I know this chapter is short. but I am really proud of it and like it this way. betas agree. so. please enjoy!

Fuck Kakarot.

No, seriously, fuck him. Pretentious third-class waste of space. Selfish, unworthy bastard. I can't believe I showed up to his 'welcome back' party.

Of course when I say 'showed', I mean 'lurked on a nearby rooftop'. And when I say 'came to welcome him' I mean 'waiting for an opportune time to knock him in the face'.

Still, I thought it was mighty nice of me.

Especially because Kakarot's supposed welcome back party was also the Nameks' goodbye party. Talk about a major annoyance. No, I understand that getting the green freaks off your planet is reason to celebrate. I'd seriously be willing to throw flowers at them and give away free food as well just to see the back of them. Though the tearful hugging-touching and snotty good-wishes are beyond my acting skills. Seriously, eeew.

But the woman and her rag-tag group of underling warriors went through all the trouble of finding those Dragon Balls, and then were willing to spend two whole wishes on the fool. You'd think he'd at least accept. But nooo. Not Kakarot. Fucking idiot is just too good for that kind of thing. Says 'I'm busy'. And says 'can't wish me back right now'. 'Now is not a good time,' and says 'Oh by the way I'm not dead. Sorry if that was confusing.'

So fuck him sideways until his legs fall off. Seriously.

I'm out of this dump. The woman's gravity chamber is a spaceship too, so why stick around? So long and fuck you all. Loseritis might be catching.

As a side-note, Vegeta's empire might not be working out. It seems what's left of the PTO— those willing to join my side with non-lethal coercion— fall into two categories: the kind that you cannot turn your back on without finding a knife stuck into it, and the kind of cowardly kiss up that I cannot stop myself from killing however hard I try.

And seriously, I tried. Gave myself the whole pep-talk. 'Don't blast them, Vegeta', I told myself. 'You know they're going to be revolting monsters, but they could be useful.'

Still, I come face to face with their icky alien mugs and my xenophobia kicks in full throttle. Then they start laying false praise down and I feel like they're leaking goo on me. It's like how some of you humans squish spiders, right? Natural reaction.

Whatever. Who'd want to lead a bunch of losers like the PTO anyway? They always were just dead weight. Happy to take advantage of you while you lived in favour, but would any of them ever consider— I don't know— helping you when you were down? Can you imagine any of them wishing Frieza back? No, they're all too busy dancing from the ceiling rafters celebrating his demise. And let's face it, in a popularity contest, I'm probably the only one that could lose to that degenerate tyrant. Everyone hates Saiyans. But even Saiyans hate me. Hated me.

Now there's only one other Saiyan left and he's too stupid for even such a simple thing. Though I hate him back plenty.

Still, I've decided to look for Kakarot. Maybe I'll kill him. Maybe I'll clobber him hard enough, add some more brain damage and enlist him. That would be my one-man army right there. How would that be for irony? And he looks Saiyan enough that I don't feel sick when I need to speak to him. Though that would be ruined the moment he starts talking back. Maybe I should rip his tongue out for safety. Yeah. that would serve him right. Fucking simpleton. Don't know what they see in that fool anyway.

I'm running out of gas. Maybe the best course is going back to Earth and waiting for him there. He'll show up eventually, right? He is their hero. And what kind of hero just roams around in space? You never know when the next calamity hits Earth. Why, it might be me. Yes, might as well go back.

I never did enjoy space travel much anyway.