I'm so sorry I missed last week's update! I had a crazy week at work and too many social things on in the evening. I did spend this last weekend firming up the next few chapters though, so I have no plans to abandon you in the near future!

I just wanted to add a little author's note about some familiar characters you may be missing… like a hot blonde, a gentle beefcake, or that guy with the russet skin… Basically, ever since I started this story, it's been in two parts, and those guys got marshalled into the sequel. Now, I don't know if my writing necessarily warrants a sequel, but it's been simmering away this whole time, so it's happening. But not just yet.

Read on, if you're not too mad at Edward…

For recognizable characters and settings, see Stephenie Meyer.

For teenage indiscretions, I'm your woman.

And a SHOUTING shout out to the gems that reviewed – THANK YOU

BPOV

I woke up early and slowly. The brightest light was shining right into my eyes so I rolled over and stuffed my head into my balled up hoodie to try and pry them open without going blind. At first I was confused as to why I was waking up in the backseat of the Chevy and not in my lovely, comfortable bed at home. And then BOOM, everything came back to me. The party... the kiss... the forest... Edward's chest…

My own chest filled with anxious energy, that really uncomfortable feeling you get when you've made a mistake, or felt guilty about something. But should I feel guilty? Did I do something to make him think I wanted him to get closer to me? Was that what he was doing? He'd seemed kind of out of it, like he was entirely in control of the situation… Did I overreact when I stalked off to bed? Was it just some random kind of accident?

What it was, was ruinous. Call it an awkward awareness or an uncomfortable avoidance, but that moment of physical connection and what followed had altered the status quo between Edward and me, and it sent me fucking spinning. It dawned on me fully in that moment how much power he had over me, power that I didn't think he even knew he possessed.

Amongst all the uncertainty and mess there was only one thing I was crystal freaking clear about right now: I had to get the hell out of dodge.

I sat up and drank slowly from a lukewarm water bottle, and then with shaky hands I let myself out of the cab. I knew which tent I was looking for as I'd seen them pitching it last night. I really hoped I wasn't about to interrupt any morning glory; that just wouldn't do for my fragile state. As I got closer I wondered what the etiquette was for making your presence known outside a tent. Obviously you can't knock, but as it was still early I didn't want to start shouting and wake up the whole camp. Just as I was leaning towards the option of whispering creepily into the canvas I heard the zip being released. I was met with a rumpled, sleepy head moments later.

"Bella?"

"Hey, I need to talk to you."

The zip opened fully and Claire crawled out wearing tiny shorts, Quil's t-shirt and a foam finger.

"Where did you get that?" I asked.

"No idea. I need some water, walk with me."

I helped her along and scooped a bottle out of the cooler bin, which was now the holding pen for mass amounts of melted ice. I handed it to her then ushered her further away from the tents.

"Why are you up so early?" she asked.

"Well um, I'm going to head off actually."

"Is it Sunday already?" she asked stupidly.

"No… I'm just, um I gotta go."

"What? Whhhhhy?"

I felt bad that she was disappointed but I couldn't face Edward this morning, and the idea of spending another night out here with him was laughably undoable.

"Oh you know… didn't really bond with nature last night. Not feeling great."

"No one will be feeling great this morning Bella. Just wade out the hangover with the rest of us. We'll go the beach and eat hotdogs, it'll be fun."

"Umm really I just want to get going."

"Bella. What's up?"

"Nothing." I answered quickly.

She narrowed her eyes.

Too quickly.

"Ohmygod! Did you hook up with someone last night?"

"No! No, nothing happened last night." And to an extent, that was true. Yes, there was an inexplicable kind of hug situation, but in the grand scheme of things it wasn't much, and it certainly wouldn't constitute "hooking up" by Claire's definition. Really, the only thing that had changed after last night was my level of confusion, frustration and longing. And by 'changed' I mean increased. Multiplied. Shot to the fucking moon.

Claire appraised me so intensely it was if she was trying to coax the secret out of me through sheer will. I ignored this and shuffled her back towards the car park making comments about the party last night to distract her.

"Oh yes! Digs and Jess! I can't believe it. I never thought she'd go for him but damn, they were hawwt last night. She better watch herself though, my boys do not get screwed over by little white girls."

"Claire, you do know that you're a little white girl right?"

"No I'm not."

Ok then.

She came with me over to Sal and pleaded a few more times as I hopped in. I declined her insistent, bordering on offensive demands and stubbornly waved goodbye as I started the engine. I winced as soon as the grunts sounded, and out of the window I could see some grouchy heads poking out of tents ready to death glare the shit out of the person causing so much noise at sunrise.

I definitely felt cowardly as I drove away, but I couldn't deny the tension was easing off my shoulders with every mile of distance I put between me, Edward, and that goddamn forest.

