped wordlessly. It felt frustrating that I couldn't hear anything. I felt handicapped.

Edward pulled his lips back in a growl, and then turned towards the door. His eyes darted around the room, searching.

Searching for me, I realized. I liked that.

His roving gaze found mine, and, an instant too late, I looked away. Luke stiffened at my side when Edward walked through the door.

Aro seemed oblivious to everything that was happening in this room. He clapped his hands together for order, and then announced, "I'm holding a meeting."

He gave both of us significant looks, and said, "This is to concern the situation of our unexpected guests, the Cullens. Doubtless, they are welcome to stay as long as they like, but in return, I shall like to ask for a favor."

A soft growl erupted from Edward's family members.

Aro's eyes glittered, and Luke seemed to understand what he meant, and was not happy about it.

"What?" I asked. "What is it?"

Then suddenly the answer hit me in the face. "He's not going to ask them to-to... join, is he?" I gasped. Luke's jaw hardened. "Not if I have anything to say about it," he muttered, tugging my waist as he wove through the crowd.

Aro was dismissing everyone, but told the Cullens and Luke and I to remain. The air in the room felt like chocolate pudding. I couldn't breathe.

Aro walked up the dais and waved us over. The Cullens stood to one side, tight-knit, and warily shuffled forward. Luke grabbed my hand and yanked me up, a little too violently, I thought.

After the usual round of bloody drinks, which the Cullens politely declined, Aro got down to business.

"So. Cullens. I would like to offer you a place in the Volturi." There it is, I thought sourly. What he's wanted for so long.

"All of you, but most importantly Edward and Alice"- I scoffed at that- "are invited to join us, of course, and I would appreciate if you agreed."

"Oh no, thank you," said Alice, smiling in a strained manner. "I mean, I already have all I want. I'm very contented already."

"But-" Aro started to protest, but Alice held up a pale hand. I admired her guts to actually stop Aro in mid-sentence.

"The answer's 'no', and that's final. I already have a family Aro. I can't just abandon them." Her face filled with mock horror. Quite the actress, our Alice.

"Oh, but they could join the Guard too, sweet Alice." I realized Aro was pleading, and frowned. Aro never pleaded. He preferred to resort to underhand means and blackmail when times like these came up.

That Aro should plead... Something was very wrong indeed.

Aro smiled in an understanding way, but I could sense the rage boiling underneath his cool facade. He was anything but calm. How dare she reject his offer?

I don't understand, I thought at Luke, burying my face in his side. Why would he want them to join when he already has us?

In response, Luke shrugged.

Aro's smile looked off-kilter. False, somehow. Wrong.

Then I realized Edward hadn't said anything, and that very thought drove Aro out of my mind.

Edward's face was pale, his lips bloodless. His fingers clenched so hard on the table that his knuckles turned white, and the table started to splinter.

Alice must have realized the same thing, because she leaned towards her brother and nudged him. When he didn't respond, she mouthed his name through unmoving lips.

He looked like a statue, I thought. A cold, marble statue.

The tension in the room was making me nervous. Why was he taking so long to decide? His family wasn't going to join the Volturi!

What is he waiting for, I thought impatiently. Luke's fingers tightened around my wrist.

"I-I need s-sometime to-to think," he said at last. My jaw dropped. He needed time to think? About what?

His place was with his family, not with mine. Not with the Volturi.

"Of course, my dear boy," Aro said, looking relieved. "Take all the time you need to consider my offer." Then he smiled, more genuinely this time.

Alice was gaping at Edward, Rosalie looked murderous, Emmett looked shocked and a tad bit confused, and Jasper looked concerned. And if Carlisle and Esme were here, I suspected he would've looked calm and understanding, while she would've looked concerned. The model parents.

Luke seemed to be choking on something.

I couldn't breathe. Not that it was necessary, of course. And my mouth felt dry. My skin tingled with anticipation, and, perhaps- dare I admit it?- a bit of hope.

That's a lot more hope than there should be, warned a mental voice.

I know, I know, I grumbled back.

Aro dismissed us all, still smiling, but I dimly assumed he would throw one of his tantrums as soon as we were out of the way.

Edward looked frozen in shock.

Damn, I snarled under my breath. I still have Healing sessions with him. In just over half an hour.

I cursed under my breath, than ducked out of Luke's arms and brushed past the Cullens. When my skin came into contact with Edward's, there was that annoying spark again.

