Wow, oh my God. Ok, sorry this has been so long! My summers always get crazy with work because I'm no longer going to school so I lose all sense of a schedule. I can't believe it has been this long since I have updated, and I almost just abandoned this story and started a new one but I hate not finishing something once it's started. Well I hope you all enjoy this brand new chapter…after so many months.

James

Logan has just come into the house when I jump up off the couch that I had been sprawled out on. I know that I have to talk to him before anything really gets started because he is my only hope. I won't control myself, I hope that Kendall will have some control but I know what I do to him, not to sound too cocky or anything. We would be fucking in front of Logan and Carlos before any of us could count to three with no shame. At least not till morning.

Logan is just kicking off his shoes and headed towards Carlos with a bag slung over his shoulders when I step into his path. "Hey. Buddy, can I talk to you for a sec?"

"Uh, hey, James, can I talk to my boyfriend for a sec?" He counters with the slightest hint of confusion and hesitance.

"Go for it; meet me in Kendall's room."

Ok, I know it's weird but I'm freaking out! I don't have anxiety, I promise, but I really want to prove to Kendall and myself that I can do this. Though, it may not be only me who keeps me in check, hence, Logan.

I push past him and head down the hall to my best friends room where I gently shut the door. I know that he is gonna kiss Carlos and I don't want to see it. I want that with Kendall so bad and I'm psyching myself out for no reason. I'm gonna be sleeping with Kendall tonight, why worry about a little kiss, though we have to stay separated. Plus, I feel like I'm about to confess to my mom that I got in trouble with the principle. I sit on the side of the bed, my head down, and fingers laced.

I jump up when I hear a faint knock on the door and Logan squeezes in. "Hey, do you wanna tell me what's wrong with you?" he says as he drops his bag to the floor.

I take a deep breath and just dive into it, "Yeah, so me and Kendall made a deal, and it was my idea, that we weren't going to touch, fight, get jealous, stare at each other, nothing for seven days. When the seven days is up and we have acted like civilized human beings that have been friends for years then we can start over in a real relationship." I take a deep breath and continue, "Though, we were just watching TV after eating a lot of macaroni and cheese and I started thinking. I don't want to do this because what if we do fight, or something happens, we agreed to keep pushing this back another week if we did any of that. I'm freaking out Logan, and I need you to watch me tonight and not let me do anything."

I hadn't noticed that I had been pacing in the small area and when I finish my speech I slump on the side of the bed and look up at Logan who has shock written all over his face. "Ok, first, I just want to put out there that you guys are dumb." I rock my head from side to side since I was expecting that, "Second, look at that God awful sunburn you've got," He says this through a choking laugh that he is trying to suppress and I just glare on, "And third," He has control again, "yes I will baby sit you. Though, why don't you just make this simple and not drink? That way I can enjoy my night and not have to worry about what you may be doing under the covers."

"See! That is another problem. I thought about the whole not drinking thing but with the way I'm worked up, I need it. Plus if I don't drink Kendall wont drink because he will say it's not fair that I can think clearly and he isn't and blah blah blah. I don't want neither of us to enjoy tonight when we will finally get a chance to hang out, just the four of us, and take a fucking chill pill!"

Without a word Logan is grabbing my wrist and dragging me out of the room towards the kitchen. As we pass Carlos and Kendall who are staring at us in confusion Logan commands them to follow.

He lets go of my wrist before he goes to the cabinet to pull out four cups before lining them up on the counter. He opens the sprite and the liquor before pouring both liquids into one cup at the same time. He does this for each cup filling them half and half, not making the drinks strong at all, before he turns handing one to each of us.

Logan finally grabs the last glass for himself before he straightens up and flattens his scrubs before he speaks. "This is to Kendall and James, with their obnoxious ways that I can promise won't end up good until they go through a rough patch," his voice lowers, "or I guess another one. Continuing on! Also in hopes that they can get their shit together for the sake of my saintly and I'm sure Carlos' as well! Now boys, we are going to drink and I'm going to forget about the night at work and take advantage of Kendall's family being gone."

Without a second thought, we are all pouring the strong drinks down our throats. I force myself to swallow the burning liquid along with the gag that comes with it. I open my eyes to the other three trying to get their baring's and we all smile at each other before Kendall speaks, "OK girls. Let's get this show on the road before this gets much cheesier."

Kendall

We have been laying in the dark talking about anything and everything that comes to mind, though none of it will mean anything tomorrow. We haven't talked about anything that is of any importance. Though, Logan did cry because he had one of our residence fall when he was giving them a shower today. He feels really bad about it and thinks that it's his fault. We tried to tell him it's not but he won't believe us. We had an argument over whether or not Teen Wolf is a chick's show or not…I'm still not sure.

I'm hardly thinking straight any more when I look at the clock and realize that it's past 1:30 in the morning. "Logan." I know I'm speaking slowly but I can't myself speak any faster.

