13. Physical Training

"I thought we were supposed to be having dinner here tonight," Jean told Murdock as she sat down on the arm of the couch beside him, "What's keeping Hannibal and Face? Didn't he say they were picking it up and then coming here?"

Murdock tiredly raised his arm to check his watch. He had to side with her, they'd been waiting on dinner for so long that he was ready to give up and start chewing the pillows on the couch.

"Hannibal said there was something he wanted to bring up with Face," Murdock recalled, "Maybe that's what's keeping them."

"For as long as they've been gone he must be reciting The Odyssey," Jean replied as she fell off the arm and back against his lap.

"Well at least one good thing's coming out of this," he said as he leaned down to kiss her.

"We're back!" Face said as he stormed in the front door.

"Bah," Murdock said as he straightened up and gave Jean a slight shove off of him.

"Were you making the dinner?" Jean asked.

"Hey listen," Face ignored her and said to Murdock as he put the takeout on the table, "I just got the bad news."

"What bad news?" Murdock asked.

"Hannibal's getting a new obstacle course set up for us to run tomorrow," Face said.

"Oh no, not again," Murdock groaned.

Jean opened one of the containers on the table and smelled the food before actually looking at it. It looked like straight fries and popcorn shrimp, but she wouldn't bet money on that.

"What is this stuff?" she asked him.

"Huh?" Face turned to her, "Oh, we decided to try the food from some new place."

"Yeah?" Jean picked up the container and said, "I think I'll stick it in the oven, you know how it is with fish, can't risk undercooking."

"So did you get any idea what this new one's going to be like?" Murdock asked.

"I tried," Face shook his head, "Hannibal's not budging on the details."

"Oh boy," Murdock groaned.

"I think I just lost my appetite," Face said, dreading what was going to come tomorrow.

"Then I'll have yours too," Murdock said as he picked up another container, "Run that course tomorrow I'm going to need all the fuel I can get to run on."

"Is this going to be like that last course?" Jean asked as she came out of the kitchen, "With Hannibal shooting at us and the electrified fences and all that?"

"Hannibal never does the same thing twice, part of his 'original' sense of humor that nobody else finds funny," Face explained.

"He always changes a couple of things, keeps everybody on their toes," Murdock told her.

"So where is he?" Jean asked, "Isn't he eating with us?"

"He's downstairs breaking the news to B.A.," Face said.

They spent a couple minutes getting everything ready for dinner, by that time Hannibal and B.A. had come up and joined them.

"Now, I'm only going to say this once," Hannibal told the others as they sat down to eat, "We leave tomorrow at 0500 hours."

"Ain't he cute when he tries being technical?" Jean asked Murdock humorously.

Hannibal scowled at her mockingly and told the others, "We're going to be gone all day tomorrow so cancel any plans you've got."

Jean reached over and tugged on the shoulder of his jacket to get his attention. He turned to her again and asked, "Something you want, Jean?"

"Yeah," she nodded once, "Can I come with you guys tomorrow?"

"What?!" Face asked.

Jean sat straighter and explained, "Not to get in your way, but can I come too and try out your obstacle course for a little fun?"

"Fun!?" Face repeated, "Ooh boy you got a sick sense of humor, Jean, you know that?"

Hannibal chuckled at the lieutenant's response and said to her, "I don't see why not, if you don't mind making the trip."

"I already go to work at 5 in the morning, that won't be anything new for me," Jean told him.

Face leaned across the table and whispered to Murdock, "Sadist, she really is, fun!?"

Hannibal yawned as he started to take off his uniform. He looked at the clock and saw it was only a quarter to 10, but after the day he'd had, he was exhausted, and he knew his men were as well. They'd all gone back to their respective homes to collapse in their own beds; all except Jean, who had stuck around with Hannibal for a while.

"Well I don't know about you but I had a good time today," Jean said.

Hannibal managed a tired smile as he unbuttoned his jacket, "I have a feeling you and I were the only ones."

"And you only did because you got to shoot at the others," Jean told him.