I walked into my bedroom, threw myself down on the covers, than uttered every single bad word I knew.

Then I got up, pulled my hair into a messy bun, and donned my dark grey cloak.

No use procrastinating.

Edward's PoV

The minute I found out I could move, insisted that I get out of bad. I need to find Bella, I had insisted. I have to discuss the Healing sessions with her.

But I'm sure my family saw through my lying. For all the good it did, I could've been made of glass.

They knew I just wanted to see Bella. Again.

I scowled. Alice had demanded she support me.

"Bella will warm to you more, seeing you helpless," she said. "It'll bring out her protective side."

Oh, so now she's Dr. Phil?

"That's stupid," I argued back.

It was obviously the wrong thing to say, as I would find out in about three seconds...two...one...

"Oh, yeah?" She turned to me, her eyes blazing, her nostrils flared with anger.

Right on time. Cue fearful screams in background.

"Oh, yeah?" She half-shrieked. "Look into my eyes now, Edward, and tell me you don't want that. Look into my eyes, and try and see if you can admit to that."

I couldn't, of course, and Alice knew it. She was just baiting me.

"Remember, Edward, that you're not the only one who wants Bella back," she hissed.

"Oh? Then I'm the only who cares more than you guys, I guess."

"You think I don't care?" She screamed furiously.

Jasper wrapped an arm around her, and to my surprise, Alice buried her face in his shoulder and burst into dry, heart-wrenching sobs.

"Hush, hush," Jasper murmured comfortingly, all the while shooting me reproachful glares from behind her back. He pushed s strand of wayward ink-black hair from her forehead.

At least he has his love with him, I thought bitterly.

We walked towards the Training Hall, not bothering to ask for directions. Alice was still fuming, but after about a minute of watching me stagger around and getting light-headed- the way I tended to feel around Bella- she had forcefully hauled me upright with one hand.

It didn't hurt, of course, but it was more than just a little awkward.

It wasn't hard to guess which room was the Training Hall.

As Emmett had pointed out, a little unnecessarily, I felt, "It's got to be the place with vampires being hurled everywhere."

Bella was darting around like a deadly arrow, and her partner- surprise, surprise, Luke- her chocolate-colored hair streaming out in a dark cloud. Pale arms flashed, and before I could blink, the unfortunate newborn was on the floor, curled up in a fetal position.

The match ended with Aro congratulating them, and Luke smiled, a little stiffly. He wrapped an arm around Bella's slim waist, and I swallowed against the vile taste in my mouth.

She's his now, I reminded myself.

Bella looked up at Luke, then, sensing something, looked around the room.

Her gaze caught mine, and I felt myself stiffen, pulling myself out from Alice's violent, albeit well-meaning support.

Bella looked shocked.

She doesn't want me here. Not in front of Luke.

"Head up, shoulders back," Alice warned, and then she shoved me through the door.

Aro looked up and beamed at us. My skin prickled with suspicion.

It was a well-known fact that Carlisle was a close friend of Aro's, but Carlisle was not here; he was having a romantic Italy tour with Esme. No one wanted to ask questions. That is, no one except Emmett, of course.

From what I could gather about Aro's personality through what Carlisle told me, Aro was greedy, opportunistic, and had a knack for making things go his way. Call it what you may; charisma or blackmail. To me it was much the same thing.

Aro introduced us to the Volturi Guard, and then announced that he wished to ask for a favor from us.

Why am I not surprised?

Bella, though, clearly was. Her jaw was slack as she turned to Luke.

She asked a question, and gaped when he gave an answer. It was clearly not what she had expected.

Aro promptly dismissed everyone but Bella, Luke and my family.

Aro glided up his throne and gestured for us to come closer. My family immediately formed a protective convoy around me, and shuffled- no, escorted- me forward.

He poured a few glasses of blood and offered them around. Bella and Luke each took one. Bella sniffed her glass and took a cautious sip. Her marble nose wrinkled, and she put the glass down.

"So. Cullens. I would like to offer you a place in the Volturi." Way to drop a bomb, I thought. Bella looked like she wanted to pick up the glass again just so that she could drop it with a crash onto the floor, and break the tense silence that had descended upon us.

"All of you, but most importantly Edward and Alice, are invited to join us, of course, and I would appreciate if you agreed." I snorted quietly.

"Oh no, thank you," said Alice, smiling tightly. "I mean, I already have all I want. I'm very contented already."