When I got closer to home I wondered what I would say to Charlie as he expected me to be out until Sunday. I really didn't feel the need to unfold my pathetic drama for him, but I didn't want to feign sickness either because then I'd have to stay inside all day. What I really needed right now was a shower, fresh air, and coffee, in whatever order. A wide, shit-eating grin grew on my face when I saw the driveway was empty.

Thank you Jane.

I let myself in and miraculously bypassed the coffee machine. I decided I needed to go for a run to try and evacuate all thoughts and memories of Edward from my mind. In my room I quickly stripped everything off as I need my industrial-strength sports bra for jogging, and the underwear I was wearing were prone to riding up with exercise. I headed for my dresser, but as I passed my full length mirror, I stopped.

I never really like, looked at myself fully naked.

I didn't have crazy body angst, despite Renee's best efforts, but there were definitely things I didn't like. Most of the time though, I just sort of forgot about my physicality, beyond shopping for the right size and fit of clothes. But since meeting Edward, I've felt so much more aware of my body; it responds to him automatically, this frenzied, prickly heat just scales every inch of skin, aching for his touch and his gaze. I was so fucking turned on by him it was insane. I raked my eyes across my ghostly flesh. My natural aversion to the sun meant my skin tone was pretty even all over, which I did quite like. Having dark hair follicles beneath the surface I didn't enjoy quite so much - high fucking maintenance. I gazed over my hips and stomach. I wasn't a keen athlete by any means, but I'd hit puberty pretty early which meant my days of eating mountains of peanut M&Ms at no physical cost were long gone. I abhorred organized sport, but I'd gotten in to running just over a year ago and I actually really enjoyed the release. I also tried to fit in some yoga every week as it helped to tone and lengthen my muscles, which I was convinced made me look a fraction of an inch taller.

What would Edward see if he looked at me like this though? Would he immediately notice that my left boob was bigger than my right? Would he think my nipples were too small? Would he mind that I wasn't waxed bare? Or that I didn't have a Beyoncé butt? Would he flinch at the scars?

I frowned at my reflection. God, why am I even thinking about Edward? I had no fucking clue what happened last night, what it meant, what the intention was behind it, if there even was one… but I needed to try and claw back some semblance of control.

I dressed quickly in my running gear and headed for the forest at the back of my house. I had to execute a very sharp U-turn ten seconds later because the scenery was too reminiscent of last night and it was throwing memories at me that were were cruelly sensory. I would have to take the suburban route today.

-0-0-0-0-0-0-

EPOV

I was fucking uncomfortable when I woke up. It seems I'd rolled myself into a fetal ball at some point during the night and my limbs were shrieking in protest. I tried stretching out in the two-person tent, thinking that they really should have stipulated on the box that it was a two-Alice-sized-person tent. I looked over and observed Mel's sleeping form next to me, and my thoughts reversed back to last night. I'd thought nothing of it when Mel asked me to walk with her to Luke's car once we'd finished pitching our tent, and I was completely taken aback when she pushed me against said car and initiated a kiss with the kind of enthusiasm that had been conspicuously absent in the last few months. It felt… odd. Confusing. I think I spent so much time thinking about what was happening that I couldn't really lose myself in the moment. After we broke apart she seemed sort of light and happy, and we actually had a good time together until she abruptly decided to go to bed an hour later, but insisted that I stay up. Maybe she was worried that if we went to bed at the same time I would ...expect something from her, which made me feel dreadful. I wouldn't ever force myself on her, and I hoped she knew that. To be honest, the physical stuff was the least of my concern when it came to our relationship nowadays.

So with Mel gone, and Paul, Luke and Em sinking straight tequila, I'd wandered around the campsite and spotted Bella sitting alone. Shame and self-loathing rocketed through my body when I thought about what had happened with her in the forest. I couldn't…couldn't even make sense of what I did in there, what I was thinking. I had no idea that that was going to happen when we ventured in. It was reckless and stupid, and from her point of view, probably rather fucking rude. But the deeper we went into the forest, the more intense everything became… being alone with her in the dark was heady, heavy. Every rational, decent thought in my head vanished and Bella took over my senses. I had literally been clenching my jaw and fisting my palms to stop myself from making a mistake.

As it turns out, I went right ahead and fucked up anyway. It sounds utterly lame, but it was the magnetic pull that I felt around her. My body reacted on its own, my brain totally disengaged.

I had no idea how much damage I'd caused. I'd been inappropriate in a way that wasn't only fucking rude to Mel, but also confusing and unfair to Bella. And she was so mad.

I sighed dejectedly. I was starting to think that perhaps I was turning into a massive asshole.

My internal mêlée was suddenly interrupted by an almighty wheezing, grunting sound. An old engine. There's only one vehicle here that would make that noise. Mel stirred beside me as I unzipped the tent and scanned the makeshift car park. My stomach twisted oddly as I saw the great red beast reverse, and my guilt escalated as I watched Bella drive away from the campsite, and from me.

Thank you for reading!