Hannibal turned his head and laughed when he saw Jean was still dressed in the fatigues she'd worn that day. He'd gotten similar surplus outfits for Murdock and Face since several parts of the obstacle course had caught and torn parts of their clothing previously, and he'd rather have some expendable clothes for them to run the course in than have to listen to Face gripe about ruining one of his workout suits, and likewise he didn't want to hear from Murdock about ruining one of his own customized T-shirts, and he knew they weren't ready to deal with the awkwardness of Jean getting something embarrassing caught on the barbed wire, easier to just have a surplus army uniform to remove or burn afterwards. It was obvious from watching Jean that she was exhausted as well, but she was still at zenith and looked like a kid at Halloween who wasn't ready to remove her costume even though the night was over.

"Hey Hannibal," she said as she went over to his chair and sat down, "Thanks for letting me come with you guys."

He laughed as he replied, "I'm glad you enjoyed it, and surprised. Tell me something, how is it I've got three men under me in my Team and every single one of them gripes about having to run my obstacle courses, and you run the same course without a single complaint?"

"Because I'm not under your command, and you know when I run the course it doesn't count for anything," Jean said, "You're not holding me to the same standards in performance as them, I only do it for fun, and the exercise"

"Speaking of which," Hannibal reached under his jacket and started unbuttoning his shirt, "Exactly what possessed you to come with us on the run?"

Jean shrugged, "Seemed better than being left alone."

"10 miles, I know you don't do that regularly," Hannibal told her.

Jean nodded and added half cynically, "And I don't run as fast as everybody else and I wasn't able to keep up with everybody the whole time, but the fact remains I ran the 10 miles and I never gave up once and I never complained once, doesn't that count for anything?"

Hannibal turned away from his full length mirror and looked at her instead of her reflection and he said, "Very much…but I still don't understand why you felt you had to come."

"To see if I could," Jean said, "Same reason people swim the English Channel, only reason anybody ever does it is to see if they can do it."

"I suppose so," he replied.

In truth he had been very surprised, both when Jean asked if she could join them on the run, and when she actually managed to finish it. As per his own train of thought, a 10 mile run was not just a run, it was a dead run, it was a march, it was a climb, it was over dirt, sand, jagged rocks, everything that he thought they may encounter on a mission. For his own men to finish it wasn't anything spectacular, he put them through these training sessions all the time to keep everybody in tiptop shape. And he honestly hadn't expected Jean to try running the whole course, certainly not to finish it; and when she did, he looked down at her feet several times between then and the trip home to see if blood was pouring out of her boots. Looking at her now, he could tell that she was exhausted, and he decided it might be a good idea to get her back to her own place before she dropped.

"Why don't you get changed, and then I'll take you home?" he asked.

Jean got up from the chair and when he went into the bathroom to finishing changing out of his uniform, she went over to the bed and moved to lift her foot to the bed and undo the laces on her boot. But she remained where she stood, and slowly took in a heavy breath and called out, "HANNIBAL!"

Hannibal ran back into the bedroom and came up behind her and asked her, "What's wrong, Jean?"

Jean was doubled over the bed and the top half of her body was shaking as she took in a sharp breath, and tried to swallow the sound that still escaped from her throat.

"Hannibal," she said in a suddenly weaker voice, frightening him because she sounded close to tears, "Hannibal, I can't walk!"

"Maggie, are you sure?" Hannibal asked as he kept the receiver to one ear and kept the other sharp for any sounds from Jean, "You're sure that the run couldn't have done it? …okay…what about…what's that? Well how would we find out of it that's the problem?" Hannibal turned around as he got an earful of something he didn't want to hear. "Do those people make house calls? You do? Any idea when one of them could come out here? Tomorrow? Look, Maggie, is this something that we need to take her to the hospital for? I don't want to, but if we have to then I will…you think she'll be safe here for the night? You what?" Hannibal rolled his eyes, "Congratulations, but what's that got to do with this? Oh…I see…well…" he put the phone down and ran his free hand through his graying hair, "I can't think of anything like that right off the bat but…" his eyes moved towards the door when he heard someone knocking, "Maggie, I've got to go now, see if you can get one of those specialists to come here in the morning, okay, goodbye."

He hung up the phone and went over to the door and opened it up, and Murdock all but fell into the apartment.

"Where is she, what's wrong? What's the matter?" Murdock asked frantically.

Hannibal put his hands on the pilot's shoulders to get his attention and told him, "Calm down, Murdock…Jean's in the bedroom, I don't think it would be a good idea to move her tonight."

"W-w-well w-wh-what's wrong with her?" Murdock asked as he pulled Hannibal's hands off of him, "Did she get hurt or what happened?"