Aro started to protest, but Alice held up a pale hand, and he silenced himself. I half-wanted to grin. Brave, unshakeable Alice. She stopped vampire royalty mid-sentence with a hand.

"The answer's 'no', and that's final. I already have a family Aro. I can't just abandon them." Her face filled with horror that might have been too real to be false. Alice always was a brilliant liar.

"Oh, but they could join the Guard too, sweet Alice," Aro pleaded, which did nothing else other than make me even more suspicious.

To stop vampire royalty while speaking was one thing, but to make him beg... That was something I had not quite anticipated.

Aro smiled fondly at her, and Alice smiled back, but I could feel the others glaring distrustfully at him.

Bella turned and hid her face in Luke's side, like she couldn't bear what would happen next.

Luke lifted his shoulders and dropped them- a shrug.

I felt a wave of jealousy slam into me, and swallowed hard against it. The monster inside me roared and struggled against its bonds, demanding to be let out. The table splintered under my fingers.

Then I realized something. Alice chose not to accept Aro's offer... because she already had everything she could possible want, everything she could possibly need.

I did not.

In my family, I was the only one missing my soul mate. And here was a chance, my chance to finally correct that. If I joined the Volturi, I would have a greater chance of getting Bella back.

If they aren't already mates.

Bella meant more to me than anything in the world, more than my whole family combined. And if I joined, they could visit whenever they wanted.

And if you lose? To spend eternity watching Bella and Luke staring into each other's lovesick eyes?

You are not indispensable, Edward. You can only read minds. Bella can do that. And more.

Aro must have realized I hadn't voiced my opinion, because he suddenly turned to face me, smiling in a very disconcerting manner.

I felt what little color left in my face slowly drain away. Not now. I couldn't make this decision now.

Alice nudged me, and I felt a flare of anger. Couldn't she see my dilemma? Couldn't she tell how much I wanted to say "I'm in," and nod curtly at Aro? Couldn't she see my future blurring between the two options?

Of course she could; she was Alice, after all.

She shook her head in the smallest of nods.

I took the cue, but I was not quite ready to completely say an outright "no". Not yet, anyway.

"I-I need s-sometime to-to think," I finally managed to stammer out. Bella's draw hung open in shock, the second time in about… 6 minutes and 22 seconds.

Your place is with us, Edward, Rosalie reminded me angrily. Not with these… pathetic excuses for vampire royalty! She spat.

Bella is not pathetic.

"Of course, my dear boy," Aro's relief saturated the air. "Take all the time you need to consider my offer." He smiled again, but to me it looked like a smirk.

Alice was making quiet little gasps that sounded a bit too much like hyperventilation- vampires hyperventilate?- and Jasper was rubbing soothing circles on her back, his face dark and brooding as he tasted our emotions with his sensitive power.

Rosalie looked like she wanted to hurl me into the wall and pummel me until I begged for mercy. Emmett looked like the only thing restraining her.

Luke looked positively horrified. And Bella... Bella had the strangest mixture of expressions running across her face, chasing each other so quickly I almost missed them.

She looked concerned and worried and confused and eager and…pleased. Like she was expecting something good to happen.

Something good happening? I sincerely hope so.

Aro dismissed us, but he looked less than happy. At least, judging from his thoughts.

I wondered briefly if Bella was hearing those same thoughts.

I was in shock.

And then it hit me.

I had a chance- a small chance, but a chance nonetheless- to getting Bella back. And this chance started now.

In around 25 minutes, it was time for my Healing sessions with her.

And then I would start using that chance.

Oh, yeah! Finally! Ohmigod, I think I spent like a month- or was it two?- on this chapter. Geez. I really should manage my time better.

I should be doing my Philosophy Project on Discrimination now, but oh, honestly, who cares? And it's not like the teacher is going to make us hand it in ASAP.

Now I'm going to go downstairs to look for those California Raisins coated in chocolate- which I was supposed to bring to KY's (my bestie) house, and FORGOT. *whacks head continuously*

Never mind. Her loss. I'm going to feed my face- Ha! In your face!- until I get fat and my dad reminds me yet again to go jogging. YEAH RIGHT. Like that's ever gonna happen.

School starts in 2 days... Oh darn. So much homework, so little time. Is it just me or does everyone feel that way too? Haha.

Love you loads (if you reply! *thunder and lightning in background*),

Judith