"Yeah?"

"What time did you get home from work? "

"Uh, 12:00. Why?"

"Wow, it's late. I think we should call it a night."

"Kendall," This is James talking, "Carlos has been passed out for 20 minutes when we pulled the bed out and turned off the light. We have already called it a night."

Both him and Logan laugh and I just shake my head realizing that they are right and it was stupid to say. Oh, well. With that I roll onto my side to face James. He is lying on his back with his eyes closed, arms wrapped around his middle. I can tell that he isn't trying to sleep, he looks like he is just thinking really hard.

I settle into the bed so that there is a good foot between us. I haven't forgotten about this 'challenge' that we have going and I'm not going to let this get between us...figuratively speaking. I can feel the heat off his sunburn and I know that if I do get to close we both might die of heat stroke…if Logan's drinks don't kill us first.

I have no idea how much time has passed when James' voice jolts me awake. I open my eyes just enough to realize that neither of us have moved and it's still dark and silent. "Kendall, can I talk to you about something?" I can tell that he has thought about this a lot just the way his voice sounds. It's deep and almost distant.

"Sure." Is all I can say because I'm pretty sure I don't want to have this conversation. Not now when I can hardly keep my own thoughts in check and just lying still feels like I'm rocking on a boat or something.

Yup, I can't even think of anything…I'm not sure what I'm thinking. James is talking! "I've noticed that you have been looking like you're eating better. You ate really good with me today."

I open my eyes and look at him. He hasn't moved a bit, his eyes not even open. I prop myself up on my elbow and it's all I can do to concentrate, "What are you talking about?" I know exactly what he is talking about, though, and I can feel everything in my stomach begin to churn.

He shrugs, "I don't know. Just that you have put on some weight and I'm glad. You were so skinny when you left to your aunts. I'm just saying that I noticed and I'm proud."

I don't even think before I speak, I just say what comes to mind first, "James, what the fuck!" this gets his attention and he opens his eyes to look at me in shock but I don't hesitate before I continue, "What are you trying to say? I'm getting fat again? Look at you? You don't have to do shit to keep that body. You worked out for three years in high school and you've gotten to keep it for hardly anything. I stand next to you every day and think why do you love me? How can you love me when I've got my fucking belly back? My stomach isn't flat and I'm ashamed of it but I know that if I don't eat it will kill me so I do, and now you bring that up? What are you-"

I stop before I'm rolling over so that my head is hanging off the side of the bed and barely in time before I'm vomiting everything from my stomach. It burns as it comes up, just as much as it did going down. The taste makes me continue vomiting. I can feel the tears in my eyes and Logan is yelling because I'm pretty sure that if I didn't throw up on him, it's right next to him. I don't pay attention to what he is saying.

I feel James' hand on my back, rubbing circles over my shoulders. "No! Don't touch me!" I yell before I'm shoving my fingers down my throat. I want this stuff out of me! I don't need the calories that are being consumed by my body. I can't have them. If I don't get rid of them I'm never going to lose the stomach I have created. I know that I shouldn't be doing this, much less in front of my friends. The light is on now and my stomach is hurting since I'm forcing everything out of it. But it doesn't last long because James is pulling at my arm and he is yelling at me to stop. I know I'm not thinking straight, I'm still trying to get my fingers in my mouth.

"Kendall! Stop." James is pulling me onto my back and I'm fighting him. I don't want him to touch me and I'm sobbing, I can't even speak. I'm thrashing around, blankets being kicked in every direction. He is trying to get my wrists and I'm flailing trying to keep him from getting any grip on me.

Suddenly he has my wrists pinned at the sides of my head and I'm looking up at him, his torso pressed to mine to keep me in place with his weight. His eyes are wide and filled with concern, his breathing heavy from the fight. I can see Logan and Carlos watching and standing perfectly still next to the door but I'm able to completely ignore them as I glare up at James, "Get off of me." My voice is deep and threatening.

"No, because what the hell came over you? I never would say or think any of that about you, Kendall. I don't know where that came from." A look of disbelief has come over his features and I don't know what to say. I turn my head away from everyone so no one sees the tears that are still flowing silently. "Are you done?" James is asking me.

I just nod. I can't talk. My throat is burning and raw, I probably couldn't talk because of my crying anyways.

He lets go of my wrists and I don't move. He rolls back over so that he is on his side, facing me, his face close to mine. I just look at him. "Do you want to wait till tomorrow to talk about this?" He asks and I nod once more.

I watch as he gets a look of hesitance before he opens his arms. I curl into a ball against his body, his strong arms wrapping around me completely. I'm so tired I can't even keep my eyes open. And to be honest I don't want to. I just want to fall asleep like this. I am already fading from consciousness when I hear James speaking lowly. "Please just shut off the light, you can leave the door open." No one answers. The light just turns off and I'm asleep.