"Captain, calm down," Hannibal ordered him, "Now look, I've got her in bed resting right now, I managed to get her wrangled into a pair of my pajamas for the night," he neglected to add the trouble he'd had getting her out of her uniform and into them. They were rather large on her but he figured they'd do for the time being.

"H-Hannibal you think maybe it was something at the course today or the, the 10 mile run?" Murdock asked, "I mean you know Jean's not used to that kind of strenuous activity…"

"I know, but I talked to Maggie about it and she doesn't think that it was anything that we did today," Hannibal told him, "Now, Maggie's been seeing a psychiatrist, socially…"

"Well good for her but what's that got to do with this?" Murdock asked.

"You didn't let me finish," Hannibal told him.

"Oh, sorry."

"Anyway, he's been telling her about some new cases he's been seeing where a patient psychosomatically creates physical problems, you know anything about that, Murdock?"

Murdock nodded, "The mind is a very powerful thing, you can make yourself sick by thinking about it…but why would Jean think herself into paralysis?"

"That was my question too, but this guy told Maggie about a woman who couldn't walk for 2 years and had to be on strict bedrest, and there was no known medical cause for it…years later it was theorized that it was built up in her mind because she'd left home at a young age and regretted the decision as soon as she landed on her own two feet, and if she was sick and couldn't walk, her mother would have to bring her home and take care of her until she was ready to leave on her own."

"So you think this could be something subconscious?" Murdock asked.

"It's a theory…now Maggie's going to send someone over tomorrow to look at Jean to determine if it actually is a purely physical problem or not, something that we're not seeing…but I think whatever's wrong with her, it would help her a lot if you were with her right now," Hannibal told him.

Murdock nodded frantically, and moved towards the bedroom.

He opened the door quietly and saw that Jean was in bed, but she wasn't asleep. She had her head turned to the side and buried in one of the pillows.

"Jean," he said in a low whisper as he closed the door behind him and moved towards her, "How're you feeling?"

Jean turned her head to the front to look at him and she managed a sad smile and replied in a quiet voice, "Hi, Murdock."

"What happened, hon?" he asked.

She shook her head sadly, "I don't know, Murdock, I just…one minute I was trying to get my boots off, and my legs just kind of locked up."

Murdock pulled the covers back slightly and saw that she was changed out of her fatigues and into a large pair of blue striped pajamas that fit her like she'd shrunk in the dryer. He ran his hand under the sheets and felt down to her feet.

"Feel that?" he asked.

"Yeah."

He moved his hand up and touched her knee. "Feel that?"

"I can feel it, I just can't move it," she said.

"Uh…" Murdock stood up straight and looked like somebody just stuck him with a pin and deflated him, "You mind if I lie down for a minute? I just ran all the way over here and I'm…" he sank onto the other side of the bed as he started to remove his jacket.

"I'm sorry Hannibal called you," Jean said.

"Don't be, this isn't something I would want to be kept in the dark about, if something's wrong with you, I ought to know it," he said.

Jean managed to keep a smile on her face but it wasn't convincing, as she said to him, "You know what really scares me, Murdock?"

He leaned over to her and asked, "What's that?"

She looked up at him and explained unusually calmly, "That one of these days, something like this is going to happen, and the doctors are going to say 'sorry, there's nothing we can do, you've already had too much damage happen to you'…you know how many times I've been in the hospital since I met you guys?"

It was obvious from watching her how much this thought truly scared her. Murdock could see her visibly shaking against the mattress and pillows and he could hear her teeth start to clack together like she was freezing.

"Jean," he said as he leaned over her and managed to reach his arms underneath her to hug her, "Now you know that's not going to happen."

"You can't be sure of that, Murdock," she replied as a stutter started to accompany her shaking, "And if it does…it'll be bad enough for me…but there's no reason why you should be stuck with that…with an, an, an-in-ev-alid, invalid for a wife."

The look in his eyes changed and she could see him clench his jaws together and he firmly told her, "Don't talk like that."

Jean managed to pull the top half of her body up and she cupped his face in her hand and she told him quietly, "I love you," and kissed him. Then she let go of him and sank back against the bed and added, "But this doesn't have to be your problem, and I'd strongly urge you not to take it."

"Jean, I'm not going anywhere," he told her as he shook his head, "Not without you."

"Nothing's been finalized," she said, "Nothing's holding you to it."

"I am," he replied.

"I'm scared, Murdock," Jean told him.

"I know," he said as he took her hand in his and squeezed it assuredly, "And if I was in your position I would be too…but tomorrow you'll be better, I think you just overdid it today, what ever possessed you to think you could keep up with us on a 10 mile run?"

Jean smiled over her anxiety and exhaustion, "I did alright for the most part though, didn't I?"

"Considering you don't go through Hannibal's PT regiments on a regular basis like we do, yeah I'd say you did very well."

"Good," she said as she closed her eyes.

Hannibal picked up the two frying pans from his stove and looked at each other of them. One was a cast iron skillet and the other was a light weight stainless steel model…well, not so stainless now after all the years he'd been using it. There was an obvious weight difference in the two and he tried figuring which would be best to use.

Murdock came into the kitchen dressed for the day and said, "Morning, Colonel."

"Morning, Murdock, Jean doing alright?"

"Well she's able to move around a little in the bed now, that's an improvement over last night," Murdock answered.

"Mm-hmm," Hannibal tested the weight of both frying pans at once, and turned to the captain and asked him, "Murdock, if you were trying to bash somebody's brains in, which of these would you use?"

Murdock looked at the two frying pans and seemed to seriously contemplate the question before reaching for the blackened cast iron pan.

"That's what I thought," Hannibal said as he put the other down and went into the bedroom, Murdock following behind him.

Jean was awake and sitting up in bed, Hannibal noticed she was seated in the middle now instead of off to one side but he didn't dare ask if she'd been able to move herself or if Murdock had put her there.

"How're you feeling, kid" he asked.

"Better," Jean said, but it was obvious she wasn't going to be getting up anytime soon.

"That's good," Hannibal told her, "Look, Jean, I've got to get down to the studio or I'm going to get fired, so unfortunately I won't be able to be here when the doctor comes…" he went over to the bed and put the frying pan down within her reach and told her, "But I'm leaving this here, so if that doctor tries giving you an injection without asking first, like the last one did, then just use this and beat his head in."

"Okay," Jean replied as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

Hannibal sat down on the edge of the bed and told her, "Hey, I'll see you when I get home from work, okay?"

Jean nodded, "Okay."

"Good," Hannibal leaned over and kissed her and said as he got up. Then, with his hand being quicker than her eye, he snaked his hand under the blankets and tickled her foot. Jean reached out and kicked at him, which Hannibal took as a large sign of improvement.

"And Murdock's going to be here incase you need anything," he added.

"Well, up till the doctor comes anyway," Murdock explained, "Then if I need to get out, I will."

"Oh don't," Jean said, "Don't leave me alone with whatever fruitcake Maggie's sending over, the whole lot of them are perverts, perverts or pushers, take your pick."

Hannibal didn't get back until late in the afternoon, he'd just gotten in the door when he saw Murdock and Jean in the living room; Jean had gotten dressed sometime during the day but now she was on her hands and feet on the floor, crouched down so low her knees were practically touching the carpet, and giving her some resemblance to a frog, Hannibal thought.

"Is that the way you walk now?" he inquired.

Jean looked up to Murdock and held her arm out to the side; Murdock reached down, grabbed it and helped pull her to her feet. Jean stood there for about a minute, not moving forward any though her knees moved a bit and a couple of times her legs wobbled and she started to crouch down again but kept herself on her feet and standing straight. Then she took one step forward, then another, and another, each one making a longer distance across the room than before. Hannibal looked amused and applauded her actions.

"So what did the doctor say?" he asked.

"He said that he couldn't find anything that would cause temporary paralysis," Jean answered, "But he did examine me and came back with about a dozen places where something's either pulled, pinched, or sprained in my legs, and shin splints…he suggested I take it easy for the next few days and gave me some kind of goop to put on the sore spots, but at least now I can walk."

"Well good," Hannibal said, the expression on his face the tip of the iceberg for the relief washing through him.

Jean looked at him, appearing a bit disappointed, as she said, "So I guess I won't be running anymore obstacle courses anytime soon."

"Just as well," he told her, "I don't think we'll be doing the next one for a few months."

"Oh what a shame," Murdock sarcastically muttered under his breath.